The Steadfast Podcast

Do you ever wonder if God is mad at you—or feel like you can never do enough to earn His approval?

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans and Annalise Lind, LPC, explore scrupulosity and what happens when faith becomes tangled with fear, guilt, and the pressure to get everything right. Through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS), they discuss how religious protector parts can develop, what those parts may be trying to protect, and how early relationships can shape the way we experience God.

Together, Jessie and Annalise explore:

“I’m fine.” “Whatever.” “Do what you want.”

Sometimes the shortest responses carry the most unspoken feelings. So why is it so hard to just say what we need?

Jessie Evans and Tiff Holdgate unpack the passive-aggressive patterns that show up in marriage, parenting, and everyday relationships. They explore how childhood experiences and attachment styles can shape the way we communicate, the difference between needing space and giving the silent treatment, and how to stop expecting others to read our minds.

With relatable examples and practical ways to ask for help, express frustration, and respond to...

Your child talks nonstop at home but goes quiet at school, church, or around family. How do you know when it’s more than shyness—and how can you help without adding pressure?

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jess Howell, LPC, and Jessie Evans explore selective mutism and the anxiety that can make speaking feel impossible. They discuss what parents might notice, when to seek professional support, and simple ways to make everyday interactions feel safer.

You’ll hear about:

• The difference between shyness and selective mutism

• Building connection without pu...

How do you find a therapist who’s actually right for you? Whether you’re starting therapy for the first time or wondering if it’s time for a change, knowing what to look for can make the process feel less overwhelming.

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans and Tiff Holdgate break down how to find the right therapy for your needs, personality, and season of life. They explore different therapeutic approaches, why connection with your therapist matters, and the questions you can ask before committing.

You’ll learn:

• How to identif...

What if making a mistake didn’t mean you failed?

In this episode, Jessie talks about why mistakes are part of growth, not proof that something is wrong with you. She shares how perfectionism can turn self-reflection into shame, why healthy relationships need repair instead of perfection, and what it looks like to get back up after something doesn’t go the way you hoped.

From taking risks in business to apologizing in relationships, Jessie explores how mistakes can teach us, stretch us, and make us better—if we’re willing to be honest, learn the less...

What if changing how you show up doesn’t mean you’re being fake—it means you’re being intentional?

In this episode, Jessie talks about the idea of the “self-edit” and why being authentic doesn’t mean acting on every feeling, impulse, or reaction. Sometimes the way we instinctively respond comes from insecurity, jealousy, defensiveness, or simply wanting to be liked or right.

Jessie explores the difference between changing yourself to fit in and making thoughtful changes because you know who you want to be. She also digs into the difference between being nice to yourself an...

What happens when fitting in starts costing you pieces of who you are?

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie talks about mean girl culture, belonging, confidence, and the pressure girls feel to change themselves in order to be accepted. She shares what she’s teaching her own daughters about opening the circle, celebrating other women, using their voices, and knowing they never have to audition for belonging.

Because real confidence isn’t about fitting in. It’s about knowing who you are and making room for others to do the same.

If you...

What does winning actually look like for you?

In the Season 4 premiere of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans explores a question she’s been thinking about all summer: how do we define winning when life is about so much more than measurable outcomes?

Jessie shares how the Steadfast team thinks about success, impact, and the kind of people they want to become. She also invites you to consider how you want to show up in your own relationships, family, work, community, and everyday life.

In this episode, Jessie talks about moving beyond the “scor...

In this final episode of Season 3 of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans, LPC and Annalise sit down with Adam Young to talk about why our stories matter.

Adam helps us understand that “story work” is not just about remembering the big timeline of our lives. It is about honoring the specific memories, wounds, joys, and moments that shaped how we experience ourselves, God, our relationships, and even our bodies today.

Together, they explore trauma, kindness toward younger parts of ourselves, faith integration, parenting, the wisdom of the body, and why healing does not happen in isol...

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans sits down with returning guest Megan Cannon, owner of Carolina Counseling for Athletes, for a powerful conversation about the emotional side of youth sports—and what athletes really need from the adults leading them.

Together, they explore how secure attachment, emotional safety, trust, and regulation impact not only performance, but a child’s long-term confidence and identity. From the role of coaches, to the influence of parents, to helping kids develop resilience without tying their worth to performance, this episode is packed with practical wisdom for families navigating spor...

Description:
In this more personal episode, Jessie shares what’s been stirring over the past few weeks and invites you behind the scenes at Steadfast.

From reflecting on what it means to stay present in the middle of everyday life, to sharing exciting updates—including a new resource app and a simpler way to use your out-of-network benefits—this episode is all about removing barriers and helping you take your next step toward growth and connection.

