The Nut Farm Podcast

WE’RE BACK, WITCHES! 🐈‍⬛🎃 Season 4 is officially here, and we’re celebrating Halloween the only way we know how: dressed as a cat and mouse, ripping Pokémon packs, and talking about randomness.

Turns out one of us isn't good at conversing while ripping packs. Insert cricket noises.

This week, Gretchen and Missy are serving up everything from nostalgic Hocus Pocus moments and an actual fire at G Soul Co. to a potential zombie sighting and our very detailed apocalypse survival plan.

We’re also addressing the internet trolls who think Pokémon cards are turning...

SEASON 3 FINALE: We’re Going Out With a Shock. ⚡️🥜

Season 3 is officially in the books, and naturally, we’re going out exactly how we came in: unfiltered, slightly unhinged, and one questionable decision away from The Nut Farm.

This week, we’re talking Pokémon obsessions, fart swirls, executive muff energy, and why motherhood should come with a warning label instead of a Pinterest board.

We get real about intrusive thoughts, the messy side of parenting, manifestation, and the importance of finding joy in the things that make absolutely no sense to anyone else.

W...

This week on The Nut Farm, we accidentally invent “rusted nuts,” celebrate a huge full-circle education moment, and immediately derail into Pokémon drama.

We recap the Target Pokémon event that promised family fun and delivered scraps, debate whether “kiddism” is a real form of discrimination, rip a few packs, and discuss the very important art of maintaining the qi (chi) of your trade binder.

Then things take a turn. Blood moon water. Period chemistry. The return of the full bush. Living your own muff truth. Pickle demanding a game of hide-and-seek. A Toxtricity pull. Tayl...

We started with salty cakes and rusted bolts and somehow things got worse from there.

This week, we investigate whether childhood turtlenecks are responsible for adult trauma, uncover a senior-living motor scooter crime wave, and discuss what happens when you accidentally flash your husband while he’s on FaceTime with a customer. Spoiler: prep the PR team.

Then Pokémon gets REAL. Two kids. Two packs. Two number-one chase cards pulled at the exact same time. Tears are shed, parenting decisions are questioned, the universe gets involved, and a new family law is officially established: if...

Gretchen and Missy are back on the farm, serving roasted nuts, salty takes, and several personal vendettas. This week, they investigate the psychological chokehold of Pokémon cards, decide Burning Man sounds like sensory hell with better outfits, and relive the heartbreak of stale egg nachos.

Gretchen channels her most supportive baseball-mom energy, Missy discovers that accountability is beautiful—but apparently optional—and one mysterious Nextdoor post sends the entire neighborhood into battle without providing a single crumb of context.

Plus: impossible professors, live-music overstimulation, questionable piercings, and the enduring consequences of giving Gretchen a nine...

Welcome back to The Nut Farm Podcast, where we serve roasted nuts with a side of salty takes to help you embrace the chaos and stay out of the Nut Farm.

This week, Gretchen and Missy somehow travel from psych ward sweatpants and hot crotch buns to marriage, motherhood, sobriety, creativity, religion, racing, Facebook Marketplace negotiations, questionable childhood drive by's—and a rehomed Goldendoodle who may or may not have catfished the entire internet.

Gretchen has a milkshake-related realization that maybe her husband is actually teaching her how to soften and be a better spouse. Mi...

This week on The Nut Farm, we’re once again proving that absolutely no topic is safe from the spiral.

We start with a Pokémon vending machine, 37 ripped packs, zero self-control and children who have officially become card-opening employees. From there, somehow, we make our way through Phoenix Fashion Week, creativity, mental health, OCD, intrusive thoughts, faith, ancient Egypt, Cleopatra, pyramid conspiracies, aliens, Bigfoot and the people we’d interview if we could talk to literally anyone—dead or alive.

Then things get even less organized.

We’ve got baseball drama, the delicate...

New intro. No show sheet. Absolutely no plan. Welcome back to The Nut Farm.

