Tales From The Lane

What if the person you're becoming is someone you've been all along?

We tend to think about career reinvention as leaving one identity behind and stepping into another. But what if every experience, every skill, and every version of ourselves is contributing to the person we're becoming?

This week on Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by my longtime friend, author Katie DeBonville, whose fascinating career has taken her from professional music studies to more than three decades in nonprofit fundraising, and most recently, to publishing her first book, Grace Notes: A Musical Memoir.

What if your productivity is actually keeping you stuck?

You're busy all day. You're checking things off your to-do list, completing projects, organizing your life, and getting things done.

But when you look at the goals that matter most to you, you're barely making progress.

Sound familiar?

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm exploring a particularly sneaky form of procrastination: using productive, worthwhile tasks to avoid the work that feels uncertain, uncomfortable, or challenging.

The conversation was inspired by a coaching client who was making tremendous...

What do you do when you know you want something more, but you have absolutely no idea how to get there?

For successful professionals, one of the hardest parts of starting something new is suddenly finding ourselves in unfamiliar territory. We're used to being competent, prepared, and knowing what comes next. But when you're changing careers, building a business, writing a book, or pursuing a long-held ambition, there may not be a clear roadmap to follow.

And that's okay.

In Episode 135 of Tales from The Lane, we're exploring how to make meaningful progress...

Are you so busy maintaining your current life that you have no time to build the next one?

There's a big difference between being busy and building. And for successful professionals, freelancers, and entrepreneurs, confusing the two can keep us stuck for years.

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm sharing a conversation with a freelancer whose calendar was packed with low-paying, unfulfilling work. He had an exciting idea for a new offer that could significantly increase his income and give him more freedom, but he couldn't find the time to develop it.<...

The Creators Leadership Mastermind, my 9-month guided mastermind group for people ready to finally move a meaningful goal from idea to reality, is open for enrollment through October 11th. If you're ready to find out what completing your big thing could set in motion, book a call with me today to get the conversation started. 

We spend an enormous amount of time talking about how to reach our big goals.

But what actually happens after you do?

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm looking at what it really feels like w...

***The Creators Leadership Mastermind, my 9-month guided mastermind group for people ready to finally see their biggest goals come to life, is open for enrollment through October 11th. Book a call today to get the conversation started***

There are exactly 100 days left in 2026.

And when I realized that while planning this week's episode, I couldn't resist turning it into a planning exercise.

But this isn't a "100-day challenge," and I'm definitely not interested in squeezing every possible drop of productivity out of the rest of the year.

Instead, I'm asking a...

What happens when something you really, really wanted doesn't work out?

You don't get tenure. The business fails. The career you spent decades building no longer fits. A relationship ends. Or maybe you simply realize that the version of success you've been working toward isn't something you want anymore.

For high achievers, failure can become tangled up with identity surprisingly quickly. We know how to work harder. We know how to persevere. But what happens when trying harder isn't actually the answer?

This week on Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by Steve...

You want to write the book. Build the business. Prepare the audition. Launch the festival. Make the career pivot.

There's just one problem: your current life is already full.

A lot of deep-work advice assumes that you have three or four beautiful, uninterrupted hours available to disappear into your studio, office, or writing room. But what happens when you're trying to build something new while still working your current job, raising children, caring for parents, leading a team, maintaining relationships, and generally keeping your existing life running?

In Episode 130 of Tales from The...

Remember the thrill of a brand-new Trapper Keeper, freshly sharpened pencils, new clothes, new classes, and walking into school knowing you were officially one grade older?

Why did we stop getting that feeling just because we grew up?

In Episode 129 of Tales from The Lane, Kate takes a playful look at the internet's obsession with "September resets" and asks what back-to-school season could look like for those of us whose lives require slightly more maintenance than washing the duvet cover, restocking the fridge, and taking a hot-girl walk.

Because while a Saturday reset...

What if you could predict where you'll be six months from now simply by looking at your calendar today?

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate walks through four common ways we manage our calendars, from allowing everyone else to determine how we spend our days to creating wildly ambitious schedules that leave no room for being human. Then she shares a practical framework for building a calendar around the results you actually want:

WHO: Who needs your time and attention?

WHY: Why do you want what you say you want?

Are you supposed to be hustling right now...or resting? Should you be launching something, learning something, or stepping away for a while?

