the self-love archives
how to move on without closure [esp when they never apologize]
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there’s a conversation you’ve been rehearsing in your head. what you’d say, how they’d respond, how it would all finally make sense. but what if that conversation never happens? and what if waiting for it is the very thing keeping you stuck?
in this week’s episode of the self love archives, we’re talking about the art of moving on. we’ll get into what you’re really waiting for when you want an apology, why holding out for it hands someone else y...
the little things that changed my life (and how to gift them this holiday season)
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some of the biggest shifts in my life this year came from the smallest things: a time slot for my dishes, a romanticized money day, a solo trip to Montana, and yes, a tiny garbage can in the door of my car. in this episode, i’m sharing the habits, mindset shifts, and products that have changed my life over the past few months.
and since it’s the season of giving, i’m also sharing how to turn each one into a meaningful gift for someon...
how to let go of something you can’t stop thinking about | november's theme
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there’s a difference between remembering something and still holding onto it. if a moment from weeks, months, or even years ago still changes how you feel when it crosses your mind, it hasn’t been released yet. and that’s not your fault. most of us were never taught how to actually let something go.
welcome to November’s theme: release + let go. recorded riverside on my solo trip in montana, this episode covers how to tell what you’re actually still carrying, the three reasons...
are you mad at me? fawning, people pleasing + the survival response no one talks about | october self-love book club
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if you reread texts four times before sending them, apologize for things that aren’t yours, or let a one-word reply ruin your whole afternoon, this episode is for you. for our october self-love book club, we’re diving into Are You Mad at Me? by Meg Josephson and the survival response hiding underneath so much of our people pleasing: fawning.
i’m sharing where fawning still shows up in my life, why it’s so hard to let go of, and the small practice i want you t...
your life isn't too busy, it's too loud: how to stop comparing yourself + quiet the noise
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if you feel overwhelmed all the time, it might not be because your life is too busy- it might be because it's too loud. in this episode, we're separating busy from loud and going after the two things making the most noise in your head: comparison and overconsumption.
i'm getting honest about what the endless scroll is really doing to our brains, why we can't seem to sit in silence anymore, and the moment back in 2019 that taught me how powerful a little boredom can be...
your no is enough: how to stop over-explaining yourself
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most of us don't struggle to say no. we struggle to say no without the apology, the excuse, and the whole backstory attached. and every time we explain, we leave the door open for someone to talk us right out of it.
in this week's protect your peace episode, i'm sharing why your no comes with a paragraph, what a real no actually sounds like, and the exact one-sentence lines you can use this week. plus the scary movie story that taught me what saying yes...
how to protect your peace without cutting everyone off | october's theme
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"protecting your peace" has turned into code for delete, block, and walk away. but here's the thing: you could cut every difficult person out of your life and still have no peace.
in this episode, we kick off october's theme by getting honest about what protecting your peace actually means, and where it turns into avoidance.
we talk through three places your peace might be leaking right now, why someone's disappointment isn't proof you did something wrong, and the one assignment you need to d...
can you love someone and still be hurt by them? | i'm glad my mom died september self-love book club
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the title stops everyone in their tracks, and maybe that's because more of us relate to it than we'd ever say out loud. for september's self love book club read, we're closing out our month of healing your inner child with I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy, a memoir that names hard things exactly as they happened, without softening them or apologizing for them.
in this episode i'm sharing my biggest takeaway from the book, a personal story i've never really talked about publ...
giving yourself what you never received: how to choose, support & love yourself (inner child healing)
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some of us grew up waiting for a love that never came- the words we needed to hear, the safety we deserved, the people who never showed up. in this episode of our september inner child series, i'm sharing the missing piece from my own childhood and how i've learned to give it to myself.
we're talking about naming your gaps without blame, making room for the grief that comes with it, giving yourself closure when no one else will, and simple ways to become your...
how to heal your relationship with money | inner child + money mindset
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let's talk about the thing no one ever wants to talk about... money. but this isn't a budgeting episode: this is a heal-your-relationship-with-money episode. it's for the guilt you feel when you spend on yourself, the stomach drop before you open your bank account, and the belief that you have to burn out before you've earned it. because how you feel about money says a lot more about your inner child than it does about a dollar.
