The Whole Parent Podcast
Welcome to 'The Whole Parent Podcast,' where we dive deep into evidence-based parenting strategies, blending cutting-edge psychology with real-world experience. Each episode offers insightful discussions, expert interviews, and practical tips to empower you and your family through the joys and challenges of raising children. Join us as we explore not just the highs of parenting, but navigate the complexities and embrace the journey together.
Raising Capable Kids (with Lenore Skenazy) #103
What if the biggest threat to your child's development isn't screen time, social media, or even the dangers we're constantly trying to protect them from? What if it's the fact that we're not letting them do anything on their own?
Today, I'm joined by Lenore Skenazy, founder of the Free-Range Kids movement, president of Let Grow, and the woman once labeled "America's Worst Mom" for letting her nine-year-old ride the New York City subway alone.
We're raising what might be the most supervised generation of children in history. Kids are expected to perform...
Your Kid Isn't a Perfectionist. They're Afraid... #102
Want to know if your kid is an HSK? TAKE THE QUIZ 👇
https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/66676edb5288b4a99ab96f52
Have you ever watched your child completely fall apart over something that seemed incredibly small?
You said "maybe" instead of "yes." Their teacher corrected a spelling mistake. Plans changed. And suddenly, you're dealing with a full-blown meltdown.
It's tempting to think your child needs to toughen up, learn to handle disappointment, or stop being such a perfectionist. But what if you're misunderstanding what's actually happening in their brain?
In...
ADHD: Get it done and HAVE FUN (with Kim and Penn Holderness) #101
“You know how to do this, so why can’t you just do it?” That sentence haunts a lot of ADHD kids and the parents who are trying their best. I sit down with Kim and Penn Holderness, award-winning creators and bestselling authors, to name what’s actually missing: executive function, working memory, and the brutal reality that starting can be the hardest step.
We get practical fast. We talk why chores and hygiene can feel harder than creative work, how boredom can feel like physical pain, and how shame builds when adults moralize mess or assume disrespe...
How to Stop Hitting, Biting, or Teasing (Episode 100!!)
What do you do when your five-year-old won’t stop hitting? Your three-year-old keeps biting? Or your older kid has discovered that getting their younger sibling in trouble is apparently the funniest thing on earth?
For episode 100, I’m doing something different.
I’m bringing you directly into one of my live Parent Lab group coaching calls: real parents, real problems, and my real-time answers.
We talk about why a child who knows not to bite may keep doing it anyway, what to do when one sibling deliberately pushes another sibling’s buttons, why hitt...
Raising Conscious Sons And Daughters (with Dr. Shefali) #99
Today on the Whole Parent Podcast we bring back friend of the show Dr. Shafali to talk about about why she wrote Raising Conscious Sons and Raising Conscious Daughters right now and why the parenting crisis is being intensified by algorithms that target kids at the level of biology.Â
CLICK HERE to get Raising Conscious Sons
CLICK HERE to get Raising Conscious Daughters
We break down what boys and girls are up against and how we can respond with conscious parenting that builds real competence, real safety, and a stronger inner self:
Training Wheels Are A Menace (with Strider Bike Founder Ryan McFarland) #98
Watching your kid learn to ride a bike can feel weirdly intense. It looks like a simple childhood skill, but it pokes at something bigger: our fear of seeing our kids struggle, our urge to step in, and the thin line between support and rescue. I sit down with Ryan McFarland, founder of Strider Bikes, to talk about why this milestone is so emotional and why it can shape a child’s confidence far beyond two wheels.
Ryan built the first Strider balance bike in his garage for his two-year-old son, then watched how mobility changed everything: fo...
Survival Of The... Friendliest? (with Jessica Joelle Alexander) #97
Denmark shows up near the top of the Happiness Index year after year, yet it is not topping every academic ranking or outspending everyone else. So what is going on? We talk with author, speaker, and cultural researcher Jessica Joelle Alexander about the Danish Way of Parenting and why Danish children are so often described as secure, resilient, and genuinely happy.
We dig into the simplest but most overlooked driver of well being: meaningful relationships. From hygge and “weefulness” to collaboration over comparison, Jessica explains how Danish culture builds connection on purpose and how that changes the way...
