Surthrival Podcast with Stacia

Warning: This episode contains information about sexual abuse and human trafficking and may not be appropriate for younger audiences.

This episode of “SURTHRIVAL: Grief of Being Single” is around a difficult topic – Human Trafficking and Sexual Abuse. This podcast explores healing from loss of all kinds and does not shy away from difficult subjects. My guest, LeAnn Walters, is a Case Manager at NAHT Coalition https://www.nahtcoalition.org/, working with women who have escaped the bondage of human trafficking. She is a graduate of the Well House https://www.the-wellhouse.org/. Together we explore the gr...

Divorce is a type of special kind of grief. In the death of a marriage, there can be feelings of shame, anger, disappointment and betrayal. Unlike loss by death, others don’t often attribute the divorce as grief and rarely help the person who is left alone in their sadness.

Erica Jewell shares with vulnerability about her grief experience regarding her divorce. She reveals some of her deep feelings of loss and embarrassment. More importantly Erica shares how she worked through her mourning:

- Hiking with friends – grief shows in your body, nature heal...

Surthrival 101

Keys to befriending grief, leaning into loss for healthy healing

Grieving is hard work, and for that reason many put it off. Unfortunately, the only way through grief is to face the darkness head-on. Surthrival principles help those dealing with loss begin their journey or assist them when they get stuck in the process. This is a list of the basic principles with definitions. There are episodes that correlate to the principles, but this quick list is a good start to this difficult journey. Take a step. The way is rocky, but these tools...

Lisa McNair was born to grieving parents who lost their first daughter, Denise McNair, one of four Black girls killed in the 16th Street Church Bombing on September 15, 1963. From the beginning she felt the heavy load of bringing joy, being perfect and doing all the right things due to the horrible loss of a sister she never knew. Part of this narrative for her was the importance of getting married. Though this was what Lisa desired, she's never found the right person…at least not yet. She watched her friends marry and grieved her singleness for decades. Only in th...

Susan Hoskins (my long-time friend) and Carolyn Weaver of Columbus, GA became friends through small groups at church. When Carolyn couldn’t put one foot in front of the other, her granddaughter took her to church. Susan, however, ran like a horse out of the gate, eager to re-enter a spiritual community she’d been missing while caring for her ailing husband. They found each other on the A-Team (Admin Team), a small group of servants who stock the shelves at the Columbus campus of Church of the Highlands. They found comfort and friendship through this team and two othe...

Monte Erwin shares the story of losing his wife, Janet, a little more than a year ago. As an introvert, he has had to force himself to get out of the house, increasing the amount of volunteering with his church, Shades Crest Baptist Church in Hoover, AL. He also purchased two adorable Miniature Schnauzer brothers who have brought him laughter, snuggles and comfort. His advice to the grieving: 1) give yourself a lot of grace 2) take care of yourself (through healthy eating and exercise) and 3) don't be afraid to say no (even if it's just for a season).

Single Again - Who am I?

After losing a spouse, we can find ourselves wondering who we are outside of that relationship? Deidre Clark shares her story of loss and how she became reacquainted with herself after losing Brian “Voice Porter” Hawkins. One of the questions she asked herself was if she really liked Marvel movies or watched them because Brian liked them. She does like them!

When grief brings the loss of a significant relationship, it is an opportunity for the surthrivor to get to know themselves again – from our entertainment choices to what we lik...

Caleb Young lost his older brother, Ty—whom he idolized—to suicide when he was 11. The loss shaped the way he viewed life and the choices he made as he grew up. In Cuero (Spanish for “raw hide”), a small Texas town where many men drive trucks and wear cowboy boots and hats, the culture is rugged and rooted in hunting, fishing, and ranching. In a place like that, social norms—paired with traditional expectations of masculinity—can create a different kind of grieving, one that is often quiet, internal, and delayed. Caleb shares his story of loss, the long-term ef...

In this series, we have talked about suicide prevention, suicide bereavement and heard the sad story of Natalie, who at thirteen lost her dad to suicide. This final episode takes a different approach. This is John Cooper’s story of considering suicide after being incarcerated for a white-collar crime. Many of you have asked me how anyone can choose to end their life. It doesn’t seem rational, and it’s not.

Listen to John’s story of loss (of freedom, reputation and his family) which included shame and embarrassment while serving time in prison, a world he never...

Natalie was just 13 when she lost her dad to suicide. This profound loss damaged her mental well-being until she found her passion and purpose of helping people in the name of Jesus. Natalie came to the United States on a mission trip years ago and ended up staying – recently getting her US citizenship! She is a wife and mother (of twin boys). Originally from Cape Town, South Africa, Natalie serves as COO and Director of Advancement at Grace Klein Community, a Birmingham-based non-profit. https://gracekleincommunity.com/

Listen as Natalie shares her story of being a suicide SURTHRIVER.

In this episode we continue our conversation around Suicide with Meesha Emmett, Area Director for the Alabama Chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP). Previously we spent our energy on suicide prevention. In this episode, we focus on the grief of those who have lost a loved one to death by suicide. This type of grief is complicated and is often ignored due to guilt, blame and shame. Suicide is a taboo topic, but we have to talk about this and help those who are suffering from this complex loss. If you have experienced this type of...

WARNING: This episode discusses suicide and may be triggering for some listeners and inappropriate for younger audiences.

Meesha Emmett of the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention (Alabama Chapter) and I talk honestly about the taboo topic of Suicide. In this introductory episode we share our personal stories, talk about suicide prevention and share staggering statistics about this preventable epidemic. We can save lives by educating ourselves and advocating for those considering suicide. This practical and enlightening series is for those thinking of suicide, those who may be concerned that a loved one has suicidal ideation and for...