This week, Gretchen and Missy are flying blind and somehow end up everywhere: debating which childhood movies emotionally damaged us, mourning the loss of Dolly, living vicariously through kids getting the ultimate Diamondbacks experience, and surviving a G Soul Co. launch while dressed for anything except the Arizona heat.

Then things take a turn at Target, where Pokémon restock day becomes a full-contact emotional sport, Eli starts calling out grown men for hoarding tins, and complete strangers restore a tiny b...

This week on The Nut Farm, we’re showing up slightly swollen, mildly caffeinated, and ready to discuss absolutely nothing in the order it should be discussed.

We kick things off with Sculptra, missing eyebrows, IVs, and the realities of trying to keep your face together as you get older. From there, the farm takes its usual scenic route through Scottsdale Fashion Week, turquoise superstition, wedding photos and videos we may or may not ever watch, Leonardo DiCaprio and Titanic, our inability to emotionally handle sad movies, and the internet rabbit holes we probably should’ve stayed out...

Gretchen is currently sitting in FIRST PLACE for New York Fashion Week—and yes, she checks the standings multiple times a day! Between surviving their Fox 10 TV debut (and the mandatory 20-minute post-adrenaline crash nap), dodging monsoon chaos, and negotiating dolphin encounters in Mexico, the farmers are back with one of their most honest episodes yet.

00:00 - Monsoon Mayhem & Steve’s Ceiling Drip

13:35 - The Fox 10 TV Debut & Live TV Aunt Confessions

24:32 - NYFW Update: We Need Your Votes!

27:23 - The Origin Story: Crying Over Bao Buns in New York

28...

This week on The Nut Farm, Missy invented the Swiffer in fourth grade and never saw a dime. She also nearly bought every Sanrio FAO Schwarz blind box at the one Target in all of greater Phoenix that carries them, got the 1-in-25 silver chrome cinnamon roll with confetti, and bought the gold Pompompurin on eBay for $55 because she is not leaving it to chance.

The farmers also get into:

• K-pop: Missy is getting into it, Payton dances to Hats Eye, the community is very Pokémon-adjacent

• The man on IG who di...

This week on The Nut Farm, Missy told a seven-year-old girl to scram in a Chandler Mall bathroom.  The girl did not scram.  She came closer.  She may have followed them to the parking lot. Gretchen kept asking if she was a ghost.  They are not okay.

The farmers also get into:

This week on The Nut Farm, Missy is running on no sleep and zero regrets. She and her mom stood outside a Sam’s Club in deep Phoenix at 6am, in a sewage smell, for hours, in hopes of scoring the Pokémon Ascended Heroes exclusive drop. They did not score. Her dad did. At Ace Hardware. While fixing a sprinkler.

The farmers also get into:

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen just made her live TV debut for G Soul on CW7, The Daily Mix and she is still running on adrenaline. Missy felt like Kris Jenner watching from the sideline with an imaginary camcorder.

The farmers get into:

- Gretchen’s first on-camera technique: “fuck it, and also I love a good story if it goes wrong”

- The man who followed Missy to her car in the Walmart parking lot to ask if they could be friends

- Conor McGregor trying a fancy kick a...

This week on The Nut Farm, Missy is wearing the Billie Eilish Walmart pajama shirt she slept in and thinks she has developed a shellfish allergy all of a sudden. Steve walked into the surprise birthday dinner without the birthday girl (Gretchen) and had to be sent back out.

The farmers get into:

• Microblading: the scalpel, the crackle, and the sound that almost made both of them walk out

• The birthday surprise dinner — the private room, the curtain, Adam filming from the roof like paparazzi, and Missy's increasingly unhinged cover story.

• The Jord...

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen (Timmy) and Missy (Bunny) are back with a full load of life updates — and it’s a lot. The farmers get into:

• Anti-car-sick glasses that look like Where’s Waldo and may actually work

• Otis the dog, who peed on Steve’s side of the bed in an act of deliberate dominance

• The pillow situation — it’s more complicated than you think • Eli’s street sale: Pokémon cards, squishies, zero customers, full defeat

• Gretchen’s childhood snow cone empire at the Arizona bus station

• Vegas: Pop...

