Raising Godly Boys Minute

A battle rages—and boys are on the front lines. They are daily bombarded by anti-Christian philosophies:

Relativism—disrupts truth and biblical morality,

Humanism—teaches that a person must depend on himself, not God, if this is true, then why do we even need God?

And evolution—teaches that we evolved by mere chance, the very existence of a loving Creator is ridiculed.

Don’t let these worldly philosophies destroy your son’s faith in Christ. Teach him to stand on the solid Word of God.

Training your son in today’s s...

When you were a kid, did you ever play with transformers?

Boys love the way those cars and trucks transform into really cool robots. Plus, the storyline of Autobots battling it out against the evil Decepticons is exciting.

You probably don’t play with transformers anymore, but in some ways, you’re still like a transformer. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

Are you teaching your son to stand strong against the world’s deceit? Victory over evil is only possible when we al...

Have you ever walked across a rickety bridge and wondered if it could manage the weight?

If you are carrying something heavy that fear can be very real.

Carrying truth can be like that. Especially when you are carrying truth to a boy.

Make sure the bridge -- your connection to that boy -- is strong enough to carry the weight of that truth.

The reality with boys, particularly teens, is that simply telling them the truth isn’t enough. You’ve got to have a connection -- a bridge -- stro...

Everyone loves a good comeback story, so here’s one for you– paper maps are making a resurgence!

With digital maps built into many of our cars, you would think paper map sales would continue to fall. But people are realizing that print maps are more helpful than GPS when you’re trying to learn the best way to navigate a new area.

This concept reminds me of why young men today so desperately need male mentors. Sure, your son can observe successful men on social media or on video. But in order to understand what i...

“Sit still!”

These words are a death sentence to a little boy's morale. 

There are times when boys need to sit still, like at a dentist's office. 

But much of the time we demand they sit still for our convenience, not their good. 
At home when families read or at school during lessons, boys are told to bottle up their God-given energy and focus. They run the risk of getting in trouble when they don’t. 

This is unfair, especially in light of simple solutions.

When y...

Ahhh … vacation!

Do you remember the last time you went on vacation? Before leaving, you probably spent time thinking about what clothes and other items you’d need at your destination. Then you probably gathered all those things together and packed them into a suitcase.

On this journey called parenthood, it’s even more important to bring everything necessary. Begin by packing love. Next, fold in joy. After that, squeeze in humor, laughter, and a bunch of fun. And, of course, don’t forget to include patience, gratitude, and forgiveness. This is just the beginning.

Fore!

If you’ve ever played golf, you’re probably familiar with the term “mulligan.” That’s a fancy word that simply means “do-over.” If you’re on the tee and you slice the ball off into the trees, you might shout, “Mulligan!” You’re basically saying that you want a second try.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could get a parenting “mulligan” every once in a while? Maybe you chose your favorite TV show over spending time with your son. Or maybe you reacted impatiently during a moment of frustration.

Even though you can’t have a...

Parents, have you been there?

Your son has tears in his eyes as he shows you that he got another “D” on his math test. You start explaining why perseverance is important, but his eyes glaze over. You decide to try a different approach.

“Son, did I ever tell you about the two classes I failed in middle school?” Your boy raises his eyebrows. You’ve piqued his interest.

It’s easy for us as parents to try lecturing to get our points across. But when Jesus walked on earth, he didn’t give long spee...

Your son is enjoying a day kayaking down a river. Suddenly, he hears rushing water, and sees rapids up ahead. His heart beats fast, and he begins to paddle forward, right into the waves.

In life, watching your son head straight into challenging territory can be a frightening and stressful experience. But there’s a reason God wired boys to crave adventure, excitement, and risk. Child development specialists have found that taking risks is an essential part of growing up, and gives boys excellent coping skills, self confidence, and the ability to fail well.

So do...

Ever heard the phrase “match the hatch”? It reminds fishermen that the best way to catch fish is to figure out what the fish are eating. But did you know this concept could help you get your teenage son involved in church, too?

Pay close attention to what activities your boy is drawn toward the most. Does he love music and playing an instrument? Encourage him to get involved in the church praise team. Is he into skateboarding? Search for a local Christian skater group. Does he love the adventure of video games? Get him involved with Chri...

