Opie & Carl

A black man gets the world’s third penis transplant — from a white donor — and now they have to tattoo it. Opie, Carl Ruiz, and Sherrod Small cannot leave it alone. Mike Vecchione swings by before Jimmy Fallon. Dr. Steve calls in with the actual medical details. Then Carl finds out Opie left his Yeti birthday gift at the studio. Unfiltered Opie & Carl. This is the episode. Subscribe for more.

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Opie, Mark Normand, and Carl Ruiz turn the studio into a complete circus. Carl fat-fingers his wife’s smoking-hot pics to everyone (including Roland), the group immediately loses their minds, then they dial her up while she’s out with the kids. Cue nonstop roasting, zipline boob stories, Mark being Mark, ancient radio chaos with a Tourette’s guy jumping to “Jump Around,” IPA hate, cheap beer nostalgia, Memphis BBQ talk, and the most unhinged birthday episode you’ll hear all year. Raw, filthy, and stupidly funny — pure Opie Radio chaos

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Jim Florentine tells Opie and Carl he waited until 18 to have sex because of Catholic hell, then immediately jerked off after. He also missed softball playoffs with bursitis from his right arm. Opie let a shaman blow Peruvian plant powder up both nostrils until he puked and saw his dead dad. Then they go full strip-club war stories and torch Netflix, late night, and cancel culture. 


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Jim Florentine walks into Opie and Carl’s tiny new studio for the first time since Opie got fired and immediately starts cooking. Lightning delays at a Dolphins game, falling off stadium ramps, ketchup as liquid sugar, grandpa beers vs. IPAs that taste like feet, prenups you can never bring up in Rome, Carl giving away the restaurant to stay free and clear, and Jim’s special I Got the House. Then it gets real: the shaman in an LA condo who said the exact words from his ex’s suicide note, Catholic guilt, support groups, and why he flew across...

Carl is maxed out in the creepy cabin. The town is a disaster. The seawall is breached. The girls at the bar have gone from “Hi Carl” to “Hey Carl.” So he times his TV appearance, walks into the bar, points at the screen, and walks out with a 7.5 in her late 20s. No prep. No Blue Chew. Lost it on entry. Then he has to redeem himself… and the next morning they walk a quarter-mile down a country road past four towns of firefighters who all know him because the house across the street just burned down. Opie, Carl, and Jim Fl...

Opie’s birthday turns into pure chaos with Carl Ruiz (the Mad Cuban, Food Network star) and comedian Mark Normand. Carl recounts Roland’s legendary 30-second bathroom fart + the time he was spooked by every truck on the drive to Nashville. Mark goes full degenerate mode with wild Vegas stories: downtown Fremont debauchery, roulette wins/losses, the greatest buffet on earth, and those magical hangover IV drips. Plus Yeti gift roasting, Trump calling terrorists “evil losers,” fidget spinner rants, Ryan Seacrest’s Ghost blunder, and nonstop unfiltered banter. One of the funniest, most unhinged episodes yet.If you love raw comedy pod...

Carl is out in California taping Guy's Grocery Games on the Food Network with Guy Fieri. Opie heads to Irving Plaza in NYC to go backstage with the band, Blackberry Smoke! They talk about the road, life, and some of the biggest rock and southern rock acts in the  world. Plus, we have exclusive "live" material from the band!  

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Carl rocks his Chicken Nugget Scientist shirt andplans an over-the-top private plane trip to Vegas/Miami complete with strip clubs and swim-up pools. DJ Who Kid drops by, the guys roast Katy Perry’s SNL flop, avocado lattes, kids birthday parties, and Opie’s questionable fashion. Pure chaos and laughs.


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Carl’s back from the family road trip to Memphis in May BBQ Championship and he did NOT hold back. Sherrod Small in studio as Carl spills on 17-hour drives with angry-wife speeding, tricking the kids with alligator “chicken fingers,” Bass Pro Shops pyramid fishing, getting blackout on blue Hawaiian fishbowl drinks, Winner’s Row BBQ with Michelin-star pitmasters, and the unsettling VIP Graceland tour where Elvis is buried in the backyard. Grateful Dead doc talk + Southern pie debates included. Absolute chaos.