in this episode, i'm getting honest about my own...
your inner child is still protecting you- here's how to heal her | september's theme
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september is the new january-
this quarter has been building to this. july softened us with community, august opened us up by loosening our grip on control, + now we're going inward.
this month is all about healing your inner child: the version of you that formed before the world told you who to be, how to act, what to feel. she's still in there. she's still protecting you. and she shows up in ways you might not expect.
in this episode i'm gett...
you can be confident + still feel unworthy: self-worth vs confidence | august self-love book club
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what if the only thing standing between you and the life you dream of is that you don't believe you're worthy of it?
this month's self-love book club pick was Worthy by Jamie Kern Lima, and the part that stopped me in my tracks was the distinction she makes between worthiness and confidence- because they are not the same thing, and most of us are chasing one while starving for the other.
in this episode i'm getting honest about the fact that i'm curr...
september reset: your back to school fresh start at any age, in any season of life
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back to school energy isn't just for kids. whether you're heading to campus, sending your kids off, going back to school as an adult, or just craving a fresh start- september is your reset.
in this episode, i'm giving you the permission slip to stop performing, start over, and build your own fall curriculum. plus why september is the real midyear review, the magic of being a beginner again, and what i'm signing up for this fall.
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik t...
what to do when life isn't going according to plan: this is your reset
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so it's not going according to plan. the thing you thought would work out just isn't working out, and you're sitting somewhere in between the life you imagined and the one you're actually living.
this week we're talking about the reset- the real one. not the overhaul, not the five-year plan, not the version where you wake up at 5am a brand new woman: the reset that starts with letting yourself grieve the plan you lost, finding the redirect underneath it, and taking one single step...
you're not behind: how to let go of a timeline you never chose
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married by 25, house by 30, and have life figured out by now. who wrote that timeline?
..i can promise it wasn't you. somewhere along the way we were handed an imaginary schedule for when things were supposed to happen- and we've been quietly punishing ourselves ever since for falling behind in a race we never signed up for.
this episode is the foundation underneath our august theme of releasing control because most of the forcing we do is not about the goal, it's about the...
control is just fear in a prettier outfit- how to stop forcing + start flowing
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i used to think that if i planned hard enough- got every detail in line, controlled every single piece of it- i could make life go exactly the way i wanted.
spoiler alert: that's not how it works. and trying got me burnt out and exhausted.
welcome to august, bestie. this is our monthly theme episode, and this month we're releasing control. i'm your control freak type-a big sister who has learned not to be a control freak anymore, and i want you to l...
10 red flags of a toxic friendship and how to actually let go | july self-love book club
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what if the friend that's draining you isn't a bad person- they're just bad for you?
all july we've been talking about community, connection, softness, and making friends as an adult. this week we're flipping it over. how do you spot a toxic friendship, and what do you actually do about it?
we're pulling from one chapter of our self-love book club pick of the month, Finding Your People by Alexandra Hourigan and Sally McMullen of Two Broke Chicks- the red flags they name...
why adult friendships are so hard- and how to make new ones
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why does making friends as an adult feel so much harder than it used to be?
in this episode, i'm talking all about friendship- how proximity and consistency made it easier when we were younger, the reason/season/lifetime framework, how to tell when a friendship is draining vs. fulfilling, and practical ways to actually make new friends now.
consider this your sign: it's friendship summer. by the end of this episode, i want you to text that friend you've been meaning to text...
it's complicated: the truth about exes, situationships + why "too much" is a lie w philippa found
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this week i'm sitting down with Philippa Found, author of It's Complicated: Collected Confessions of Messy Modern Love - a collection of 250 anonymous stories pulled from over 1,500 submissions. we get into why so many of us secretly still think about an ex, the "too much" lie we've been sold, the shame that comes with being single, and whether AI belongs anywhere near our love lives.
a quick note before you watch- my video quality on this one was rough. my audio is a litt...