Here’s something you’ll rarely hear shouted during a major league baseball game: “Great call, ump!”

Even the best, most experienced umpire will face constant criticism, taunting, and ridicule for every decision. Spectators only talk them if they are angry about a call that was made.

Consider this. Does your son feel like an umpire in his everyday life– constantly surrounded by criticism? At school, is he teased by his friends? Do his well-meaning teachers focus on the problems he missed? At home, do you remind him of the chores he didn’t do and the vege...

The baseball hall of fame is full of failures.

Consider Joe DiMaggio, one of the all-time top hitters. His batting average was .325. But even that great statistic means that Joe failed to hit the ball almost 70% of the time.

Unfortunately, in our society, boys do not receive the same margin for error. Young men naturally develop slower than their female peers, in both academics and emotional intelligence. But that is often ignored by educators, and boys are quickly labeled “slow” when they simply need more time to develop.

Let’s be like the baseba...

The player stands at the free throw line, preparing for a critical shot. He takes a few seconds to adjust his arms and his feet. He knows that the only way he can make this shot is if his whole body is in perfect alignment.

For your son, life is the same way. The only way he can succeed  is if his beliefs about himself are aligned with the ultimate truth of God’s word. This can be tough, in a society of gender fluidity and cultural relativism.

Regularly discuss with your son what God’s wor...

Your son proudly shows you a new scrape on his knee, reporting that he had a bike wreck while riding down a hill. You grab a bandaid and shake your head. It’s your son’s fifth injury of the week! How can you keep him safe when he seems to crave and seek out risk?

First, encourage him to focus on one or two skills, like skateboarding or snow skiing. Secondly, enroll him in classes so that he learns how to minimize injuries. Of course, don’t forget the helmet, elbow pads, and prayer of protection. And la...

Getting your young son to sit still for a church service, car ride, or class in school can be a challenge. But one school in Texas doesn’t have this problem. Why? Well, they’ve tripled recess time.

During the school day, the kindergartners and first graders at this school get four, 15 minute recess breaks outside each day. The teachers say the kids are more attentive than ever, and many have even decreased symptoms of ADHD.

So if your son seems grumpy and uncooperative today, why don’t you try a different kind of “time out”? Ta...

There’s something you can do as a family that can increase your son’s attention span, improve his vocabulary, foster deep conversation, and even boost your happiness as a parent. Sound good? Here’s the catch– your son may roll his eyes at first.

I’m talking about reading out loud as a family. Your son may think he’s too old for it now, but researchers have found that the benefits continue even as children become preteens or even teenagers.  

Find a compelling adventure book and read a chapter a night together. A good place...

“Your son is delayed.” Those words can fill you worry and even some fear as a parent. But did you know that your son may be perfectly normal, and the system may be incorrect?

Researchers have found that boys’ brains develop more slowly than their female peers’ brains. The public school system doesn’t often take this into account, and a student’s success is measured by standardized tests. This is also true when it comes to behavior. As a result, many boys are labeled delayed when it comes to emotions or intelligence, when, in reality, they will catch u...

Breakfast. School. Homework. Dinner. Does your son seem bored or disengaged in his day to day life? Here’s a simple way to add adventure, spontaneity, and excitement to his life: Get him outside!

Nature can actually change your son’s brain for the better. Studies have found that when someone regularly spends time outside, essential regions of the brain, like the hippocampus, grow and retain more gray matter. This makes it easier for your son to pay attention, learn, and remember things.

Start simple. Get a baseball and play catch in your backyard. Look onli...

His superman cape flies out behind him majestically, and he lifts his arms. “One, two, three!” Your five year old jumps off the swing set. A short time later, as you drive him to the emergency room with a broken arm, you wonder, “Why in the world did he do that?”

As parents, we remind our kids to be careful, but the truth is that boys don’t just want risk… they need it. Risky play helps your son learn to deal with nervous feelings, adapt to new situations, and improve his gross motor skills.

So what are...

“Take out the trash. This is the fourth time I’ve told you,” you tell your son. Your son says “What? I didn’t hear you.”

Here’s a fact that may not surprise you:  boys are biologically wired to be bad listeners. Studies have found that, when a boy and girl hear the same sound, the boy will hear it 10 times quieter than the girl will.  This is especially true if it’s a high frequency sound, like a woman’s voice.

