Holding Space with Dr. Barker

At nine years old, Laura Bratton was diagnosed with a rare retinal disease. Without a timeline or roadmap, she gradually lost her usable vision and was completely blind by the time she graduated from high school.

In this deeply honest episode of Holding Space, Laura joins clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker to discuss the grief, depression, anxiety, and panic attacks that accompanied that transition—and the people and practices that helped her continue moving forward.

Laura explains why resilience is rarely smooth or linear, how her family taught her to take life one day at a...

What happens when everyone relies on you, but you do not know who you can rely on?

In this solo episode of Holding Space, clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker explores the hidden loneliness of being the dependable one—the person who solves problems, calms others, and carries more than anyone realizes.

Dr. Barker examines how this role can begin with parentification, childhood emotional responsibility, family hardship, workplace pressure, or relationships in which being useful becomes closely tied to belonging. He also discusses hyper-independence, burnout, the discomfort of receiving care, and why asking for help can fe...

From the rugged trails and waterfalls of Torrin Pools on Scotland’s Isle of Skye, Dr. Christopher Barker reflects on the road behind us—and the one still ahead.

Complex trauma can teach us to expect the future to repeat the past. Even when the danger has ended, we may remain in survival mode, waiting for the next bad thing to happen. But the road ahead can also lead toward repair, intimacy, connection, and joy.

That does not mean the journey will be smooth. There may still be slippery rocks, unexpected setbacks, and enough mud to r...

What happens when trauma is treated as a diagnosis without fully hearing the life behind it?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with anthropologist, researcher, author, and survivor Dr. Sandra J.T.M. Evers about relational violence, institutional harm, C-PTSD, and the human capacity for resilience.

Dr. Evers shares how an abusive relationship left her physically free but still imprisoned by fear, nightmares, and a nervous system prepared for danger. She also explains how lessons from her anthropological work in Madagascar helped her reconnect with community, culture, spirituality, and her own...

Three places. Three reflections. One journey from survival toward healing.

Travel through Scotland with Dr. Christopher Barker as he explores how we can honor our history without allowing it to dictate our future, move forward while fear is still present, and rediscover joy along the way.

Join clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker for a special Holding Space on the Road episode filmed across Scotland.

Outside the historic Dean Castle, Dr. Barker reflects on the stories and experiences we inherit—and why our history does not have to determine our future.

From th...

What if what feels like chemistry is actually your nervous system recognizing chaos?

After surviving childhood abuse, Anu Verma spent decades disconnected from her emotions and searching outside herself for love, safety, and acceptance. She found herself moving from one unhealthy relationship to another without understanding why the pattern kept repeating.

In this deeply personal episode of Holding Space, Anu joins clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker to explore how childhood trauma can shape self-worth, attachment, communication, and the relationships we choose as adults.

Together, they discuss:

• Why familiar chaos can be mi...

Why can you understand that a relationship is unhealthy and still feel unable to let go?

Attachment wounds do not exist only in our thoughts. They can become deeply embedded in the body, shaping whom we are drawn to, how we respond to uncertainty, and why painful relationship patterns continue even after we understand them intellectually.

In this episode of Holding Space, clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with Ben Oofana, an instructor and healing practitioner who has spent more than 35 years working with people navigating heartbreak, grief, trauma, and major life transitions.

...

What happens when trauma you survived decades ago finally asks to be felt?

At twelve years old, Tracy Smaldino was the sole survivor of a devastating car accident that took the lives of both her cousins. She sustained burns across 70 percent of her body, a serious head injury, damaged lungs, and other life-threatening injuries. She had to learn how to read, write, and speak again. Years later, she survived another deeply traumatic experience at a high school party.

For nearly forty years, Tracy pushed much of that pain aside. When she finally began confronting it...

What happens when a present-day trauma opens the door to wounds you have carried since childhood?