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Carl’s off living the Food Network life, so Opie does what he does best: hits the streets of Bay Ridge with Yannis Pappas while Chris Distefano sits in the chair getting a haircut. What follows is pure walking-around chaos — ice coffee runs, emergency pee-cup planning, old-school radio war stories, Louis CK debates, and two guys just shooting the shit with zero filter while their friend gets lines cut into his head. No studio. No rules. Just the exact messy street hang the Opie & Carl audience lives for.

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While Carl Ruiz is off living his best Food Network life, Opie hits the streets of Brooklyn with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas… and somehow ends up getting a haircut in the most old-school Bay Ridge barbershop imaginable. Expect pure chaos: a neighborhood legend who walks around in a full suit every day, debates about thinning hair and comb-overs, a guy sharpening an alarming number of pencils, the return of “The Duv,” Opie admitting he hasn’t worn shoes in three months, and the kind of random, unfiltered nonsense that only happens when these three are left unsupervised. This is Opie & C...

​"You have to let it fester."
​Welcome back to a heavy-hitting episode from the Best of the Last Year of Radio series. Opie is joined in-studio by the late, great Carl Ruiz and the hilarious Sherrod Small and boxing legend Gerry Cooney for a session that perfectly captures the raw, unfiltered chemistry of this era.
​We’re diving deep into the archives to bring you the stories that defined the "Last Year." From the absurdity of bringing a gaming console to a Vegas bachelor party to the "Jedi Mind Trick" Carl used to navigate the world of high-end strip cl...

Stacy shows up with enough booze and Benton’s ham to start a small war, Vic gets emotional over Alabama barbecue, Carl nearly throws hands over ice-cream sandwiches, and the whole studio turns into a drunken food orgy while they roast Comey, Putin’s hockey goals, Little People Big World drama, and every TV personality they hate. Pure chaos. Bring a napkin… and maybe a designated driver.


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Carl’s off playing Food Network star, so Opie ditches Manhattan for a sweaty Brooklyn stroll with Chris Distefano… and immediately runs into Yannis. What follows is pure chaos: $8 smoothie flirting, American-flag purity tests, limp-dick philosophy, haunted Long Island death houses, sage-vs-ghosts debates, and a pilgrimage to an actual mobbed-up barber shop while everyone’s dripping sweat and questioning their ancestry. History Hyenas energy, zero chill.


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Opie survives 2.5 hours of traffic hell, nearly pees in a Gatorade bottle, and storms Chris Distefano’s brand-new (completely empty, aggressively gray) Bay Ridge apartment. Cue the classic Islanders edible meltdown story, a smoothie-shop flirt mission, a judge-roasting speeding-ticket lie, fire-escape paranoia, and a neighborhood stroll that somehow involves Chinese soup, Revolutionary War graves, and Yannis. Pure chaos. Pure Bay Ridge.


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Stacy brought in the moonshine, so you know things got off the rails fast. Opie joined by the legendary Carl Ruiz, Vic Henley, and Sherrod Small for an afternoon of pure, unfiltered comedy.​We’re drinking "shine," laughing our asses off, and roasting each other as only we can. From Vic losing his wallet, Opie can sh*t anywhere, Carl says India sucksr and Opie's WILD Fraternity stories, this is the crew at their absolute best—raw, loud, and incredibly funny. Grab a drink and hang out with us.

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A heartfelt tribute to Gary of Ubon's Barbecue, the legendary pitmaster, storyteller, and friend of the show. Hear his hilarious jokes, wild stories, and that unforgettable blues singing. The comedy world lost a real one. 


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Carl Ruiz is forced to drive 17 hours to Memphis with the wife and kids (thanks, Roland), plans to buy a CB radio with a giant whip antenna… all while Opie, Sherrod, and E-Rock lose their minds. Plus Matt Farah from The Smoking Tire drops in live. Pure chaos.


