Perfectionism Rewired

White knuckling your way through dumpster fires + stacked deadlines might *seem impressive* but underneath constantly second-guessing yourself, obsessively counting of how much you accomplished while beating yourself up — are hidden costs eating away at your efficiency (and overall ability to enjoy the life you’ve worked so hard to create). This episode names what you couldn’t explain...until now.

Resources Mentioned In Episode 255:

What if feeling your feelings didn’t mean falling apart — but actually gave you more control, not less? If white knuckling or pushing through is the best way you know how to feel your feelings. You’re not alone.Discover the hidden mistake keeping perfectionists stuck feeling on edge, why you can never outthink your feelings and the right way to feel your feelings.

Want to bring rewiring into your reality? Where being confident, certain and playful is just how you roll? Perfectionist Solutions 1-1 coaching is your next step.

Mentioned In Episode 254:

You’re doing everything right. You’re ambitious, successful + driven. So why is it your energy is nonexistent, patience is razor-thin + your mind can't stop overthinking? If your days are starting with dread and ending in exhaustion — this episode is your wake-up call. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or accessing your abilities in a way burnt out you could never compete with, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on th...

Feel like you're working hard but not seeing the progress you want? It's NOT YOU or your PERFECTIONISM – it's your Person Account™ . Discover my proprietary framework that’s changing the game for Perfectionist Solution’s clients, and will do the same for you. 

In this Episode You’ll Learn:

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire

In this Episode You’ll Learn:

"Part of the reason I stay super busy is bc if I stop to rest l'll ruminate. And if I ruminate, I start spiraling. And if I spiraling I'm like a nosediving plane" Sound familiar? Discover the ANSWER to WHY you get stuck in your most annoying perfectionist tendencies, like ruminating, catastrophizing, overthinking every small mistake etc. 

Plus the 6 reasons your perfectionist brain holds on to outdated habits,  how chronic stress impacts your brain’s ability to change, the role of back and white thinking in reinforcing unhelpful neural pathways, why past experiences trick your brain into seei...

Constantly overthinking? Still ruminating over that convo with your boss? You're not alone. Uncover how perfectionistic tendencies like being super rigid, people pleasing, over-preparing, excessively worrying — are actually signs your perfectionistic brain is misfiring. Plus, learn the neuroscience-backed solution to take charge of your perfectionist tendencies + start feeling better. 

TIMESTAMPS:

00:00-What Makes Perfectionistic Brains Unique
04:02-How Perfectionist Tendencies Operate

07:32-Neuroscience Behind Overthinking

09:25-Catastrophizing Your Way to Chronic Stress

10:37-Ruminating + Other Perfectionist Tendencies
11:58-Neuroplasticy to rewire the brain
14:03-What Gets In The Way of Rewiring
15:59-Black + White Thinking

Feeling overwhelmed? Stressed out? Anxious? Being vague about your emotions is like saying you're "craving food" for dinner—utterly unhelpful! Your perfectionist brain needs precision to create the right action plan for you. Learn why labeling your emotions accurately is crucial for regulating your body's responses and the essential skillset all perfectionists need to understand their emotions.

TIMESTAMPS:

01:08-Controlling of emotions
03:13-How to stop feeling overwhelmed
05:28-Muffin-Cupcake Experiment
07:54-Why Words Hold Physiological Power
09:48-Emotional Regulation skills
12:14-What the skill of emotional granularity buys you
14:23-How to rewire you...

It’s impossible to stop self-comparison as a perfectionist. You.Are.Going.To.Compare.Yourself and here’s the best way to do it! Discover 6 empowering ways to rewire unhealthy self-comparisons, perfectionism trash trades, how to tell if you’re fear-based striving, live coaching on 4 IRL examples of comparing, the only skillset you need for this to work 100% of the time  and a tool to instantly upgrade comparing yourself 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case sce...

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT. Press play.Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Tactical "stop it" approaches to self-comparison DO NOT WORK for perfectionists. Find out WHY along with the hidden costs of comparing yourself, why the approach you’ve taken to stopping self-comparison hasn't worked, what you actually need to do and scientifically what causes perfectionists to have an even harder time than non-perfectionistic people in rewiring this habit. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectio...

