Alright Mary: All Things RuPaul's Drag Race

We are officially Nicole Paige Brooksless this week as Bracket 3 kicks off with a wickedly wonky team-based design challenge and six new queens with big shoes to fill. Of course we also have to hold space for contractually featured guest judges Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande. Ginger and Daya defy expectations to take the win while Acid Betty is stuck with a pin, Denali does a pique turn, Cynthia is giving My Cousin Cucu and Alyssa Hunter is gunning for a longer arc this season. 

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Mischief Isabelle Brooks is in full force for this final lap of the bracket and not everyone is feeling gapey about it. A rather on the nose villains vs heroes Starrbooty Rusical leaves Nicole in shambles, Tina overshadowed and Kerry robbed. Meanwhile Jorgeous is apparently Broadway bound, Lydia is a used Butthole but a fortunate pawn, and the true All Stars 10 villain is on her way to terrorize the semifinals. 

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This week’s roast is rapped up and hot to go! And for some queens it was even pre-written! The burns start well before the challenge between the feuding Brookses and one Texas diva left out of the alliance. Meanwhile Butthole is torn between two mother figures but Jorgeous continues to feel very muggy. Chappell Roan makes some noise on the judges panel and the runway blossoms with groundbreaking florals for spring.

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Bracket Two gives us a couple of Brookses, a Butthole, a Colby, a comeback for Mrs. Burner and a now three season veteran who is still too young to legally rent a car. We get the ball rolling with a ball, but this episode is mostly Isabella holding court in the workroom, derailing the Ru-Sees and dueling with Tina before getting royally face-cracked on the runway by her old rival and daughter to be.

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It’s time to put pen to paper and likeliness to college basketball player for this week’s girl group makeover challenge that decides who will join Irene in the semi-finals. Principal Skye is in full effect, Bad Babysitter Bosco has the Goddess in capable hands, Olivia makes beautiful music with Heaven spelled backwards, and there’s no alliances left for Aja, now with wings. Phoenix is ultimately locked up in last place but ironically ends up holding the key to the Top 3 spot. Kate Beckinsale from the movie Pearl Harbor is the guest judge and Detox is our featur...

As a wise woman once asked, are y’all ready to rock and roll? The first bracket of All Stars is kicking off this season with a glam rock girl group before getting their knives out for a southern fried murder mystery. Irene the Alien crash lands into a redemption arc, Aja is giving tristate area hair stories, Principal Skye is back from sabbatical, Bosco zips to the top of the pack, Phoenix is Delphine Brigandi and Olivia isn’t joking bitch. Rupaul wins his own challenge, we’re hot and cold for the guest judges and this new format...

It’s been Onya’s season to win since she walked into the workroom in that vest, but this finale had us a bit nervous. Sam’s red carpet and Lexi’s rollerskates left them both primed for an All Stars comeback, and Crystal winning Miss Congeniality mayo feel righty real! But it all came down to the burger queen of Cleveland vs Tampa’s answer to Tracee Ellis Ross. Abracadabra may not have been a magical lip sync for either of them, but some seasons it does just come down to track record. Also Liza was there!

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The Top 4 take a break while the eliminated queens duke it out for $50,000 and potential reputation redemption. We get a Liza With a Z disrobing, wall to wall wig whipping, Joella’s little skirt, Crystal’s condiment heavy compliment, Bruno’s hosting skills and a final showdown between the Poor Little Matchstick Girl and the HBIC. 

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The final five roll the dice on the chance to join Drag Race LIVE! in Vegas, but first they need to do a pseudo TicTac lunch with Latrice and film a kiosk promo for an act we know nothing about and never see. We do get a Ru directed photo shoot, but it also feels 14 weeks late. Then it’s coats and a cloche on the runway and two different Rosses on the panel. Jewels shines, Onya’s nerve and Lexi’s heart take them both to the finale, Sam is almost country fried and it’s an 11th hour boo...

It’s time to make the Top 5 cry by bringing in their moms and dads for a makeover challenge. Which also means it’s time for us to play casting director. We get to see Suzie as Mrs. Toot’s son, the hurricane of emotions that is the Loves, Mrs. Star as Debbie Novotny, a sparkling sausage daddy and Nunya Bidness LaBelle. 

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As a wise woman once said, this is interpretive dance. The Top 6 are pairing up to present their childhood traumas while their partners shimmy and slither their version upstage. Things then get ugly on the runway. 

