The Quiet As Kept Podcast With Shawnti B.
Join host Shawnti Boswell, Master Certified Mental Health Coach, author the best-selling book, "Quiet As Kept", and journaling enthusiast, as she introduces The Quiet as Kept Podcast. In this first episode, Shawnti shares her personal journey of overcoming severe depression and anxiety, discusses the purpose of the podcast, and sets the stage for what’s to come.This podcast is a safe space to unpack the conversations we, especially in the African American community, were told to avoid. From mental health and generational trauma to self-love and journaling for healing, Shawnti keeps it real, relatable, and rooted in the belief th...
Bonus Episode: I've Been There, Too: The Abuse You Couldn't See | Signs of Domestic Abuse
I've Been There, Too: The Abuse You Couldn't See
The Quiet As Kept Podcast | Wellness Wednesday Bonus Episode
I always tell people that I don't talk about things I haven't experienced. And when it comes to domestic violence, I mean that.
In this special Wellness Wednesday episode, I'm stepping away from my usual coaching conversations to share something personal.
I've experienced physical abuse, mental abuse, controlling behavior, and financial abuse. And here's something I don't think we talk about enough: I didn't fully recognize some of what I...
S3:Ep 8- Who Taught You That You Weren't Enough?
Who taught you that you weren’t enough?
Because you certainly weren’t born believing it.
Somewhere along the way, somebody’s words, rejection, criticism, or inability to love you properly made you start questioning your worth.
In Episode 8 of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Boswell is getting into the uncomfortable truth about how childhood experiences, family dysfunction, bullying, and unhealthy relationships shape the way we see ourselves.
We’re also talking about how emotional and psychological abuse can slowly destroy your confidence until somebody else’s voice becomes yo...
S3:EP7 WHEN YOUR FIRST BULLY WAS HOME
What happens when the first person who made you feel small wasn't a kid at school, but someone you loved?
In Episode 7 of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Boswell gets personal about what happens when criticism, fear, physical punishment, emotional neglect, unpredictability, or abuse becomes part of a child's definition of home.
Children don't always have the language to say, “This environment is affecting me.” They adapt. They become quiet, funny, perfect, independent, invisible, helpful, tough, or hyperaware of everybody else's mood.
Then those children grow up.
And sometimes the surv...
S3:EP6 SOME FAMILIES DON'T WANT YOU TO HEAL
What happens when healing starts changing the role you've always played in your family?
In Episode 6 of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Boswell gets into one of the hardest parts of healing: realizing that the people you love may not always support the healthier version of you.
Maybe your family taught you to keep quiet, forgive without accountability, protect the family image, tolerate disrespect, or keep showing up because “that's just what family does.” But when you start setting boundaries, telling the truth, questioning old patterns, and refusing to carry everybody else's mess, suddenly you...
S3:E5- THE COST OF PRETENDING YOU’RE OKAY
You can look good, show up, handle your responsibilities, take care of everybody else, and still be falling apart behind closed doors.
In Episode 5 of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Boswell gets into the cost of pretending you’re okay. What happens when “I’m fine” becomes your automatic answer? When being strong becomes your identity? When everybody sees the functioning version of you, but nobody knows what it costs you to keep her together?
And as October begins Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Shawnti takes the conversation deeper—because sometimes pretending you’re okay isn’...
Special Episode: The Hard Truths That Changed My Life.
Some lessons don’t come wrapped in pretty packages. Sometimes the truth hurts first and frees you later.
In this special episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Boswell gets personal about the hard truths that changed the way she sees herself, relationships, healing, boundaries, forgiveness, and choosing herself.
From realizing that everybody you love doesn’t deserve unlimited access to understanding that healing requires more than knowing why you are the way you are, Shawnti shares the truths she wishes she had understood sooner.
This isn’t an episode about having everyt...
S3:EP4 The Lies We Tell Ourselves to Stay Comfortable
Sometimes the person lying to you the most is you.
Not because you’re stupid. Not because you don’t see the red flags. But because telling yourself the full truth might require a decision you’re not ready to make.
“They’re trying.”
“It’s not that bad.”
“Nobody’s perfect.”
“They’ve just been through a lot.”
“I’m staying for the kids.”
“I’ve already invested too much.”
“Maybe I’m expecting too much.”
Sound familiar?
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Sh...