Honest Motherhood (With Libby Ward) #96
This conversation on honest motherhood explains why so many parents feel like they’re disappearing—and what actually helps.
If you’ve ever snapped at your kids, felt crushed by the mental load, or wondered why parenting feels so much harder than everyone else makes it look, this episode with Libby Ward (Diary of an Honest Mom) will hit deeply. We talk about people-pleasing, perfectionism, emotional regulation, childhood trauma, mom guilt, resentment, and the invisible pressure many parents carry every day. Most importantly, we unpack how self-abandonment quietly fuels burnout—and why meeting your own needs is not self...
Parenting A Spicy One (with Mary Van Geffen) #95
In this conversation, parenting coach Mary Van Geffen explains why “spicy kids” don’t respond to traditional discipline—and what actually helps instead.
If your child refuses to listen, melts down over small things, pushes back on everything, or seems emotionally intense all day long, this episode will help you understand what’s really happening beneath the behavior. We talk about emotional regulation, ADHD and PDA traits, shame cycles, demand avoidance, connection vs. control, and why some kids need a completely different parenting approach. This is a grounded, practical conversation for overwhelmed parents who are exhausted by yelling, p...
DILF Dad I'd Like to Friend (with Kevin Seldon) #94
In this Father’s Day conversation, we unpack the hidden mental health struggles of modern fatherhood, from postpartum anxiety in dads to feeling isolated, shut out, or unsure how to bond with your baby.
If you’ve ever felt like parenting changed your identity, strained your relationship, or left you quietly struggling while everyone focused on the baby, this episode will hit home. Jon sits down with Kevin Seldon — founder of Dad Supporting Dads and author of The DILF Handbook — to talk about the emotional realities of fatherhood, why so many men suffer silently, and how better support...
I Can Do It (With Mama Nous) #93
Toddler emotional regulation feels impossible some days—especially when your child melts down over socks, refuses to listen, or completely falls apart at bedtime. In this conversation with Mama Nous, we talk about why music can calm tantrums, reduce power struggles, and actually help kids build confidence and resilience in everyday moments.
If you’ve ever wondered how to help your toddler cooperate without yelling, how to stay calm during hard parenting moments, or why emotionally intelligent songs seem to “work” when nothing else does, this episode connects the neuroscience with real life. We talk about toddler meltdown...
The Thing MORE important than Emotional Regulation (with Dr Ross Greene) #92
In this conversation with Dr. Ross Greene, we unpack why so many kids struggle with frustration, big emotions, and power struggles… and why the usual parenting advice often makes things worse.
If you’ve ever wondered why your child explodes over small things, refuses to cooperate, or seems overwhelmed by everyday expectations, this episode will completely shift how you see challenging behavior. We talk about toddler tantrums, emotional regulation, frustration tolerance, ADHD, anxiety, school stress, collaborative problem solving, and why kids do well if they can—not when we punish them hard enough. This is a practical, resear...
The REAL thing leading to mental disorders in kids and teens (not technology) with Dr. Peter Gray #91
In this conversation with Dr. Peter Gray, we unpack what may actually be driving the mental health crisis in kids—and why so many parents still feel overwhelmed trying to help.
If you’ve ever wondered whether technology is really the problem, why your child seems more stressed than you remember being as a kid, or how modern parenting and schooling may be affecting emotional regulation, independence, and resilience… this episode will challenge a lot of assumptions in the best way. We talk about toddler and preschool behavior, autonomy, anxiety, school stress, emotional health, and what kids actual...
Is it HARMFUL to Ask Older Siblings to Help? #90
A viral clip says that telling your older child to “help your sister” damages both kids. I get why that message spreads fast, especially if you grew up as the oldest and felt like too much landed on your shoulders. But developmental psychology is more nuanced than a scroll-stopping soundbite, and mixing up parentification with age-appropriate help can leave parents stuck and anxious about every request they make.
I break down what the research actually supports: yes, it can be unhealthy when an older child feels like the parent, carries ongoing responsibility, or becomes the default caregiver. That...