After surviving four car accidents in sixteen months, author Constance André found herself living with PTSD, panic attacks, physical pain, and a nervous system that no longer recognized safety. What initially appeared to be a response to the accidents gradually revealed deeper layers of childhood trauma, fear, perfectionism, and a lifelong need for control.

In this episode of *Holding Space*, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with Constance about the difficult, deeply personal work of healing trauma in both the mind a...

What happens when your job requires you to witness other people’s worst days—and then go home as though the emergency ended when your shift did?

Police officers, firefighters, EMTs, therapists, and other helping professionals are repeatedly exposed to experiences most people hope never to encounter. They learn to stay calm, make impossible decisions, suppress their reactions, and continue working. But functioning well does not mean the nervous system remains unaffected.

In this episode of Holding Space, clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker explores the hidden psychological cost of first responder work and what happens when...

Why can you miss someone deeply—even when the relationship was hurting you?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker examines the complicated truth behind the phrase “not everyone you lose is a loss.” The end of an unhealthy relationship may eventually bring relief, but that does not mean the person never mattered—or that losing them will not hurt.

Through the story of Laura, a woman caught in a cycle of withdrawal, fear, reassurance, and temporary relief, Dr. Barker explores how an unpredictable relationship can gradually reorganize your emotional life. You may begin mo...

Could healing begin by changing how we understand consciousness—and ourselves?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with Dean Graves, a four-book author, meditation and mindfulness guide, mental health counselor, and host of Chatting with the Arcturians.

Bringing together clinical psychology and spiritual philosophy, Dean presents his perspective on consciousness, trauma, identity, and the human journey toward greater awareness. He explores how our perceived separation from our authentic self may contribute to stress and suffering—and why turning our attention inward can become an important part of healing.

Together, Dr...

What happens when the life that looks successful from the outside no longer feels like your own?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with Catherine Crestani—writer, speaker, former speech-language pathologist, and host of Willow Healing Matters—about burnout, people-pleasing, identity loss, and the courage to change direction.

Catherine shares how she gradually lost herself within a marriage, built successful businesses that left her deeply unfulfilled, and continued functioning until panic attacks, insomnia, chronic stress, and physical numbness made it impossible to ignore what her body was communicating.

To...

When someone’s harmful behavior is influenced by mental illness, trauma, addiction, or cognitive decline, what does understanding require from the people who were hurt?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker explores the difficult distinction between explaining behavior and excusing its consequences. Through examples involving mania, depression, trauma, addiction, and dementia, he examines how compassion can gradually become accommodation—and how accommodation can reshape an entire family.

Dr. Barker discusses why the most psychologically aware person often carries the greatest emotional burden, why trust may take longer to return than symptoms take to r...

How do we learn to receive love when childhood trauma taught us to fear connection?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with trauma-informed self-love coach, relationship repair specialist, speaker, and author Danielle Bernock about her deeply personal journey from childhood emotional neglect, self-hatred, and disorganized attachment toward healing, connection, and a legacy of love.

Danielle shares how consistent, unconditional love helped her begin to feel safe in relationships—and why moving away from everything familiar forced her to ask a life-changing question: “Who am I when I am alone in t...

What happens when your child’s distress activates something unresolved from your own childhood?

In this special Holding Space on the Road edition, Dr. Christopher Barker explores how a parent’s past can quietly enter the room during moments of conflict, fear, anger, or separation.

People who were hurt as children are not destined to hurt their own children. But unresolved trauma can make it difficult to distinguish between what a child is experiencing and what the child’s emotions awaken inside the parent.

A child’s tears may feel like an accusation. Their an...

What if you’re not broken—but responding exactly as a nervous system shaped by uncertainty, shame, attachment injury, or chronic stress learned to respond?

In this special guest appearance, Dr. Christopher Barker joins Adulting with Autism for a powerful conversation about complex trauma, neurodivergence, and the survival patterns that can quietly shape adult life.

