Assault & Bakery

For the first time in Assault & Bakery history, Kayla and Liz found stand-in co-hosts to yap with. Vance joined Liz for discussions of Moyin’s drip, Gary’s old-guy-ness, and Gabe’s love of sausage… dogs. Kayla was joined by Micah and Izaiah for best bakes and regrettable Fantasy Bake Off choices. 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in our Fantasy B...

For the first time ever in Assault & Bakery history, Kayla and Liz recorded on a Friday night as just friends, not co-workers. Truly a momentous occasion. The tangents and laughter reflect their lack of daily communication, covering everything from AI, Was I In A Cult?, and soggy bread thoughts. Enjoy!  

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in our Fantasy Bake Of...

Kayla and Liz are back with another episode of their hit podcast, Bleu Cheese and Roasted Grapes! It was not a particularly impressive bread episode, which was so disappointing considering the Signature was garlic bread! The conversation meandered to Aldi garlic knots, The Devil Wears Prada 2, and bear nipples (not bare nipples). Enjoy! 

Feedback? Comments? Email us at [email protected]. Follow us on Instagram at assault.and.bakery.pod.

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For the first time ever, it was Audience Choice Week. The Audience and the Bakers AND their special guests did make some choices - some successful, others less so. Kayla and Liz are eagerly anticipating the double-elimination week, a Technical with instructions, and hopefully a chance encounter with Clara once she moves to Georgia. Enjoy!

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play...

First comes Cake Week, then comes Biscuit Week. The Bakers made American cookies, which were probably still a bit too cooked for Americans. Nigella continues to be a gem. The Technical continues to lack written instructions. Kayla and Liz continue to blow out your earbuds with loud laughter. (Sorry. We’ll do better.)

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in ou...

Kayla and Liz got their first taste of this year’s Bakers - and the new judge - in Cake Week. All are utterly delicious. They (of course) join the discourse around the size of Nigella’s bites. Favorite Bakers and bakes and moments are discussed. Don’t forget to sign up for Fantasy Bake Off!

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play a...

It's the most wonderful time of the year! There are mums and pumpkins on porches, the days are a bit crisper, and there are 12 new Bakers in the tent for our enjoyment! Kayla and Liz share their uninformed takes on the Bakers and do a good bit of giggling along the way. No bold predictions, just vibes on who we like and some distractions into Gilmore Girls and the use of air quotes. Enjoy! 

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For the season finale, Kayla and Liz avoided murder and went for a good old-fashioned robbing a vault full of diamonds case. Set in the diamondy-est place on the planet, Antwerp, a group of experts is assembled to pull of this heist. Also, friendly reminder to insure your valuables and maybe make a spreadsheet of all your belongings if you want to get compensated for them if your house burns down. 

Thanks for listening this season. We'll be back in the fall (late summer?) with new episodes! 

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An athlete at the top of the cycling world is murdered before a race. The ensuing investigation is WHYLD. This one hit Liz in the feels, and it taught Kayla that you can ski outside of Colorado. Equally shocking events, to be honest. 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in our Fantasy Bake Off game? Join us! All we need i...

In the outro, Liz says, “We do not revere criminals.” Jodi Hildebrandt has got to be one of the least revere-able criminals out there. This is a toxic mix of counseling, religion, influencing, and parenting. It’s horrific, but Utah looks beautiful. 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in our Fantasy Bake Off game? Join us! All we need is an emai...

For a change of pace, Kayla and Liz discuss a case that is absolutely a bummer but has a happy ending. Elizabeth Smart was kidnapped by a religious extremist/certified nut job and managed to get out alive. It’s a remarkable story of individual strength and perseverance. And some casual harp playing. Enjoy! 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in...

A woman goes missing on a cruise ship. Did she jump? Did she fall? Did she wander off looking to score drugs? Did she get trafficked off by one of the workers on the ship? All of these theories are explored in Amy Bradley is Missing. Kayla and Liz have their ideas as do the half-dozen people who claim to have seen Amy since her disappearance, her friends, family, the FBI, and cruise workers. Learn about the lawlessness of international waters and what a Charlie Drill is. Enjoy!

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It’s that time in the true crime season where Kayla and Liz get really mad about a con artist! It’s so fun! (It’s really not.) But this is a show worth watching and an episode worth listening to. Short version is that 2 teens in rural Michigan start getting anonymous threatening texts. The FBI has to get involved to track down who this texter is. And you’re gonna hate it if you don’t already know! And you’ll hate it even more if you do! 

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A morning-after-Spring-Forward-recorded episode that is pretty coherent. Yes, Kayla thought they maybe spoke Portuguese in Spain and Liz sorta forgot they were recording and talked to the dog a couple times. It’s fine! Angi’s story is about gold-digging and staging murders. It’s a really interesting case. Enjoy! And keep track of your DNA! 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play al...

A Dutch teen posts her 16th birthday on Facebook as a public event. What could possibly go wrong? Honestly, it would have been much worse in the US. Listen to learn about day mayors, night mayors, nightmares, and the stereotypes Kayla and Liz hold for the Dutch — and the US. 