Comparing yourself all the time? Tired of feeling like you never quite measure up...no matter how much you accomplish? It's not just YOU! Discover the sneaky specific ways self-comparison shows up for perfectionists, the difference between self-awareness + self-coaching, why self-comparison is not your fault but is your responsibility to change.  

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the...

Tired of getting tangled in your own words? Overcomplicating it? Asking "Does that make sense?" at the end of every sentence? Discover why you can't stop talking (even though you REALLY want to), the science behind overexplaining for perfectionists, how overexplaining is harmful to your health mentally, emotionally and physically, and why its a coping skill you want to retire ASAP.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFUL...

Craving Certainty? Need to be absolutely 100% sure before making a move? You’re not alone. In this episode, I unravel why the struggle of dealing with uncertainty holds high performance perfectionists back, how to recognize uncertainty avoidance in your own life and tools to take control of the fear, uncertainty and doubt (so it stops controlling you!). Discover practical strategies to break free from the cage of high uncertainty avoidance and gain the confidence to move forward, before every detail is known.

Ready to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create? Waiting for the right ti...

Are You Waiting for the Right Time? It’s time to stop waiting for the perfect time. Feeling 100% ready (or whatever ideal set of conditions you’ve been waiting for) is an illusion that keeps you from taking charge of your life right now. Learn how to recognize if you’re giving your power over to ideal circumstances and how to take control. 

Ready to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create? Waiting for the right time won't get you there. Uncover how to joyfully play in the arena of your life by rewiring your perfect...

Ever wish you had more confidence?  Too many driven perfectionists wait for more confidence before making bold moves, mistaking insecurity for preparation. But waiting is killing your confidence slowly. 'm clearing up all the  confusion around getting more confidence so you can stop waiting for it to show up and giving you the exact formula  to get more confidence today!

Ready to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create? Waiting for more confidence on the sidelines won't get you there. Uncover how to joyfully play in the arena of your life by rewiring your perfectionistic ten...

 Lifelong learner but not taking bold action? I used to wait for more time, more confidence, more certainty, more information, more money and more support. Then I’d get MORE of what I was waiting for….and still find excuses to keep waiting. Until one day I quit waiting for more. Find out why perfectionists love to wait for more, precisely how this keeps you stuck and what happens IRL when perfectionists stop waiting for more information. 

Ready to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create? Waiting for more on the sidelines won't get you there...

Imagine feeling empowered, calm and grounded. You trust yourself. The incessant judgey voice in your head has been replaced with a witty, encouraging narrator. Your relationships built on truth. You say no to stuff you don’t want to do, without explanation. You take care of yourself FIRST. You've upgraded from exhausted to excited. Want that to be your reality? It starts with Impeccable Boundaries. Listen to learn how to create your own Impeccable Boundaries

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everythin...

Just as you finally get everything under control, life throws you ANOTHER curve ball. Seems like no matter what you do, you never get a moment of peace bc It’s Always Something. Discover exactly how to break down the elusive barriers that perpetually seem to get in the way of perfectionists and equip you with practical tools to let go of the chaos so you can navigate life’s unexpected twists without getting overwhelmed. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything y...

Discover why being proud of yourself is a mission critical skill for all perfectionists and how to rewire your brain to see your value. Un-learn the misconceptions currently getting in the way of you being proud of you and how to exit the inadequacy cycle. Thinking I don't have anything to be proud of? I'm giving you 5 reasons that you can be proud of yourself + the tool I use everyday to be proud of myself NO MATTER HAT I have or haven't accomplished.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whe...

Do compliments make you uncomfy? Tired of constantly achieving and never feeling satisfied?  Discover the *real reason* you’re still chasing validation from other people (it has nothing to do with accomplishments or self-esteem) and how to stop relying on external praise + recognition. Perfectionism Optimized client, bravely shares her story of being an Oscar-winning superstar vying for attention, feeling undeserving of praise and constructing her whole life around getting approval (and avoiding rejection). Hear step-by-step how she dropped the fears of not being good enough + being judged by others, let go of needing anyone’s approval and rewired recognition on he...

