Josie's Lonely Hearts Club

In the rubble of an abandoned radio station, the Twilight Sage finds an old cursed answering machine. What she discovers on it will forever change her. 

JOSIE'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB is a semi-scripted audio drama set in New Mexico’s 2nd-best relationship call-in show, created by Maximilian Clark and Rachel Music. Directed and sound designed by Maximilian Clark. Our story editor is Lauren Grace Thompson. Produced by Simone Kisiel and Alexandra Grunberg. Executive Produced by the Good Story Guild.

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Josie's is proud to recommend Rudyard Ruins Everything, an Anniversary Special from the team at Wooden Overcoats. While your favorite big-footed heroine lies comatose, audio fiction's favorite sitcom resurrects their brother-sister mortician team for a four-part miniseries you'll adore. Enjoy yourselves!

Keep an eye out for Season 7, which will be a little different than you're used to; a bit less scripted, but no less zany.

Love, Mama Rachel and Papa Maximilian.

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It’s come to this. The end. The end of the beginning. Which was before the first beginning. Before we go back to the end, now knowing how it all began, to begin…again…um…

KDNM keeps it real tonight, and Frank and Joanne make each other a promise. Truth takes many forms, including a bog witch, an anthropomorphic cheetah, a Sri Lankan smokeshow named Barbarella, and unspeakably suggestive catchphrases.

Speaking of catchphrases…

Our cuties this week include Caitlin Carleton, Geoff Grimwood, Daniel Millhouse...

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Now that Frank has met Joanne Holtzinger face-to-face, it threatens to come to fisticuffs. Everything is falling apart, including the ceiling holding that pregnant raccoon. While this week’s episode flounders, Frank is carping, and Joanne is fishing for solutions. She has to find her groove before Jo’s post-row low-flow mojo might mean no mo’ show. Uh-oh.

Mind your turn signal etiquette as Joanne uses her trusty(?) old note-cards to help a cat hoarder enjoying the silent treatment, a twin in a time-share-lationship, a woman struggling to rec...

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Still reeling from the events of the car wash, Frank has a chip on his shoulder with Joanne’s name on it. Too bad he can’t find her. Josie, meanwhile, extolls the virtues of keeping your partner guessing, while our listeners revel in what 7th-grade English calls “dramatic irony.” Meet a vertically-challenged barkeep, a lady known for her ejaculations, a couple confounded by costumes, and someone trying to keep their partner’s lust Loch’d in. 

Our cuties this week include Neill Fleming, Ashwini Ganpule, Hal Lublin, and A...

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It’s the annual KDNM car wash fundraise-a-ganza AND the annual Madrid Library Bake Sale…on the same day. Remember JP the Maitre D’ and all that Madame Doubtfire nonsense? Foreshadowing, fools! Jo is twice as nice at the station and the library in a two-faced display of Janusian proportions. Between the Lonely Hearts, library denizens, and Margie, expect enough hijinks to go back for seconds. You’ll meet a role play enthusiast, a wife whose marriage is having a Renaissance, a pastry pander, and someone who needs a “piece-a pi...

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Two’s company, three’s a crowd, four is a huge mess. Especially when two of those people are Joanne. As Frank’s new relationship creates a regular rhombus of complications for Joanne, Josie looks at group dynamics in all their many shapes. This week, she faces an overwhelmed maid of honor, a boyfriend feeling crowded out by his social butterfly, a husband dealing with his wife’s credit poaching, and a young girl conducting carnal acts that can only be described as “supersonic” (this is not nearly as sexy as it s...

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Josie Heller has never heard the words “Ho Era” back-to-back, but something in the air is making everyone want a little front-to-front. Meet a Woman in the middle of a marathon, a man who doesn’t want to slip into something a little more comfortable, a serial monogamist looking to break the cycle, and an Amish gal looking to make the most of her Rumspringa. Even Frank has a little lady (who might be the perfect distraction from his mission to expose Josie’s secret). 

Our cuties this week...

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Slip into something a little more comfortable…like your thinking caps. Tonight’s show is occupying the sensitive spots between our ears, and Josie puzzles out some of the southwest’s erotic enigmata. Meet a couple riddled with brain teasers, an imposter of Dostoevskian proportions, someone who only wants quantum mechanics under her hood, and Craig, who is new in town. Support your local library!

Our cuties this week include Raechel Wong, Danielle Cohn, Joel Rainwater, and Kristi Boulton. Special guest Becca Lustgarten as Charli.  

JOSIE'S...

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This week, we put the “Bravo” in “Bravecto” as the battle of wills between Josie and Frank takes a turn for the itchy. A ficus fern (and you) are the only living witnesses to the fabled Wormageddon 2022. The competition oozes onto the airwaves as callers share stories of one-upping and tiptoe into the deep end of the dirty pool. We encounter an accountant who’s just learned the skinny, a couple embroiled in a love-off, a man who can’t wedlock until he warlocks, and a motocross maven with thirteen sch...