S3:EP3 YOU DIDN’T WANT LOVE. YOU WANTED TO FINALLY FEEL CHOSEN.
There is a difference between wanting to be loved and desperately needing to be chosen.
And when you’ve spent years feeling overlooked, rejected, abandoned, compared, or not good enough, somebody choosing you can feel like proof that you finally matter.
But being chosen does not automatically mean being loved well.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti B. gets raw about validation, rejection, attachment, overgiving, chasing emotionally unavailable people, accepting crumbs, and the dangerous ways we can confuse attention with affection and being wanted with being valued.
Dr...
S3:EP2 The Children We Used to Be Are Still Making Adult Decisions
You may be grown, paying bills, raising children, running businesses, setting goals, and handling your responsibilities, but how many of your adult decisions are still being influenced by a younger version of you?
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti B. goes deep into how childhood experiences can follow us into adulthood and quietly influence the way we love, argue, attach, trust, parent, people-please, shut down, and choose relationships.
Shawnti also opens up about her own childhood and the uncomfortable realization that some of the behaviors she once considered part of her...
S3:EP1 Who Would You Be If Nobody Hurt You?
How much of your personality is actually YOU and how much of it was built to protect you?
In the Season 3 premiere of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti B. asks one uncomfortable question: Who would you be if nobody hurt you?
We’re going beneath the labels we proudly wear—strong, independent, guarded, ambitious, unbothered, perfectionist, people pleaser—and asking where those traits actually came from.
Drawing from her memoir Quiet As Kept, Shawnti explores how childhood rejection, emotional neglect, bullying, abuse, disappointment, and the need to belong shaped the woman...
Season 2 Finale: The Rebrand Nobody Saw Coming
This season we've talked about emotional exhaustion, carrying invisible burdens, healing, peace, and what happens when you ignore yourself for too long.
Today, I'm pulling back the curtain.
This isn't just a conversation about rebranding my business.
It's a conversation about rebranding my life.
In this season finale of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, I'm sharing what has changed behind the scenes, lessons from divorce, what healing still looks like in real time, and why I've decided to stop performing strength and start embracing authenticity.
If you've been feeling...
S2:EP16 What Happens When You Ignore Yourself Too Long?
At some point, your mind, body, and spirit stop whispering.
They start screaming.
The anxiety.
The burnout.
The resentment.
The exhaustion.
The feeling that you've somehow lost yourself.
None of it happens overnight.
It happens when you've spent years ignoring your own needs while showing up for everyone else.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores the consequences of self-abandonment, why so many people lose themselves while trying to save everyone else, and how to begin reconnecting with the version of y...
S2:EP15 Peace Feels Foreign When Chaos Feels Familiar
Have you ever prayed for peace... and then felt uncomfortable when you finally got it?
Have you ever found yourself questioning healthy relationships, overthinking good situations, or creating problems where there weren't any?
You might not be addicted to drama.
You might be addicted to familiarity.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores why peace can feel unsettling when you've spent years surviving chaos. We'll discuss trauma, nervous system conditioning, self-sabotage, hypervigilance, and the uncomfortable truth that healing often feels boring before it feels beautiful.
<...S2:E14 The Truth About Emotional Exhaustion
You slept.
You took a day off.
You tried to rest.
So why are you still tired?
Because not all exhaustion is physical.
Sometimes your body isn't asking for sleep. It's asking for relief.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores emotional exhaustion—the kind of tired that doesn't go away after a nap. We'll discuss the signs people miss, what research says about chronic emotional stress, how emotional exhaustion affects your relationships and self-worth, and why so many high-functioning people are se...
S2:EP13-The Mental Load Nobody Sees
Everyone can see when you're physically tired.
What they don't see is the mental load you're carrying every single day.
The appointments. The deadlines. The worries. The emotional labor. The constant responsibility of being the one everyone depends on.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores the invisible weight so many people carry while still showing up, smiling, and functioning. We'll discuss what the mental load really is, how it impacts mental health, why so many women find themselves emotionally exhausted, and what healing looks like when you've...
S2:EP12 Healing Ain’t Pretty… But Staying Stuck Ain’t Cute Either
Healing isn’t aesthetic. It’s uncomfortable, messy, emotional, and deeply personal.
In this episode, Shawnti Refuge closes out Mental Health Awareness Month with a raw conversation about what healing actually requires: accountability, honesty, boundaries, grief, and the willingness to stop romanticizing survival mode.
