Alright Mary: All Things RuPaul's Drag Race

We are midway through the season and it's midterm elections this week as the queens take a stance on important political issues like padding, foreskin and clown inclusion. Myki is on the MF’ing rise, Darlene puts on a show in her bedroom, Discord hits the right notes, Jane continues to do, Athena is a little bit Alexis, and Veeta’s bags are packed. We indeed can’t keep our eyes off Juicy, but is a Dion Dynasty still headed for the finale or is the Florida vote swinging in a different direction now? 

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The tables are turned this week as the raters become the rated for part two of the talent show. We get thirty minutes of Ciara deciding she can most likely beat Discord in a lip sync and hoping to sway the votes that way. Meanwhile the Dions are keeping all of the wins in the family, the judges are not pleased with Kenya, and Myki almost loses more than a finger before clearing Miss Myst from the competition.

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It’s Part One (“PART ONE?!” - Kenya Pleaser) of the talent show judged entirely by other queens in the room via the unsinkable Rate-A-Queen device. There’s a lot of strategizing but very little surprises as the movers from Miami outrank 60 seconds of physical therapy, an earnest poem, Darlene, and alas, Nini’s gecko. 

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A second design challenge so soon? Groundbreaking. The queens pair up and face off, both on the runway and in the workroom if you're in the extended Dion family teaching cousin Brian how boundaries work. Also, quick sticks!

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Pre-recorded from Simi Valley, it’s RDR Live! Third time’s not quite the charm, but the night is nearly saved by Michelle’s towel acting. Then it’s a zoo on the runway, and a good night for at least one of the Dions. Meanwhile Brian almost bites it before Mandy Mango is told she can go.

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This week, we begin our discussions about The Traitors Season 4 in the US and over across the pond in the UK. In the US, the Housewives make their presence known as faithfuls and as traitors in the castle as a group you don’t want to cross. They are up against a Dylan Efron wannabe, dwindling gamers, and a loud mouth who is ruining the game for everyone else, but the real debate is around the production flub of the Secret Traitor and what might have gone wrong. In the UK, they are all playing the game much better wh...

It’s time for the girls to get into groups, cause it’s a girl group challenge! Punk, pop and disco duke it out for the best eight count verse and least fumbled choreography, which puts the cleverest queen and the one who was a backup dancer for Britney Spears in the Top 2 and and results in a disco inferno for Diane Fuego and Amanda Mango dressed as a side table. 

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Drag Race kicks off its 18th season with some of the oldest bitches in the cut. (Okay, 8 of them are in their 30s.) We get an extended Florida family reunion of the Love Dions and Aunt Starr, a biter from Boston, Trash reclaimed and renamed Darlene, some disrupted Discord, a former mechanical engineer bagging the lip sync and Kenya Pleaser literally trapped in her skirt. Cardi B gets an A as guest judge, Jamal Sims appears on screen to watch the girls reenact Scream 2, and in a dystopian twist it turns out the whole thing runs on the blood...

I don’t know about you Miss Kitty, but Batman Returns is feeling so much gayer. This unofficial Christmas movie about the Penguin’s rise, Catwoman’s coming out and Bruce Wayne’s need to come out all takes place around the holidays in Gotham, with a sabotaged tree lighting, a Christmas party under attack and cold soup by the fire one night in that fussy bachelor pad. Michelle Pfeiffer is the reason for the season as Selina Kyle in and out of the bodysuit, Danny DeVito goes to a 27 and back, Jan Hooks shows up just before that nose bit...

This week, we officially set sail with the cast of season 6 and discover a little more below deck in their group acting challenge. Van Goth continues to Van goad others into battle, Sami Landry exemplifies a cigarette mom to a T, and Dulce shows us her soft side, as does Paolo Perfeccion in her own way. We have a lot to say about who Velma looks like, but we have even more to say about that 'Hellish' lip sync. 

