Mixed Race Belonging
The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism. Hosted by Raina LaGrand, a somatic coach for mixed race people with a background as a trauma therapist, yoga teacher, and health educator. Episodes released mostly weekly.
45. The Cost of Being "Low Maintenance" When You're Worried As A Mixed Race Person Who Learned to Avoid Being “Too Much” By Over-Accommodating Everyone Else
As a mixed kid, you might have had a lot of emotional needs go unmet – whether from family who didn’t know what to say, friends who couldn’t adequately mirror your reality back to you, or teachers who didn’t know how to handle monoracist comments from your classmates. All of this caused you to internalize thoughts that you were "too much," "needed too much," or were "not enough."
In today's episode, I'm talking about the cost of letting that mentality lead in your current relationships.
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44. How I’d Help You Express Your Needs, Feelings, and Boundaries Without Questioning If It’s OK to Have Them
Expressing your needs, feelings, and boundaries can be a daunting task when you’ve spent your whole life reading the room and adjusting yourself around it. Here’s how I help my clients do so with confidence and clarity.
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Book your free call to talk about how my 1:1 coaching program, Bold Belonging, can help you build an intentional support circle of at least 3 chosen family in 16 weeks - even if you’re afraid of being “too much.”
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43. Three Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Overcommit Just Because You Feel Like You "Should"
If you tend to say yes to every request you get from your family and friends, only to feel overstretched and full of regret when the time comes to follow through, you probably aren’t slowing down enough to actually check in with yourself and make an informed decision.
In this episode, I’m walking you through a BRAND NEW framework I designed to help a real-life client be more intentional with their commitments.
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Book your free call to talk about how my 1:1 coaching program, Bold Belonging, can help you build an intentional suppor...
42. You Understand Boundaries - So Why Do You Continually Back Pedal on Your Own?
You’re overwhelmed. You’re dying for help, but afraid to ask for it. And yet, you say yes every time someone asks you for something, only to deeply regret it later when your nervous system is fried the fuck out.
You’ve read all the bestselling books and listened to all the podcasts on boundaries. Why can’t you shake these patterns?
In this episode, I’m sharing why you keep saying yes even though your body is screaming-crying no, how being mixed influences these habits, and how you can finally get more comfortable expressing...
41. How You Respond to Microaggressions is Way Less Important Than This
If you’re wondering exactly what you should say when someone microaggresses you or dismisses you, you’re asking the wrong question. In this week’s episode, I’m sharing what’s more important than crafting the perfect clap back. Tune in and let me know what you think!
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40. Critical Multiracial Consciousness with Dr. Victoria Malaney-Brown
How does political consciousness around monoracism influence how mixed race people perceive themselves, experience life, and choose to engage or disengage from social justice causes? In this episode, I interview Dr. Victoria Malaney-Brown about her life as a mixed race person and mother, and her work as an educator, college success coach, consultant, and researcher on multiracial consciousness.
Dr. Malaney-Browns Reading Raina-bow Recommendations:
Multiracial Identity and Racial Politics in the United States by Natalie Masuoka
Race Policy and Multiracial Americans by Kathleen Odell Korgen
The Awakened Family: A Revolution in Parenting...
39. Hybridized Spiritualities with Camila Knigge Unibe
How can mixed race people embrace a hybridized approach to culture, spirituality, and ancestral connection? In this episode, I interview Camila Knigge Unibe, a graduate student in Ethnic Studies at San Francisco State University, an artist, a curator, and a K-12 educator, whose work is driven by her belief in the inevitable liberation of all living beings. If you’ve been hungry for a deeper sense of spirituality, but unsure where to start, this is a great episode for you.
Camila’s Reading Raina-bow Recommendations:
Tending Grief: Embodied Rituals for Holding Our Sorrow and Growing Cult...
38. Identities, Unbelonging, & Solidarities with Gayatri Sethi
When does the quest for belonging become another way to bypass power and oppression? What might actually be more important than belonging? Is identity the best way to build belonging? These are some of the questions I explore in today’s episode with guest Gayatri Sethi, author of Diaspora-ish: Notes on Identities, Unbelonging, & Solidarities. Tune in for this paradigm-shifting conversation and don’t forget a notebook – there’s lots of gems you’ll want to write down.
Learn more about Gayatri and where you can buy her phenomenal book here.
Gayatri's Reading Raina-bow suggestions:
When We Ar...37. Feeling Whole Starts with Feeling Held
Feeling whole as a mixed person does not start with the perfect description of your identity, it starts with a body that feels held. As a mixed person, you might not have felt held by anyone, anywhere, which has amplified the impulse to describe yourself in fractions, hide aspects of your personality, or avoid social situations altogether. But the truth is that most humans lack the experience of feeling held. In today’s episode, I’m talking about the colonial roots of feeling existentially unheld, the unique impact on mixed race people, and how somatics can help you finally find...
