Coming Up for Air

You've stopped speaking to them, so why are you still having entire conversations with them in your head?

In this episode, I talk about why we mentally talk to an ex after a breakup, replay conversations, imagine telling them things and wonder what they'd think of the life we're building without them.

We get into wanting recognition rather than reconciliation, missing being witnessed by someone who knew your whole life, and what these imaginary conversations might actually be doing for you.

If you're struggling to stop thinking about your ex and wondering whether...

If you’re single and scared you’ll never find love, I want you to imagine something: your future relationship is already secured.

You don’t know who they are. You don’t know when you’ll meet. You just know you cannot miss them.

How would you live differently if you weren’t constantly wondering when love was going to happen?

In this episode, I am talking about being single in your 30s, dating anxiety, the fear of being alone, finding love later in life and the experiences we sometimes postpone until we have a pa...

If you’re single and quietly wondering whether you’re doing this stage of life 'right,' this episode is for you.

There’s so much pressure to make single life look incredible the travelling, the career, the solo dates, the full social calendar, the constant proof that you’re thriving. But maybe your life doesn’t need to impress anyone. Maybe it just needs to feel like yours.

In this episode, we talk about feeling behind while other people get married and have children, the fear of being single forever, loneliness, changing friendships, creating your own m...

Being single in your 30s can feel completely fine… until suddenly it doesn't.

Your friends are married, having children and building lives with their partners. You're not on dating apps, you don't have many single friends and you find yourself wondering: where am I actually supposed to meet someone?

And underneath that is the question that's much harder to admit: what if I never do?

In this episode, I'm talking about the pressure of the timeline we thought our lives would follow, the fear of running out of time, comparison, being surrounded by co...

Why does being single feel so much harder than it should?

If you've ever found yourself wondering why everyone else seems to be moving on, why you're still waiting for your life to begin, or why being single feels like a personal failure, this episode is for you.

In this conversation, I am not talking about learning to 'love being single' or pretending you don't want a relationship.

I am talking about the hidden beliefs that make being single so painful in the first place.

Together, we'll explore why...

 There comes a moment after a breakup where you stop worrying about what happened. and start worrying about what it means for your future.

What if you'll never love again? What if you've missed your chance? What if your best years are already behind you?

In this episode I want to explore one question that completely changed the way I think about healing:

If you could see your future would you live today differently?

Because the truth is, we spend so much of our lives making decisions based on p...

 Why can't I move forward from my breakup? If you've been asking yourself this question, you're not alone.

In this episode I explore why so many of us become convinced we'll never move on after heartbreak. I talk about how your brain collects evidence that you're 'stuck,' why the story you tell yourself matters, and how changing small daily habits can completely change your healing.

This episode will help you understand why if nothing changes, nothing changes and why that's actually the most hopeful thing you'll hear today.

W...

If you've been left after a long-term relationship and you're wondering how to rebuild your life, this episode is for you.

Today, I'm talking about The Rebuild the chapter that comes after heartbreak. Not just healing or moving on, but creating a life that's bigger, braver and more fulfilling than the one you thought you'd lost.

I share the psychology behind why life can feel like it's standing still after a breakup, why your brain struggles to imagine a future without your ex, and how to stop surviving and start truly living again.<...

Have you ever wondered why being left hurts for years, even after you've done so much healing?

In this episode, I'm talking about the hidden rejection that follows a breakup. The part nobody prepares you for. The part where someone else's decision slowly becomes the way you see yourself. If you've ever thought, 'Why wasn't I enough?' or 'Why does rejection still affect me years later?' this episode is for you.

I'm sharing my own journey after my fiancé of 14 years left, why heartbreak can completely change your identity, and how I slowly s...

 How do you actually enjoy being single after a breakup instead of just surviving it?

In this episode, I'm challenging some of the most common breakup advice and sharing a completely different way of thinking about single life. Instead of treating being single like a waiting room, I explore why it can become one of the most freeing and transformative chapters of your life.

I talk about why we keep living as though our ex is still watching, how emotional intensity can make peace feel unfamiliar, why we continue explaining our choices to people who a...

This isn't a self-help episode. It's a validation chat.