soft girl summer: community, connection + softness [finding your people]
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hello, hello, + welcome to soft girl self-love summer. 🤍 it's july, we're officially in quarter three, and this month's theme is community, connection, and softness.
this episode is your invitation to slow down and lean into the season- friendship, relaxation, doing things just because they're fun. we talk about why softness is not a weakness (and how you can be strong, independent and soft, connected, supported- it was never either/or), plus the real reason so many of us feel disconnected lately, and why it might not mean...
you are not too much [you were just taught to shrink] | june self-love book club
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have you ever been told you're too much? too loud, too sensitive, too emotional, too intense… too you? 🤍
i want you to sit with this for a second: were you ever actually too much- or did you just learn to tame yourself to be easier for everyone else to love?
this week on the self love archives podcast, we're closing out June and our theme of impressing your inner child with our book club read, Untamed by Glennon Doyle. we talk about the invisible...
why "happily ever after" is a lie [and real love is so much better]
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we all grew up watching the same movie- the prince, the kiss, the credits, the happily ever after. 🤍 but no one ever showed us part two. no one told us what real love actually looks like after the credits roll.
this week on the self love archives, i'm getting honest about the fairy tale lie: how growing up on disney and "happily ever after" quietly set us up to expect love to be perfect, effortless, and low-effort- and why that expectation keeps so many of us stuc...
your life won't change until you do: getting out of your comfort zone
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when was the last time you did something genuinely cool- not productive, not responsible, just cool? 🤍
this week on the self love archives, we're talking about getting out of your comfort zone and doing the things that make your inner child go, "wait, we get to do that?"
here's the truth i keep coming back to: staying in your comfort zone is what keeps you small. comfort feels safe, but comfort is also a ceiling and when you let comfort decide how hig...
would your younger self be proud of you? june's theme: impress your inner child
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welcome to june, friends. 🤍 this month on the self love archives, our theme is impressing your inner child- a tender, joyful episode all about admiration and magic.
we've spent the spring healing her and letting her play. now i want us to become the person she always looked up to- not by leaving her behind, but by moving forward hand in hand with her. in this episode, i'm walking you through three simple but powerful ways to impress your inner child: doing the things w...
why you're blocking your own creativity | may self-love book club
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connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
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the art of being dangerously beautiful: how to be confident, magnetic + fully yourself
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being dangerously beautiful isn’t about perfection- it’s about presence.
in this episode, we’re redefining beauty as something deeper: self-trust, softness, and the kind of confidence that doesn’t ask for permission. we talk about feminine energy, emotional safety, and the small shifts that make you magnetic without trying.
this is your reminder that the most unforgettable version of you is the one that feels the most like you.
check out the inspiration for this episode:
Jillz Guer...
the lil things that changed my life- whimsy wellness edition
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sooo excited to share this episode with you- all of the whimsy wellness that changed my life. because even if it's woo woo, why not try it? if it works- it might just change your life in little ways too.
let's track on stardust together: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/stardust-period-tracker/id1495829322
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives
sign up for the self...
the power of being whimsical: how small moments of joy can actually change your life
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this episode is for the moments when life feels heavy and you’re not really sure how to shift out of it.
we’re talking about whimsy- not as something childish or unrealistic, but as something deeply powerful. something that can actually change the way you feel, think, and move through the world. something that is even powerfully contagious to the people around you.
in this episode, i’m sharing the why behind whimsy- the psychology of it, the science of it, and how small...
be aggressively whimsical: stop fixing your life + start enjoying it
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you’ve done the healing- now it’s time to actually enjoy your life.
this episode is your permission to stop overthinking, embrace joy, and start living more freely, playfully, and unapologetically in the most aggressive way possible.
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives
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finding joy in everyday life with author kathleen ives | april self-love book club
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in this april book club episode of the self-love archives, we’re joined by author kathleen ives to talk about her book 7 ways to live in joy today.
we explore simple, realistic ways to bring more joy into your everyday life without overwhelm- from small mindset shifts to practical tools you can actually use. if you’ve been feeling stuck, disconnected, or unsure how to feel happier, this conversation offers a gentle, accessible path back to yourself.
grab kathleen's book here
connect...
health vs desirability: why women feel pressured to “fix” their bodies
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are your habits actually about your health or about being desirable?
in this episode, we’re unpacking the difference between caring for your body and performing it. from beauty standards to feminine hygiene, we’re questioning what we’ve been taught, where it comes from, and how to reconnect with what truly feels right for you.