36. Multicentriçism with Chiyuki Shannon and Friends
This is a special episode because it's a group discussion with mixed elder and founder of the Multicentric Institute, Chiyuki Shannon, and other mixed community leaders, Bee Barba-Padilla, T Barba-Padilla, Lili Stiefel, and Preston Locklear.
In this episode, we discuss Multicentriçism, which describes the worldview of mixed-race, minoritized individuals who come from split genetic, philosophical, and cultural frames of reference; who think, communicate, and access information from more than one frame of reference at the same time without confusion, utilizing multiple levels of sensitivity transmission.
Listen in for this stimulating conversation and let us k...
35. What People With Strong Relationships Aren't Afraid To Do
People with stronger relationships and a deeper sense of community aren't lucky or cooler than you. In this episode, I'm breaking down some of the key factors that differentiate people who feel connected from those who are more isolated.
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Sign up for the Mixed Race Belonging Collective and join us on July 12th for the first Belonging Building Blocks workshop.
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Answer my belonging survey and let me know what you wanna hear on the pod.
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Welcome to the Mixed Ra...
34. Are You Seeing Red Flags Where There Are None?
If you’re primarily measuring your friendships based on whether your friends completely understand you, agree with you, or meet your every need all the time, you might be missing out on meaningful relationships.
In this episode, I share a personal story about something a friend said to me about mixed people that could have easily triggered me, and how somatics has helped me pause and ground myself before throwing a way a perfectly good relationship.
PLUS I share how I can help you develop the same skills and capacity to actually feel closer to pe...
33. Do You Have a Mixed Race Belonging Wound?
Do you find yourself opting out of cultural spaces because you might be seen as an imposter? Avoiding getting involved in movement work because you're not sure if you deserve to be there? Afraid to be vulnerable in your relationships, and stuck on surface level?
If so, you might have what I call the Mixed Race Belonging Wound. In this episode I talk about that wound, where it comes from, how it impacts you, and how the Mixed Race Belonging Collective can help you heal and build relationships where you actually feel seen.
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<...32. Roots, Rights, and Responsibilities of Being Mixed Black
Blackness is one of the most surveilled and policed identities in the United States, which means that being a mixed person with Black heritage comes with a unique set of challenges – and opportunities. In this episode, I sit down with my mentor, elder, book coach, and friend TaRessa Stovall to discuss how to navigate Black culture as a mixed Black person, particularly if you didn’t grow up deeply embedded in Black culture. If you’ve ever wondered, am I Black enough?, this episode is for you.
Learn more about TaRessa Here and subscribe to her Substack, Mixed...
31. Both/And/All with Sarah Lotus Garrett of Mixed Bloom Room
Every mixed identity is unique. Not only are there infinite mixes possible, but you also have additional intersecting identities that can make your lived experience equally special and challenging to navigate. In today’s episode, I talk with my friend, colleague, and mixed elder Sarah Lotus Garrett from Mixed Bloom Room, about the both/and/all-ness of being mixed.
Today’s episode kicks off a series of interviews on mixed identity and belonging with folks from my own mixed community – and a few special guests whose brains I wanted to pick and are new friends! Stay tuned for mo...
30. 'What Are You?' and Other Microaggressions Experienced by Mixed Race People
If you had a dollar for every time somebody asked you, “what are you?”... you'd probably be rich!
You are no stranger to microaggressions as a biracial or multiracial person. In today's episode, I'm sharing different categories of microaggressions that have been extensively studied and named by Critical Mixed Race Studies scholars.
If you find yourself feeling frozen or spiraling when these interactions happen, make sure you snag a copy of my new FREE 'What Are You?' Somatic Recovery Guide for mixed race people. Inside, you'll learn how to respond to and recover from bein...
29. Your Identity isn't Complicated - It's Complex
You try to make yourself make sense to other people by describing yourself in fractions (e.g. I'm half Black and half Filipina) … but then you’re disappointed and you feel unseen when someone says that you’re only half or you’re not fully something. In this episode, I'm talking about how to embrace the complexity of your identity and stop worrying about if you make sense to other people.
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Answer my belongi...
28. The Worst Part About Feeling Like You Don't Belong is What That Feeling is Holding You Back From
What would you do - who would you be - if you didn't feel so held back by your fears and insecurities about being mixed? The trauma of monoracism can cause you to anticipate rejection around every corner, holding you back from showing up bravely and authentically in the world. But when you're able to acknowledge your fears without being driven by them, you're able to see a more full picture of reality - one where your drive for self-protection doesn't obscure your longing for connection and community.
