Myths Your Teacher Hated Podcast

This week on MYTH, three soldiers are going to decide that military life is not for them. You'll discover that you should plan better when you desert from the royal army, that rich people have always paid starvation wages to line their own pockets, and that you should always trust strange old ladies. Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's a listener request story about three arrogant army surgeons.

Source: German Folklore

It's a Halloween miracle! That's right, it's a second spooky season episode for your trick or treating shenanigans. This is the Halloween special for my other show, Saturday Morning Roleplay - an actual-play podcast that uses a variety of tabletop roleplaying games (TTRPGs) to create stories based on our favorite cartoon shows of yore. This episode features The Recyclors, a trio of eco-conscious transforming robots as they attend their very first costume party with their human sidekick Sprocket. Unfortunately, things quickly get out of hand turning this Halloween bash into a monster mash!

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This week on MYTH, it's our annual Halloween special! You'll learn that deadly snakes love violets, that love can hurt, and that father doesn't always know best. Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet a terrible monster that gets its name from its habit of eating the dead.

Source: Japanese Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll ride once more with King Arthur as he begins his rule over London.  You'll see that half-demons give the best advice, that building a castle basically makes it yours, and that being polite in a fight can get you killed. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a king will have an encounter with a giant and Nix Nought Nothing.

Source: Arthurian Legend

This week on MYTH, we'll voyage to Syria for a listener request story.  You'll see that sometimes you forget that you have a sister, that you should never gaslight women, and that you should help out with the chores. Then, in Gods and Monsters, two woodcutter friends will get into trouble.

Source: Syrian Folklore

This week on MYTH, it's one of my all-time favorite stories about mighty Thor.  You'll discover that you should be more careful about where your magic hammer is, that some gods can really rock a dress, and that you shouldn't offer up someone else's hand in marriage to solve your own problem. Then, in Gods and Monsters, the children of Loki are going to put the fear of Ragnarok into the gods.

Source: Norse Mythology

This week on MYTH, we'll get the rest of the story from one of our early trickster gods.  You'll discover that beards are bad for the environment, that you should always be on the lookout for hidden swords, and that you really don't want to know where your food comes from. Then, in Gods and Monsters, the Princess of the Fireflies will send her many suitors on a daring and deadly quest.

Source: Shinto Mythology

This week on MYTH, awful things lurk in the bogs of Lincolnshire.  You'll learn that swamps are deathtraps in the dark, that even goddesses can die, and that sometimes you need to keep your mouth shut. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a hideous dragon will rampage across Northumbria.

Source: English Folklore

This week on MYTH, it's another listener requested story.  You'll discover that incarnations of time hang out together, that being kind and polite goes a very long way, and that wandering around in a blizzard looking for out of season fruit is a bad idea. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a gamekeeper will stumble across something magical, but with a catch.

Source: Czech Fairy Tale

This week on MYTH, it's time for another exciting chapter from the chronicles of Lacplesis the Bearslayer.  You'll discover the truth of Laimdota's betrayal, why you should never trust nobility, and that cabins in the woods aren't always bad. Then, in Gods and Monsters, two men will share the friendship of a lifetime.

Source: Latvian Mythology

This week on MYTH, it's a listener request story. You'll learn that you shouldn't claim your kids have superpowers they don't have, that kings are greedy, and that the fae strike a hard bargain. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a tricksy water spirit will kidnap some unlucky children.

Source: German Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll head back to the home of the Meitei people of Manipur. You'll discover that birds are very, very old, that simple things get complicated when superlatives are involved, and that it helps to remember your own age. Then, in Gods and Monsters, primordial god brothers will compete to rule the universe.

Source: Meitei Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll head down under for an Aboriginal tale of the dangers of a sweet tooth. You'll see that bees are pretty oblivious, that honey hunting is serious business, and that it's gross to use those around you selfishly. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a lizard will learn to be more careful about playing with his boomerangs.