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Best Supporting Paula Abdul helps kick off the season with a supersized Meet the Queens megamix, modestly oversized runway looks and a coldhearted lip sync assassination as the top prize. (That triple split screen had us leaning one ear in.) We have much to say about cigarette families, Vincent Dinofrio, St. Cate's, bucket hats, baby names and of course some early lookalikes. 

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Jennifer Love Hewitt is part of another doomed quartet of rising stars of the 90s getting terrorized by an omnipresent North Carolina fisherman out for even more justice because he still remembers what she did two summers ago. Brandy, Mehki Phifer and Matthew Settle join Julie James on the most convoluted all expenses paid trip from hell to the Bahamas while Freddie Prinze Jr does his own version of The Fugitive via bus, boat and time travel to try and save the day. Jennifer Esposito is an underutilized Nancy, Jack Black has dreads, and the entire staff of the h...

Alright Scary is back this month with a movie your parents probably rented in the 90s, “Malice”! Its ingredients alone make it a cut above the domestic thrillers of the era, with Nicole Kidman, Bill Pullman and Alec Baldwin in a triangle full of twists, a fourth billed Bebe Neuwirth doing her best Columbo, Ann Bancroft devouring an entire set without getting out of her chair, Jerry Goldsmith at his usual bombastic, Shirley Baker as a waitress, Peter Gallagher’s eyebrows, Blythe Danner’s daughter, nurse drag, a beautiful hairy chest and a final showdown in a blind kid’s bedroom...

It’s a jumble out there! The queens are turning challenge props from seasons past into, well, whatever they want. Viola gets strung out over the traitorous takes from a room full of Claudia Winklemans, and it only gets worse for her from there. Meanwhile Bones softens, Chai T gets lost between the cushions, Paige Three sends us on a necessary tangent on 90s Animal Movies, Pasty loses her balance, her shoe, and her shot at the crown and Sally hopefully gets the validation she needs that she really isn't too weird. 

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The UK workroom is alive again with the sound of camp cows, Soho girls, Irish girls, indoor divas, the occasionally unclear pun name, both a violin and a nose flute, and a Gregg’s in a wig. The Pink Carpet sort-of challenge is essentially a version of Squid Game where you just hope to not get interviewed by Plane Jane, and the runway reminds us that this episode is just one big Meet the Queens. Despite some great music, the cow vote was kind of BS. Stay tuned for tangent on the trouble with UPS, plus some early lookalikes. 

Mostly seven but briefly eight queens make it through to a final lip sync battle for the crown and the cash. Kerri hosts the viewing party as Irene is teleported back to Mars, Sister Mary Aja does her little walk and Daya wagon wheel watusis away against her Seattle sister. Lydia puts her whole butthole into Shakira and Bosco attempts to raise her glass above Ginger’s outstretched arms, but this Weather Girls final lip sync was essentially forecasted. Despite Jorgeous’s reign as Mommy’s Favorite, after ten years and four tries it was finally time for a, well...

Before next week’s lip sync smackdown, we get this week’s lip sync smackdown in the form of a talent show! Will Aja jump from there? Will Lydia rely on cumbersome props to tell a bizarre story? Does anyone need to be reminded of the Pharmarusical? While everything comes up Ginger and Jorgeous has an intense reaction to turkey, Bosco’s pretty privilege earns her the win and Mistress is sent back to playing video games on YouTube by her own Butthole. (Unless of course Ross’s absentee ballot sways the wild card lottery away from her fellow Texas di...

It’s time for the queens to come back eight months later and play the Snatch Game! Mistress ends up really taking it on the chin this week, as her Bracket 2 antics land about as poorly as her Natalie Nunn impression with the rest of the girls. Meanwhile Ginger doesn’t break a sweat as Reba and continues her winning streak (of Snatch Games and challenges this season), Aja’s cookie starts to crumble, Jorgeous puts on a bald cap and Cynthia’s Dracula is ironically slayed the week they have Buffy as a guest judge. 