They explore why autism, ADHD, anxiety, burnout, shame, and trauma responses can be difficult to separate—and how repeated misunderstanding, rejection, or punishment can affect a person’s nervous system and sense of self.

In this episode:

• The...

Would you tell an AI something you have never told another human being?

People are turning to artificial intelligence for more than information. They’re discussing their marriages, childhoods, anxiety, sexuality, trauma, and loneliness—and asking chatbots questions that once belonged in conversations with trusted friends or therapists.

In this episode of Holding Space, psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker examines what happens when a machine becomes part of someone’s emotional life.

AI is always available. It doesn’t look bored, interrupt, appear judgmental, or grow tired of hearing the same question. For someone who has...

How many people could you call at 11 p.m. and know they would answer?

We have never had more ways to connect—and yet many of us feel increasingly alone. In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker examines the “friendship recession” and the difference between having access to people and having relationships in which we feel genuinely known.

Modern life has made everything more efficient. We work remotely, shop online, communicate through screens, and schedule nearly every interaction. But in the process, we have lost many of the repeated, ordinary encounters through which friend...

What if helping a child “feel better” actually gets in the way of emotional growth?

Dr. Christopher Barker welcomes child and family therapist David Marcus, PhD, for a thoughtful conversation about how childhood experiences shape the ways we respond to stress, conflict, and intense emotions later in life.

They explore how parents can become a “soothing presence”—creating the emotional safety children need to express difficult feelings, develop a meaningful emotional vocabulary, and learn how to regulate themselves. Dr. Marcus also explains why distraction, logic, minimizing, and immediately offering solutions can prevent children and partne...

How is artificial intelligence changing therapy—and what could that mean for client privacy, professional ethics, and genuine human connection?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with Australian clinical psychotherapist, clinical counsellor, and ICF-accredited coach Renee McDonald about the growing influence of AI and digital technology on mental health care.

Renee introduces a provocative concern: Are clinicians trading their clients’ privacy for professional convenience?

Together, they explore:

• The benefits and risks of using AI in therapy
• Client confidentiality and digital mental health records
• Questions clinicians should ask...

Is it your culture, your family dynamics, or complex trauma shaping the way you experience relationships? Often, the answer is all three.

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker explores how culture teaches us the rules of relationships while complex trauma shapes what we expect those relationships to feel like.

Two people can follow the same cultural expectations—family loyalty, caregiving, emotional restraint, or respect for authority—while experiencing them in completely different ways. For one person, loyalty may feel like connection. For another, it may feel like fear, guilt, or obligation.

Dr...

Writing a book is difficult—but for many authors, finishing the manuscript is only the beginning.

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker speaks with author T.A. Thompson about writing and self-publishing his adult post-apocalyptic thriller, The Mark. Thompson shares why the book sat unpublished for five years, how repeated rejection affected his confidence, and what finally helped him move forward.

Together, they explore:

• Why writing can feel easier than marketing
• What authors can learn from honest beta readers
• The value of professional editing and outside perspectives
• How reject...

Have you ever gone blank during a difficult conversation—only to think of everything you wanted to say five minutes later? Or found yourself apologizing, agreeing, or trying to make everything okay even when you did nothing wrong?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker explains the freeze and fawn responses and why they can take over during conflict. When safety feels uncertain, the brain may prioritize protection over reasoning—not because you are weak, unintelligent, or incapable of setting boundaries, but because your nervous system is relying on patterns that once helped you survive.

What happens when an aging parent needs care—but the family relationship is strained, estranged, or shaped by unresolved trauma?

Eldercare expert Amy Friesen joins clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker to examine the complicated realities facing adult children who are expected to become caregivers. Society often assumes that every aging parent has built-in family support, but that expectation rarely accounts for childhood trauma, unsafe relationships, family estrangement, financial limitations, or the caregiver’s own health and responsibilities.

Amy explains why caregiving decisions are rarely as simple as asking, “Will you take care of your parents?” For many...

Why do some messages instantly capture our attention while others fail to connect?

