SEO F**king What - Get Found on Google and make money from your website with practical SEO tips

You're paying for SEO and not getting the results you want. Before you sack your SEO — ask yourself: are you the problem?

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington and in this episode of SEO Fucking What podcast I'm flipping the usual script. Instead of calling out dodgy agencies and cowboy SEOs, I'm looking at the other side of the relationship: the client. Because sometimes good SEO work goes completely to waste, and it's got nothing to do with the person doing the work.

I'll walk you through the seven habits that make you a dream SEO client — from...

SEO has been declared dead at least fifteen times since 1995. Fifteen. And it's still here.

In this episode I'm going back to the very beginning - 1993, 670 websites, celebrity names stuffed into meta keywords by people who genuinely believed all traffic is good traffic, the whole sorry mess - and walking you through every major "SEO is dead" moment in history, who caused it, who got destroyed by it, and what actually survived.

Because if you understand the pattern, you stop panicking every time a LinkedIn guru announces the next thing that's going to kill search.<...

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What” I focus on the harsh reality many business owners face: pouring hours into writing blog posts only to see:

A talk about solid SEO foundations, not just good writing, to ensure blog content gets found and drives results. Some common mistakes include; clever but unsearchable titles, missing metadata, weak or absent internal links, and lack of clear calls to action—that hold back otherwise strong content from ranking on Google.

You'll g...

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What” (the third and final part of the AI Website series) I pull back the curtain on why so many AI-built websites may look perfect on the surface yet fail spectacularly when it comes to SEO.

Drawing on 30 years of search experience and a recent audit of five B2B AI-generated sites, I explore the hidden problems lurking in headings, meta titles, robots.txt, sitemaps, schema, site performance, and trust signals—issues that even non-AI sites can suffer from if...

“Dave has half a story, no context, and excellent confidence. That’s what makes him dangerous.”

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What”, I’m talking about one of the most common and most exhausting problems in SEO — and it’s not algorithm updates, and it’s not technical debt. It’s Dave.

Dave means well. That’s the thing. He just went to a two-day digital marketing conference in Birmingham, sat through a keynote about AI search, and now he’s forwarding you articles at...

"She didn't need a content strategy document. She needed to read her inbox."

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I'm tackling one of the most common content problems I see — businesses that are constantly stuck on what to write next, when the answers have been sitting in their inbox, their reviews, and their sales call notes for years.

Here's what I'm covering:

"The thing about AI-built websites that the doom merchants don't want to admit — some of this stuff is really good. Not good for something a machine did, actually good, and in some cases better than I see on plenty of human-built sites."

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What”, this is Part Two of my AI Website series — and if you didn’t build your site with AI, don’t switch off. A lot of what I cover here applies to traditionally-built websites too.

I...

"AI can build your whole website in 10 minutes," they said. "Save a fortune," they said. And now you're wondering why nobody can find you on Google. Yeah. About that.

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO Fking What", I'm kicking off a three-part series on AI-built websites — why people are doing it, why I completely get it, and why I still think it's a fking bad idea if you don't understand what you're getting yourself into.

I also give you a quick homework task — a 30-second H1 c...

"Someone sitting in your LinkedIn DMs right now is offering you backlinks for 99. Someone else wants to charge you five a month for a robust link building campaign. And I'm here to tell you that for most small B2B service websites, both of them can fuck right off."

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What”, I'm calling out one of the most expensive myths in SEO — that spending money on backlinks is something small B2B service businesses need to do. It isn't. And I've g...

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I'm talking about the one bit of SEO that isn't a ranking factor but is absolutely the thing that decides whether anyone actually clicks on your listing — your meta descriptions. You've probably never written one, duplicated the same one across your whole site, or let Yoast bully you into stuffing it with keywords. All three are fucked.

Here's what I'm covering:

— Why your meta description isn't a ranking factor — but still decides whether anyone clicks

— Wh...

Your homepage H1 says “Welcome.” Your meta title says “Home.” And you’re wondering why Google won’t rank you. In this episode, Nikki Pilkington explains why H1s and meta titles are two different jobs, why making them identical is a missed opportunity, and why making them disconnected is actively killing your SEO.