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Opie finally tracks down a missing Carl Ruiz, who's been off the grid for days in Miami — no phone, living like it's 1988, drinking champagne, driving a rented Ferrari in a Hulk Hogan shirt and clogs. Pure chaos, wild stories, and a heartfelt tribute to their late friend Gary from Ubon's Barbecue. Classic Opie & Carl.

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Dr. Ian Smith joins Opie, Chef Carl Ruiz and comedian Mark Normand. Carl casually destroys an insane amount of sugar on air — Reese’s, cookies, Hawaiian Punch, fruit snacks, and more — while the doctor breaks down exactly what it’s doing to his body.Carl explains his “live every day like you won the lottery” philosophy after watching his super-healthy dad get hit with early-onset Alzheimer’s at 62. The conversation gets real about sugar addiction, school lunches, food deserts, pre-diabetes, and how the food industry engineers the “bliss point” to keep you hooked.Topics covered:
How much sugar the average American a...

​It is one of the most surreal and unbelievable moments in rock history. Opie and Chef Carl Ruiz look back at the legendary jam band patriarch, Colonel Bruce Hampton.
​During his star-studded 70th birthday concert, the Colonel collapsed on stage during the final encore. Because of his notorious history of onstage pranks, the musicians kept right on jamming and the crowd kept dancing, completely convinced it was all part of the act. We dive into the shocking footage, the confusion of that night, and the wild legacy of a music icon who truly died doing what he loved.
​Follow...

Carl roasts the gang’s brilliant idea to podcast inside a haunted abandoned building (sage and moon rock included), then the crew spirals into NYC underground secrets, Grand Central shoot-on-sight rumors, the “Running of the Mexicans,” black squirrels, street-hot Harlem queens, Aretha Franklin worship, pig roasts, and Tim Sabian’s post-mom-death juice cleanse that immediately crumbles for barbecue. Ends with Mike casually dropping the greatest “I got drunk and pierced my D” story of all time. Classic Opie & Carl chaos — zero plot, maximum laughs.

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Opie, Carl, and Sherrod move into their shiny new Westwood One studio on grimy 42nd Street… and immediately start roasting the dim lights, shaky tables, and Civil War-era ghosts of Times Square past. What follows is pure chaos: dodging homeless chaos outside, “catch and release” hot tourists, Cross Bronx Expressway survival stories, the fat kid who fell through three floors into dog shit, the kid who dropped a chunk of sidewalk on a duck family, and Rhonda lighting fireworks in a cat’s ass. Childhood psychopath spotters, Fresh Air Fund weirdness, Vietnamese lightning survivors, Catholic priest shade, grandpa’s shoplifting jacket, an...

​Carl Ruiz brings in a $3,000 bottle of Pappy Van Winkle bourbon, but the high-end tasting takes an emotional turn. Carl breaks down while explaining his "Life to the Tilt" philosophy in a raw, hilarious, and legendary moment. Chris Distefano and Sherrod Small join the crew to talk shop on the greatest comedies of all time and one of the best years in radio history. 

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Theo Von calls in from an airplane for the sole purpose of roasting Chris Distefano, leading to a legendary back-and-forth you have to hear to believe. Carl Ruiz sharing his hilariously unfiltered take on attending the Kentucky Derby. Plus, Chris tells the wild story of the time his father forced him to "play disabled" at age 12 just to snag better seats at a Yankees game. 

*** This is e pre podcast show from Opie's last year of radio.

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Opie on the Upper West Side with Carl looking like a “hairy glazed donut,” they grab falafels and wander Manhattan swapping wild tales—Opie’s lightning-struck Asian caddy story, childhood crushes, and way too much swamp lip talk. Shopping bag full of herpes meds and hamster treats, rib-grabbing arguments, bodega stops, subway “WOOOs,” Times Square wax figures, and plenty of cringe bystander interactions before heading to the new Westwood One studio with Sherrod. Pure uncut, off-the-cuff Opie Radio chaos.