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Realizing they are stuck with one another, Josie and Frank change the rules of engagement; now volume isn’t the only dynamic shifting between them. Too bad every plan has a few kinks in it. Power exchange becomes our theme - you like your subs topped with cheese? You perverts. Meet a voyeur with the wrong square footage, recumbent royalty, somebody with in-SIR-mountable issues, and a bookworm with a very inconvenient reading list.

Our cuties this week include Tris Miller, Brendan Sokler, Jen de Haan, and Gen Mo...

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Realizing they are stuck with one another, Josie and Frank change the rules of engagement; now volume isn’t the only dynamic shifting between them. Too bad every plan has a few kinks in it. Power exchange becomes our theme - you like your subs topped with cheese? You perverts. Meet a voyeur with the wrong square footage, recumbent royalty, somebody with in-SIR-mountable issues, and a bookworm with a very inconvenient reading list.

Our cuties this week include Tris Miller, Brendan Sokler, Jen de Haan, and Gen Mo...

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Keep your peepers peeled, because there are traitors about! Turncoats of all shapes are coming out of the woodwork, and the callers are on high alert. Josie and Frank have the same idea, but different solutions. Nothing Greg Pebbles can’t fix, though, no sir-ee. 

Meet a bagel maven who can’t stomach the competition, a TikTok trend that’s all in the family, a gal who is neither the brains nor the Braun, and somebody who doesn’t own a cat.

Our cuties this week...

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This week, we tear up the notecards and light all thirty-some scented candles at once: It's Valentine's Day at KDNM! For those who observe, it's also the anniversary of Captain Cook's death at the hands of native Hawaiians.  It's NOT President's Day. You hear that, Frank? Not. President's. Day.

Josie and Frank's workplace romance may be doomed before it even gets off the ground, but the callers are still getting the best Tender Loving Cupidity Jo can offer. Meet a singing telegrammer, a very tall baby, and t...

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What the flux capacitor? It's 2022, and we have transported back in time to Josie's first year at KDNM. The station is desperate for some new blood, and the feral horde of raccoons is ready to draw it. Fresh on the scene is our intrepid heroine...with absolutely no idea what she's doing. Surely Frank will be helpful, compassionate, and freshly showered.

Relive the worst meet-cute in radio history! Marvel at the sheer volume of notecards! Swoon as Greg Pebbles opens a Mexican Coca-Cola!

Our cuties...

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It's 2022, and KDNM is looking for a late-night host for their midnight timeslot. But in the meantime, Greggy P is here to fill that slot with his rock. Watch out: this episode is for Adults Only.

This episode features the talents of Jack Dorsey, Geoff Grimwood, Caitlin Carleton, Neill Fleming, and a live raccoon.

Sorry that April Fools' Day had to land on a Wednesday, but here we are. 

JOSIE'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB is a semi-scripted audio drama set in New Mexico’s 2nd...

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As it turns out, having a grand piano fall on your head is not good for you. Fortunately, Josie is receiving the best medical care Denver has to offer. Sit by Joanne's bedside as her loved ones and complete strangers tend to our sleeping beauty.

Let's jump right into the traction.... Season six has begun!

This episode features Sarah Allyn, Jen deHaan, Anthony Misiano, Tris Miller, Hal Lublin, Hannah Schooner, Danny Gavigan, Douglas Jung, and Sophie Bushwick.

JOSIE'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB is a...

Last year's Hollywood drama, In Media Res, featured an ambitious scope and dynamite performances that landed the cast an Ambie nomination for Best Performance in Audio Fiction. But before they were famous, most of the cast called into the Lonely Hearts Club. These are our favorite Josie's moments with the Ambie nominated cast of In Media Res.

Season Six returns in two weeks, so now's the perfect time to head over to your podcatcher of choice to binge the whole feature-length series (with six original songs), currently AD-FREE from now until the Oscars.

Thank you...

Just for today, we are pivoting to infotainment! Pull up a chair and let the long-awaited answers wash over you as Maximilian and Rachel (moderated by our very own Jack Dorsey IV AKA Greg Pebbles) finally answer all the burning questions listeners have submitted. Questions like: what's a male cougar? Why are you all so dang cute? Is that really how you pronounce Madrid? Expect pointless segues, the circuitous history behind the making of Josie's Lonely Hearts Club, and a halfway decent Bobcat Goldthwait impression.

Want to join the conversation, join us on discord: https://discord.gg...