Spend enough time watching other successful people online, and you'll find completely contradictory advice.

One person is pulling all-nighters during a massive launch. Someone else is spending the summer at the lake house while their business runs without them. Another successful creator disappears for months, only to emerge with a new book, project, or idea.

So...which one are we supposed to be doing?

In this episode of...

This week on Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by speaker, facilitator, and transformational leadership guide Mary Cay Durrant, whose work has touched thousands of senior leaders at more than 100 organizations, including Deloitte, Pepsi, KPMG, Children's Hospital Los Angeles, and Seattle Children's Hospital.

Mary Cay spent years succeeding inside the corporate world while privately realizing that something was missing: joy, wonder, and a sense of being fully alive.

An unexpected experience with horses changed the way she thought about leadership, work, and transformation and eventually led her to develop her Vibrant W.O.R.K...

What if waiting one more year to pursue the thing you really want isn't as harmless as it seems?

Most people don't consciously give up on their dreams. They postpone them. Work is busy. The timing isn't ideal. The kids need them. The economy feels uncertain. Maybe next year will be better.

But one year has a funny way of becoming five.

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate explores the hidden costs of postponing the projects, career moves, businesses, books, creative ideas, and life changes that keep calling to us.<...

Ep. 124: The Projects That Change Your Life Rarely Have Deadlines

Why is it so easy to finish work for someone else... but so hard to make progress on the projects that matter most to us?

In this episode, I share a story from my years as a freelance musician in Boston. On paper, everything was going well. I had a thriving career, incredible opportunities, and a full calendar. But tucked away in a notebook were dozens of ambitious ideas that never became reality.

Then, in March of 2020, one idea finally did.

...

Have you ever looked around at your life and thought...

"Everything is fine... so why do I feel so stuck?"

This week, we're exploring one of the most common challenges I hear from high-achieving professionals. They have successful careers, strong reputations, and lives that look great from the outside, but inside, they can't shake the feeling that they've been standing still.

In this episode, we explore why smart, capable people often stay stuck for years, even when they know they're meant for something more.

You'll learn:

Most people think planning season happens in January.

I disagree.

July might be the most powerful planning month of the entire year.

By now, we have six months of evidence. We know what's working, what's draining us, and which goals still matter. Instead of waiting for another New Year, this is the perfect time to pause, reflect, and intentionally design the next 90 days.

In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on my own Q3 plans and sharing exactly how I approach quarterly planning.

You'll hear:

I just returned from my first-ever Craft + Commerce conference in Boise, Idaho—and I came home with far more than a notebook full of quotes.

In this episode, I share the biggest lessons I learned from spending eight days, twelve flights, and countless conversations with creators, entrepreneurs, speakers, authors, and friends whose work has shaped my own.

We'll talk about:

What does it actually take to create an event that people remember for years?

Whether you're dreaming of hosting a conference, retreat, concert series, fundraiser, festival, or community gathering, there's a lot more happening behind the scenes than most people realize. Successful events require vision, strategy, leadership, budgeting, marketing, logistics, and perhaps most importantly, a deep understanding of the people you're bringing together.

In this episode, I sit down with Ginger Taylor, founder of Ginger Taylor Collective and a Fractional Head of Events with more than 15 years of experience across hospitality, conferences, and live experiences...

Two episodes ago, we talked about choosing your One Big Thing, Two Small Habit Tweaks, and giving yourself Three Months to make meaningful progress.

Last week, we talked about how to stay focused when motivation fades.

And this week, we're talking about something that matters even more than the goal itself:

The Who.

Because despite what the self-help industry often tells us, meaningful growth rarely happens in isolation.

Behind every major accomplishment, career change, creative project, business launch, fitness goal, and personal reinvention, you'll usually find a network of...

Last week, I introduced my 1-2-3 Summer Framework:

One Big Thing.
Two Small Habit Tweaks.
Three Months to see what happens.

This week, we're tackling the question that determines whether any of it actually happens:

How do you follow through?

Because most people don't struggle with setting goals.

They struggle with June 14th.

The day the excitement wears off.

The day life gets busy.

The day the plan collides with reality.

In this episode, I share practical strategies...

Memorial Day marks the unofficial beginning of summer, and while many of us still think of summer as a season of possibility, adulthood has a way of turning it into little more than a blur of logistics, obligations, and unanswered emails.