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Opie, Carl & Sherrod react to jam band legend Colonel Bruce Hampton collapsing and dying on stage during his star-studded 70th birthday show (they play the cell phone video). Carl gets his official chef certificate and Dickies jacket, then immediately gets roasted. Louis plans a wild Atlantic City bachelor party week, Carl tells the insane story of how he met Marie, and DJ Who Kid turns the studio into a Cinco de Mayo twerk session that a rabbi walks right past. Non-stop chaos, laughs, and one very confused holy man.

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Opie and Carl finally hit the ESPN campus in Bristol for Carl’s Fantasy Football cooking gig — and they’re given full run of the place.Fight song hallway madness, endless free snacks, studio sneaking, Redneck Hash Browns, mistaken Serena Williams sightings, and Opie almost getting them both kicked out. Pure degenerate fun as two radio guys roam one of sports TV’s biggest compounds like it’s their playground.This is the payoff episode after the rainy road trip — zero filter, zero adult supervision.Key Moments:
Blasting college fight songsCarl’s killer Cuban sandwiches & deviled eggsOpie’s stage fright stories +...

Opie and Carl are stuck in the car on a chaotic road trip to ESPN for Carl’s big gig — with Gloria in lead car taking every back road known to man. Carl goes full cheeseball and sends his crush the Fleetwood Mac song 'Everywhere'… then sweats the reply. Carl tells the legendary story of his brother getting teary-eyed slow-dancing to 'Lady in Red,' almost ruining a double score at a wedding. Plus: white clam pizza debates that trigger Twitter warriors, one-hit wonder rabbit holes (Thompson Twins, Chris de Burgh, 99 Luftballons), hating on social media trolls, passing the Sandy Hook e...

Opie and Carl hit the road to Frank Pepe's in Danbury for one of the best clam pies in America before Carl's big ESPN Fantasy Football chef gig! Nonstop laughs as they chase Gloria through pouring rain, dodge her aggressive lane changes, and debate one-hit wonders, motorcycle stories, and wild past antics. Carl breaks down why Pepe's coal-fired clam pizza is legendary (thin crispy crust, ocean-fresh clams, 100 years of history), and deals with crush texts and raincoat drama. Pure unfiltered buddy comedy, food talk, and real-talk vibes. If you love raw road trip chaos, killer food stories, and guy banter – th...

Join Opie and Carl Ruiz on a laugh-out-loud road trip to Bristol, Connecticut for Carl's massive ESPN Fantasy Football chef gig! From nearly running out of gas while tailing Gloria (Carl's fiery assistant/chef) through rain and chaos, to nonstop banter about readers, Mac trucks, flat tires, and Cuban food adventures—this episode is pure unscripted comedy gold. Carl shares what it's really like inside the ESPN campus, wild stories with Tito Puente, Peter Luger cheeseburgers with Bill Durney, and his new crush. Plus Gloria joins for gas station gold, and the guys reflect on 20 years of radio friendship, self-sabotage, an...

Pre podcast episode from Opie's radio show
The Moon, The Neighborhood Watch, and The Great "Fruit" Lie!

​What happens when a specific culture takes over an entire town? They fixed Carl's candy machine.  We dive deep into the fascinating world of the Hasidics—turns out, you can learn a lot about a culture while you’re just trying to satisfy a sweet tooth.
​Inside this episode:
​The School District Scam: Carl exposes how a "rich" neighborhood can afford massive sports complexes but can’t figure out air conditioning or decent school lunches.
​The Great Moon...

Opie rolls up to Carl’s legendary Creepy Cabin in the mountains and immediately gets swarmed by the badass hounds. From there it’s non-stop: checking out Carl’s pro-level party layout (bedroom only for comfort, obviously), a frozen joint that won’t come out, moss-covered roof talk, and Carl’s wild story about his ladies-man dad and the Dominican tenant who kept the “rent tradition” alive.

Also, the "Clean Kill": Why Carl decided to whistle and eat cotton candy while his marriage was imploding around him.
​The Mercedes Incident: Returning from a trip only to find out his car had...