If you've found yourself single in your late 20s or 30s after a breakup, engagement ending, divorce, or long-term relationship, this conversation is for you.

I am talking about the things people don't say out loud: feeling left behind while everyone else seems to be moving forward, grieving a future you had already planned, rebuilding a life you never wanted, and comparing your reality to an ex who appears to have moved on.

No generic advice. No "just focus on yourself."

Just...

Will your ex come back? Why hasn't your ex reached out? Does no contact really work? And how do you heal when you've been dumped by someone you still love?

In this episode, I explore the psychology behind heartbreak, attachment, and why so many people stay emotionally stuck waiting for an ex to return.

You'll learn why silence feels so painful, why some exes never reach out again, what actually predicts reconciliation, and how to stop putting your life on hold while waiting for closure.

This episode covers:

• Will my ex co...

In this episode, I talk about why it's so hard to move on after a breakup when you still believe your ex had so much potential.

If you've been dumped, blindsided, or left heartbroken after a long-term relationship, you may find yourself obsessing over who your ex could have been rather than who they actually were. I talk about heartbreak healing, anxious attachment, relationship grief, emotional unavailability, waiting for someone to change, overthinking after a breakup, and why attachment to potential can keep you emotionally stuck.

We explore how to stop romanticising the future you...

In this episode, I’m opening up about what it was really like selling the house I shared with my ex after our breakup. This isn’t just about moving house, it’s about letting go of a chapter of life, healing emotionally, and learning how to move forward without bitterness.

I wanted this conversation to feel like sitting down with a friend, so I’m sharing the honest emotions behind leaving a home full of memories, the mindset shifts that helped me heal, and what I did to protect my peace during such a huge life transiti...

In this episode, I talk about the comparison trap after heartbreak comparing yourself to your ex, your ex’s new partner, people moving on faster than you, happy couples, engagements, and everyone who seems okay while you still feel heartbroken after being dumped.

I talk about breakup anxiety, anxious attachment, overthinking, checking your ex’s social media, emotional obsession, feeling replaced, loneliness, rejection, and the emotional pain of feeling left behind after a long-term relationship ends.

This episode is a deep conversation about heartbreak healing, rebuilding self-worth after a breakup, nervous system healing, emotional recovery, atta...

After going through a breakup I didn’t want, I quickly learnt how easy it is to fall into a situationship. Situationships feel feel addictive, emotionally intense, and impossible to let go of sometimes.

In this episode, I talk about situationships after heartbreak, anxious attachment, breakup healing, why emotionally inconsistent people can feel so hard to move on from after being rejected.

I explore how I fell into a siutationship & sometimes acting like you are okay and chill about them, can actually hurt you more because of your fear of abandonment, obsessive thinking after a br...

Going through a breakup you didn’t want can make you feel rejected, misunderstood, emotionally drained, and impossible to move on from the person you still love.

In this breakup healing podcast episode, I talk about heartbreak, anxious attachment, emotional pain, overthinking, self-worth, rejection, attachment styles, and how to stop trying to be understood by someone who has chosen to misunderstand you.

If you are struggling with:

✨breakup pain 

✨heartbreak healing

✨breakup anxiety

✨emotional attachment

✨being unable to let go

✨feeling emotionally abandoned

✨overthink...

How to heal after a breakup, move on from an ex, and learn how to be okay being single after being dumped. If you’re struggling with heartbreak, rejection, overthinking, or feeling not good enough after a breakup, this episode is for you.

In this episode of I talk about how to heal after a breakup when you were brutally dumped and the 10 deep limiting beliefs that can keep you stuck in heartbreak without even realising it.

If you’re trying to move on from an ex, rebuild confidence, or understand why being single feels so p...

Going through a breakup? Feeling pressure to glow up, move on fast, hit the gym, or prove your ex lost someone amazing? This episode is for you.

In this episode i talk about how to heal after a breakup, move on from an ex, rebuild confidence, and deal with the pressure to glow up after heartbreak.

So many people feel like after a breakup they need a revenge body, a dramatic transformation, or to look like they’re thriving. Society pushes that message but a lot of the pressure also comes from within.