Certified communication coach and emotional intelligence trainer Sandy Gerber joins clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker to explore “Emotional Magnets”—the specific drivers behind why we do what we do, react the way we react, and make the decisions we make.

Sandy introduces the SAVE framework: Safety, Achievement, Value, and Experience. She explains how understanding these emotional drivers can improve communication with romantic partners, employees, clients, and even people we have just met. When we recognize what is driving our behavior, we are better...

Cheyenne Heflin survived childhood abuse, stage-four osteosarcoma, an above-the-knee amputation, complicated grief, and a rare cancer recurrence—but her story is about more than survival.

In this deeply personal episode, Cheyenne joins clinical psychologist Dr. Christopher Barker to explore how complex trauma can shape identity, self-worth, authenticity, and our relationship with our bodies. She shares how being labeled “strong” and “resilient” became an identity of its own—and how she began reclaiming the playful, vulnerable, imperfect, and authentic parts of herself that trauma taught her to hide.

Together, Cheyenne and Dr. Barker discuss childhood cancer survivorship...

Why do healthy relationships sometimes feel unsafe? Why do so many people unknowingly sabotage the love they want most?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with relationship coach, former U.S. Marine, former private investigator, and NLP practitioner Chris Fields to explore the hidden psychological patterns that shape our closest relationships.

Together they discuss:

• Why childhood attachment patterns follow us into adulthood
 • How unresolved trauma creates hypervigilance and self-sabotage
 • The subconscious beliefs that quietly destroy relationships
 • Why communication breaks down—even between people who love each other

One of the deepest wounds of childhood sexual abuse isn't only the trauma itself—it's the identity that forms around it.

In this powerful episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with trauma educator, author, and survivor Lisha Antiqua to explore how childhood sexual abuse shapes our sense of self, our relationships, emotional patterns, and the stories we carry long into adulthood.

Rather than focusing solely on remembering traumatic events, this conversation explores what it means to rebuild identity, regulate the nervous system, and move toward genuine post-traumatic growth.

Together they di...

Childhood trauma doesn't always disappear with time. Sometimes it quietly shapes our sleep, relationships, mental health, and even our physical well-being for decades.

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with physician and integrative healing practitioner Dr. Noushin Hart to discuss her extraordinary journey from surviving childhood sexual abuse and treatment-resistant depression to discovering hope after more than 30 years of searching for answers.

After conventional treatments—including psychotherapy, antidepressants, EMDR, and Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS)—failed to provide lasting relief, Dr. Hart began exploring integrative approaches that ultimately transformed her life.

How do trauma, family patterns, relationships, and modern technology shape who we become?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with intuitive coach and spiritual counselor Laura Hoorweg for a thought-provoking conversation about trauma, authenticity, relationships, healing, and the growing loneliness epidemic. 

Together they explore:

✔ Intergenerational trauma and ancestral patterns
 ✔ Birth trauma, attachment, and subconscious experiences
 ✔ Healing relationship patterns without re-traumatization
 ✔ Emotional abuse, gaslighting, and reclaiming self-worth
 ✔ Why awareness is the first step toward healing
 ✔ Nature as a tool for nervous system regulation and recovery
 ✔ Soc...

Are we pursuing success because it truly matters to us—or because society tells us we should?

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with Tomide Akinola to explore the hidden costs of hustle culture, chronic high performance, burnout, and the pressure to monetize every aspect of our lives.

Together they discuss:

• Why high achievement can become emotionally exhausting
 • The relationship between agency, autonomy, and mental health
 • How productivity culture disconnects us from ourselves
 • Burnout prevention strategies for professionals, students, and creatives
 • The importance of rest, balance, a...

What happens after you escape abuse? How do you rebuild a life when trauma has shaped your nervous system, relationships, identity, and sense of safety?

In this deeply moving episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with Rosie Maloney, author of Girl Unbroken (HarperCollins, 2016), to explore survival, resilience, healing, and the power of small moments of connection.