Feedback? Comments? Email us at [email protected]. Follow us on Instagram at assault.and.bakery.pod.

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After a detour back to last week’s episode to clear up some misunderstandsings and ask more questions, Kayla and Liz discuss the unsolved and mysterious death of Sigrid Stevenson. A whodunnit talk with some meanderings into Hamilton (“Everything is legal in New Jersey.”) and lying about murder. Giggle with them through the gore. 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in our...

Kayla and Liz are back from the holidays (including Lincoln’s Birthday and Valentine’s Day) with a new season of true crime cases. First up is the story of Mary Day - who disappeared as a young girl and then reappeared 30+ years later. Or did she?! Liz definitely had a big miss in her understanding of this episode. So that was fun. Enjoy! 

Feedback? Comments? Email us at [email protected]. Follow us on Instagram at assault.and.bakery.pod.

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The finale made it final for Series 16! Kayla and Liz discuss the outcome and reflect on the season as a whole. The is talk of accurate and failed predictions, the judges’ inconsistency, and overall satisfaction. 

Thank you for listening to Series 16! Thank you for playing Fantasy Bake-Off (if you did)! The “Assault” portion of the show will be back in 2026. 

Signature: Finger Buns 

Technical: Madeline Tower 

Show-Stopper: Table Cake

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The Patisserie semi-final really made the bakers show their stuff. Stuff was indeed shown! Tune in to learn how many pounds are in 12 kilograms, the truth about bay leaves, and what the least desirable finale outcome  would be for Kayla and Liz. 

Signature: Cream Horns 

Technical: Framboisier 

Show-Stopper: Macaron Sculpture

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play...

The quarter-final Dessert Week is here! Kayla and Liz talked bakes and bantered about Aaron’s reputation, Jasmine’s free time, and strategies going forward for Fantasy Bake-Off. 

Signature: Basque Cheesecake

Technical: Gluten-Free Orange Upside Down Puddings 

Show-Stopper: Free-Standing Trifle 

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Put on your dancing shoes! It was Meringue Week — with a tiny bit of time travel back to Pastry Week to revisit some important oversights. Though it was the first ever Meringue Week, one baker also time-traveled for Show Stopper inspiration. It was also the first time Paul Hollywood gave a left-handed handshake. And the first time Kayla and Liz stayed 100% focused on the content of the episode. (No.) 

Signature: Mini Meringue Pies

Technical: Raspberry Soufflé 

Show-Stopper: Vacherin Glacé 

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Have you ever recorded your podcast and then realize you didn’t mention some pretty significant details? That’s Kayla and Liz this week. There’s just a lot happening outside the podcast that had them distracted. They plan to do their own version of “extra slice” this week so stay tuned for the (somewhat essential) extra content. And in the meantime, enjoy what they managed to remember to talk about! 

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“We recorded then ate seven bars of chocolate. We declared Prue Leith should be a bigger artist.” 

“We’re dressed in sweats. From head to toe. We got hot takes hidden under our microphone.” 

Get it? It was Chocolate Week! And Kayla and Liz like Taylor Swift! And no one reads episode descriptions! Enjoy! 

Signature: Chocolate Mousse in Chocolate Cups

Technical: White Chocolate Tarte with “Artistic License” 

Show-Stopper: Chocolate Fondue Centerpiece 

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Back to school, back to school, to prove to Paul and Prue the Bakers are not fools. There was a lot of "that must be the British version of [insert American thing here]" this week, which was fun for Kayla and Liz and less fun for the Baker who isn't from the UK. Put on your thinking hat and listening ears and enjoy! 

Signature: Flapjacks
Technical: School Cake
Show-Stopper: School Fete

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Kayla and Liz got this bread - in a non-financial way, of course. But this episode is a couple days early so they are getting after it! The Bakers really leavened up this week. (Are you groaning?) This week featured balls, holes, and magic tricks which really push the family-friendliness of the show. But it caused many a wee giggle. Enjoy! 

Signature: Savory Monkey Bread
Technical: Glazed Ring Donuts
Show-Stopper: Celebratory 3-Tier Sweet Bread Cake

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It was... Biscuit Week! (Did you read that in Kayla and Liz's voices? You should. Try it!) The Bakers' skills and personalities are shining like a perfect mirror glaze after a bit of a nervous start to Series 16. Bakers seem to rise and fall between each challenge, making Fantasy Bake-Off particularly fun this year. Kayla and Liz discuss rock painting (with an impressively minimal amount of squealing on Liz's part), dogs eating drugs, and the cultural differences between America and the UK when it comes to soft vs. snapping biscuits. Soft biscuits are superior -- obviously. 

Spoiler-not-spoiler: Kayla and Liz are back! With actual baking activity to talk about instead of wild speculating! But don't worry, there's also plenty of wild speculating. The conversation meanders from Signature discussions of Michelin Stars (and tires) to the Show-Stopper and Bob Ross the drill sergeant and everything in between. (The Technical. The Technical is what is in between those things.) 