Jessie also highlights a few key themes from this season of the podcast, including learning to slow d...

What actually helps people grow, heal, and mature in church?

In this episode of the Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans sits down with Michel Hendricks, co-author of The Other Half of Church, to talk about why so many churches are strong on teaching but weak on relational transformation. Together, they explore the connection between discipleship, emotional safety, attachment, trauma healing, and spiritual maturity.

This conversation gets into what it means to become people who love like Jesus, why information alone is not enough to change us, and how healthy churches can become places of real connection...

What if “belonging” doesn’t mean fitting in… but finally getting to be fully yourself?

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans sits down with Charleston therapist and author Jen Jackson to talk about her book Softly Wired: Reflections of an Autistic Therapist and the journey of self-acceptance—especially for women who discover their autism later in life.

Together, Jessie and Jen explore:

Why therapy isn’t about “fixing yourself,” but recognizing and accepting yourself

How masking and camouflaging can lead to burnout (and what it feels like to unmask s...

What if self-care isn’t a bubble bath… but a front porch?

In this warm, laughter-filled episode, Jessie sits down with Southern storyteller and internet favorite Landon Bryant to talk about:

Southern culture vs. country identity

Emotional safety in families

Hospitality as self-care

Humor as connection

Authenticity and integrity

Letting chaos become comfort

And a HUGE live career announcement 👀

Mid-conversation, Landon casually shares that he’s been invited to make his debut at the Grand Ole Opry!!— and we get to cele...

Couples counseling is not just “learn better communication and move on.” In this episode, Jessie Evans and Steadfast counselor Tiff Holdgate unpack what’s really happening underneath conflict—attachment styles, nervous system reactivity, old hurts that stack over time, and the “cycle” that can start running your marriage.

You’ll hear practical ways to prepare for couples counseling, how to recognize bids for connection, and why individual healing often becomes part of relational repair (because your body can say “I’m in” while your nervous system still feels unsafe). We also talk through what doesn’t belong in couples work—like a...

When your child snaps, withdraws, rolls their eyes, or says “I don’t care,” it can feel like rejection—but often it’s communication. In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans (owner of Steadfast Christian Counseling) sits down with Emily Coomer, LPC to help parents slow down in the moment, understand what’s happening underneath the behavior, and respond in ways that build emotional safety and secure attachment.

We talk about:

Why “pushing away” can happen most in safe relationships

The “anger iceberg” and the feelings underneath (fear, shame, overwhelm, sadness)

How secure atta...

The “postpartum” season is bigger than we think — it’s the perinatal period, spanning pregnancy and often 1–2 years after birth. In this episode, Jessie Evans sits down with Steadfast counselor Annalise Lind to explore what happens internally when your “control panel” changes during pregnancy and early parenthood.

Through an Internal Family Systems (IFS) lens, we talk about how anxiety, intrusive thoughts, perinatal OCD patterns, and even depression can be understood as protective parts — not proof that you’re broken. You’ll hear a shame-free, faith-sensitive conversation about:

Why intrusive thoughts are so common (and why they feel so terrify...

One word is carrying way too much weight right now—and the confusion is hurting people.

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans responds to a recent Gospel Coalition article (“Why Women Are Going to Therapy Instead of Church”) and makes the case for a needed distinction: pastoral care/discipleship and clinical counseling are not the same thing. We’re not comparing apples to apples.

Jessie breaks down why scope of practice matters, why licensure exists (education, board oversight, ethics, continuing education, evidence-based care), and how well-meaning church “counseling” can unintentionally cause harm—especially whe...

Welcome back to The Steadfast Podcast — and welcome to 2026. In this episode, Jessie talks about the “reentry” feeling of the first few weeks of the year: getting back into routines, resetting the home and office, and setting goals with a gentle, grounded kind of intention.

Then she shares a moment with her daughter that stopped her in her tracks — a “glow up,” defined simply as being comfortable in your own skin. What would it feel like to be more fully yourself this year… and what part of you shows up to rein that in? Jessie explores this...

Unpack Your Stuff: The Gift of Secure Attachment

Episode Description (use everywhere):
On my 45th birthday week, I’m sharing why the #1 gift we can give our kids (and our marriages) is to keep unpacking our story. We talk IFS parts, attachment safety, repair over perfection, and why healthy couples work is often individual work in the context of relationship. I also highlight Adam Young’s Make Sense of Your Story and why “you can’t find yourself by yourself.”

If you’re ready to begin this work, we’d be honored to walk with y...

We all know gossip doesn’t feel good — but why do we still do it?