Tune in and learn how holding your complexity can...
27. An Invitation for Belonging: The Elevate Your Impact Summit for Multiracial Changemakers
Navigating the professional world as a mixed person has always had its challenges, but with growing racial tensions it can feel even more isolating. That’s why Dr. Hayley Haywood, of Elevating Access, has created the Elevate Your Impact Summit - an “un-conference” just for multiracial changemakers. On today’s show, Dr. Haywood talks to us about why she created the summit and what you can expect.
Registration closes THURSDAY APRIL 30th, and tickets are pay-what-you-can. Claim your ticket here.
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Welcome to the Mixed Race Belonging podcast, where we explore the intersection of mixed iden...
26. One Reason It's So Hard to Find Relationships Where You Actually Feel Seen and What You Can Do About It
If you constantly feel like you can’t find ANY friendships where you actually feel seen you might have internalized this to mean that you’re too different to fit in or make sense to other people, but there might be something else going on… In today’s episode, I’m talking about what that is, and what you can do to actually build more fulfilling relationships.
If you want to do this work in community with other mixed folks, sign up for Mixed Race Belonging Collective where you can learn somatic skills to help you feel more conne...
25. How I Make the Mixed Race Belonging Collective Feel Like A Real Community
In today’s episode I’m talking about how I create a real community feel in the Mixed Race Belonging Collective and I invite you to join us Sunday April 12th for the Welcome Retreat, a laid back space to get to know each other with just enough structure so that we’re not all looking at each other wondering wtf to talk about. Doors are always open for the Collective – sign up today and join us for the retreat on Sunday!
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Welcome to the Mixed Race Belonging podcast, where we explore the intersection of mixed iden...
24. I used to believe everyone needed 1:1 therapy. Here’s what changed my mind.
Psychotherapy can go a LONG way when you need one-on-one support, but sometimes what you really need is community and an opportunity for collective healing. In this episde, I’m talking briefly about how I realized mixed race people needed more spaces for collective healing and how the Mixed Race Belonging Collective can help!
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Welcome to the Mixed Race Belonging podcast, where we explore the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through rela...
23. Introducing...The Mixed Race Belonging Collective
Welcome to the Mixed Race Belonging podcast, where we explore the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, a somatic coach for mixed race people with a background as a trauma therapist, yoga teacher, and health educator.
The tools and insights I share with you here are the approach that has not only helped me heal my belonging wound, but also he...
22. Get the Most Out of Belonging Building Blocks with the Buddy System!
In today’s episode I talk with Katy about her experience participating in the Buddy System, which is an optional component of Belonging Building Blocks. Hear how this helped Katy get even more out of the program.
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Learn the three-step somatic strategy that will help you feel safe and secure in your body and your relationships as a mixed person (even if you’ve never truly felt held by anyone) when you sign up for the Belonging Blueprint workshop TONIGHT, February 24th 5:30-7pm ET.
During the workshop registration will open up for Belong...
21. How Belonging Building Blocks Helped Two of My Clients Have More Fulfilling Relationships
In today's episode, I'm sharing with you how my Belonging Building Blocks program helped Katy go from settling to bravely taking steps towards more fulfilling relationships and Jas go from feeling unfulfilled in her relationship to feeling secure and satisfied with her partners care. These are two powerful stories of many to come out of BBB!
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Learn the three-step somatic strategy that will help you feel safe and secure in your body and your relationships as a mixed person (even if you’ve never truly felt held by anyone) when you sign up for the Belo...
20. We Belong to the Land: A Conversation with Belonging Building Blocks Guest Speaker, Maribel Ramirez
Join me for a conversation with the very wise Maribel Ramirez for a conversation on attachment, trauma, indigeneity, mixed identity, and belonging. Maribel will be a guest speaker in my Belonging Building Blocks program that starts on March 15!
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Learn the three-step somatic strategy that will help you feel safe and secure in your body and your relationships as a mixed person (even if you’ve never truly felt held by anyone) when you sign up for the Belonging Blueprint workshop on February 24th.
During the workshop registration will open up for Belonging Building Bloc...
19. How Somatics Can Help Restore Your Body's Blueprint for Belonging
In today's episode, I talk about how belonging - feeling held - is a somatic and emotional memory that you can cultivate through personal somatic practice and your relationship with others who DO see you. You'll learn how somatics can help you restore your neurobiological wiring for connection and belonging.
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Learn the three-step somatic strategy that will help you feel safe and secure in your body and your relationships as a mixed person (even if you’ve never truly felt held by anyone) when you sign up for the Belonging Blueprint workshop on February 24th 5:30-7pm...