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives
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how to glow up this spring [without becoming someone else]
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want to glow up this spring without falling into toxic routines?
in this episode, we’re redefining what a real glow up looks like- from editing your life like a mood board to building micro habits that actually stick. this is your guide to becoming your best self in a way that feels aligned, sustainable, and rooted in self-love.
want your own free download of the self-love 100? get it here: https://theselflovearchives.myflodesk.com/a1pl6fbhr8
connect with j...
you don't need to start over: a soft reset for april [clarity + healing]
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january felt hopeful, february was chaotic [let's be honest], march was letting go of perfection and now we’re here in the soft start to spring.
this isn’t about starting over [or completely redoing your vision board] it’s about giving yourself a soft reset. in this episode, we talk about clarity, healing, and updating your life based on what actually feels aligned right now.
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflov...
why you're still burnt out: the stress cycle no one talks about | march self-love book club
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burnout isn’t just about having too much to do- it’s about not completing the stress cycle.
in this episode, we’re talking about why burnout keeps coming back, the difference between stress and stressors, and why your body [not your to-do list] is the missing piece.
this is our march 2026 read for self-love book club. get your copy here
the era of overstimulation: why you can't hear yourself anymore
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we've normalized constant noise- but what is it actually taking away from us?
when everything is loud, it gets harder to hear yourself. this episode explores overstimulation, disconnection, + ways to come back to yourself and start listening
get the bose quiet comfort headphones
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives
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creating a home you love: how to make your home peaceful, cozy & restorative [part two]
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in part two of this conversation about creating a home you love, we move from clearing space to intentionally shaping the way your home feels.
this episode is about creating an environment that supports your energy, your routines, and your well-being- the kind of home that helps you slow down, recharge, and feel grounded at the end of the day. we talk about small shifts that can make a big difference, from creating cozy corners to designing spaces that reflect the version of yourself you’re gro...
the foundation of creating a home you love: decluttering, letting go & resetting your space [part one]
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in this episode, we’re talking about something that impacts our mood, our energy, and our daily lives more than we often realize: the spaces we live in. in part one of this conversation about creating a home you love, i’m starting with the foundation- the relationship we have with our homes and how our environment affects the way we feel.
we talk about why decluttering can feel emotional, how our homes slowly accumulate things we don’t actually need, and what it really means to r...
why women feel behind in life: the hidden history of women’s rights
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in this international women’s day episode, i’m talking about something that completely shifted my perspective about being a woman: the history we [women] inherited.
from the way women are barely mentioned in history books to how recent many basic rights actually are, it starts to explain why so many of us feel like we’re constantly pushing uphill.
this isn’t a history lesson- it’s a reminder that a lot of what we struggle with isn’t a personal failure. sometimes, it’s...
how imperfection helps you build confidence: trust yourself, take action, + let go of perfection
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perfection used to feel like protection- like if i just did everything right, i wouldn’t be judged, rejected, or disappointed.
but over time, i realized perfection wasn’t helping me feel safe… it was keeping me stuck.
in this episode, i’m talking about what it actually looks like to let go of perfection and lean into imperfection- in your work, your body, your routines, your healing, and your self-expression. this is about releasing the pressure to perform your life and learning how to trust you...
how to live deliciously as a woman | self-love, pleasure + personal growth | february self-love book club
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in this episode, we’re diving into florence given's book: women living deliciously and exploring what it really means to live fully, freely, and unapologetically as a woman. using the “excavate, plant, bloom” framework, we talk about unlearning limiting beliefs, choosing new standards, and embodying a life rooted in pleasure, power, and self-trust. if you’ve been craving permission to take up space, redefine womanhood on your own terms, and love yourself more- this conversation is for you.
🌸 want your own copy of women living deliciously? ge...
