Sideways
Survivors guilt
We discuss how feelings of unworthiness or unjustified luck can affect people in recovery when they see their peers lapse or die. We also consider how survivor guilt can be experienced in many other contexts related to mental health.
Daylight saving doesn't catch us out but does make us grumpy. I feel glad about insurance and Martin sings the praises of fried chicken.
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Metanoia
We tend to think of traumatic events and the most significant of life's challenges as unremittingly negative. But what emerges after an experience that feels as if it has destroyed us is an opportunity to rebuild.
We discuss, the opportunities that present themselves when we hit the bottom.
If that weren't enough, someone is assaulted with vegan mayo, Martin grateful for the opportunity to spend his weekend up a ladder, and I let myself down badly with the lack of knowledge on late 70s music.
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Building self trust
What makes us lose trust in ourselves, and how can we rebuild it once it's gone?
If you've lost faith in yourself as a result of addiction or any other mental health difficulty, we're here to help.
There's also biscuit talk, a new snake is discovered, and all your favourites.
It's good to be back.Â
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Holidays in recovery
Is it safe to go on holiday when you're in early recovery? What are the risks and how can you mitigate them? This week, we address these questions, and more.
We also wonder if headbanging has gone out of fashion, hear about how spreading consumables on the floor is art, and ask the question, 'what misfortune might prevent you from seeing rock band Uriah Heap?'
It's our last stop before the summer break so, pull up a sun lounger and join us.
Back in September. Thanks for sticking around. Big love to...
Feeling Hollow
What does a feeling of emptiness really mean? Does it indicate there's something seriously wrong, or can it be a point of punctuation and a sign you need a reset?
We also discuss paper planes, whether giraffes are good at maths, and feel grateful for footballers and trees.
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How to deliver bad news
Delivering bad news is something most of us find difficult, so you might find these tips on how to do it successfully quite useful.
We also explore the dangers of having an Only Fans account if you work in education, hear about a missing giraffe, and complain about World Cup kick off times.
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Compassion Fatigue
This week, we're talking about what happens when you allow your care for other people's emotional wellbeing to overshadow the need to take proper care of yourself.
There's also a lot of clothing related content, for some reason.
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Things to avoid saying to someone in recovery
This week we're talking about how to avoid unhelpful and disrespectful remarks to people in recovery, many of which say more about the person asking than they do about whoever happens to be the object of their enquiry.
A buffalo receives a reprieve due to his resemblance to a US president, and a wheelchair user gets an unwelcome shock, almost literally.
I got the title of the episode wrong in my recorded introduction so, sorry about that if you feel you've been misled.
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Social Loafing
This week, we're talking about how some of us make less effort when we think our contribution won't be noticed.
A man turns up in A&E with an unexploded bomb stuck in an unusual place, we discuss strange eating habits, and Martin gets a bit annoyed both about the sound quality of his recording and the way that tunes of hymns change when he is least expecting it
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The Ick
This week we're discussing the modern dating phenomenon that involved sudden revulsion at someone with whom you had been experiencing a romantic spark. I offer some theories about why it might have more to do with you than you realise.
We both remember disappointment at a fancy dress competition, reminisce about the Caroline roadshows of the 80s and, after a strong start, I disappoint again in the lyric quiz.
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Hugging
This week, we're discussing the benefits of physical touch, and why it can be such a useful component of recovery and good mental health more generally.
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DTD (Developmental Topographical Disorientation)
This week, we're talking about getting lost easily and how it can lead to unfair and painful levels of criticism.
A woman employs a counterintuitive way to address her debilitating anxiety, and I get angry about hot cross buns.
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Bigorexia
This week, we're talking about a less well-known form of body dysmorphia.
A man wakes up coloured blue and can't understand why, and there are despicable practices at the camel pageant. Â
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How To Live A Good LIfe
This week we're talking about the components that help us get the most from our lives.