MOTHER'S DAY Shenanigans with Emily Vondy #89
Toddler parenting feels hardest when your child won’t listen, melts down over everything, or you’re running on empty trying to stay calm through the chaos. In this Mother’s Day conversation with Emily Vondy, we talk honestly about what parenting little kids actually feels like—and why so many overwhelmed parents feel both exhausted and deeply grateful at the same time.
From toddler tantrums and emotional overwhelm to screen time, mom guilt, nap traps, and the hilarious reality of raising little kids, this episode is full of relatable moments and grounded parenting wisdom. If you’ve ever hi...
The Thing Hijacking Your Kid's Brain With Michaeleen Doucleff #88
If your toddler refuses to listen, has big meltdowns after screens, or seems obsessed with “just one more,” this video will help you understand what’s really going on beneath the behavior. We break down how dopamine drives your child’s need for more—not because they love it, but because their brain is being pulled into a loop. You’ll learn how this affects emotional regulation, why transitions feel so explosive, and what to do instead of constant limiting, negotiating, or power struggles.
What You’ll Learn:
 Why your child’s brain treats screens and snack...Why Smart Kids Shut Down In School #87
Homeschool vs traditional school: a former principal explains what helps kids learn (and what gets in the way).
If your child is melting down after school, refusing to listen, or suddenly “shutting down” around learning, this conversation will likely hit close to home. We unpack what’s really happening beneath behaviors like school resistance, emotional outbursts, and loss of motivation—and how factors like environment, pacing, and lack of autonomy can quietly overwhelm kids. Whether you’re considering homeschooling or staying in the system, this episode gives you a clearer, research-informed lens on how kids actually learn and what t...
Do Schools Kill Curiosity? #86
Why some kids stop asking questions (and what to do at home to protect their curiosity).
If your child seems disengaged, says “I’m not good at this,” or melts down over learning, it’s easy to assume it’s about attention, behavior, or motivation. But often, what looks like defiance or lack of focus is actually a loss of curiosity. In this video, we break down what’s happening in your child’s brain when learning becomes about performance instead of exploration—and how that shift can lead to resistance, overwhelm, and disconnection from learning itself.
What You...
How To Deal With Your %&#$ So Your Kids Don't Have To #85
If you feel overwhelmed, snap more than you want to, or keep repeating parenting patterns you swore you’d break… this will explain why (and what to do instead).
Most parenting advice focuses on what to do when your toddler refuses to listen, has meltdowns, or pushes every limit. But what if the real challenge isn’t just their behavior, it’s what gets activated in you? In this conversation, we unpack why parenting can feel so triggering, how your own emotional patterns show up in daily moments, and how learning to regulate yourself can dramatically reduce power st...
Your Child Is Attaching to Someone (And It Might NOT be You) #84
Why kids stop listening to parents (and how to rebuild connection without power struggles or punishment).
If your child suddenly seems more influenced by friends, more sensitive to what others think, or harder to reach at home, you’re not imagining it. This video breaks down what’s actually happening beneath the surface when kids become more peer-focused, why it can lead to emotional instability, defiance, or withdrawal, and how to gently re-anchor your relationship without forcing control. If you're dealing with backtalk, disconnection, big emotions, or a child who just won’t listen anymore, this will help y...
Unconditional Parenting with Alfie Kohn #83
If you feel stuck in tantrums, power struggles, or constant “do this / don’t do that”… this shifts how you see it completely
Most parenting advice focuses on fixing behavior, timeouts, consequences, sticker charts, but what if that’s the very thing keeping you stuck? In this conversation, we unpack why common tools like rewards and punishments often lead to more resistance, more meltdowns, and less real cooperation over time. If your toddler refuses to listen, pushes boundaries, or seems “unmotivated” unless there’s a reward, this will help you understand what’s actually driving their behavior, and what to do ins...
Your Kid Needs Less Stuff #82
If your child jumps from toy to toy, asks for screens, or says “I’m bored” all day, this might be the real reason
If your toddler or preschooler seems overwhelmed, constantly switching activities, refusing to play independently, or needing you to step in all the time, it’s easy to assume they need more stimulation. But often, the opposite is true. Too many toys can lead to shorter attention spans, more meltdowns, and less meaningful play. In this video, we break down what’s actually happening in your child’s brain, and how simplifying your environment can reduce o...