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen and Missy take a tour through thirty years of American chaos — starting with Lorena Bobbitt’s Ginsu knife, stopping at the OJ verdict, swinging past Michael Jackson’s black suitcase and Marilyn Monroe’s suspiciously broken window, and somehow ending at a German man’s Vegas mansion for plus-size women and an eBay Live Pokémon card addiction.

Along the way:

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen returns from vacation with beach-bronzed energy. She and Missy chat about NBA Finals opinions, World Cup commentary, and a surprisingly deep realization inspired by Jaws.

The farmers discuss:
• Why modern parenting feels harder than ever
• Whether we're doing too many things “right”
• Growing up before the internet had guardrails
• Extending grace to our younger selves
• Why happiness feels harder to find despite all our best efforts

Plus:
• Taylor Swift court-side
• Sports obsessions and championship dreams
• Richard Dreyfuss crushes
• Red-card soccer stories
• S...

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen and Missy survive their daughters’ first sleepover, (including a prank-call scandal involving McDonald’s), debate casino strategy, celebrate organizational breakthroughs, and accidentally invent a new life philosophy: Full Potato.

The farmers discuss:
• Why children are terrible liars
• Parenting panic that follows questionable decisions
• Friendship sleepovers and tired-mom mornings
• Casino jackpots and slot-machine theories
• Organization as a personality trait
• The surprising joy of doing absolutely nothing

Plus:
• Dennis Rodman rookie cards
• Airport TV deals
• Executive muffs
• Yoga etiquette
• Sports-card obsessions
...

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen and Missy accidentally stumble into one of their most thoughtful conversations yet.

What starts with professional organizers, labeled pantries, casino jackpots, and tanning-bed nostalgia turns into a debate about boredom, productivity guilt, and whether modern parents are trying too hard to make childhood magical.

The farmers discuss:

• Why kids do not need to be entertained every second of summer
• The surprising value of boredom
• How adults forget how to rest
• Whether struggle actually builds character
• Why "rot days" might be one of the health...

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen and Missy discuss Pokémon art obsessions, potential live podcast, Lake Powell spirituality, sobriety milestones, creepy internet men, dangling throat anatomy, and the very real importance of hobbies. Standard farmer business.

The girls get into:

• Turning childhood interests into adult joy

• Why women lose their identities

• Emotional weight of old photos

• Internet trolls and creepy comment sections

• Whether OnlyFans performers count as sex workers.

Plus:

• Matching podcast shirts

• Custom Pokémon binders

• Live podcast ambit...

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen and Missy discuss prison politics, tanning beds, Pokémon conventions, emotional support sound bowls, weird wellness products, terrifying parking lots, and the deeply unhinged contents of Gretchen’s Notes app burn book.

The girls spiral through:

• Why women can never relax alone in public

• Pokémon collector culture

• Whether tanning beds are making a comeback

• Childhood books that were way too dark

• The emotional devastation of school spirit weeks.

Plus:

• Oura Ring regret

• Suspicious MLM encounters

This week on The Nut Farm, Gretchen and Missy spiral through motherhood, mental health, marriage hypotheticals, WAG culture, swingers, sound healing, sports streaming rage, and one absolutely unhinged story involving a lost tampon and an ASU quarterback.

Normal stuff.

The girls unpack emotional burnout, stress living in the body, and what it actually looks like to support your friends through hard seasons — before immediately pivoting into questions like:

• Would you marry someone who killed somebody?

• Could you date a bisexual man?

• Are swingers ever actually equally into it?

• And...

What do Little League parents, luxury handbags, horse racing, Pokémon treasure hunts, and a "late husband's wedding band" all have in common?

Absolutely nothing.

Which is exactly why this episode works.