A woman becomes unbelievably wealthy when buying a cup of coffee, there's underwear that measures 'flatus', I get the ick about something I can't recall, and there's more gratitude than you can shake a stick at.
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Why it's hard to escape from addiction
This week, we're trying to explain why so many people remain addicted to drink and drugs even when they can see how much damage it's doing.
A professional fighter gets his hair punched off, I witness a live drug deal whilst walking home from the shops, we display a pathetic level of knowledge about American sport, and wonder if the best place to find love might be along the aisles of a supermarket.
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How To be Kind
This week, we're talking about kindness, how to demonstrate more of it and what it feels like when we do.
We're recording on the first day of February which reminds of of violent traditions from childhood, and Martin has a story about physical assault with an unusual weapon.
We're back in our traditional roles this week which, in my case, inevitably includes a predictably poor performance on the lyric quiz.
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Dry January
This week, we have a look at the popular 'Dry January' campaign and consider the potential benefits and drawbacks it represents. We also discuss why long term recovery for dependent drinkers is not comparable with short-term behavioural programmes that appear to have similar aim but, in truth, diverge enormously.
We also hear about a man who chose an unusual disguise after wrongly being accused of a heinous crime, wonder about the wisdom of old men sporting ponytails, and remember the days when the GP would suggest you had a smoke to get rid of your chesty cough.<...
Tolerance v Acceptance
This week we're discussing the difference between tolerance and acceptance.
There's a drunk racoon, vaccination chat, and I am back to my usual disappointing worst in the lyric quiz.
There is also a single uttering of the f-word so, if you're easily offended, you might be better off with 'The One Show'.
Happy New Year.
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Frisson
This week we're talking about expereinces that move you unexpectedly.Â
I offer the example of a key change in a James Taylor song that moved me before realising that it doesn’t have a key change in it at all. It was the introduction of the string section at the beginning of the third verse which got me, but it's still a valid example I reckon.
In other news, Martin is still struggling with Christmas, there are literal hair-raising tales about riding a rollercoaster, and a woman gets a worm in her eyelid.
This...
Glimmers
This week, we're discussing an effective antidote to anything that triggers feelings of anxiety, stress, overwhelm or sadness.
Martin suggests some world records we can have a crack at, and there's some hygiene talk that involves dangerous soap and whether it's right to multitask whilst taking a shower.
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SAD - Seasonal Affective Disorder
This week we're talking about the way the shift in seasons and the changing of the clocks is a point in the year when many of us find our emotional resilience severely tested.
In other news, a bold double bluff doesn't work out, there are alarming developments on the toothpaste front, and we present a gratitude sandwich.
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Overexplaining
This week we're talking about the tendency to explain too much, a habit that emerges from insecurity in the explainer and often has little to do with the target of the explanation.
A plane is grounded as a result of flatulence, there's a squirrel on wheels, Martin frightens small children, and we debate the wisdom of letting a delivery driver use your toilet.
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Body Doubling
This week we're talking about an effective way of keeping yourself on track or reducing feelings of overwhelm when you're facing practical and/or emotional challenges.
We also feel grateful for seasonal joy and being fed.Â
There's some other nonsense too but I can't remember what it was about and I have a client in 10 minutes so I don't have time to check, and I've just realised that I haven't been including the normal intro with birdsong and all that paraphernalia. I'll do better next time.
Also, here's a link to the type o...
Shunishment
We're back!
This week, we're having a conversation about 'shunishment' which might be a word you've never heard of that describes manipulative and controlling behaviour in a relationship.
There's a new quiz, we're both surprisingly grateful for getting older, and some monkeys display questionable behaviour involving fermented fruit.
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Finding the right sponsor
This week we're discussing the red flags you might come across when you work with a sponsor in one of the fellowships and what you can do about it if it happens.
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Curiosity
This week, we're talking about why curiosity is important and how we, sometimes inadvertently, prevent ourselves from exercising it.