18. Two Mental Traps Distracting You From Finding Belonging As a Mixed Person
In today's episode, I'm talking about how the lifelong experience of being rejected and othered keeps you trapped in a state of hypervigilance and how that's BOTH protecting you from harm AND preventing you from feeling like you belong.
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Learn the three-step somatic strategy that will help you feel safe and secure in your body and your relationships as a mixed person (even if you’ve never truly felt held by anyone) when you sign up for the Belonging Blueprint workshop on February 24th 5:30-7pm ET [NOTE: the duration of this workshop is longer than...
17. A Message for Mixed Folks with White Moms
Mixed folks - especially women-identified mixed folks - have been getting HEAT on the internet lately. In this episode, I've got a special message for mixed folks with white moms.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you go deep to untangle, unpack, and get to the root of your belonging wound, so you can finally feel whole and write the next chapter of your belonging story.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, a so...
16. How to Reconcile Your Proximity to Whiteness
In this episode, I'm speaking on a topic that I think we sometimes shy away from - how do mixed folks with white ancestors/parents/family members reconcile their proximity to whiteness? I'm breaking down how to handle the fact that you have white ancestors or are assumed to be white, and how to find a place of centered accountability when it comes to your privilege and access.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you...
15. My Client Was Worried They Were Appropriating Their Own Culture...Here's How I Helped Them
In today's episode I share how I supported a client who wanted to reconnect with their Taino culture, but worried they would be appropriating it. I also speak to how healing connecting to our ancestral indigenous cultures can be during such disturbing times.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you go deep to untangle, unpack, and get to the root of your belonging wound, so you can finally feel whole and write the next chapter...
14. Why Trying to Regulate Yourself is Keeping You From Feeling Connected to Other People
In this week's episode, I'm breaking down why nervous system "regulation" pop psychology is problematic AF - and why dysregulation is actually important for building relationships.
Sign up for the FREE 60 minute Somatics of Belonging workshop. We’re live on January 12th from 5:30-6:30pm ET.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host...
FREE Workshop on January 12th: The Somatics of Belonging
I'm out of office this week but popping in with a quick announcement!
Sign up for the FREE 60 minute Somatics of Belonging workshop. We’re live on January 12th from 5:30-6:30pm ET.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, a somatic coach for mixed race people with a background as a t...
13. Describing Yourself in Fractions is Holding You Back From Feeling Like You Belong
In this week's episode I'm here to remind you that you are WHOLE and that your identity is NOT complicated. I talk complexity theory, river confluences, and more.
Sign up for the FREE 60 minute Somatics of Belonging workshop. We’re live on January 12th from 5:30-6:30pm ET.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your...
12. The Role of Grief in Healing Your Mixed Belonging Wound
When it comes down to it, the mixed belonging wound is really grief. In today's episode, I'm covering what grief is, how it interacts with your mixed race belonging wound, and why we're all so afraid of it in the first place.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, a somatic co...
11. How can I tell the difference between whether something is really a red flag or if I'm just triggered?
I'm answering a common question that comes up in my work - is this a red flag or am I just triggered? I'll walk you through some considerations and how you can practice building your capacity to discern for yourself.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, an embodiment coach for mi...
10. What TF even is belonging?
It can feel kind of elusive to identify what belonging is. In today's episode, I'm sharing the major themes I've identified from the 30+ books and counting that I've read about belonging. Want the book list?
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, an embodiment coach for mixed race people with a ba...
9. Handle family conflict this holiday season without losing your sh*t!
A timely episode as many of you head to family time for T-Day. I share skills and insights on how to handle though family dynamics and conflict, as well as some words of encouragement. Hope it helps!
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m your host, Raina LaGrand, an embodiment coach for mixed race people wi...
8. Should You Stay Friends With Someone Who Doesn't Understand Your Multicultural Identity?
In this episode I answer a question I got on Instagram - should I stay friends with someone who doesn't understand, questions, or denies my multicultural identity? I speak broadly about whether to stay friends with people who challenge you or not, as well as what you can try if you do want to salvage the relationship.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through...
7. Stop Self-Selecting Out of Affinity Spaces!!
Do you self-select out of monoracial or affinity spaces because you assume you won't be welcome? If so, this episode is for you. I'm offering some words of wisdom on why you absolutely have a right to put yourself in those spaces and why you belong in them.
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The Mixed Race Belonging podcast explores the intersection of mixed identity and belonging through the lens of somatics and personal and collective liberation to help you heal your belonging wounds and reconnect with your innate wholeness through relationships, new experiences, and activism.
I’m yo...