In this episode, Jessie unpacks Brené Brown’s concept of common enemy intimacy — that counterfeit sense of closeness we get when we “hotwire connection” by bonding over who or what we both dislike. It feels like connection, but it’s actually built on judgment, not truth.

From cancel culture to middle school mean-girl dynamics to adult friendships built on shared negativity, Jessie explores what gossip does to our relationships, and what it reveals inside us. Using insights from Internal Family Systems (IFS) t...

If you’ve ever caught yourself apologizing for feeling deeply or shrinking to make someone else more comfortable, this episode is for you.

In this deeply honest conversation, Jessie unpacks the “too much” part that many women carry — the part that believes that being authentic risks rejection or disconnection. Using Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, she explains how our inner world includes exiles (the tender parts that carry pain or fear) and protectors (the parts that keep us safe by controlling, explaining, or accommodating).

Through this practical and faith-rooted conversation, you’ll learn to:

Recogniz...

In this short but powerful episode, Jessie from Steadfast Christian Counseling in Charleston, SC, shares how to train both your mind and body to find calm on purpose. Drawing from cognitive behavioral therapy, somatic regulation, and faith-based grounding, she walks you through simple daily steps to move from chaos to clarity.

You’ll learn how to:

Interrupt anxious thought loops and restore focus

Use body-based tools (like breathing, posture, and movement) to settle your nervous system

Reframe fear-based thoughts through faith and truth

Experience peace as something you can pr...

Steadfast therapists (and Swifties) Jessie Evans, Emily Coomer, and Annalise Lind unpack Taylor Swift’s Life of a Showgirl through Internal Family Systems and attachment theory—zooming in on “Eldest Daughter,” “Father Figure,” “Opalite,” “Cancelled,” and more. Parts work, resilience, public vs. private selves, and why the harmonies might be her parts “singing together.” Come nerd out with us.

Book a consult: Book Online | Steadfast Christian Counseling
Follow on Instagram: @steadfastchristiancounseling
Subscribe: New episodes every Tuesday.

Steadfast Christian Counseling Counselors Jessie Evans and Tiff Holdgate sit down with therapist and author Dr. Andrew J. Bauman to talk about his book Safe Church and the hard, hopeful work of making churches safer for women and survivors. Andrew shares parts of his story, what his research with ~2,800 women working in churches reveals about sexism and abuse, where bad theology does real harm, and practical steps any community can take right now: start honest conversations, use trusted resources, increase diversity in leadership, implement clear policies, and require real accountability. If you’ve ever wondered how to love the Ch...

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans, counselor and owner of Steadfast Christian Counseling in Charleston, SC, takes a spontaneous detour from her planned topic on anxiety to share a raw, motivating reflection on freedom, agency, and the cages we often build for ourselves.

Jessie invites listeners to consider:

Are you walking in the freedom you already have?

How we can unconsciously live on autopilot in patterns shaped by shame, insecurity, or old wounds.

What it means to move from reactivity to agency, not only in relationships but also...

Chocolate milk, no coffee, and a very real chat about why we react the way we do. Jessie and Steadfast therapist Annalise Lind unpack Internal Family Systems (IFS): protectors, managers, firefighters, and the tender exiles they guard. We talk postpartum intrusive thoughts, inner critics, and why curiosity is often the gateway to compassion. With nods to Inside Out 2, EMDR’s bilateral movement, and the faith lens of a spirit‑led self, this episode gives you language and tools to move from reactivity to repair—so you can calm through big feelings, not just “calm down.”

You’ll learn

...

What happens when church teachings about sex and marriage are rooted more in obligation than intimacy? Author and researcher Sheila Wray Gregoire joins Jessie Evans and Tiff Holdgate to unpack damaging messages like “wives owe sex on demand” and “husbands make the final decision,” and shares what the data actually shows about healthy, faith-honoring marriages.

We talk about the real marriage killer (mental load, not disagreements about money or sex) and small steps couples can take today toward consent, security, and partnership.

📚 Resources & Links:
• Bare Marriage: baremarriage.com
• Books: The Great Sex Rescue, She Deserves Be...

This Week on The Steadfast Podcast: Attachment 101

What exactly is attachment—and why does it matter for your parenting, your marriage, and even the way you see God? In this week’s episode, Jessie breaks down Attachment 101 in simple, practical language for everyday moms and dads.

You’ll learn:

The four main attachment styles explained simply.

How to recognize your own patterns in stressful moments.

Parenting phrases and behaviors that encourage security (and ones to avoid).

Common objections parents have—like “What if my child is overreacting?” or “What if...