Source: Australian Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're journeying to the French countryside for a sisterly fable. You'll learn that fairies may not have a clear grasp on what a gift is, that no good deed goes unpunished, and that jealousy can sometimes be a literal snake in the grass. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a tricksy fox will try to become a deadly wolf.

Source: French Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll travel through the mists of ancient Korea for a story of the protector of Seoul. You'll learn that palaces make the best meals, that laborers are smarter than kings, and that volcanoes are friends with the wind. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a tiger will get into a battle of wits with a bunny rabbit.

Source: Korean Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're diving back into the 1001 Nights for the next Voyage of Sinbad the Sailor. You'll learn that you should always read the fine print, that there are worse fates than being eaten by cannibals, and that kings make bad friends. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a brave traveler will try to outsmart a ghoul.

Source: Middle Eastern Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're heading to the days of legend for the Maori tale of creation. You'll discover that being a clingy couple is bad for everyone's wellbeing, that even gods get cold, and that some creatures have poorly-defined jobs. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a fiery volcano goddess will seek her new home.

Source: Maori Mythology

This week on MYTH, we're heading to the province of Quebec in Canada for some supernatural warnings. You'll learn that you shouldn't pay for a flight with your soul, that air travel has always been hell, and that you shouldn't drink and cast dark magic. Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll learn the secret to hunting a ghostly spirit.

Source: French Canadian Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're headed to Germany for a listener request story. You'll see that it's rough being a fairytale mother, that magic mirrors are honest but snarky, and that you shouldn't accept gifts from strangers when someone is trying to kill you. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a thirsty little boy will disobey his mother and experience weird consequences.

Source: Germanic Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll dive into a particularly bawdy tale of French folklore. You'll learn that fairies can grant some very strange powers, that it's hard to speak around a mouthful of cotton, and that knights can make a fortune with this one weird trick. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a woman will get tired of her sexuality and separate herself from it. Literally.

Source: French Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're riding back to the court of the legendary King Arthur for the next part of his story. You'll learn that rules are meaningless to the rich, that magic swords are awesome, and that Merlin always has the next plot hook. Then, in Gods and Monsters, Mr. Vinegar is going to learn a lesson in financial security.

Source: Arthurian Legend

This week on MYTH, we're heading to Korea for a strange feud between a farmer and a frog. You'll see that bullfrogs can grow to enormous size, that rich men are always evil, and that it's not nice to trick someone into marriage. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a proud papa mole is going to seek the best possible husband for his daughter.

Source: Korean Folklore

This week on MYTH, it's time for another exciting chapter from the chronicles of Lacplesis the Bearslayer.  You'll learn that you should never trust a Crusader, that lords are easy to bribe, and that sometimes evil gets the last laugh. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a young man will be gifted magical music by a ghost.

Source: Latvian Mythology

This week on MYTH, it's the conclusion to the annual New Year's special! You'll see that narrators get annoyed easily, that the Sun isn't as friendly as the Moon, and that there's still more things to blame Toad for. Then, in Gods and Monsters, Anansi the spider will go a-courting with his frenemy Nothing.

Source: Basoko Mythology

This week on MYTH, it's the annual New Year's special! You'll learn that toads shouldn't try to create things, that the moon is extremely powerful, and that bananas make the perfect snack for new mothers. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a fish and a leopard will fall in love with the same elephant.

Source: Basoko Mythology

This week on MYTH, it's once again time for the annual holiday special! You'll learn that being a magical snowman isn't all it's cracked up to be, that stoves are very sexy, and that you shouldn't steal a dog's bone (especially while it's still chewing on it). Then, in Gods and Monsters, a jolly Christmas elf is going to fly into a murderous rage over dairy.

Source: Danish Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll meet one of the great trickster figures of those stolen away to the Americas - Br'er Rabbit. You'll see that capitalism is cruel, that all tricksters love food, and that if a deal seems too good to be true, it probably is. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a man will get a job working for the Devil.

Source: Costa Rican/Cuban Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're off to Eastern Europe for a Slavic mix of several traditional tales. You'll discover that military pensions suck, that breaking and entering is a good idea, and that you should drink wine with demons. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a monster hunted by the Witcher will sneak into your bedroom to drain your blood and infest your nightmares.