If you’ve been saying you want peace, growth, or healing—but keep repeating the same cycles. This episode is your wake-up call.
Because healing isn’t always pretty… but staying stuck will cost you your peace.
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Shawnti Bo...
S2:EP 11 You Can Love Your Mother and Still Need to Heal From Her
Not every mother-daughter relationship feels safe, and that’s a truth many people struggle to say out loud.
In this episode, Shawnti Refuge unpacks the complexity of loving your mother while still needing healing, boundaries, or distance. From emotional neglect to generational trauma, this conversation explores the “mother wound” and the silent guilt that often comes with it.
If you’ve ever felt conflicted, hurt, or unsure how to navigate your relationship with your mother—this episode will help you make sense of it.
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Shawn...
S2:EP10 The Pressure to Be a Good Mother Will Break You If You Let It
Motherhood is praised publicly… and suffered through privately.
In this episode, Shawnti Refuge gets real about the emotional weight of being “a good mother” and how unrealistic expectations, silent pressure, and unprocessed trauma can slowly break you down.
Backed by research and lived experience, this conversation dives into mom guilt, burnout, identity loss, and the mental load that nobody talks about—especially in communities where strength is expected and struggle is hidden.
If you’ve ever questioned whether you’re doing enough… while running on empty—this episode is for you.
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S2:EP9 You Say You’re Fine… But Your Body Knows You’re Not
Everybody keeps saying they’re “fine.”
But anxiety is loud. Burnout is real. And functioning doesn’t mean you’re okay.
In this episode, I’m breaking down what mental health actually looks like when you’re the one everybody depends on. The strong one. The reliable one. The one who “got it.”
Because just because you’re showing up doesn’t mean you’re not silently drowning.
We’re talking high-functioning anxiety, emotional suppression, survival mode, and what your body starts doing when your mind keeps ignoring what’s real.
If you’ve been pushing thro...
S2:E8- EMOTIONAL SPRING CLEANING-Let It Go for Real This Time: Closure, Release, and Choosing Yourself
You’ve acknowledged it.
You’ve faced it.
Now it’s time to release it.
In this final episode of the Emotional Spring Cleaning series, we’re talking about what it actually means to let go—for real. Not just saying “I’m done,” but emotionally detaching, reclaiming your power, and choosing yourself without guilt.
Because closure doesn’t always come from them.
Sometimes it comes from you deciding you’re no longer carrying what hurt you.
If you’ve been holding on to people, pain, memories, or versions of yourself that no longer a...
S2:E7- Emotional Spring Cleaning: You’re Not Confused… You’re Avoiding It: The Truth You Keep Running From
Let’s be honest… you already know.
You know what hurt you.
You know what didn’t sit right.
You know what you should’ve walked away from.
But instead of facing it… you stayed busy, distracted, and “focused on other things.”
In this episode, we’re unpacking emotional avoidance—the habits, distractions, and behaviors that keep you from actually dealing with what’s real. Because staying busy is not the same as healing.
If you’ve been saying “I’m just trying not to think about it,” this is your sign that it’s time to...
S2:E6- Emotional Spring Cleaning: It’s Not Them… It’s the Pattern: Why You Keep Attracting the Same Energy
You keep saying it’s different this time… but it keeps ending the same way.
Different person. Same outcome. Same feelings. Same frustration.
In this episode, we’re breaking down the emotional patterns you keep repeating in your relationships—whether that’s romantic, friendships, or even family. Because it’s not always about who you’re choosing… it’s about what you haven’t healed.
We’re talking about attachment, emotional habits, unconscious cycles, and why your nervous system keeps choosing what feels familiar—even when it hurts.
This is the episode that’s going to...
S2:EP5- Emotional Spring Cleaning: You Keep Calling It Strength… But It’s Emotional Hoarding
You’ve been holding it together for everybody… but who’s holding space for you?
In this episode, we’re unpacking what it really looks like to carry unprocessed emotions, unresolved pain, and old survival habits that no longer serve you. Just because you’ve learned how to function through it doesn’t mean you’ve healed from it.
This is your wake-up call to stop romanticizing your resilience and start releasing what’s been weighing you down.
If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, easily triggered, emotionally tired, or disconnected… this episode is for you.
We’re...