In this episode, I share a simple framework for creating a summer that feels expansive, intentional, and deeply satisfying.

Rather than chasing another massive reinvention project, I invite you to focus on:

✔️ One Big Thing that would make your life feel larger, richer, or more meaningful

✔️ Two Small Habit Tweaks that sup...

Why does one difficult email feel like it will consume your entire day… only to take six minutes once you finally send it?

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, we explore the difference between physical time and emotional time, and why so many high performers feel overwhelmed by tasks that objectively do not take very long.

Drawing from psychology, neuroscience, and her own life, Kate explains how emotional intensity distorts our perception of time, why avoidance makes tasks feel bigger and heavier, and how stress convinces us that we "don't have time" for th...

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate is joined by sales and strategy coach Steph Crowder for a conversation about entrepreneurship, selling, courage, and building a business that actually supports the life you want to live.

Steph is the host of the Courage and Clarity podcast, a former Director of Sales Training at Groupon, and the founder of Sold Out Group Programs, where she helps entrepreneurs start, sell out, and scale group programs with more courage, clarity, and confidence.

In this conversation, Kate and Steph talk about Steph's path from corporate sales to...

There's a conversation happening everywhere right now:

"You're already enough." "You don't need to improve." "You don't need to be better."

And while all of that is true… it's also incomplete.

Because most high-achieving, thoughtful people don't actually want to stay exactly where they are. They want to grow, expand, and explore what they're capable of.

So what does that mean?

If you're already enough, why grow? And if you want to grow, does that mean you think you're not enough?

In this episode of Tales from Th...

Ready to think about your next season? Kate's 90-Day Strategy Sessions are now open. These one-off 1:1 sessions help you get clear on what matters most, organize the work in front of you, and build a realistic plan for the next 90 days. You can Book your session here or DM the word "Strategy" to @KKayaian on Instagram for details. 

Most people think public speaking is about being impressive.

But the best speakers make the audience feel like they are being brought into something.

In this week's episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by...

What do you do when your to-do list is full of important things, but none of them are urgent?

That is one of the most disorienting places to be.

There is no immediate deadline forcing your hand, no outside pressure telling you what to do first, and no obvious starting point. So even smart, capable, motivated people can end up stalled, spinning, or avoiding the work altogether.

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate shares three practical ways to move through important, non-urgent work without wasting energy overthinking every next step.<...

What if the problem isn't that you need a better morning routine… but that you've been trying to follow someone else's?

In Episode 111 of Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by Amy Landino — high-performance coach, bestselling author, creator of AmyTV, and one of the most trusted voices on intentional productivity — for a conversation about morning routines, self-leadership, and what it really means to build a life that fits the season you're in.

Amy shares the story of her path from working in a law firm to building a business online, growing a massive YouTube platform, and he...

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate breaks down why Q2 is the most powerful and underutilized part of the year, and how to turn the next 90 days into real traction instead of more busy work.

She introduces the idea of Q2 as the Quarter of Traction, where you stop performing your goals and start following through on them in a way that actually fits your life.

In this episode, you will learn:

What happens when a high-achieving life is optimized for performance—but quietly hostile to connection?

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by Dr. Kimberly Horn—research psychologist, professor, health behavior scientist, and author of Friends Matter, for Life: Harnessing the 8 Tenets of Dynamic Friendship—for a powerful conversation about adult friendship, loneliness, and what meaningful connection really looks like when you're ambitious, capable, and carrying a lot.

We talk about why success can narrow your circle, why so many leaders mistake loneliness for burnout, and how high performers often become the "strong...

Most high achievers don't struggle because they lack ambition, ideas, or discipline.

They struggle because their lives are full of tiny points of friction.

Small decisions. Small interruptions. Small logistical annoyances that quietly drain attention, energy, and momentum throughout the day.

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate explores the concept of friction — and how seemingly minor obstacles can prevent us from doing the work that actually matters.

Through real-life examples and practical systems, she explains how removing small points of resistance can dramatically improve focus, follow-through, and clarity.

If you feel like everyone around you is racing ahead – launching faster, reading more, doing more, moving more quickly – this episode is for you.

In this solo episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate explores a principle she first learned as a musician and now sees everywhere in life and work:

Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast.