The last thing Josie recorded before she moved in with Alex. While you wait for next season, KBXV is proud to introduce Sorry About the Murder. With two seasons ready to binge, you can listen right here or anywhere else you find your podcasts.

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Season Finale. After the shocking events of the past few months, the whole gang is ready to get back to normal. What better time to reset than the New Year? Joanne and Alex are eager to begin their lives together, and Frank has a new studio to manage. KBXV has its new leading lady, and she's inviting her listeners to share their resolutions. We meet some new and improving cuties, including a burgeoning fiction writer, the Kings of Quibble, and a muffin-maker who's been buttering up her coworkers.
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Strap in, cuties; this episode launches our twisty-turny, topsy-turvy season into the stratosphere. At last, the subterfuge, violence, double-crosses, and scrotal injuries converge to their final shocking conclusion! As Joanne fights tooth, nail, and urethra for her freedom, friends and enemies alike gather in a tastefully-decorated penthouse, with one question on their lips...Who killed Avery Vestibule? Expect white-knuckle action, seduction, and scandalous truths revealed as our heroine and her trusty reptilian companion (that's Horatio, not Frank) embark on the adventure of a lifetime.

Cuties this week...

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*Warning: This episode contains Bobbi Bobby*

On the second table from the back, across from the broken vending machine, our tenacious heroine leaves no stone unturned as she attempts to prove her innocence. As the obstacles pile before her like so much History Meat, an unlikely ally strikes a peculiar bargain.

Cuties this week include Geoff Moonen, Geoff Grimwood, Carla Lerner Montero, Sarah Allyn, Jessie Cannizarro,  Ashley Adler, Abigail Turner, Amanda Sykes, Lauren Shippen Ross Bryant, and Maximilian Clark. Special Guest Peter Wicks as the R...

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Being in prison can't keep Joanne off the air. Josie's Captive Hearts Club is as close to her real show as Brailey Smindlesoon can make it. Whatever that's worth. Warning: This episode has a lot of raunchy smut in it, but it also has a pretty good Sam Elliot impression so it's up to you whether you listen to this one with your parents or not. 

Cuties in this Very Special Episode include: Carla Lerner Montero, Danny Gavigan, Hal Lublin, Lauren Shippen, Madelyn Murphy, M...

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"A monumental achievement!" - Lady in Rachel's pilates class
"SUPERB!" - Maximilian's dog, Zana

Few audiodramas capture the triumph of the human spirit as memorably as The Skankshaw Redemption. Carla Lerner Montero and Rachel Music star in this remarkable episode based on the film based on the same Stephen King story collection that gave rise to Stand By Me.

Montero, who received a lot of forehead kisses and gratitude for this performance, plays Hayley Brenda "Brailey" Penelope Compote, a fraudster who knows what it ta...

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Grab the Dramamine and prepare to do a double-take as the Lonely Hearts Club is turned on its head. With Joanne behind bars, it's up to Frank to rescue tonight's episode and see our cuties through a topsy-turvy show that will test everything he's got. Can our favorite producer make the switch, or will he drown in dead air? On the way we meet a dad trading kickbacks for snack-packs, a wife who's trying to keep it in the family, a roadside damsel, and a butler eager to be...

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It's mid-season tidings, cuties and we know you're as interested in the inner workings of the criminal justice system as any fan of light rom-com audio fiction, so we're giving you a peek at the voicemail of Public Defender for Santa Fe, who recently picked up a new client. 


Our cuties this week include Geoff Grimwood, Carla Lerner Montero, Jessie Cannizzaro, Hal Lublin, Frank Romeo, Dana DeRuyk, Ashley Adler and Chris Gebauer.

JLHC was created by Maximilian Clark and Rachel Music. It's produced by S...

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We don't want to rattle your cage, cuties,  but this episode puts us behind bars. Without the Bobby billions to bail him out, the thin blue line is making a big fat example out of our beloved Frank. Just wait until Bobbi hears about this...Faced with his incarceration, Joanne and Ruby make a tenuous alliance to clear his name. Mia, fresh off her disastrous crash, is taking the case as personally as ever and steaming up the evidence locker. We have good cops, bad cops, worse lawyers, and n...

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Lights! Camera! Anguish!

It's Josie Heller's national debut, and while KBXV is rolling out the red carpet, Joanne is trying to keep her secrets under the rug. Today, she meets the press and feels the squeeze. The PR machine is grinding to life, and our lovable duo need to be firing on all cylinders or be crushed beneath its gears. With so much at stake, the questions are mounting: where is Mia? Who is behind those coats? What is in Frank's cooler?

Our cuties this...