You’ll learn how to think of your meta title as the promise and your H1 as the delivery, why “Helping your people thrive” is not a heading, why your company name almost certainly doesn’t belong in your H1, and why Yoast’s green smiley face is...

This week I've gone off script. Someone posted about an SEO conference billing itself as the UK's most advanced -- sixteen speakers, all male, not one woman on the bill. I said something about it. The response was, essentially, "we had women last year." And here we are.

This episode isn't about quotas or ticking boxes. It's about the fact that brilliant women in SEO exist, they're not hiding, and if your speaker lineup is sixteen mainly white men, the question you need to be asking is whether anyone actually went looking.

In this episode:<...

Your website could be full of brilliant content and still not rank. Why? Because Google can't figure out how your pages connect. That's what we're fixing today.

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I'm tackling one of the most overlooked parts of SEO — website structure. Not the sexy stuff. The stuff that actually makes your site work. How your pages connect, how Google moves around your site, and why getting this wrong means even your best content struggles to rank.

Here's what I...

When did you last actually read every page of your website? Not edit it, not skim it — read it like a visitor would. If the answer is “I can’t remember” or “never” — this episode is for you.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What”, I’m walking you through one of the most unglamorous but genuinely useful things you can do for your SEO — a content audit. Not to make your life miserable, but because Google crawls every single page on your website, and right now some of th...

I'm going to say something that's going to upset a lot of people who've been bragging about their rankings: being number one for a single word is fucking useless. There. I said it.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I'm calling out one of the most persistent and damaging myths in SEO — that keywords are either dead entirely, or that you should be obsessing over ranking for the shortest, broadest, most competitive terms possible. Both of these positions are bollocks, and I'm going to e...

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I’m talking about: the three free tools you need set up before any of the rest of it makes any sense. Because I cannot tell you how many times I've sat down with a business owner for an SEO one-to-one, asked them to share their Google Search Console, and found out they haven't logged in for 18 months. That's like having a sat nav and refusing to look at it, then wondering why you keep getting lost.

And...

I got sent an AI search optimisation audit that cost a business thousands of pounds. It was beautifully presented, full of charts and graphs, and packed with confident recommendations about AI citations and ChatGPT visibility.

It also missed a whole BUNCH of stuff.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I’m talking about: an audit that recommended deleting pages that were actively driving real traffic from Google — because a proprietary AI visibility tool said they weren't getting ChatGPT citations.

I'll b...

I'm sick of business owners coming to me convinced their competitors have some secret SEO strategy. They don't. You're just making it ridiculously easy for them to beat you by ignoring the fundamentals on your own website.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I’m talking about:

Most businesses aren’t bad at blogging because they’re lazy.

They’re bad at blogging because no one ever told them what blogs are actually for.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I’m talking about one of the biggest SEO mistakes I see every single week.

Business blogs that read like diaries, newsletters, or internal updates… and then the owner wonders why Google ignores them.

This is the episode your marketing agency probably won’t volunteer to s...

Most businesses aren’t confused about SEO because it’s complicated.

They’re confused because the industry keeps inventing new acronyms and pretending the rules have changed.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I’m talking about... well let's be honest... I'm having a bit of a rant. And it's a rant that you need to hear if you've fallen into the same trap I've seen some other SEOs fall into recently.

This is the episode your favourite SEO hustle bro...

Most businesses don’t lose their traffic because SEO “stopped working”.

They lose it because someone redesigned the website and didn’t know what they were doing.

Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I’m talking about website migrations, redesigns, domain changes, and how businesses accidentally torch years of SEO in a single launch.

This is the episode your controlling web developer probably doesn’t want you to hear.

In this episode, I cover:

Why website migrat...

Most small business owners don’t fail at SEO.

They get confused, overwhelmed, or quietly ripped off.

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of SEO F**king What, which is part two of a two parter, I’m letting you know what a good SEO person looks like in terms of their offers.

What SEO really costs in the UK, how long it takes to work, and how to spot legitimate professionals from cowboys.