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The season has been no stranger to feuds, even passive aggressive ones started through mirror messages, but this week it’s between the queens and a sombreroed Ross Mathews with a compromised larynx. Or is the feud really between director Cheyenne Jackson and his leading man/unofficial AD? Then of course there’s Lexi vs Lexi’s idea of Suzie, and apparently Sam and Lydia never liked each other? Lana’s still fighting with her brand as she once again defies our very clear and well defined expectations of her on the runway. Meanwhile Onya nails it in the challeng...

A Bachelorette, a Housewife, a Royal and Zac Efron’s brother manage to survive a self-destructing turret of Traitors picking each other off and spiraling out week after week, then band together to bring an uplifting and triumphant end to the season. Carolyn easily won the reality TV game, but Gabby’s cultural impact, Dolores’s 11th hour redemption, Ivar’s strategy for survival and Dylan’s side energy are not to be banished too quickly. At the reunion, Bob the Drag Queen makes a meal out of Housewives, Danielle backstrokes and apparently, Ayan is very funny. 

The girls are spiraling over a lineup for this week’s Villains Roast, and plot twist, the biggest villain in the room is in their heads. But upside, Lexi continues to breathe fresh and also totally unfiltered air into her workroom interactions, to say nothing of her prop work or those nails. Meanwhile Arrietty pouts to an inevitable conclusion, Sam gets the good friend award, Onya cooks despite a medium well roast and the Butthole finally tops. 

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It's the third design challenge of the season, this time not inspired by a board game or garbage, but by iconic fashion designer Betsey Johnson (Not to be confused with another famous American upholsterer)! We're very in our 40s this episode, so not too much on our formative pleasures like Crocodile Mile, but we also dig into Lana's delusion of self-awareness, our love of Lexi, and why it was maybe time to dethrone the King. 

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Gabby gets gaggy at this week's roundtable, perhaps in honor of Carolyn, in what is potentially Danielle's swan song. That is, unless we have to wait a whole week to find out Ivar finally went home. Will Brittany repeat history by making it? Will we ever find out who the Seer is? We'll just have to tuck in our shirts and keep our arms down till next week's finale.

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The game takes a tragic turn this week, but one not necessarily out of line for a show called The Traitors. 

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It’s time to ease on down the main stage for this week’s Oz inspired Rusical. 

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We are diving into Season 3 of “The White Lotus”, where deeply unhappy rich people spend a life changing (or ending) week in paradise.

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The Snatch Game comes early this season, giving us eleven reasons to wonder if this challenge needs to finally be blanked. Luckily we get Lexi as Gilbert Gottfried as Lexi as Gilbert Gottfried, Onya on the ball, Alyssa Edwards in the hot seat, Ru openly criticizing Lana’s performance mid-game and a talking butt plug. The runway feels very pointed and Quinta Brunson nails the balance of funny and functional critiques. In an 11th hour goop, Ru saves Lana over Crystal, because sometimes things that are expensive are worse.

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Act Three of the season has begun, and this week is admittedly Sandoval heavy, but maybe that just means he’s out next week. Sam emerges with a good idea at breakfast, Gabby’s social media has propelled her to BSA status and Dylan is following the producer playbook. Danielle should be shaking in her boots at this point, aside from all that other shaking she’s doing. 

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Ding dong, the don is DONE! But first, a wedding full of uninvited guests and some iconic goggles. Carolyn wields a fork with a carrot on it at one point, Sam and Ivar briefly play badminton and sort of make for a cute couple, and Tom looks like he wants to sell you molly out of the back of his Geo Tracker. Brittany holds her own at the roundtable and keeps everyone on topic, which is to get the last and most nefarious of the Cage Boys out of the castle. Now what’s next for Dylan and does it...

On man’s trash is another queen’s runway outfit for this week’s unconventional materials challenge/ball inspired by ocean pollution. Lexi encounters a potential outer saboteur, Crystal gives a bit of Sea Girt, Kori goes Katy and Lana finally gets some feedback. We go down a Techserv rabbit hole at one point. Samanonya!

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Carolyn Wiger eats Cheerios with a fork this week! And while we lose Bob H. in head to toe Thom Browne, Danielle is making such a mess for herself, Tom Sandoval has some more sweaty theories, we have LOTS of feelings about Wes, and Derrick is going full CSI on Boston Rob, who is an eerie reminder of life outside the castle. Sam wears a headband this week and may be this season’s Purple Kelly. 

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Well hardy har, Mary, it’s another episode of RDR. On the plus side, we get the recognition that cigarette moms deserve (and a future episode dedicated to the topic), RuPaul gives it some of her all as the musical guest and Paul W Downs is more than just a pretty face. We have tangents on lesbian voice, another important Rue and this season’s parallels to Season 5, we’re concerned for a certain roller skating grandma auntie who does financial training, and our tinfoil hats are firmly pinned on for this Badunka Dunk sponsored by Las Vegas situation.