Healing after a breakup? Struggling to be single again? Worried you’ll never meet the right person? This episode will help you feel peaceful, confident, and grounded in your single season.

In this episode I talk about how to heal after heartbreak, stop worrying about meeting someone, and learn how to genuinely enjoy being single again. If you’re trying to move on from an ex, rebuild confidence, trust the timing of your life, or let go of pressure around relationships, this conversation is for you.

This episode is built around the powerful mind...

Struggling to get over a breakup? Wondering how to move on after heartbreak or why you still miss your ex even when you know they weren’t right for you?

In this episode, I dive into 10 brutal truths about breakups that most people avoid , but understanding them is the key to real healing, self-growth, and moving on.

If you’re searching for real breakup advice, trying to figure out how to get over a breakup, or working through emotional healing after a relationship ends, this podcast episode will give you the clarity you need.

Th...

 I made this episode for anyone going through a breakup who feels stuck and can’t stop thinking about their ex. I know how it feels to keep replaying everything, questioning your worth and wondering why you can’t just move on.

In this episode I share the mindset shift that helped me finally detach and start getting over my ex. This isn’t about pretending you don’t care, it’s about understanding why you feel so attached and how to actually let go.

I talk about why you’re not really missing them but the way t...

Struggling to move on after a breakup? Especially when you were the one who got left?

In this episode, I break down why 'focus on yourself' feels so hard after being dumped. If you’re overthinking, replaying memories, missing your ex, or feeling stuck in heartbreak, this episode explains the psychology behind it.

I cover breakup healing, attachment, rejection, and why letting go isn’t as simple as people say.

I actually challenge my own advice, so if you are SICK of reading 'just focus on yourself' then this episode will make you real...

Healing after a breakup doesn’t have a deadline and the pace you’re moving at? It says more about your strength than you think. 

In this episode of Coming Up For Air, I am talking about why slow healing is still powerful, how to stop comparing your journey, and what it really means to move on after heartbreak. If you’ve been feeling stuck, emotional, or frustrated with your progress after a breakup, this conversation will help you reframe everything. This is your reminder: you’re not behind, you’re healing. 

🎧 In this episode: 

1. Why heal...

What happens when your ex moves on quickly… and the relationship actually lasts?

In this episode, I share my perspective three years later and talk about the emotions that come with watching someone you once loved build a long-term relationship with someone else. I discuss how to cope with the comparisons, the questions that come up, and how focusing on your own growth can slowly shift your perspective over time.

This is an honest conversation about healing, acceptance, and how life can evolve in ways you never expected after a breakup.

...

There’s a quiet pain in feeling like life has moved on without you.

In this episode, I talk about what it’s like to be left while everyone around you seems to be moving forward. Friends at different life stages, a future that no longer exists, and the loneliness of being in an in-between space you never chose.

This episode is about coping mentally and physically when comparison hits, when your world feels paused, and when you’re just trying to find your footing again. If you feel left behind, you’re not broken, you’re h...

2026 is the Year of the Horse , a year of freedom, courage, and forward motion. In this episode, I explore how the Horse’s energy can help you move past heartbreak, restore your vitality, and reconnect with your true self. Learn practical ways to reclaim momentum, set boundaries, follow your desires, and trust your heart. Whether you’re navigating loss or seeking alignment, this episode guides you to move boldly, live fully, and step into life on your own terms. 

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Single on Valentine’s Day? Congratulations, you’re doing it right. In this episode, we reclaim the day for yourself, celebrating independence, self-love, and the power of choosing your own joy. We explore meaningful ways to honour your life, your growth, and your relationships beyond romance , including how to handle seeing an ex with someone else, so you can fully own this day as your own.

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Join Us on Patreon - ⁠pa...

This episode explores the in-between phase after heartbreak, when the old version of you no longer fits and the new one hasn’t arrived yet. 

I talk about identity loss, emotional waves, nervous system regulation, loneliness, and practical ways to cope without rushing healing. This is a slow, grounding episode for anyone living inside transition. 

Nothing is wrong.
Something is reorganizing. 

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Join Us on Patreon - ⁠patreon.com/ComingUpF...