EP4: High-Functioning but Highly Unhealed
High-Functioning but Highly Unhealed
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores the emotional reality many high-achieving women face — appearing successful on the outside while quietly carrying emotional exhaustion on the inside.
This conversation addresses high-functioning depression, burnout, emotional suppression, and the pressure women feel to keep everything together. Shawnti also discusses the importance of slowing down, self-awareness, and creating space for healing.
Subscribe to the podcast and explore Shawnti’s guided journals and resources at ShawntiRefuge.com.
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Su...
S2:EP3 Mother Wounds, Silent Grief & Becoming the Woman You Needed
In this Women’s History Month episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores one of the quietest and most complicated forms of grief women carry — the mother wound.
What happens when the person who was supposed to nurture you couldn’t?
What does healing look like when your mother is still alive, but the relationship is painful, distant, or unresolved?
In this raw conversation, Shawnti discusses emotional neglect, generational trauma, silent grief, and the journey of becoming the nurturing presence you needed growing up. She also shares powerful reflections on repa...
S2:EP2 Healing Isn’t Pretty: The Rage Women Were Never Allowed to Feel
Healing Isn’t Pretty: The Rage Women Were Never Allowed to Feel
In this Women’s History Month episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores the anger women were taught to suppress and how that suppressed rage often turns into anxiety, burnout, and emotional exhaustion.
This episode discusses emotional suppression, boundary setting, and the role anger plays in the healing process.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
• Guided journals and healing resources
• Quiet as Kept by Shawnti Refuge
• The Audacity of a Healing Woman
• The Free 5-Da...
S2:E1 THE AUDACITY OF A HEALING WOMAN
In this Women’s History Month episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge unpacks the hidden emotional cost of being the “strong woman.” If you’ve ever been praised for holding it together while quietly falling apart, this episode is for you.
We’re talking mental load, suppressed rage, generational trauma, divorce survival mode, and the audacity to heal out loud.
🎯 Join the FREE 5-Day Audacity Challenge
🎯 Enroll in The Audacity of a Healing Woman
🎯 Grab your copy of Quiet as Kept
🎯 Shop guided journals at ShawntiRefugeJournals.com
Subscribe. Share. Heal...
FEB26-EP4: I’m Not Reinventing Myself. I’m Returning.
Birthdays often come with pressure—to be further along, more healed, or completely reinvented. But healing doesn’t work on deadlines.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge reflects on birthday month energy, integration, and what it means to return to yourself instead of constantly trying to become someone new. Through thoughtful reflection and guided journaling prompts, this episode invites listeners to release unrealistic expectations and honor the versions of themselves that survived.
✨ Topics include:
Healing without timelinesIntegration vs. reinventionLetting go of birthday pressureGuided journaling for self-honorGo to Shawnt...
FEB26- EP3: Self-Abandonment Isn’t a Personality Trait
Self-abandonment often gets mislabeled as being “too nice,” “too accommodating,” or “just the way you are”—but it’s actually a learned survival response.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores how self-abandonment forms, why choosing yourself can feel uncomfortable, and how to begin prioritizing your needs without guilt or emotional shutdown. This episode includes reflective journaling prompts and grounded insight for anyone healing from people-pleasing, burnout, or emotional overgiving.
✨ Topics include:
What self-abandonment really looks likeWhy prioritizing yourself feels unsafeSelf-respect vs. self-sacrificeGuided journaling for boundary awarenessVisit ShawntiRefugeJourn...
FEB26-2Self-Trust After You’ve Been Let Down (By Others and Yourself)
Rebuilding self-trust after burnout, betrayal, or self-abandonment can feel overwhelming—especially when survival mode taught you to doubt your own instincts.
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores how self-trust gets broken, why shame keeps it fractured, and how to rebuild internal safety through compassion, consistency, and small promises to yourself. This episode includes reflective journaling prompts and grounded insights for anyone navigating healing, decision fatigue, or identity after survival mode.
✨ Topics include:
Self-trust vs. confidenceSurvival mode and decision-makingHealing shame and self-blameGuided journaling for emotional safetySend us Fan...
FEB26-1-Who Am I When I’m Not Performing?
Who are you when you’re not performing for survival, approval, or productivity?
In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast, Shawnti Refuge explores how performance becomes a survival strategy—and why slowing down can feel uncomfortable when your nervous system is used to staying alert. This conversation invites listeners to examine identity beyond roles, productivity, and people-pleasing, and to reconnect with self without pressure or expectation.