Signature: Swiss Roll
Technical: Fondant Fancy
Show-Stopper: Landscape Cake 

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Kayla and Liz are here to do some WHYLD speculating about the Series 16 bakers. They are a hard bunch to get a read on, so it's a particularly banter-y episode. (If you're not here for the banter, why are you here?) They discuss which bakers look like bartenders and baristas, which bakers seem like they'd be a fun hang, and which bakers they think will give someone a haircut in the tent this season. 

Fantasy Bake-Off is returning too! Get in on the action! 

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Kayla and Liz return with the second summer break episode on HBO’s Devil In The Ozarks. This case is sorta local, but also has recent developments not covered in the show because they happened after it was released. Kayla and Liz are again amazed by the details survivors can recall, encourage you to shut your mouth and lawyer up, and talk about their favorite northern Arkansas businesses. Enjoy!

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Kayla and Liz are back for a mini-summer-season with some more true crime tales before Bake-Off returns in the fall. For this episode, they revisit a favorite of Liz’s: American Nightmare on Netflix. It’s a crazy home invasion and kidnapping story with media and police skepticism to complicate things. Watch it. Listen to this episode. Then watch the movie Gone Girl just to see how wrong that association is. 

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It's the final episode of season two and Kayla and Liz are ending with another local-ish story. Set in nearby-ish New Florence, they discuss the story of reptile expert and enthusiast Ben Renick's murder. The case brings up questions they hadn't previously discussed about polygraphs, committing murder together, state troopers investigating murders, sun sneezing, and of course - asparagus pee. 

Be sure to follow @assault.and.bakery.pod on Instagram for information about upcoming episodes. 

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Kayla and Liz cover the 20/20 episode Meet The Other Me. It is the story of Shawn Grate, a modern-day serial killer from Ashland, OH. The detective on this case is a major badass and wrote a book on this investigation. Kayla and Liz are a bit smitten to say the least. Liz also learns what an electric nap is and they share some of their least favorite words. Gagging ensues. And laughing — the loud kind.  

Trigger warning: M**st is said in this episode. 

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Kayla and Liz (AKA: Columbia’s phinest) did a last minute switcheroo and watched Before Daylight. (Snake Farm coverage is coming. Probably.) Before Daylight is the case of the murder of Jesse Valencia. It’s memorable as a hometown murder for Kayla and Liz (though neither lived in Columbia in 2004) and because a local police officer is convicted for Jesse’s murder — twice. Enjoy this day-off, over-caffeinated conversation! 

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Kayla and Liz are off the scam crime train and back on the violent crime train with this week's episode. It's the case of Brad McGarry's murder which initially appears to officers as a robbery gone wrong, but there's more to it. This episode gets into 911 practices (again), Kayla's ability to spot a fraud/Liz's inability to do so, and more hot takes on the American justice system's lack of rehabilitative practices. 

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Part 2 of Scamanda comes to you in 2 parts. (You'll understand when you listen.) Kayla and Liz recap episodes 3 and 4 of the Scamanda series on Hulu which includes conversations with a childhood friend of Amanda's, a psychologist, and an IRS agent. What a line-up! Kayla and Liz talk about the raid of Amanda's home, her sentencing, and speculate how we'll look back on this case in 20 years. 

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Kayla and Liz recount episodes 1 and 2 of the Hulu series, Scamanda. If you are unfamiliar, Scamanda is the story of con-artist and scammer extraordinaire, Amanda Riley. The first episode of the show establish Amanda's history and character. Episode 2 digs into the investigation and why people have suspicions about her. Among discussions of these details, Kayla and Liz also discuss how difficult it would be for them to pee their pants. It's relevant. 

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Kayla and Liz recount the beautiful prison love story of Vicki White and Casey White as told by Netflix's Jailbreak: Love on the Run. It was beautiful love story, until it became a criminal love story, and then it got even messier. Kayla gives some notes on how she would have done this differently. They both agree that a 6'9" prisoner is unlikely to be the man of their dreams. 

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Kayla and Liz and basement banter are back with an episode of 20/20 this week. Explosive Secrets covers the case of Gary Triano’s death. It’s thorough, but Kayla and Liz still have questions… mostly about why they don’t have wealthy husbands. 

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In Bake Off Times: Want to play along in our Fantasy Bake Off game? Join us! All we need is an ema...

Spoiler (for your wellbeing): This episode includes mention of sexual assault. It is not detailed or graphic, but if that is a topic you don't want to engage with, skip this one. 

Kayla and Liz are back at it with The Menendez Brothers on Netflix this week. This case is a heavy one, but they dig in to the main points of the case before contemplating how they hope things would be different if this case were in 2025 instead of 1989. Also, they realize how weird and gross the media was in the 1990s when covering these kinds o...

Kayla and Liz take a break from murder to discuss the Netflix documentary, Sweet Bobby: My Catfish Nightmare. Catfishing cases are Liz's contemporary true crime fascination. They cover it all: Why do people catfish? How do people get away with catfishing for so long? Is catfishing a crime? Who is the victim? Do these people have jobs? Can you graduate from witness protection? What's the time difference between London and New York? 

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