Tired of thinking about work during family time? Feeling guilty whenever work takes you away from your family? Learn step-by-step how to LET GO OF GUILT. Perfectionism Optimized client Nicole shares how she went from mom guilt overload to missing her kids' first day of school and her entire family celebrating it. Also, discover the why behind your guilt, cost of continuing to carry guilt and how other approaches to stop feeling guilty simply *don't work* for perfectionists. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DEC...

You've been thinking about fear of failure all wrong. Get it right and find out what fear of failure is protecting you from, the underlying reasons behind fear of failure, the sneaky ways fear of failure shows up for perfectionists, what fear of failure really is (not good enough) why popular advice for overcoming fear of failure isn’t helpful for perfectionists and practical steps you can take today to dissolve this pattern.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESE...

Ever feel like you're constantly walking a tightrope? Expected to be confident but not too intimidating. Be assertive, but don't get aggressive. As women in leadership we've developed coping mechanisms to navigate these obstacles - like over-preparing, always getting it right and making sure we're well liked. These strategies have kept us afloat, but at what cost? Putting our careers ahead of our values, keeping one eye on the inbox even at the playground. So, how do we break free from this cycle? How do we burn bright without burning out and lead without losing ourselves? Your answers are...

Discover why proving yourself is career poison, how to recognize the hidden, nuanced ways proving shows up (like when you put $$ in tip jar) and what lies beneath this constant pressure to constantly prove yourself. Finally get to the source of why even when you're at the top of your game, what's driving you to overwork, question your value and seek validation at every turn. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning...

Did I make the wrong choice? Why does this bother me so much? Am I letting them down? What if I fail? Spinning in self-judgement and second guessing every small move you make, your brain won't stop replaying magnifying your mistakes. Find out the REAL reason your inner critic won't shut up and how to start asking better questions so you can feel better right NOW.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turn...

Discover the clues you’re clenching that you’d NEVER GUESS are rooted in your perfectionistic tendencies. Plus how Perfectionism Optimized client Molly reversed her Osteoporosis diagnosis and regained her sex drive. Learn why we clench, what’s happening inside your body + brain, the 5 core pillars key to releasing the clench
 

You don't have to white knuckle your perfectionism. And if you feel like you are, I invite you to come coach with me 1-on-1 inside Perfectionism Optimized, where you'll learn how to take charge of your perfectionistic tendencies, which means you'll finally feel as awesome as your...

Signs you’re programming your kids for anxiety without knowing it, how children pick up anxiety from perfectionistic parents,  why traditional methods like therapy are 15x slower at achieving results, what *actually works* for caring, busy, perfectionist parents who want a physiology of excellence and how developing a physiology of excellence gives you unrivaled resilience, presence, and emotional intelligence

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it?  Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to  *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside...

Fascia is the Wi-Fi of your insides, with over 250 million sensory receptors weaving through its matrix - it’s how emotions are made and where we feel our sensations, instincts and intuition. But if you tend to overthink, ruminate, catastrophize or stress out, you're compromising your fascia which impacts your body's ability to function optimally + think clearly. Discover why fascia is the missing puzzle piece for perfectionists and how to detect if there's dead zones in your own fascial network- where your sensations, instincts and intuition intersect. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you f...

Stressed out, frustrated or having trouble sleeping? Stress is physiological for perfectionists and our physiological stress impacts our brain, our ability to speak, to think and our emotional agility. So if you want to have the ability to take charge of perfectionism, you gotta solve stress at the source. Bc you don't have time to do 20 minutes of deep breathing when stressors pop up, you need a personalized process that works instantaneously fast. And that's the first thing I teach Perfectionism Optimized clients, how to de-stress level in any moment, so they can get back in charge. Discover how...

Racing through your days on hyper-speed but still not present for any of it? Discover how high-achieving architect Jessica went from pushing through "everything will be better once..." to being present during the most challenging time of her life, her mother’s passing. Hear from Jessica how Perfectionism Optimized coaching gave her the tools to stop the worry/wish cycle, metabolize her stress an handle excruciating times with confidence and grace, and why it's "the best thing I've ever done for myself, I think, in my entire life."

