Really Useful Therapy: Another way to look at things

In this episode, Tamara and Nancy focus on the internal "noise" that is present and often linked to external events outside the realm of our control.

What makes change so hard? In this episode, Nancy and Tamara discuss some of the components of change that make is so uncomfortable, as well as some of the strengths we develop through changes we make. 

Peace at the moment may feel elusive and hard to come by right about now.  We discuss ways to create both external and internal peace amidst global and local events that are always changing.  

Tamara and Nancy have a discussion about how anger can be not only useful, but also transformative.

More on creating connection with others.

As the year comes to a close, Tamara and Nancy reflect on the importance of pausing and reviewing what ended and what is yet to begin.

We all have some experience in "pushing through" uncomfortable feelings when we are ill or out of sorts, but what do we do with a more chronic situation like depression?   

Most everyone longs for connection and a sense of belonging. If that's the case, why are so many people feeling lonely? What makes building friendships and relationships so hard? This episode explores some of the barriers to creating connection with others.

Tamara and Nancy answer your questions.

Tamara and Nancy answer more of the questions you've submitted. This episode explores the emotions clients experience in therapy, including the tender, sometimes surprising feelings of love toward their therapist.

Discussion about EMDR.  Thoughts on who it might be useful for and the reasons for doing attachment and identity work prior to doing EMDR to improve the results.

Self-care is the practice of intentionally taking action to maintain or improve your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.  

Creativity and transformation are deeply intertwined. Creativity fuels transformation by imagining new possibilities, reshaping ideas, and redefining boundaries. Whether in art, science, personal growth, or societal change, creativity is the spark that initiates transformation.

Understanding how alleviating depression may be less focusing on "figuring out" what is bothering us and more on creating energy, action and self-expression as an antidote for healing.  

Happiness and depression might seem like polar opposites, but emotions are more complex than just being on opposite ends of a spectrum. 

Someone struggling with depression doesn’t necessarily feel sad all the time; they might feel numb, empty, or disconnected from things they once enjoyed. And happiness isn’t just the absence of sadness. The discussion centers around ways to understand and nurture a sense of contentment that can exist even when life experiences are not ideal.  

Setting boundaries can be tough, especially when others resist or when it stirs up discomfort. But it’s also a vital part of self-care. 

The challenge often comes from guilt or fear of conflict, but remember: boundaries are not about controlling others, they're about taking care of yourself. Whether it's saying "no" without over-explaining, limiting energy-draining interactions, or protecting your time, it's all about ensuring that you’re not sacrificing your well-being.

In a follow up to Episode 10, Tamara and Nancy talk about applying grit to larger life issues which requires a different type of courage; being scared, but doing it anyway.  

Taking unknown risks means stepping into uncertainty with courage, embracing the possibility of failure while trusting in growth, adventure, and the potential for success. It's about choosing to move forward despite not having all the answers.     This simple act—buying a ticket, stepping onto the train—is more than movement; it’s a doorway to possibility. What do you intend to create?            

Would it surprise you to know doing hard things involves the paradox of having both strength and the willingness to not look strong? Join Tamara and Nancy as they discuss how persistence, grit and vulnerability can work together.

Rolling with changes can mean adjustments to our usual way of doing things, but habits die hard. Maybe the way we've done things for years isn't the best way to do it now. How do we decide what, when, why and how to change anything in our lives?

Living at a time when uncertain events are occurring daily can make things feel unstable and maybe even scary. How do we get through this when everything feels like it's falling apart and things are so unpredictable?

All of us, as human beings, understandably need to have some type of expectations to guide our lives. What happens though when that yardstick of measurement is too narrow? 

For Dr. Who fans (aka proud nerds) there is a famous quote that states "in the end we are all stories, just make it a good one."  The stories told about us, to us and that we tell ourselves shape us and our identity.  We may be living out of stories or "narratives" that are not our own and that don't serve us.  Our job is to discover the unconscious stories playing out in our lives and reauthor or rewrite them in a way that gives us spiritual freedom and mental autonomy.  

The metaphor of art and creation is valuable in psychology.  Why is it some artwork is really appealing to some and not as much for others.  When we change the light, add colors, change the materials used and the textures, an art piece suddenly is transformed in some way and is perceived differently.  Our minds are no different.  How we decide to let in light, color and creativity has the power to "reframe" a life experience into something that provides transcendence of a previously painful experience into something that becomes useful and makes us who we are.  

Human beings are multi-faceted, much like a prism that takes in light from different angles.  How well we use all of our senses to understand something shapes our perception of it and others.  Using only part of our senses and neglecting others narrows our view or experience.  Allowing our minds to function in an expansive way helps make connections that broaden our idea of what is possible in ourselves and others.      

Changing our focus can bring different meaning to previous and present experiences.  If we live life with a belief and a set of expectations that we will be "happy" if things go the way we want, we have already set up a metric for success we have no control over.  We can hope things turn out a certain way, but as we all know, there are no guarantees.  Nurturing an attitude or stance toward life that invites flexibility in what we decide to be aware of gives us a better foundation on which to build emotional wellness.  

Coming from a space of assuming you are broken can color the way you create your life and limit the opportunities you allow yourself to embrace.  This episode is about finding the growth even in your toughest experiences and pulling meaning and purpose from them.

Two seasoned mental health professionals reflect on a variety of topics integral in their therapy work with others across the years.  Discussion touches on research and academic theory but primarily focuses on anecdotal stories of what we have learned about the universality of being human and ultimately the importance of relationship both in therapy and in life.