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Pack a picnic basket of caviar and dino nuggies, today we're on a field trip out of the studio! While Josie appeals to our kinder nature, Ruby finally listens to the show. She's covering her bases (and Frank's butt), until a Reagan-sized opportunity appears. The closer Mia gets to the truth, the more danger the whole gang finds themselves in.  On-air, we have a marriage of corporate convenience, a helicopter mom who probably actually uses a helicopter, a girl looking for a real lifesaver, and the belle of the B...

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Mind your P's and Cuties, because today KDNM is under the magnifying glass.  There's a private investigator sniffing around the studio, up close and very, very personal. Joanne and Frank are sweating under the scrutiny, and not just because of their big secret. On air, meet a culinary cutthroat, someone dealing with a monster in the closet, an unsupported entrepreneur, and a serial pet-owner with a lot of explaining to do.

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Jo...

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Oh behave, cuties! Joanne is coming to the nation live from KBXV headquarters and has to be on her best behavior. With a change of scenery, Jo is performing for a whole new crowd, with a whole new set of rules. Can she keep her cool around weapons-grade hottie Dr. Mark? Or will her conscience spill out like so many heaving breasts unlaced in a moment of passion? Meet an Oklahoman speaking in code, a workplace flirtation gone flat, a teaching tool with unintended consequences, and a filthy little...

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Throw open the windows and air the place out -- after all that nonsense last week, it's time to get spruced up for that national slot. Nothing to worry about here, and anyone who says otherwise needs their mouth washed out. In fact, let's give the whole show a thorough scrubbing. In this sparkling episode, you'll meet a grandson with a housing problem, a snoop who likes it raw, a janitorial two-timer, and a very raunchy germaphobe.

This week's cuties included Ross Bryant, Caitlin Carleton, R...

Throw open the windows and air the place out -- after all that nonsense last week, it's time to get spruced up for that national slot. Nothing to worry about here, and anyone who says otherwise needs their mouth washed out. In fact, let's give the whole show a thorough scrubbing. In this sparkling episode, you'll meet a grandson with a housing problem, a snoop who likes it raw, a janitorial two-timer, and  a very raunchy germaphobe.

Josie's Lonely Hearts Club was created by Maximilian Clark and Rachel Music. The show is produced by A...

Season Five is here, and with it …comes scandal. Not for Josie, no way, but for a national show at KBXV. The time is ripe for a regime change…can the Lonely Hearts nab that precious drivetime slot? If Frank and Joanne want to impress those execs, they’ll need more than a foolproof plan. They’ll need a scheme-proof plan. Look alive, cuties, there are nefarious forces at work. Our favorite dynamic duo will need to outwit new foes while they catch up with old friends. We welcome back callers to ask, “Where Are They Now?” “How Have You Been?” and...

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Season Five is here, and with it …comes scandal. Not for Josie, no way, but for a national show at KBXV. The time is ripe for a regime change…can the Lonely Hearts nab that precious drivetime slot? If Frank and Joanne want to impress those execs, they’ll need more than a foolproof plan. They’ll need a scheme-proof plan. Look alive, cuties, there are nefarious forces at work. Our favorite dynamic duo will need to outwit new foes while they catch up with old friends. We welcome back cal...

Hello our little French fries, we wouldn't be salty if you needed a little catch-up before you listen to the new season. Et voilà, here it is! Joanne and Frank take you through the big beats that brought our lonely hearts to this point in the show.

#Spoilers for the first four seasons

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello, our little French fries!  We wouldn't be salty if you needed a little catch-up before you listen to the new season. Et voilà, here it is! Joanne and Frank take you through the big beats that brought our lonely hearts to this point in the show. (Listen at your own peril, as this trailer episode contains spoilers for the first four seasons!)

JOSIE'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB is a semi-scripted audio drama set in New Mexico’s 2nd-best relationship call-in show created by Maximilian Clark and Rachel Music. Our story editor is Lauren Grace Thompson. Produ...

Knock knock.
Who's there?

Season 5, that's who!! Josie’s Lonely Hearts Club is back... but first, let's check in on the station. Hey...they got one of those fancy recording doorbells. Looks like your go-to hotline has finally entered the 21st century, and all our loyal cuties on Patreon get to enjoy it ONE WHOLE WEEK before it’s available to the public!

This new season is our most surprising yet, complete with plenty of surprises, twists and turns, danger and romance. Buckle up, you desert stars, you're in for quite the ride

Knock knock.Who's there? Season 5, that's who!! Josie’s Lonely Hearts Club is back... but first, let's check in on the station. Hey...they got one of those fancy recording doorbells. Looks like your go-to hotline has finally entered the 21st century, and all our loyal cuties on Patreon get to enjoy it ONE WHOLE WEEK before it’s available to the public! This new season is our most surprising yet, complete with plenty of surprises, twists and turns, danger and romance. Buckle up, you desert stars, you're in for quite the ride. We’re so thrilled to be back at...