Rosie shares her extraordinary journey through severe childhood abuse, foster care system failures, family separation, and bipolar disorder—and how she ultimately broke the cycle of trauma while raising three children in a safe and loving ho...

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with renowned psychologist, leadership consultant, author, TEDx speaker, and wellbeing expert Dr. Audrey Tang for an insightful conversation about leadership, confidence, resilience, workplace wellbeing, and the power of self-awareness.

Drawing from her work in organizational psychology, coaching, public speaking, and community wellbeing initiatives, Dr. Tang explains why many workplace wellbeing programs fail, how leaders can create psychologically safe environments, and why sustainable performance begins with confidence and agency—not perfection.

Together, they explore burnout, resilience, trauma-informed leadership, workplace culture, the dangers of over-identifying with di...

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker sits down with leadership culture strategist, educator, and author Dr. Stephanie Duguid to explore the powerful connection between leadership, communication, workplace culture, and human well-being.

Drawing from decades of experience in education, organizational leadership, and workplace culture development, Dr. Duguid shares why effective leadership is not about titles, authority, or rigid policies—it is about communication, authenticity, and the ability to create environments where people feel seen, heard, and supported.

Together, they discuss how communication shapes culture, why workplace stress and burnout often show up through be...

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker talks with Dr. Michael Scarano—former physical therapy assistant, chiropractor, and medical doctor—about his powerful concept of “toxic perseverance.” Drawing on decades in healthcare, his own trauma history, and the loss of a close friend to suicide, Dr. Scarano explains how unprocessed trauma and the subconscious mind can quietly drive perfectionism, overworking, imposter syndrome, shame, and chronic emotional pain.

Together, they explore why so many “high-functioning” people are suffering underneath their success, how complex trauma, ADHD, and lifelong self-criticism can shape identity, and why men in particular struggle to...

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker explores how complex trauma shapes the way we experience uncertainty in relationships. Introducing the concept of “relational time,” he explains why small moments—like a delayed text or a shift in tone—can quickly feel like rejection, loss, or danger. Through a guided exercise, listeners learn how the nervous system predicts outcomes based on past experiences and how healing begins by staying present in moments that feel uncertain instead of rushing to conclusions.

This episode is a powerful resource for anyone interested in mental health, mental health awareness, trauma h...

Join Dr. Christopher Barker in conversation with Joanna Martin, MFT graduate student, executive functioning coach, and mental health content creator from Southern California. Joanna shares her transformative experience volunteering at the Evolution of Psychotherapy Conference, where she connected with industry leaders like Lynn Lyons, Terry Real, and Elliott Connie.

Discover how systems thinking revolutionizes therapy practice, the reality of being a master's-level clinician, and practical insights on building an online community of therapists and students. Perfect for aspiring therapists, current grad students, mental health professionals, and anyone interested in relational work and family systems therapy. Learn about...

In this powerful episode, Dr. Christopher Barker explores what healing after trauma really looks like, especially for survivors of domestic violence during Mental Health Month. Listeners will learn how prolonged relational danger reshapes the nervous system, why trauma-informed care and trauma-focused mental health support are essential, and how tools like Victims Voice can help survivors safely document abuse and be heard. This conversation raises domestic violence awareness, reduces stigma around mental health, and offers validation, education, and hope for survivors, loved ones, and professionals committed to trauma-informed healing.

For speaking engagements, workshops, or to invite Dr. Barker...

In this episode of Holding Space, Dr. Christopher Barker talks with trauma counselor and toxic workplace specialist Aretha Kruger, founder of Me But Better Counseling in South Africa. Aretha shares how emotional and psychological abuse at work often spills into our home lives, why you’re not “crazy” for feeling confused or doubting yourself, and how to spot the red flags of a toxic culture. She offers practical tools like documentation (“cover your ass files”), boundary-setting, and quick WhatsApp voice-note support to help you protect your mental health and start rebuilding self-trust.

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