Since 78% of teachers are female, it’s no wonder that boys are falling behind girls a...

There’s a bunch of excitement in the rocket industry. SpaceX and other companies are building gigantic rockets. They’re even planning Mars missions.

But before a rocket ever leaves the ground, there are countless hours of building and programming. Every part of the rocket is checked and double checked to make sure it’s ready for liftoff.

Before your son heads off for college or moves away for work, it’s important to prepare him for that big day. Make sure he has everything he needs to accomplish the mission of honoring the Lord with his...

During the California Gold Rush of 1849, thousands of prospectors panned for gold in mountain streams and riverbeds. But those prospectors who spent time, sweat, and effort digging into the earth were the ones most likely to strike it rich. Discovering a single vein of gold was worth way more than hundreds of gold flakes from the river.

Help your son strike it rich in terms of godly character. Show him—through personal example—how to dig deep into Scripture. It’s there that he’ll discover the incredible treasures of service, commitment, and integrity.

Remember: the more...

Do you remember your son taking his first steps? No doubt you had already been holding his hand—and helping him take one step in front of the other.

But eventually, the day came where he climbed to a stand, and took those first few steps all by himself. You cheered with joy and excitement.

Even though your son is no longer a toddler, continue to train him to walk in righteousness. Psalm chapter 1 provides excellent teaching. Show your son how to delight in the Lord and not to pursue a path of the selfishness an...

If you plan to go skiing, you wear ski boots. If you’re heading to the beach, you wear sandals. For a quick jog around the block, you wear running shoes.

You select your shoes based on the type of activity.

Similarly, when training, correcting, or playing with your son, it’s vital to select the appropriate tone for the task at hand. It’s also crucial that you understand your son’s personality so that you can most effectively connect with him.

At times, you may need to choose a serious tone. Other ti...

Have you ever broken an arm? Depending on the type of break, the doctor might have needed to set the bones straight before placing your arm in a cast. That cast kept your arm protected so that the broken bones could grow back together.

If your relationship with your son is broken, you also need to set things straight. Take time to allow the relationship to heal. This may require a season of rest and extra attention. You may need to cut out other activities so that you can devote extra time to helping the relationship rest...

Have you ever watched a stunt driver race his motorcycle up a steep ramp and into the air? Maybe he did a double backflip with a bunch of twists and turns.

Those crazy stunts require an incredible about of control. If the stuntman were to leave the ramp at the wrong angle, he’d land off target and experience an awful wipeout.

To succeed in life, your son also needs to be in control. Because boys are usually impulsive, self-control is one of the hardest lessons for them to learn. But a little self-control goes a...

Imagine sending an army to war without the tools or training to achieve victory. And yet, we are sending boys, ill-equipped, into a culture that seems to have declared war on boyhood.

The results are tragic. Boys are almost twice as likely to be put in special education and three times more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD. And each year, fewer young men enroll in higher education.

But changing these statistics is more simple than you may think. For example, the presence of one positive mentor can make a young man more likely to...

Fidgeting. Being loud. Having trouble staying seated. Running or climbing when it’s not appropriate.

We used to consider these normal behaviors for young boys.  But now, they are listed as symptoms of ADHD.

Attention disorders are certainly real. But in some cases, what if instead of changing our boys’ behavior, we need to adjust our approach as adults?

For instance–too much screen time and not enough exercise can make it hard for your son to sleep at night. In turn, being tired can make it hard for him to focus during the day...

You’re sitting at the dinner table, and you ask your son if he’s ready for basketball tryouts. Your son’s face starts to turn red. Suddenly, he stands up, pushes his plate away, and knocks his chair over intentionally as he leaves the room.

You’re confused. What caused this sudden anger outburst?

Researchers have discovered that when boys seem angry or withdrawn, they are often actually anxious.

So if your son seems angry for no reason, consider what may be stressing him out. Give him time to cool off. Get on his l...

You’ve no doubt heard of Babe Ruth, who set a record for most number of home runs in his baseball career– seven hundred and fourteen.

But here’s a statistic you probably haven’t heard– Babe Ruth’s total career strikeouts. One thousand three hundred and thirty. That’s right– he struck out far more than he hit homers.