Nobody likes to talk about death before the event, but it's important. Listen as Bryan Hancock of Timberchase Financial shares practical tips about getting your finances in order before a significant loss, as well as top tips for what steps you need to take after losing a spouse.

Financial Surthrival Plan for after losing a spouse: (Stacia tested and approved!)

https://www.timberchase...

Based on our relationships with people, we grieve differently. Robert Hill shares a tale of two griefs - his stepdad and his dad. Listen as he shares what he learned from each loss and how he surthrived.

In this episode of Surthrival, Stacia explores the unexpectedly profound truth behind the phrase “making lemonade.” What begins as a story involving drawing of a lemon tree at a prayer session unfolds into a powerful reflection on how God transforms the most bitter seasons of grief into new beginnings. Through examples from her own life, past guests, local ministries, and even a chance encounter at a diner, Stacia shows how pain can be reshaped into compassion, purpose, and healing. She also shares the story behind the upcoming Creative Healing Retreat, a space designed for women longing to move from surv...

In this episode, Stacia continues the Remembrance series with Author Beth Miller for a powerful conversation on grief, gratitude, and the tension that exists between the two. Together, they explore the dangers of spiritual bypassing, the “both/and” reality of healing, and the profound metaphor of "black fire" and "white fire". Beth shares her own experiences with loss, which led her to write the book What Loss Can Teach Us, a novel that explores the ways grief can expand us rather than diminish us.

Today's Guest: Beth Miller

Sponsored by: Kim Marie Carter in memory of h...

Two creative theologians dive deep into The Last Supper (Communion) as it relates to grief and remembering. We learn a new term, anamnesis, which means calling to mind to look toward the future.

Today's Guest(s): Dr. Shaun King, Senior Pastor, John’s Creek Baptist Church, Alpharetta, GA & Milton Brasher-Cunningham, clergy and author, Mount Carmel Congregational Church, Hamden, CT

Sponsored by: In memory of Jack Carter

n this episode, Charlotte Cushing Cearley recounts the sudden loss of her husband upon their return to the United States after a lifetime spent serving in Africa. Recently, Charlotte invited her two sisters to accompany her on a special birthday trip of remembrance to Africa, revisiting one of the places she and her husband lived and worked. Her story highlights the comfort and healing that come from shared journeys and familial support in times of grief.

Sponsored by: In memory of Sandy Cook’s Mom

Guest(s): Madison Gaines Norwood, daughter

Stacia and her daughter talk about how they’ve remembered their husband and father. Furthermore, they explore the customs of mourning they experienced while living in China which included “hungry ghosts”.

Sponsored by: Chris Winchester In memory of Matt Gaines, beloved husband and father

Meryeum Tunagur-Williams and Angel Torres share their honest and heartfelt thoughts about the things that helped them grieve and the things that didn’t help.

Sponsored by: Gina Faletta, State Farm Agent

Rabbi Steven Henkin of Temple Beth El in Birmingham, AL discusses sitting shiva which is a Jewish tradition where mourners gather for seven days after a funeral, surrounded by family and friends. This ritual offers comfort, structure, and community support, helping those who grieve to process their loss and begin healing together.

Sponsored by: Kim Lefelar (best friend) in honor of her mom, Marlene Burns

Today's guest: Chris O'Rear, an ordained minister, licensed clinical pastoral therapist, shares practical tips that help you form stronger friendships, navigate conflicts and support loved ones through tough times.

Sponsored by Chris Winchester, best boss, in honor of my husband, Matt Gaines.

New Series, New Episode, New Guest, Take a listen!

Join guest Nell and T. Marie

Sponsored by the Alabama Nurses Association

Panel Discussion with Kathy Boswell, Ernest Kenty and Kim Lefelar

Sponsored by: John and Louise Beard support of the Alabama Nurses Foundation

Panel discussion with David George and Susan Hoskins

Sponsored by John and Louise Beard in support of the Alabama Nurses Foundation

Panel Discussion with David George and Susan Hoskins

Sponsored by John and Louise Beard in Support of the Alabama Nurses Foundation

Panel Discussion with Chris Blackerby, Audrey Thorpe and Janice Williams

Brought to you by: John and Louise Beard in support of the Alabama Nurses

Foundation

Panel Discussion with Chris Blackerby, Audrey Thorpe and Janice Williams

Brought to you by: John and Louise Beard in support of the Alabama Nurses

Foundation

Check out the intro to my brand new series on Caregiving! You can grab an understanding on caregiving, resources and more. Take a listen!

Mental Health Matters!

Mental Health Matters

Let's talk prevention!

Join Stacia, your host , as she does a deep dive into Regret, Remorse and Shame. Take a listen!

It's time to express!

Join Host: Stacia Gaines and Guest: Clarissa Kenty from iCu Media as they chat about the importance of expressing yourself

We are human and we all have emotions. Learning the importance of name and identifying them allows you to take ownership of your emotions and feel them accordingly. Take a listen as I name and identify them!

My personal acquaintance with grief. What it did to me and for me! Take a listen!

Check out Stacia Gaines with producer Clarissa Lester-Kenty owner of iCu Media as they chat about the humble beginnings of THE SURTHRIVAL PODCAST. Come join the convo!

Hi, I'm Stacia! So good to have you here.

My grief journey began in 2023 when my husband of 34 years died by his own hand. Grief is painful and difficult, but healing is possible. We will likely not be completely healed. Scars will remain. Sharing with others has been therapeutic for me.

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I am a widow now, but I refuse to let this singular term define me. I am the mother of two adult children and three grandchildren. I love to read, travel and explore the natural world.