Source: Russian/Slavic Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're headed to India for a strange, old inversion of the sleeping beauty trope. You'll learn that dolls can talk, that you shouldn't trust people who are too flexible, and that you should stay out of magical doors. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a barber will match wits with a demon with the help of his trusty mirror.

Source: Indian Folklore

This week on MYTH, it's once again time for my favorite tradition - the annual Halloween special. You'll see that folklore fathers are the worst, that going in search of fear may not be safe but it can be rewarding, and that you can do a lot with the right tools. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a demonic spirit lurks in the seas off the coast of Scotland.

Source: German/Scottish Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll travel to Korea for a tale from when tigers used to smoke tobacco pipes. You'll learn that even supernatural bureaucracy makes mistakes, that the king of the underworld is usually a pretty chill guy, and that you should always have proof for your post-mortem messages. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a tiger will face off against its greatest foe - a fussy baby.

Source: Korean Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're headed to the Philippines for the epic love story of a couple we already met. You'll learn that vines can be a portal to the heavens just like in Super Mario Brothers, that you should listen when the sun tells you no, and how babies are really born. Then, in Gods and Monsters, the crabs will declare war on the ocean.

Source: Filipino Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll catch up with our old pal Sinbad for his third legendary voyage. You'll learn that you should really take the hint after the ocean tries to kill you twice, that it pays to know your classic mythology (even inside other mythology), and that it rarely ends well to be a nameless red shirt on a dangerous voyage with a folk hero. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a cousin of the great roc will teach us the secrets of modern obstetrics.

Source: Middle Eastern Folklore

This week on MYTH, we'll travel to modern Quebec for two stories from French Canada. You'll discover that some royal relationships are inevitable (and that's not necessarily a bad thing), that unhappy fairies can make their grumpiness everyone else's problem, and that you should always know where your magic ring is. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a beautiful woman getting kidnapped by pirates doesn't usually turn out as well as it did for Elizabeth Swan in Pirates of the Caribbean.

Source: French Canadian Folklore

This week on MYTH, it's off to southern Turtle Island for two tales of powerful supernatural creatures. You'll see that sky gods are assholes, that boiling water is the best medicine, and that gambling is a risky business, even with a magical ace in the hole. Then, in Gods and Monsters, you can't trust anyone when there's a shapeshifting ogress around.

Source: Cherokee Mythology

This week on MYTH, we're headed north of north to meet some very unusual husbands. You'll learn that short kings make the best providers, that kayaks can be turned into submarines with a little know-how (and a lot of magic), and that you should be careful where you throw rocks. Then, in Gods and Monsters, handsome strangers are not always who they appear to be.

Source: Inuit Mythology

This week on MYTH, it's off to merry olde England for one of the most famous stories of Arthurian legend. You'll see that kings are just better than everyone else, that even a holy duty is nothing compared to a jousting tournament, and that wizards are tricksy fellows. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a troublesome spirit is going to get into a battle of wits with a farmer.

Source: Arthurian Legend

This week on MYTH, it's off to a mysterious kingdom on the border of ancient Persia by way of Hungary.  You'll see that the right spouse makes all the difference, that almost anyone can be charmed by a purring cat, and that you should never trust a magician who lives in a cave. Then, in Gods and Monsters, a young man will try to win a princess' hand with a story of a spectacular pig.

Source: Hungarian Folklore

This week on MYTH, we're headed to Japan for a look at the duality of foxes.  You'll learn that you should never make bets while drunk, that nothing good happens on a moor, and that tricks are less tricky when you expect them. Then, in Gods and Monsters, there's no telling just how much a single act of kindness can change things.

Source: Japanese Folklore

This week on MYTH, it's time for another exciting chapter from the chronicles of Lacplesis the Bearslayer.  You'll learn that God is a thief, that the Devil is extremely jealous, and that humans used to only have one eye. Then, in Gods and Monsters, hostilities are about to erupt in the Silly Goose War.

Source: Latvian Mythology