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The Traitors are continuing to act like traitors this week with Danielle and Rob vying for most suspicious while Queen Carolyn eats cereal in an impeccable blue pantsuit. Bob Harper couldn’t look sharper, Ivar is turning the straights, Dolores is the last wife in the house, and tragedy befalls the Bambis, which is fitting given their namesake. By the way, Sam is still there. 

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If we don’t make these references into songs and then create a commercial for a compilation album of said songs, we lose these references. Meanwhile, Joella is creating new references, Michelle is coming for trademarks and we have a lot to say about doulas.

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Bob the Drag Queen rattles the Cage Boys this week and sends Boston Rob into Terminator mode. Meanwhile Dolores and Dylan are thick as thieves, Bob Harper has a heartfelt moment, Nikki gives Wes a smackdown, Tom is wide-eyed and blind, and Carolyn and Danielle need to talk. 

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Queens are passing Go this week to collect $5,000 for this season’s Monopoly sponsored design challenge. Speaking of monopolizing things, Joella has an entire dynasty at risk if she doesn’t turn this beat around. Onya gets on Sparkles’ last nerve over some lost trim, Hormona is caught in an attempted jewel heist, Lexi unravels, and Sam makes her grandma proud. Meanwhile Lucky, well, isn’t. 

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We’re queening out on roundtables instead of runways as we kick off our coverage of Season 3 of The Traitors US! This week we have two dozen reality television personalities (and a royal of sorts!) to catch up on and even say goodbye to over the first three episodes. Plus some early predictions, immediate favorites (shield Bob Harper!), and what we think will happen next to this season’s completely chaotic turret of Traitors. 

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If you like lip syncs to original tracks and death drops, you’re just gonna love this episode. 33 year old Auntie Grandma Lexi skates circles around these nepo babies, but Onya has us hanging on her every word and Kori’s ice cube gives good clatter. The runway has something to do with cake or butts but two Marie Antoinettes is officially two too many for Michelle. That Doechii lip sync alters our egos and our minds, and Yes, And? turns into No, But for Hormona, who dunks her way back into the drama she’s started this season and th...

Season 17’s Got Talent, the X Factor and a Voice (even if it’s mostly via a lip sync track) as we kick off a brand new season. The workroom is full of charisma (big librarian vibes, a couple gay cousins, a Jersey boy), and also Katy Perry shows up. We’re seeing Starzz already and feeling a lot of Lexi love, and Ru’s wig in that video message has some stories to tell. 

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And a ho ho ho! To celebrate this holiday week, we’re putting out an OnlyMarys deep dive into this YouTube Christmas classic.But first let me explain something to you, we got too many depends back here and we don’t care about you NOR Antoine. (Oh okay G’MAWNIN’)

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From bad babysitters to confusing runway choices, we’ve got roses, thorns and even some stems to discuss from this week’s “PSAs for UFOs” themed challenge. 

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The queens of Season 5 are indeed going off. We kick things off this time around with a music video that, perhaps with time, will age into camp territory. Taking a page from the book of Brooke, we’re discussing our roses and thorns of the episode and this cast. And also briefly the career of Courtney Thorne-Smith.

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Given the impending election, spooky season has officially been extended this year. And what better way to celebrate than with a deep dive into the all-American nightmare that is 1974’s “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre”! 

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We are currently building secret closets in our bathrooms, stalking LA in an iconic yellow coat, and feeling fully activated by the sensation that is “The Substance”! This movie sends us in so many directions, from body dysmorphia to the terrors of tele-health, Demi Moore in the mirror, Dennis Quaid eating that shrimp, Margaret Qualley’s aunt Sue, and that Carrie at the prom climax featuring the now iconic Monstro Elisue.

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Don’t tell mom the babysitter is Rebecca DeMornay. 

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Well kiss your sister, it’s time to talk about “Flowers in the Attic”! Much has been said about that bathtub scene but honestly that is just the beginning of the bizarre family dynamics in V.C. Andrews twisted tale of attic dwelling siblings. Louise Fletcher is a force to be reckoned with and reason alone to watch this camp classic. 

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This week we’re revisiting some classic Canadian nightmare fuel of the 90s! “Are You Afraid of the Dark?” made us fear and fiend for 9:30pm on a Saturday, especially with indelible episodes like “The Tale of the Laughing in the Dark” with its suburban locale, the lack of adult supervision and the possibility that it was all just a creepy old man terrorizing these kids. 

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