Through honest reflection and guided journaling prompts, this episode creates space for rest, self-awareness, and emotional release for anyone navigating burnout, healing, or life after surv...
2026 EP7: Better Me Is Quieter. Clearer. Unavailable.
The healed version of you doesn’t argue—she moves differently. In the final episode of the New Year, Better Me series, Shawnti reflects on peace, detachment, clarity, and choosing yourself without explanation. This is about integration, not reinvention.
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Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness. After overcoming severe depression and anxiety through journaling, Shawnti developed her own program, empowering individuals to heal...
2026 EP6: Discipline Is Self-Respect, Not Punishment
Healing still requires effort. This episode reframes discipline as devotion—not punishment—and challenges the idea that motivation alone leads to change. If you want peace that lasts, this conversation will help you build it intentionally.
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Support the show
Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness. After overcoming severe depression and anxiety through journaling, Shawnti developed her own program, empowering individuals to heal and thrive w...
2026 EP5: You’re Not Stuck. You’re Scared of What Healing Costs
What if you’re not stuck—just afraid? In this episode, Shawnti unpacks the fear of becoming someone new, outgrowing relationships, and losing identities rooted in pain. Healing has a cost, and this conversation names it.
Send us Fan Mail
Support the show
Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness. After overcoming severe depression and anxiety through journaling, Shawnti developed her own program, empowering individuals to heal and thrive w...
2026 EP4: Closure Is a Myth. Heal Anyway.
Waiting for closure keeps you tied to people who may never give it. This episode explores why healing doesn’t require apologies, understanding, or acknowledgment—and how waiting can quietly delay your growth. This is a grounding conversation about reclaiming your power without permission.
Send us Fan Mail
Support the show
Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness. After overcoming severe depression and anxiety through journaling, Shawnti developed her own...
2026 EP3: Being “Strong” Is Not a Flex
Being the strong one is praised—but rarely supported. In this episode, Shawnti talks about survival mode, burnout, and the emotional cost of always holding it together. If rest feels unsafe and exhaustion feels normal, this conversation is for you.
Send us Fan Mail
Support the show
Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness. After overcoming severe depression and anxiety through journaling, Shawnti developed her own program, empowering indivi...
2026 EP2: You Don’t Need Another Affirmation. You Need Boundaries.
Affirmations without boundaries don’t work—and this episode tells the truth about why. Shawnti explores how guilt, access, and emotional over-availability keep people stuck, even when they’re “doing the work.” This conversation challenges the idea that healing is soft and exposes the discomfort required to protect your peace.
Send us Fan Mail
Support the show
Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness. After overcoming severe depression and anxiety th...
2026 EP1: New Year, Same You: Be For Real
New year, same patterns? Let’s talk about it.
In this episode, Shawnti Refuge cuts through the motivation fluff and gets honest about why so many people repeat years instead of changing their lives. This conversation is about comfort, avoidance, survival mode, and the quiet lies we tell ourselves to stay familiar. If you’ve been saying “this is my year” but nothing feels different, this episode will sit with you.
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Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, K...
Healing Through The Holidays Episode 6: Reclaiming Your Peace for the New Year
The new year isn’t about resolutions — it’s about reclamation. In this powerful finale to the Healing Through the Holidays series, Shawnti Refuge guides listeners through reflection, release, and rebirth. Learn how to reclaim your peace, embody your healing, and prepare to step into The Audacity of a Healing Woman beginning January 14.
✍🏾 JOURNAL PROMPTS
Let’s write this out together, sis.
What am I ready to stop fighting for that was never meant for me?What am I reclaiming in this next season — my time, voice, body, joy, or peace?What does “audacity” look like in my heali...Healing Through the Holidays Episode 5: Self-Care Ain’t Selfish
Self-care is not selfish. It’s sacred. In this soothing episode, Shawnti Refuge reminds us that true rest is a form of resistance. Through storytelling and guided prompts, she shares how to release guilt, reset your energy, and build new rituals of nourishment during the holiday season.
✍🏾 JOURNAL PROMPTS
Grab your journal, love. Let’s check in with your body and spirit:
What does my body need from me right now — rest, movement, nourishment, stillness?Where have I been neglecting myself in the name of being “strong”?What small act of self-care can I commit to every d...