From music practice to reading, decorating a home, making decisions, deepening relationships, learning new skills, and building a business – Kate makes the case for moving more deliberately at the beginning so you can build something that a...

You did everything you were supposed to do.

You worked hard.
You built the career.
You earned the reputation.
You became successful by every conventional metric.

And now… something feels off.

In this solo episode, Kate explores one of the most disorienting experiences of mid-career success: realizing that you may have outgrown something that is still working.

You're still good at it.
People still respect you.
You're still being rewarded for doing it.

But the energy that once came from challenge, growth, and purpose ha...

What if the next level of your career isn't about doing more… but about designing better?

In this episode, I'm joined by Laura Sinclair—performer, educator, and coach (and a returning guest from Season 1, Episode 9)—for a conversation that goes way beyond music teaching. Laura has also been a 1:1 coaching client of mine for five years, and watching her build a values-driven, sustainable studio (while performing at a high level) has been nothing short of inspiring.

Yes, Laura's "Stress-Free Studio" work is centered on helping musicians build sustainable studios—but the real topic here is somethin...

What happens to our friendships when our lives start to expand?

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm joined by Dear Nina: Conversations about Friendship host Nina Badzin, whose podcast is ranked in the top 1% globally—and whose work sits right at the intersection of honesty, emotional maturity, and real-life friendship dynamics.

Together, we explore what happens to friendships during major life transitions: career growth, changing family structures, shifting priorities, and the inevitable reality that we can't take everyone with us into every season.

We talk about:

We tend to think of courage as something dramatic—big leaps, bold declarations, or burning it all down and starting over. But most of the courage that actually changes your life is much quieter than that.

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate explores the non-obvious ways we flex our courage muscle—the small, often invisible decisions that compound over time and quietly reshape our careers, identities, and lives.

You'll hear about:

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, Kate explores a question she's been asked repeatedly—especially in uncertain, chaotic times:

Is it selfish to focus on your own growth when the world feels like it's on fire?

Drawing on psychology, leadership, and her lived experience as both a conductor and a coach, Kate reframes self-actualization not as ego or individualism, but as responsibility. When individuals commit to becoming their best selves, they create stronger, more generous, and more resilient communities.

In this episode, you'll hear:

Why self-actualization was never meant to...

In this solo episode, we talk about what is REALLY standing between you and your dreams, and how to remove the obstacles. 

If you've been circling around the same goal for months (or years), telling yourself you'll begin "when you're less busy, when you're ready, or when you feel more confident about it," this conversation will hit home.

Using the metaphor of a solid block of marble, Kate shares eight common beliefs that disguise the real obstacles—fear, overthinking, avoidance, perfectionism, friction, clutter, and outdated identity patterns.

You'll learn:

Why your dre...

Book a 1:1 Strategy Session with Kate! limited spots available, click HERE to schedule yours. 

This episode marks a major milestone: 100 episodes of Tales from The Lane!

Instead of celebrating with highlights or a "greatest hits" reel, Kate uses this moment as a pause—a chance to reflect on the identity shifts of the past year and to look intentionally ahead to 2026.

Coming on the heels of ThriveFest, the Quarterly Retreat, and a deeply personal 2025 Year in Review, this episode explores how goals evolve when they're set from clarity instead of pressure—and why Kate...

Get your free copy of my Quarterly Retreat Guide– it's the perfect time to plan out your next 90 Days. 

In this episode of Tales from The Lane, I'm doing one of my favorite things of the year: a full, honest Year in Review.

This isn't a highlight reel or a greatest-hits episode. It's a thoughtful reflection on what 2025 actually held—what worked, what didn't, where I surprised myself, where I had to let go, and what only became clear with hindsight.

As I walk you through the year month by month, I share:

Day 4 of the Quarterly Retreat Mini-Series: OPTIMIZE

You've planned.
You've created.
You've organized.

Today, we optimize.

Day 4 is where we take everything you've built this week and make it smoother, lighter, more efficient, and far easier to sustain. This is where you move from "scrambling and reacting" to feeling supported by your tools, systems, and environment.

Inside this episode, you'll:

Refresh or update your website, LinkedIn, or public-facing profile so it matches who you are now

Optimize your templates so you stop reinventing the wheel<...