After-school hours can feel chaotic, but they’re also some of the best opportunities to build secure attachment with your kids. In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans, MEd, LPC and founder of Steadfast Christian Counseling in Charleston, SC, shares 3 ½ simple rhythms that parents can use to connect with their children, offer coregulation, and strengthen relationships at every age.

From the first five minutes after school, to snack time, to playful presence, to tiny but powerful micro-gestures of delight — these practices help kids feel safe, seen, and supported. Jessie also unpacks why attunement is like being...

What if emotions are not the enemy but a vital part of following Jesus? Jessie Evans is joined by researcher and writer Becky Castle Miller, along with Steadfast team members Tiff Holdgate and Annalise Lind, to explore the psychology and theology of emotions—how our brains construct them, how Jesus discipled his followers emotionally, and how the church can engage emotional health more faithfully.

This episode is produced by Steadfast Christian Counseling in Charleston, SC. Our team of licensed therapists helps people of all ages work through trauma, anxiety, depression, and relationship struggles with a Christ-centered, research-informed ap...

Welcome to Season 3 of The Steadfast Podcast — a Christian counseling podcast designed to meet you with clarity, compassion, and encouragement in the middle of everyday life. Presented by Steadfast Christian Counseling in Charleston, SC.

Whether you’re folding laundry, driving to work, or catching a quiet moment between parenting tasks, these 30-minute weekly episodes are here to give you space to reflect, learn, and grow.

Conversations about anxiety, trauma, marriage, parenting, and faith

Practical insights from licensed counselors to help you better understand yourself and your relationships

Honest discussions about spiritual woun...

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans, founder of Steadfast Christian Counseling, dives into a common but unspoken pressure many ministry leaders, therapists, and helpers face: the myth of omnicompetence — the belief that we should be able to meet every need, solve every problem, and never need help ourselves.You’ll learn:What the myth of omnicompetence is and why it shows up in faith spacesHow unprocessed trauma can fuel over-functioning in leadershipWhen to refer someone to a therapist — and why it’s a loving actWho’s who in the mental health world (LPCs, LMFTs, Psychologists, and more)How b...

In this episode, founder of Steadfast Christian Counseling shares the story behind the practice and the values that drive everything they do. You’ll hear about the personal roots of Steadfast, the need for trauma-informed care in the church, and what makes this counseling center in Charleston, SC so different. From growing up in a pastor’s home to working on church staff, this is a heartfelt look at how faith, ethics, and emotional safety come together to create something truly healing.
Stay tuned until the end to hear reflections from some of the Steadfast team abou...

The word deconstruction has stirred up a lot of fear and controversy in Christian spaces—but what if it’s not a threat to faith, but a part of it?

In this episode, Jessie and Tiff unpack the meaning of deconstruction and trace its roots—not just in modern culture, but in the pages of Scripture. From Jesus challenging legalism, to Job questioning suffering, to Peter unlearning religious boundaries, the Bible is full of faithful people who wrestled with what they were taught—and encountered God in the process.

Whether you're in the middle o...

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie Evans unpacks what Christian counseling really is—and what it’s not. If you’ve ever wondered whether therapy can align with your faith, or if it’s okay to ask for help, this conversation is for you. Learn how faith and clinical care can work together to bring healing, hope, and deeper connection to both God and yourself.

Whether you’re new to counseling or just exploring your options, this short episode offers clarity, encouragement, and a simple next step.

For more information and for a...

In this short but powerful episode, Jessie is joined by Tiff, Annalise, and Christie to offer support for parents navigating the aftermath of a traumatic event. Whether your family has experienced a loss, crisis, or unexpected disruption, this conversation provides gentle guidance, practical tools, and trauma-informed insight. Learn how trauma impacts both kids and adults, how to recognize common responses, and what steps you can take to create emotional safety and support healing in your home. If you’re feeling unsure of what to do next, this episode is here to remind you: you're not alone—and there is a wa...

In this episode of The Steadfast Podcast, Jessie is joined by Steadfast therapists Annalise Lind, Emily Coomer, and Tiff Holdgate to explore one of the most healing—and often overlooked—parts of building secure relationships: repair.

Rooted in attachment theory and rich with both clinical insight and personal stories, this conversation covers:

Whether you're raising...

This episode is a dual drop between Pastor Chips podcast and ours! Find more about Pastor Chip Judd here Podcast — Chip JuddFor more resources, blog posts, and information about counseling services, visit us at www.steadfastchristiancounseling.com. Whether you're looking for therapy, support for your church or school, or helpful tools for emotional and spiritual growth, Steadfast is here to walk with you.

Three Therapists diving into Imposter Syndrome while drinking coffee and failing at Facebook Live. What could be better!