We hear about famous people carved from vegetables, and a man gives police an unwelcome gift when they put him under arrest.
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How To Remember What You Learn
This week, we're talking about how we forget most of what we learn and consider ways of improving retention.
Some friends, having messed with hallucinogens, mistakenly believe their companion to have died, and an elephant pops into a shop for some snacks.
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Overthinking
This week, we're talking about how we get in our own way by making things too complicated and failing to establish helpful strategies for getting stuff done.
I nearly burn myself alive with a BBQ, we ponder on what might make it worth being airlifted off a mountain (twice), and we're grateful for the same thing for different reasons.
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Self-nudging
This week, we're talking about how to avoid putting barriers up to prevent our own progress and how small incremental improvements add up to a lot.
There's also a man who gets shot by his dog, and gratitude for longevity and pizza ovens.
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Social Thinning
This week, we're talking about the early developmental experiences that might have a significant impact on your ability to establish and sustain relationships.
There's also a cautionary tale about carrying glazed windows on your head down Mill Street.
Apologies if the episode sounds a bit rough around the edges but we recorded it late, I'm trying to upload it before my first client, and I haven't even had a shower yet.
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Dealing with criticism
This week, we discuss the perils of slipping on fruit, fear of vending machines, and the joy of greenhouses and short trousers.
If that weren't enough, we devote the more serious segment of the episode to a discussion on ways to deal with destructive criticism and the behaviours that can replace it toward much happier outcomes.
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Meaning v Purpose
This week Martin has some wisdom related to the classic film, 'Citizen Kane'.
It's the first episode we've recorded while sitting in the same room for five years and, frankly, it was disturbing.
There's all the usual fun and frolics including the prematurely announced death of a Bulgarian footballer.
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Dealing with other peoples opinions
This week we're talking about how to keep your composure when someone tells you that Charlie Chaplin films are funny.
A mother steals ice cream from her child, who then gets the police involved, and a snake takes part in a heist and slithers off with some CBD oil.
Basically, it's more of the usual fare and, quite honestly, you'd be disappointed if it wasn't.
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Improving memory
This week we're talking about ways of boosting your brain so that you don't find it as hard to remember who had the best selling single in 1974 (Mud - Tiger Feet) and you can manage to churn out a podcast on a Sunday afternoon.
We also discuss the merits of a good apple, reminisce about reading maps, and I'm grateful for plasters.
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Body Clock
This week, we're investigating the circadian rhythm, cyber-farting, big bags of flour, and the joy of early morning light.
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Body Language
This week, we're talking about how much of our communication relies on what we do with our bodies.
There's all the usual guff but I can't be more specific than that because I'm in a rush.
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Alexithymia
This week we're discussing a neuropsychological condition that prevents individuals from expressing and identifying emotions.
We wonder why so many sports have what appears to be an unnecessary dress code, and wonder whether organisers had their priorities right when they allowed smoking and drinking in their events during the 80s whilst insisting the players wore specific clothing.
There's also an obese hedgehog who had to be put on a diet to protect him from predators.
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Sentimental value
This week, we're discussing the things that make us feel wistful and sentimental, even though they often have no intrinsic value other than the sentiment we attach to them.
Martin's discovery of a business selling diapers for festival goers makes us think about the difficulties of relieving yourself in a crowd. A man takes his pet turkey for a run, and I do appallingly on our weekly quiz.
Happy New Year.
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Living Alone
This week, we're discussing the benefits of living alone, especially for those in early recovery.
Over a cup of masala chai (me) we also cover shopping from bed (Martin), fake parades, how to stack the dishwasher, and whether it's OK to hide from carol singers.
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Envy
This week, we're discussing the unattractive emotion we feel when we covet something we see in someone else.
There's also chat on modern art, speed dating, having a cockroach named after you, and the wisdom of putting a chocolate orange in a pie.
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Thanks again for listening, we really appreciate it.