When it comes to your own son, of course you want him to hit all the proverbial “home runs” in life. But don’t forget to let him fail, too. It can be hard for us parents to watch, b...

Is your son glued to a screen?

You’ve tried everything, but you just can’t pull your son away from his video games. Well here’s something to consider. Does your son’s real life give him the same opportunities for adventure that his virtual world does?

Of course, video games are addictive by design. But researchers have found that boys also turn to gaming out of boredom, seeking freedom and risk.

Try adding a few more “yesses” to your son’s life. Let him ride his bike down a hill, take a walk in the...

Billy Graham was one of the most influential evangelists of the 20th century. He boldly proclaimed the Gospel to over 200 million people. But in addition to his important preaching ministry, Billy Graham also had an important message for fathers.

He said,
“A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society.”

As a dad, you have the incredible privilege of raising your son to love the Lord and follow His ways. This brings with it the responsibility of providing a strong, Christ-centered foun...

Gangs. They are responsible for almost half of the violent crime in the United States. And yet, boys and men continue to join these groups in droves, some recruited as early as elementary school. Why?

Here’s a big reason. As boys interact socially, they are always asking three questions: “Who is with me?” “Who is in charge?” And, “What is our mission?”

Often, church groups and social clubs, although well-intentioned, fail to answer those questions. If we aren’t answering these questions for boys, we will surely lose them to groups that will.

To ensure yo...

In the old days of coal mining, canaries were brought into mines. If the bird died, the miners knew they needed to escape, because there was something noxious in the atmosphere.

In our society today, boys are just like those canaries. Many are faltering in every area, including school, relationships, and mental health.

But there is one simple thing that can make young men more likely to make healthier choices, do better in school, and have a stronger self esteem. And that is the presence of a positive mentor.

Think you’re not eq...

Boys love the story of David and Goliath. Afterall, anytime there’s a battle involving giants with swords, it’s sure to capture attention.

But too often, boys fail to apply important lessons from David’s life. Before David defeated Goliath, he had learned to depend on God when battling lions that attacked his sheep. By relying on God in these smaller tests of faith, David had confidence that God would help him no matter what giant situation came his way.

What giants are your son facing? At school, is he struggling academically? Are bullies harass...

Do you use your phone to send text messages?

According to statistics, around 80% of Americans do. Those text messages are often sent to family, friends, and co-workers. And now, more than ever, millions of children also carry a smart phone.

If you’ve decided to provide your son a phone, make sure he uses it responsibly. But in addition to that, use text messaging as a way to connect with him. If you’re out of town during one of his sporting events or other activities, send a quick text:
Hey buddy. You’re in my...

We need to listen to our children. One old-school method of dealing with children was “The children should be seen and not heard.” Connecting with our child’s heart, especially our sons, is critical to having a loving relationship with them, and connection begins with listening and understanding. We must value who they are and who God has made them to be.

As we start to listen more to them, we will grow in understanding of who our child is and what makes them thrive. Become a student of your child. Learn what inspires them and what they a...

Two of the most difficult words for a parent to say are, “I’m sorry.” Are you saying them enough?

As parents, we should ask for forgiveness from our kids if we lose our temper, or don’t control our tongue, or if we jump to conclusions without gathering the necessary facts.

The difficulty is that we can feel vulnerable, inadequate, and even slightly humiliated when apologizing.

But here’s the truth: Your son or daughter will grow to love and respect you even more if you apologize. Humbling yourself demonstrates—through action—a love so stro...

Glance into your purse or wallet and you’ll probably see a few dollar bills. Written on those dollar bills are these words: In God We Trust.

It’s nice having that motto on our coins and bills—but it’s even more important to demonstrate that motto in our lives … that we teach this to our sons.

Has your son trusted in Jesus as his Savior? If so, are you teaching him the importance of trusting in the Lord for daily guidance?

Proverbs 3:5 says,
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and l...

Glance into your purse or wallet and you’ll probably see a few dollar bills. Written on those dollar bills are these words: In God We Trust.

It’s nice having that motto on our coins and bills—but it’s even more important to demonstrate that motto in our lives … that we teach this to our sons.

Has your son trusted in Jesus as his Savior? If so, are you teaching him the importance of trusting in the Lord for daily guidance?

Proverbs 3:5 says,
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and l...