This episode is for anyone who’s realised they’re spending more time thinking about their ex than actually living their own life. We talk about how heartbreak quietly hijacks your attention, how “waiting” can become a way of life, and why obsessing over what someone else is doing keeps you stuck. It’s an honest conversation about reclaiming your time, your energy, and your one precious life and choosing yourself instead of watching someone who has already moved on.

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 This episode explores the quiet, unspoken costs of staying in relationships that slowly erode your peace, self-trust, and sense of self. We talk about the things love should never ask you to sacrifice, how to recognise when hope becomes self-abandonment, and how to reclaim yourself after loving deeply. If you’re rebuilding after heartbreak, this episode offers clarity, compassion, and permission to want love that feels safe.

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This episode is for anyone who’s healing, starting over, or quietly rebuilding their life. We’re talking about levelling up without pressure, rushing, or forcing change. Instead, this is about slow, meaningful growth, nervous-system safety, and learning to trust yourself again. If you’re coming out of heartbreak, grief, or a season that changed you, this episode is a reminder that you don’t need to become someone new to move forward. Softness can still create a beautiful, aligned life. Want More Like This - https://stan.store/Loula 

My New Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/move...

 Happy new Year to you all. Whether you are going into the New Year still healing from something that happened in 2025 or even before that I have got you. A gentle episode to catch up talk a little bit on goals and one big piece of advice to kick start your year. The whole of January I am taking a calmer approach to setting the tone for the year so you feel supported but motivated for the year ahead wherever you are in your healing journey. 

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My N...

This episode is for anyone who made it to Christmas after a breakup and is wondering why it still feels a little unsteady.

I talk about why Christmas can bring emotions back up even when you’ve been healing, why missing someone doesn’t mean you want them back, and why this season isn’t a setback — it’s a pause that reveals how much you’ve actually grown. This isn’t surface-level breakup advice or forced positivity. It’s grounding, honest reframes for navigating Christmas when life looks different than you expected.

If you’re listening on Ch...

After a breakup, it’s not the ending that shapes you it’s the decisions you make next. In this episode, I talk about the quiet, everyday choices that either keep you stuck or slowly set you free. The boundaries you set, the habits you build, the thoughts you stop entertaining, and the version of yourself you choose to become when no one is watching. This one is about taking your power back, choosing growth over comfort, and trusting that the life you’re building after heartbreak can be even stronger than the one you lost. 

Want More Li...

In this episode, I open up about being single for four years and how every year of that journey reshaped me. From the heartbreak of my first Christmas alone, to rebuilding my life, losing my job, finding clarity, and finally choosing myself over rushing into love. I talk about why my healing had to come before any new relationship, and how this year I finally feel ready for something new because I’ve worked hard to become a version of myself who won’t bring chaos, old wounds, or old stories into my next chapter. If you’re on your o...

In this episode, I’m flipping December on its head. Instead of slipping into nostalgia or repeating old rituals, I’m sharing how I build future-facing, identity-shaping traditions that support the version of me I’m becoming.

I dive into why December feels so emotionally heavy and how I use it as the most intentional month of my year. Expect unconventional rituals, zero boring advice, and mindset shifts that help you step into your strongest, most future-focused self.

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 In this episode, I’m talking about what it’s really like to go into December single not the Instagram version, but the honest, emotional, surprisingly empowering reality of it. I share the deeper mindset shifts, the things people never say out loud, and the ways this season can actually feel lighter, calmer, and more grounding when you’re on your own. 

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In today’s episode, I’m opening up about the deeply personal journey of rebuilding my self-worth after being broken down by someone I loved. I talk about the difference between who I truly am and what someone else once made me feel, and how I’ve had to remind myself that my value isn’t defined by another person’s choices. 

I share the small steps, the emotional shifts, and the daily acts of care that helped me slowly reclaim the parts of myself I lost along the way. If you’ve ever felt abandoned, replaced, or “not enoug...

Every year I do a birthday episode. This year has been interesting and hard but I have managed to reflect on why its been a tough year. I also knew that my 32s were going to be a year of growth in every area of my life. 

I have had to apply so much of the work I did in therapy to different areas of my life too. I share my mindset shifts with you & why I feel like the year of being 33 will be the best year I have had since I turned 29 and went through m...