Earwash

Earwash's filmpod miniseries continues: today we're discussing Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back with Jennifer Cash, who really approve of Darth Vader's family values

Earwash takes a detour into the filmpod genre, with raconteur Geoffrey Twatt-Face joining us to discuss Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, and drop a few names down the conversational thermal exhaust port

The Earwig joins us today to answer some Emergency Questions, giving rise to discussions of cat-based distractions, whether insects are more problematic than Kevin Spacey, and what exactly the Earwig was up to in 2016

Sink your ears into a bath of sound, courtesy of Earwash. Today's bath contains some interesting words that Douglas has come across, and their meanings. Expect language both Wodehousian and veterinary, as well as a rather kinky French phrase

Eroticist Jonathan Crepuscular has an all-new creative project that he wants to run by Dogulas, and this one has a (washing) basketload of potential

Today we are joined by raconteur Geoffrey Twatt-Face to answer some Emergency Questions

The Rooster's Calling… but why?

Music: "HeadSound", provided by MobyGratis.

Additional rooster motives by Erin Arnett

Allow your ears and mind to be freshened by today's auditory breath mint, this week flavoured with nonsense from Douglas's notebooks

Eroticist Jonathan Crepuscular presents his new idea for a podcast. It sounds… familiar

Today we are joined by insect athlete Kevin the Centipede to answer some Emergency Questions. Listen on to hear an insectoid view on Bigfoots (Bigfeet?), hotels and embarrassing injuries

Today we are joined by a new guest: raconteur, former politician and professional dilettante Geoffrey Twatt-Face

Today your auditory shampoo shall be some oddments from Douglas's notebooks

Douglas has discovered the Earwash download statistics, and has decided to take a ramble through them. Who knows, it might even be interesting

Chef Ludwig joins us at the Earwash winter retreat to answer, in his distinctly revolting way, some Emergency Questions

Safely ensconced back in Earwash HQ, Douglas and country musician Bruce Plank compare notes on their time on the road. Topics of conversation include, but are not limited to, unexpected kangaroo cuddles, setting up dating app profiles for local landmarks, and non-standard uses for frozen cucumbers

It's time for another bath in the oddities of Douglas's notebook. Topics arising to discuss later with your therapist include shovels, the MILF siren, and Miss Shilling's Orifice (which is not what you think it is)

The Earwig explains what use he's put Douglas's house to while Douglas has been away

ASMR artist Adrian 'Mesopotamia' River-Rivers jojns us to answer some Emergency Questions, with talk of cheese, maths and giants

Omni-critics Horace Perrault drops in to the Earwash winter retreat to share his review of the Latrobe Valley

Jonathan Crepuscular joins us at the Earwash winter retreat to tell us exactly how he lost his job at Woolworths, which supermarket is most tolerant of his sheer unbridled sensuality, and the unexpected role he was asked to play in an ongoing international crisis

Earwash returns from its unplanned hiatus with an ultra-cleansing epsiode of weird things Douglas has written in his notebooks. Expect running themes of nuns, slugs and onions, and possibly the distant sounds of rodent lovemaking

Omni-critic Horace Perrault answers some emergency questions, with answers that encompass starch, annoying the English and communicating with cats

Today's value pack is extra large, encompassing nearly an hour. And what does that ear-hour contain? Excessive postmodernism, guys talking about their feelings, musical interludes, oddments from Douglas's notebooks, and a slow-talking snail. The quintessential Earwash experience

How will Earwash mark it's third birthday? You'll just have to listen and find out...

Eroticist Jonathan Crepuscular was meant to join us today to talk about his search for a job, but instead he takes us on a tangent involving naked rollerskaters, sexually ambiguous actors, and the eroticism of Sean Connery's receding hairline

This week's value pack contains such diverse contents as words, worms, pizza and a discussion of TikTok that is very out of date. Bon appetit

This week we are joined by Horace Perrault, critic of everything, who has some thoughts about ANZAC Day

Today's value pack is a six pack; six episodes, six very diferent listening experiences, but all alike in oddness

Another value pack is on the discount shelf today, containing five episodes for the price of one. May contain traces of: Italian plumbers, piscine light features and American politics

Today the Earwig answers some Emergency Questions, and the chat covers such diverse topics as dung beetles, immortality via animated TV shows and insectoid perceptions of colour

This week's Value Pack, half-hidden amongst the heavily discounted Easter eggs, is unseasonably seasonal - it contains episodes relating to Christmas and New Year's Eve, as well as a stale meme and an episode I really regret

Chef Ludwig Rinder­kennzeichnungs-und-Rindfleisch­etikettierungs­überwachungs­aufgaben­übertragungs­gesetz explains exactly what happened with his restaurant's now-infamous Easter menu…

This week's Earwash Value Pack has something to suit every taste, as long as you define 'every' narrowly to include only satire by AI, a critique of the nature of God, failed true crime podcasts and free-form weirdness

As it's Easter Sunday, Earwash is going a bit more respectable this week with an intellectually improving selection of interesting words and their definitions from Douglas's notebooks. But this being Earwash, there's also a disturbingly named cactus. Happy Easter

This week's value pack is worth its weight in centipede drumsticks, as it contains both the first appearance of Keven the Centipede and Earwash's exclusive coverage of the 2023 Centipede Cup. In other words, this is Earwash at its finest

In this week's misophonic nightmare, a new guest drops in. His name is Adrian, he makes ASMR, and he has a very gentle voice. So listen in, and be soothed by the dulcet tones of Mr A. S. M. R-R

Wednesdays are bin night around Douglas's area, so it's only fitting that Wednesday is also the day that the Earwash value packs are dumped on your feed on Wednesdays as well. Today's torn bin bag of a podcast contains notebook nonsense, American nonsense and country music nonsense

This week Douglas's American neighbour Jennifer answers some Emergency Questions, giving us her thoughts on the meaning of life, the funniest thing that has ever happened to her at a funeral, and her most appealing habit

You can really taste the savings in this week's value pack, containing such diverse ingredients as Silverfish mating rituals, the first appearance of omni-critic Horace Perrault, and the most ominous skincare ad ever

This week Douglas make another attempt at breaking into the lucrative "three guys talking about nothing" style of podcasting with a new lineup of one chef, one insect and one Douglas. I know the title of this one sounds like an innuendo but for once in the history of this podcast we have here an episode containing not a single double entendre