Risky Play Might Save Your Kid #81
When to step in vs. hold back, so you don’t accidentally raise a more anxious, less capable kid
If your toddler is constantly climbing, jumping, or doing things that make your heart race, this video will help you understand what’s actually happening and what to do about it. We’re talking about risky play: why kids need it, how it builds real confidence (not just reassurance), and how overprotecting, often without realizing it, can lead to more anxiety, hesitation, and power struggles. If you’ve ever said “be careful” on repeat, worried about injuries, or felt judged...
The Secret to Raising Successful Kids #80
If your child resists helping, makes a bigger mess, or melts down during cleanup—this changes how you’ll see it.
If you’ve ever thought “it’s just faster if I do it myself,” you’re not alone. When your toddler refuses to listen, turns simple tasks into chaos, or has a meltdown over cleaning up, it can feel pointless to even try. But what looks like small, frustrating moments—spilled food, ignored requests, messy “helping”—are actually shaping your child’s emotional regulation, confidence, and long-term behavior in powerful ways. This video breaks down what research really says abo...
Strike Hard, Strike Fast, No Mercy (Jess + Jon) #79
Jess and Jon talk about tae kwon do, obedience, and navigating different cultural values with kids
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If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.
Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.
You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day...
Why your toddler keeps pushing boundaries (and what to do instead of repeating yourself all day) #78
If your 3–5 year old refuses to listen, tests every rule, and melts down when you get stricter… this is what’s actually going on...
If you feel like you’re saying the same thing 20 times a day—“stop jumping,” “come here,” “we’re leaving”—and your child still pushes back, this video will help you understand why. What looks like defiance or disrespect is actually a normal part of brain development, especially in toddlers and preschoolers. We’ll break down what’s happening beneath the behavior (impulse control, autonomy, emotional regulation) and why common strategies like repeating, warning, or getting stricter o...
The Courage to Be Disliked (and Why Your Child Needs It) #77
In this episode Jon explores the tension many modern parents feel between connection and control and why “validation is not the same thing as leadership.” He reframes one of the hardest identity shifts in parenting: having “the courage to be disliked” in the moments that matter most. Listeners will walk away with a clearer, calmer way to lead their kids through big emotions, without losing connection or authority.Â
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Attachment Styles with Thais Gibson #76
In this conversation, Jon Fogel and Thais Gibson delve into the complexities of attachment styles and their impact on relationships and parenting. Thais shares her personal journey from experiencing a fearful avoidant attachment style to understanding and teaching about attachment theory. They discuss the dynamics of different attachment styles, how they manifest in relationships, and the importance of self-awareness and emotional regulation. Thais provides practical tools for rewiring attachment wounds and emphasizes the significance of treating oneself well to foster healthier relationships. The conversation concludes with resources for further exploration and personal development.
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What If ODD Is A Cry For Autonomy... #75
In this episode, Jon speaks directly to parents worn down by constant power struggles—especially those navigating an ODD or PDA diagnosis—starting with the raw truth that holding the line often makes everything explode. Instead of doubling down on consistency or control, he reframes defiance as a nervous system response to perceived threat, not a character problem or a parenting failure. Listeners will walk away with relief, language for what’s really happening in these moments, and a steadier way to hold boundaries without becoming the enemy—grounded in safety, flexibility, and the radical idea that a child’s push for...
Should you make your child apologize? #74
In this episode, Jon slows down one of the most familiar parenting moments—“You need to say you’re sorry”—and asks what we’re actually teaching when we force an apology. Rather than treating “sorry” as proof of character or accountability, he explores what’s happening in a child’s brain when adults are tense, watching, and waiting for the right words. The episode reframes apologies not as a demand, but as one small part of repair, shifting the focus from appeasing adults to caring for the person who was hurt. Parents will leave with a clearer, calmer way to handle these...
Stop Telling Kids “Don’t Be Bossy”; Do This Instead #73
In this episode, Jon explores what we often call “bossy” behavior and reframes it as leadership energy colliding with an underdeveloped social brain. Through vivid playdate moments and real parent questions, he unpacks why telling kids to stop being bossy misses the point—and how correction can quietly turn into shame, especially for strong-willed kids. Parents will walk away with a clearer way to distinguish control from influence, language that builds social awareness without dulling confidence, and a grounded reminder that the goal isn’t to soften a child’s intensity, but to help them learn how to lead in ways ot...