No jargon.

No “it depends” nonsense.

No mag...

Ever been quoted some ridiculous SEO retainer and thought… hang on, what the f**k am I actually paying for? Yeah. Same as lots of my clients. And honestly, I’m tired of watching small businesses get fleeced by agencies who talk a big game but can’t explain a single thing they’re doing.

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of SEO F**king What, I’m breaking down the biggest red flags in SEO.

Guaranteed rankings. “Secret” methodologies. Vague contracts. The lot.

If you’ve ever fe...

I’ve lost count of the businesses that hire an SEO expert, pay good money, and then make it impossible for us to actually do the job.

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of SEO F**king What, I’m calling out the ridiculousness I sometimes see when a business hires an SEO. Not you. You wouldn't do any of this, I'm sure. But we'll explore some of the absolute sh*ttery that can go down when one of us SEO experts gets hired by someone who doesn't understand what...

In this episode I’m taking on one of the most annoying lies in the SEO world. You’ve probably heard it. “SEO isn’t really for businesses your size.” Yeah. That's total bullshit.

Someone asked me about it on LinkedIn and honestly, I could feel my blood pressure rising.

So I’m breaking down why small businesses keep getting fobbed off by big agencies and why it has nothing to do with SEO… and everything to do with profit.

I talk through the real reasons you’re being dismissed and then walk you through what...

Ever handed over a chunk of cash to your web designer for “SEO” and ended up with nothing but a plugin and a lot of empty promises?

Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of SEO F**king What, I’m pulling back the curtain on what really happens when web designers say they do SEO—and how you can tell if you’ve been stitched up.

I’ll walk you through the fixes and explain why most web designers aren’t SEO experts (and why that’s not a dig at the...

Fed up with watching charlatans and self-proclaimed “AI SEO gurus” rake in cash and followers by selling absolute bollocks? Yeah, me too.

 This is SEO Fu*king What. I'm Nikki, and I help business owners like you to get found in search and make money from your website

In this no-bullshit episode, I’m explaining:

If you care about sustainable SEO that actually ran...

LinkedIn told you to sack your SEO tools and just use ChatGPT. Cute.

 This is SEO Fu*king What. I'm Nikki, and I help business owners like you to get found in search and make money from your website

In this episode, I break down the three biggest ChatGPT SEO myths — fake volumes, fantasy Keyword Density (KD), and imaginary competitor analysis. I also give you a budget-savvy playbook that actually works: using GSC, manual SERPs and free tools.

And I share exactly where AI belongs (and where it doesn’t).

Click play t...

Hey hey. It’s Nikki, and welcome to "SEO F*%king What", the no-bullshit podcast about getting your website found in Google by the people who actually want to buy from you - without the wanky advice the LinkedIn gurus are peddling.

If you’ve ever spent hours crafting a blog post only for Google to completely ignore it, this episode is exactly what you need.

I'll be slicing through the usual SEO myths and explain why your posts aren’t ranking - and more importantly, how to fix it fast.

This episode will h...

Hey hey, it’s Nikki, and welcome to "SEO F*%king What". This is the podcast where I cut through the bollocks and give you the real advice you need to get your website found (and making money) on Google.

In this episode, “Who Owns Your SEO Shlt,” I’m talking about something that’s been pissing me off for years: the sneaky way agencies and freelancers end up owning your entire Google presence without you even knowing it.

Over three decades working in digital marketing, I’ve seen businesses spend thousands on Google Ads, Analytics, a...

Welcome to "SEO Fucking What," the podcast that cuts through the bullshit and tells it straight, with no wanky jargon and no panic-peddling.

I’m Nikki, here to help you make damn real money from your website by showing up on Google, not by falling for shiny new courses or scare tactics from so-called LinkedIn gurus.

In today’s very first episode, we're tackling the biggest scam floating around the digital marketing scene: the tired claim that "SEO is dead."

So grab your coffee (and maybe cover your ears if you’re sensitive to swe...

SEO F**king What is coming to your favourite podcast app. Are you ready for it? The "SEO Is Dead" Bros certainly aren't...