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Sometimes Dolores, being a bitch is all a drag queen has to hang on to. And this week, it’s what it takes to both win the heart and bone of that guy from “Fire Island” and win a spot in the semifinals. While Ginger aptly fetches her third win, Daya finally stops begging Alyssa for a point and retrieves the second spot in the top. Acid and Alyssa are destined for the pound, but it’s ultimately up to them to decide who gets rescued. Alas, being a queen’s best friend pays off for Cynthia while Denali is kept on...

The tonk is particularly honky this week as the queens bring the Grand Ole Opry to the main stage for a girl group challenge that is decidedly more Dixie Chicks than Spice Girls. Meanwhile in the workroom the bottom 4 are spinning their partners round and round over who is gonna nab that third spot in the semifinals, and that’s all before Ginger lassos a second win. To say nothing of the lip sync that had everyone and their best friend Leslie talking. We really miss Nicole. 

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We are officially Nicole Paige Brooksless this week as Bracket 3 kicks off with a wickedly wonky team-based design challenge and six new queens with big shoes to fill. Of course we also have to hold space for contractually featured guest judges Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande. Ginger and Daya defy expectations to take the win while Acid Betty is stuck with a pin, Denali does a pique turn, Cynthia is giving My Cousin Cucu and Alyssa Hunter is gunning for a longer arc this season. 

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Mischief Isabelle Brooks is in full force for this final lap of the bracket and not everyone is feeling gapey about it. A rather on the nose villains vs heroes Starrbooty Rusical leaves Nicole in shambles, Tina overshadowed and Kerry robbed. Meanwhile Jorgeous is apparently Broadway bound, Lydia is a used Butthole but a fortunate pawn, and the true All Stars 10 villain is on her way to terrorize the semifinals. 

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This week’s roast is rapped up and hot to go! And for some queens it was even pre-written! The burns start well before the challenge between the feuding Brookses and one Texas diva left out of the alliance. Meanwhile Butthole is torn between two mother figures but Jorgeous continues to feel very muggy. Chappell Roan makes some noise on the judges panel and the runway blossoms with groundbreaking florals for spring.

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Bracket Two gives us a couple of Brookses, a Butthole, a Colby, a comeback for Mrs. Burner and a now three season veteran who is still too young to legally rent a car. We get the ball rolling with a ball, but this episode is mostly Isabella holding court in the workroom, derailing the Ru-Sees and dueling with Tina before getting royally face-cracked on the runway by her old rival and daughter to be.

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It’s time to put pen to paper and likeliness to college basketball player for this week’s girl group makeover challenge that decides who will join Irene in the semi-finals. Principal Skye is in full effect, Bad Babysitter Bosco has the Goddess in capable hands, Olivia makes beautiful music with Heaven spelled backwards, and there’s no alliances left for Aja, now with wings. Phoenix is ultimately locked up in last place but ironically ends up holding the key to the Top 3 spot. Kate Beckinsale from the movie Pearl Harbor is the guest judge and Detox is our featur...

As a wise woman once asked, are y’all ready to rock and roll? The first bracket of All Stars is kicking off this season with a glam rock girl group before getting their knives out for a southern fried murder mystery. Irene the Alien crash lands into a redemption arc, Aja is giving tristate area hair stories, Principal Skye is back from sabbatical, Bosco zips to the top of the pack, Phoenix is Delphine Brigandi and Olivia isn’t joking bitch. Rupaul wins his own challenge, we’re hot and cold for the guest judges and this new format...

It’s been Onya’s season to win since she walked into the workroom in that vest, but this finale had us a bit nervous. Sam’s red carpet and Lexi’s rollerskates left them both primed for an All Stars comeback, and Crystal winning Miss Congeniality mayo feel righty real! But it all came down to the burger queen of Cleveland vs Tampa’s answer to Tracee Ellis Ross. Abracadabra may not have been a magical lip sync for either of them, but some seasons it does just come down to track record. Also Liza was there!

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The Top 4 take a break while the eliminated queens duke it out for $50,000 and potential reputation redemption. We get a Liza With a Z disrobing, wall to wall wig whipping, Joella’s little skirt, Crystal’s condiment heavy compliment, Bruno’s hosting skills and a final showdown between the Poor Little Matchstick Girl and the HBIC. 