Navigating Jealousy and Envy with Kids #72
This episode is for the parent quietly watching from the sidelines, wondering if their child is falling behind socially—or if they’re the only one who seems worried about it. We step into those moments where your kid hangs back, plays alone, gravitates toward adults, or misses social cues, and we slow the whole story down. Instead of rushing to labels or fixes, this conversation reframes social “lag” as temperament, context, and skill development unfolding on its own timeline. We explore how easily our own childhood wounds sneak into our fears, how extroversion gets mistaken for health, and why opti...
Is Your Kid "Falling Behind Socially"? #71
This episode is for the parent quietly watching from the sidelines, wondering if their child is falling behind socially—or if they’re the only one who seems worried about it. We step into those moments where your kid hangs back, plays alone, gravitates toward adults, or misses social cues, and we slow the whole story down. Instead of rushing to labels or fixes, this conversation reframes social “lag” as temperament, context, and skill development unfolding on its own timeline. We explore how easily our own childhood wounds sneak into our fears, how extroversion gets mistaken for health, and why opti...
When is it time to let your kids quit.... #70
In this episode, Jon sits with one of the most charged moments in parenting—the car door open, practice about to start, and a child saying, “I don’t want to do this anymore.” Through personal story and real parent questions, he explores why quitting is rarely about laziness or lack of grit, but about how kids experience overwhelm, unfairness, and frustration in their bodies.
Parents will walk away with a steadier way to tell the difference between healthy discomfort and too much, language for guiding kids through hard beginnings, and permission to think in smaller units—finishin...
What to do about Pretend “Guns” #69
In this episode, Jon addresses one of the most loaded questions parents ask quietly: what does it mean when my child wants to play guns, war, or “bad guys”? Grounded in the idea that most parents aren’t reacting to the play itself, but to the meaning they’re afraid it carries, he looks beneath the behavior to what high-arousal play is actually doing in a child’s brain. All of this plus "What to actually do...."Â
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The Neuroplasticity of Parenthood #68
This episode is a quiet, reflective departure from Jon’s usual teaching format—part science, part story, part meditation on what parenting does to the human brain. Beginning with the migration of the Arctic tern, Jon explores how love quite literally rewires us, asking what happens when the self itself begins to migrate in service of another.
Parents will walk away with a deeper understanding of neuroplasticity, caregiving, and identity—and a tender reassurance that feeling disoriented, changed, or unlike your former self isn’t a failure of parenting, but evidence that love is doing its work...
My favorite guest ever #67
Friday yap with the Mrs.
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Support the show
If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.
Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.
You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build bett...
Secrets, Promises, And Safe Homes #66
In this episode, Jon tackles one of the most anxiety-provoking parenting topics: kids and secrets—and why secrecy can feel so loaded for both children and parents. Centered on the idea that the most powerful word in a child’s world isn’t rule or consequence, but promise, he explains how secrecy hooks into loyalty, safety, and attachment long before kids have the brain development to navigate those tensions.
Parents will walk away with clarity on the difference between privacy, surprises, and secrets, insight into why “just tell me” often backfires, and a calmer, more protective...
The Labels That Teach Us Who We Are #64
This episode is a departure from Jon’s usual Q&A format—a reflective, narrative-style episode that zooms out to explore how words quietly shape who our kids believe they are. Beginning with the now-famous classroom experiment by Jane Elliott, Jon traces how labels don’t just describe behavior—they produce it, often long after the moment has passed.
Parents will walk away with a deeper awareness of how subtle cues, implied expectations, and everyday language shape a child’s nervous system, identity, and sense of possibility—and a gentler, more curious lens for noticing which versio...
How to Ditch Power Struggles #63
In this episode, Jon unpacks the moment every parent dreads—when a child looks at you and says, “You can’t make me.” Rather than framing it as defiance or disrespect, he explores what’s actually happening in a child’s nervous system when power struggles show up. Parents will walk away with a calmer lens, a clearer understanding of why control battles escalate, and practical ways to lead with confidence, reduce friction, and protect connection—without giving up boundaries.Â
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If parenting has felt hard lately…...