This week, Gretchen and Missy get surprisingly real about one of the hardest parts of parenting: raising resilient kids without crushing their spirit. They talk discipline, disappointment, emotional meltdowns, sports parents, and the delicate balance between gentle parenting and preparing kids for the real world.

Then, naturally, an Oura Ring sparks one of the funniest conversations of the episode a...

Sometimes all it takes is one innocent conversation about Pringles to end up discussing Michael Jackson, casino etiquette, $500 baseball bats, naked meditation, and whether a scratch-off ticket counts as legal tender.

This week, Gretchen and Missy take a girls' night to the casino (where one of them is suspiciously lucky and the other is just trying not to get touched by strangers), discover that "lining your lips" is apparently part of the casino dress code, and officially name their favorite place on Earth: Cassie.

They also debate one of pop culture's most complicated questions after...

Season 3 is officially open, and absolutely nothing has changed—which is exactly how we like it.

This week Gretchen and Missy manage to connect six contractor bags full of clothes, Pokémon vending-machine stakeouts, casino heartbreak, prison pockets, Greenland sharks, gay twin brothers, earbud etiquette, and numerology into one completely normal conversation.

Along the way you'll learn why Gretchen has declared a shopping freeze after discovering she apparently owns every shirt ever made, why Missy's family has quietly entered the Pokémon black market, and why Eli pulling one tiny trading card instantly became a core...

SEASON TWO FINALE

Horses are pregnant for just shy of a year

Trafficked story

Prison pocket

Update on “man” / r*tard, Brandon Novak (Jackass person)

Summer House

Excuse the sound difficulties ... We are a work in progress.

Turtlenecks on men

Full circle moment with Chris - @breakthroughpodofficial

Tiger Woods

Taryn Manning

Calling out sick

Fan Mail Q & A

Double suits

March Madness - Iowa game

Surrender experiment

Mexico

Justin Timberlake police cam

Cart racing

Bachelorette

Age talk in relationships

Family feast

Man gawk

Soccer girls and tats

Music for moods

Surrender

Forgotten Story

Our lines - adolescents and adulthood

YouTube channels we subscribe to & Pods

Ankle

Anniversaries & Wedding

Have you ever peed your pants or the bed?

Delulu

@crystaldawnalchemy4 books - Mary Magdalene. The Surrender Experiment

Dying kids hair

Summer plans

Parasites

Ex-plants

Weakness

Kanna chews

What are we taking right now

Pets

Solo trip - Snowboarding in Flagstaff, Rivian commercial, psychic, Sedona, being alone, mental certification

Prescott

Recap Olympics

Spring Training

New G Soul Co.

Facilitator support

Origination of curse words

Snowboarding

Go Big - G Soul Co & Sawyer last pregnancy push

Potters wheel

Mummy’s

Olympics

Bad Bunny / Super Bowl

Kim Kardashian and Lewis Hamilton

G squad appreciation that is forming

Death wishes

Gut Reset -  @eatwellwithmichelleaz  (YouTube) @eatwell_withmichelle (IG)

Waste Management Phoenix Open

Flu Z

Missy Gets Bangs

F*ck Ice

Schiaparelli

Sports Psychology Certification

Dino Video -  @Ethanfreq

Kendall Jenner and Devin Booker comment exchange

Next Door read

Cactus Cup

Narcan & Deescalation Training

Dresses with Pockets

Hot Girls Eat Arbys

Chosen Paws

Next Door ish

Golden Globes

Guy Fieri Party

Red Light Masks

Haus of GS

Go Bills - Bill Mafia

Wish I was from Brooklyn - stars from Brooklyn

Smash or pass 2026 trends from Pinterest

Button Hook play call

Viome

Vegas for Missy's bday

Post office - Oh he’s a big boy

American apparel advertising

Alex Earle and Tom Brady

Audi Crooks Iowa

Niagara Falls

Teleprompter fun

Shameful trends - mesh tops, Rocket Dogs, Crocheted Hats

Toys for tatas

Taylor Swift documentary

Phoenix Suns