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The final five roll the dice on the chance to join Drag Race LIVE! in Vegas, but first they need to do a pseudo TicTac lunch with Latrice and film a kiosk promo for an act we know nothing about and never see. We do get a Ru directed photo shoot, but it also feels 14 weeks late. Then it’s coats and a cloche on the runway and two different Rosses on the panel. Jewels shines, Onya’s nerve and Lexi’s heart take them both to the finale, Sam is almost country fried and it’s an 11th hour boo...

It’s time to make the Top 5 cry by bringing in their moms and dads for a makeover challenge. Which also means it’s time for us to play casting director. We get to see Suzie as Mrs. Toot’s son, the hurricane of emotions that is the Loves, Mrs. Star as Debbie Novotny, a sparkling sausage daddy and Nunya Bidness LaBelle. 

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As a wise woman once said, this is interpretive dance. The Top 6 are pairing up to present their childhood traumas while their partners shimmy and slither their version upstage. Things then get ugly on the runway. 

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The season has been no stranger to feuds, even passive aggressive ones started through mirror messages, but this week it’s between the queens and a sombreroed Ross Mathews with a compromised larynx. Or is the feud really between director Cheyenne Jackson and his leading man/unofficial AD? Then of course there’s Lexi vs Lexi’s idea of Suzie, and apparently Sam and Lydia never liked each other? Lana’s still fighting with her brand as she once again defies our very clear and well defined expectations of her on the runway. Meanwhile Onya nails it in the challeng...

A Bachelorette, a Housewife, a Royal and Zac Efron’s brother manage to survive a self-destructing turret of Traitors picking each other off and spiraling out week after week, then band together to bring an uplifting and triumphant end to the season. Carolyn easily won the reality TV game, but Gabby’s cultural impact, Dolores’s 11th hour redemption, Ivar’s strategy for survival and Dylan’s side energy are not to be banished too quickly. At the reunion, Bob the Drag Queen makes a meal out of Housewives, Danielle backstrokes and apparently, Ayan is very funny. 

The girls are spiraling over a lineup for this week’s Villains Roast, and plot twist, the biggest villain in the room is in their heads. But upside, Lexi continues to breathe fresh and also totally unfiltered air into her workroom interactions, to say nothing of her prop work or those nails. Meanwhile Arrietty pouts to an inevitable conclusion, Sam gets the good friend award, Onya cooks despite a medium well roast and the Butthole finally tops. 

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It's the third design challenge of the season, this time not inspired by a board game or garbage, but by iconic fashion designer Betsey Johnson (Not to be confused with another famous American upholsterer)! We're very in our 40s this episode, so not too much on our formative pleasures like Crocodile Mile, but we also dig into Lana's delusion of self-awareness, our love of Lexi, and why it was maybe time to dethrone the King. 

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Gabby gets gaggy at this week's roundtable, perhaps in honor of Carolyn, in what is potentially Danielle's swan song. That is, unless we have to wait a whole week to find out Ivar finally went home. Will Brittany repeat history by making it? Will we ever find out who the Seer is? We'll just have to tuck in our shirts and keep our arms down till next week's finale.

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The game takes a tragic turn this week, but one not necessarily out of line for a show called The Traitors. 

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It’s time to ease on down the main stage for this week’s Oz inspired Rusical. 

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We are diving into Season 3 of “The White Lotus”, where deeply unhappy rich people spend a life changing (or ending) week in paradise.

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The Snatch Game comes early this season, giving us eleven reasons to wonder if this challenge needs to finally be blanked. Luckily we get Lexi as Gilbert Gottfried as Lexi as Gilbert Gottfried, Onya on the ball, Alyssa Edwards in the hot seat, Ru openly criticizing Lana’s performance mid-game and a talking butt plug. The runway feels very pointed and Quinta Brunson nails the balance of funny and functional critiques. In an 11th hour goop, Ru saves Lana over Crystal, because sometimes things that are expensive are worse.

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