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time y...

Feeling like you can't relax on vacation? As perfectionists the way we relax is completely different than other people. Learn why and how to start relaxing on your own terms.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to  *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at...

Take the overwhelm out of perfectionism, starting today with the one SKILL SET you’ve never been taught. #truthbooth it’s the only skill set that’ll save you from a life that feels frustrating - like you’re always chasing happiness. Because when you put yourself in charge of your internal world and remove overwhelm- the way you show up in the world shifts. Like you're no longer snapping at your partner or seizing up with anxiety when looking at your email.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it...

Feel like you’re carrying the weight of the world? You want to be a present parent, crush it at work, keep it fresh with your partner, call your bestie back and drink your water, BUT when you compartmentalize and be whoever you need to be to get the result, you end up exhausted. Say goodbye to the exhausting cycle of squishing yourself to fit in. Trade being contrived for exuding confidence, with the only sustainable solution for ambitious perfectionistic people. Plus hear about that one time CLG sharted in her jumpsuit🤣

On paper, you’ve got it toget...

Feeling Clenchy? Discover the truth about what *really* happens when you let go of rigid rules that've made you super successful. I'm giving you the uncensored inside scoop on exactly wha happened when I stopped fisting, opened up to new possibilities and began to surf my own ocean--my achieving + energy increased 80%!!!!!  If you're exhausted or feel like it's always something, this episode will give you the fuel  to rise up. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your famil...

If you've ever felt trapped in a cycle of I should be past this and using your intellectual smarts as evil tools to hammer yourself with, this episode is for you. 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family or breaking generational cycles of Self-Criticism, Perfectionism Optimized private 1-1 coaching is how you expand your confidence, make your choices aligned with your values and *finally feel* as amazing as your life looks. Get your stress-free start today at...

Fighting against yourself IS playing life on torture mode AND entirely OPTIONAL. Most solutions for overcoming perfectionism suck. They're not empowering, efficient or any FUN, plus research shows Overcoming Perfectionism simply *doesn’t work*when you are driven, ambitious, caring, high-performer. That’s WHY I’m revealing how you can take your frustrating perfectionistic tendencies—like catastrophizing, people-pleasing and overthinking— and remix them with refreshingly practical perspectives from our neurodiversity neighbor, ADHD. 

Want to feel as incredible on the inside as your life looks on the outside? Then you gotta check out Perfectionism Optimized, the only 1-1 private coa...

Feel like Perfectionism is controlling you? That you’re at the mercy of your perfectionist tendencies? Or that life would be easier if you weren’t such a perfectionist? Perfectionism is not a choice. But you can choose how you want to navigate through it, and that choice is powerful. Discover how the greats Dolly Parton, Serena Williams, Kobe Bryant, Sara Blakely, Marie Kondo have leveraged their perfectionism to shine. Through scientific research and personal experiences, you'll discover step-by-step how it's possible to rewire your perfectionistic habits from the inside out, just like CLG did.

Rewire the righ...

Got resentment? Uncover where resentment is hiding in your home responsibilities and the No. 1 mistake you're probably making when it comes to communicating your frustration (this takes you out of black and white thinking).  Plus the ONE TOOL that makes you 90% less resentful towards your partner + makes 100% sense as to why you feel like it's all on your shoulders. This TOOL is like having the power to show upcoming storms in your relationship, dissolve them ahead of time and avoid saying mean things you feel guilty about later  – for  both you + partner! 
 

Upgrade from resentment to reconne...

Building Resilience IRL Intimate, all access behind-the-scenes look of how I get my anxious, overthinking Type-A high performance perfectionistic brain to calm TF down *when Anxiety strikes*. Previously only available on the Private Client Podcast, sharing with you in celebration of my birthday AND to show you there IS a MUCH better way to deal with your perfectionism. Where you're in charge, confident and connected to YOUR values. If you want to get out of your own way and be more present, this is the episode for you! 

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time...