Two grown men, one rainy drive, zero filter. Opie’s battling a fresh flat tire and screaming at Waze while Carl — freshly divorced and turning his creepy New Jersey cabin into Party Central — waits in the woods. What starts as a simple pickup becomes their most honest, hilarious, and surprisingly deep heart-to-heart yet. Carl reveals the exact moment he knew his marriage was a “ghost ship,” rips into fair-weather friends who ghosted him then crawled back for the parties, and blames Nickelback for making guys soft. Opie shares his own backstabbing war stories from radio and heartbreak. Expect hot-dog Fortnite dance plan...

Radar Online just dropped a juicy hit piece claiming Howard Stern is finally getting Opie fired in October — and the boys are ripping it to shreds in real time. Opie, Carl Ruiz, and Sherrod Small roast the shady “insiders,” lose their minds over a week-long broken Reese’s machine that exposes corporate laziness, swap insane old-radio war stories (bottle rockets out of a vagina, mustard-sprayed toothpick guy, the works), plus why today’s dudes can’t close at the bar. Pure unfiltered chaos, zero filter, maximum laughs — hit play right now and remember why Opie Radio still slaps harder than anything else...

Opie & Carl christen their brand new Westwood One studio and immediately turn it into a chaotic penalty box. Tiny room, endless static (sorry Joey), producer booth envy, sage blessings, and stuffed animal plans — pure Opie & Carl energy. Robert gets praised as the ultimate wingman while Tim Sabian’s legendary tight pants nearly get everyone stabbed by gangsters. Opie recounts the Naked Cowboy run-in and the classic Sandy Kane guitar-smashing lawsuit. Carl tells a painfully douchy one-eye photo story, and Robert drops an all-time insane crazy ex tale involving planted drugs and cops. Raw, zero guests, old-school O&A vibes with tigh...

Opie and Carl hit the streets of Times Square for a full-blown walk-and-talk chaos episode! Opie tries to stroll back into the SiriusXM building like he never got fired, gets laughed at by security, and runs into an old coworker who’s still got a real job. From there it’s pure New York madness: Opie’s carrying shaman sage bundles and glitter “moon rocks” in a supermarket bag (Carl is dying), they harass a schizophrenic street guy, get wiped down by the Naked Cowboy himself, roast the topless painted-boob girls, expose the CD rappers scam, and debate why tourists only eat a...

*** pre podcast from Opie's radio show where he met Carl Ruz and became instant friends.
Opie unleashes a barrage of his most unhinged, laugh-out-loud real-life tales—from bootlegging entire concerts with hidden tripods and hollowed-out wheelchairs, to freebasing roommates, ghetto race-war parties, and accidentally smoking out an entire house with burnt bacon. Joined by Chris Distefano, Carl Ruiz, and Sherrod Small, this episode dives deep into wild college hustles, the kind of reckless 20s adventures that still shock today. Hit play for raw, irreverent storytelling that proves some legends are too crazy to make up—new listeners, buckle up for...

Opie and Carl take the stage at Podcast Movement 2018 in Philadelphia for a packed panel on storytelling, podcasting, and the shift from terrestrial radio to the intimate world of podcasts.Joined by Westwood One’s Tim Sabian and storytelling expert Dr. Janice Presser, they break down:
What makes a story actually land with listenersWhy passion and relatability beat everythingHow to get real, unguarded stories out of guests (even celebs)The biggest differences between radio and podcastingEditing tricks, preparation tips, and why podcasts create deeper fan connectionsPlus plenty of laughs as Carl talks about living in his creepy cabin, killing bu...

Opie ditches his Amtrak ticket and hops in Carl Ruiz’s tiny 1988 Volkswagen Fox for a chaotic road trip from Philly back to New York City.In this episode, the boys stop at a legendary 60-year-old charcoal steakhouse called The Pub in Camden, NJ, where they destroy massive filets and Carl works his Food Network magic on the waitress. Then it’s back on the road in the shaking, smoking, fart-filled Fox — complete with a loose steering wheel that honks, a Flying Pig hood ornament, and the car hitting “up to speed” at a terrifying 71 mph.Filled with non-stop laughs, wild stori...