Cast Iron Brains - A Podcast with Bob and Abe
The home of the only officially licensed podcast of the Brain Iron multinational media empire.
Bike Headlamp Thief Apologists (CIB #274)
Something the Trump administration did was good, we must reluctantly admit. It’s another week of travel stories and meandering through the headlines looking for something interesting to say. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — ICE at the airport
17:53 — Abe, crime victim
26:56 — Is the phone call making a comeback?
31:25 — WGAS NewsBag; Air Canada CEO forced out; Tiger Woods car...
I Spent A Week in Northern Europe and All I Got Was A Lot of Complaining About Airlines (CIB #273)
Lori has made her glorious return from Finland and Estonia and has a lot to say about why flying is bullshit. We also barely contain our glee while discussing a murder, chat about Iran, and play America’s Favorite Game Show, Chuck Norris Edition. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Being insensitive about airport chaos
8:42 — Lori in the World
49...
Dubious Solutions (CIB #272)
With Lori on a whole-ass other continent, we’re left sad and lonely and drifting through the news of the week, with much talk of American decline, our lack of faith on one another, and whether or not we are a people capable of building the sort of world we hope to live in. It’s quite a hoot! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show...
Make America Great World Police Again (CIB #271)
A little less than a week ago, the United States and Israel began a war with Iran. Today, we talk about it. See that?! A masterful sales job! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe runs, huffs, puffs
4:27 — United States at war in Iran
1:01:27 — Did CBS News’ Senior National Correspondent Mark Strassmann Get Off A Good One?
1:09:37 — Wrap-up! T...
Really Good at the Really Bad Thing (CIB #270)
The State of the Union might as well have been a month ago, but we’re here to talk about it as the glorious, hilarious, highly watchable, weird, shameful, exploitative circus gameshow that it undeniably was. That and the latest goings on over on the CBS Evening News, Abe’s movie reviews, and plenty of YOUTH SPORT DRAMA. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show...
White Men Can't Soap (CIB #269)
Today we’re mostly ignoring the news of the week to instead express wonder and dismay at how short form video is probably breaking our brains in really bad ways. It’s a hoot! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — The Biffler goes full blood-determinism
21:33 — Regressing to an oral culture
36:03 — Maybe weight does in fact correlate with health a bit
5...
Le Hibou Superbe LX: Le Lapin Coquin vs L'Enfant Rock (CIB #268)
It’s an almost-all Super Bowl 60 reaction spectacular! We watched, we complained, we talked about it. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe girds himself for SURVIVOR 50
3:11 — Trump stumbles over non-existent bar for his own speech, posts Obamas depicted as apes
12:28 — Super Bowl 60! And the Olympics!
48:07 — Super Bowl 60 commercials!
1:04:38 — Super Bowl 60 halftime shows!
1:41:16 — Canada to lose all hockey p...
We Are All Mike D's Cat (CIB #267)
Rather than another lengthy run through the unpleasant headlines of the week, we are here with a more ruminative discussion about whether the relationships that have been strained by The Trumppening have a chance of being mended when it finally comes to an end. We also talk about a social network for AIs, and what it means to engage with purely arbitrary content created with no intention beyond pattern matching. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our S...
Oops! They Did it Again (CIB #266)
CIB has tunneled through enough ice and snow to record another spectacular episode of the only podcast, and within you will find our discussion of the killing of Alex Pretti by CBP officers and also a couple of football games, because America! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Lots of weather happened!
22:36 — Alex Pretti killed by CBP in Minnesota
1...
Human as a Second Language (CIB #265)
College football and NATO are basically the same, and Donald Trump and Fernando Mendoza are basically the same. That’s your summary! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe in the World, podcasting finally getting the recognition it deserves
7:32 — Trump in Davos
1:09:10 — Cast Iron Balls! NFL games recap
1:20:19 — Indiana beats Miami
1:54:41 — Wrap-up!
Relevant Linkage can be found...
All of Us Witnesses Found Wanting (CIB #264)
This week we’re here to discuss the shooting of Renee Good by an ICE officer last week, because you can never have too much of that, apparently. And on the way out, reviews of Greenland 2 and a quick game of FMK, HP6 Edition. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — …as it all falls apart.
8:45 — Minnesota ICE shooting
54:43 — Trump’s NYT i...
Report: Hoosiers Drink Megatron's Butthole Dry (Cast Iron Balls #69)
It was a long weekend of spectacular playoff football action, and we’re here to yap about it all and ask important questions, like “hey maybe Justin Herbert is a dummy.” Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live-Bets the Games!
7:39 — College Football Playoff semifinals recap
33:41 — NFL Wildcard Weekend
52:23 — 2025 CIB Football Pick ‘em Contest
53:39 — Wrap-up!
Relevant Linkage c...
That Time Donald Trump Dark-Knighted a President (CIB #263)
Something really weird happened on late Saturday night, and we’re here to try to talk our way through it. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Too old and misshapen for the slopes, and a brief run-in with a Buc-ee’s
10:00 — NYE TV Chucklefuckery
16:55 — Venezuela’s President Maduro Dark Knight-ed to the US
1:18:40 — Wrap-up! We Bury the Dead; Oblivion...
Grunter Stockman, Bulldog Hero (Cast Iron Balls #68)
Cast Iron Balls is finally here nearly a week later to recap the CFP quarterfinals and look ahead to the semis. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe among the fellow hairless
5:50 — Recapping the CFP quarterfinals
41:41 — 2025 CIB Football Pick ‘em Game
1:02:10 — Wrap-up!
Relevant Linkage can be found by visiting https://brainiron.substack.com/, where, if you would lik...
So Long 2025 Too-Long Spectacular! (CIB #262)
Following the lead of our sibling podcast—the much-awarded and world-renowned The Biffler—Cast Iron Brains has decided to do a year-end wrap-up show with absolute disregard for the time and patience of our audience. Instead of breaking things up into manageable episodes you might actually want to listen to, here’s an episode about the upcoming college football playoff games, the news of the year, our new year’s resolutions, and Mario Kart World Tour. Enjoy? Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by jo...
Communing with Idiot Space Whales, Again (CIB #261)
This week we’re yapping about Bari Weiss spiking a 60 Minutes story at the last second, how Reddit didn’t actually help with the manhunt for an accused mass shooter, recapping the first round of the college football playoffs, and reviewing Avatar 3. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — This episode brought to you by our sponsor, and getting ready for Christ...
Have Some Self-Respect and Self-Possession, and Other Losing Arguments (Cast Iron Balls #67)
The first round of the College Football Playoff is right around the corner, and we’re here to talk about a whole bunch of other vaguely sports-related stuff before getting into the games previews. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live-Bets the Games!
5:52 — WGAS NewsBag, Sports Edition! Sherrone Moore; Michigan coaching search; QBs in the portal; Heisman to the he...
Cold Showers, Gingerbread, and Unserious People (CIB #260)
Well, that was a quite unpleasant weekend, from a national and international news perspective. So let’s talk all about it, I guess! But only after a detailed rundown of our gingerbread house-making process first, of course, because we must focus on what matters. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — A splash of cold water!
6:57 — Gingerbread house construction recap!
30:15...
Podcast Hosts Mark 15,000th Spin on News Ride (CIB #259)
The flagship podcast of the Brain Iron Multinational Media Empire is back and doing what we do best—wondering why exactly we bother doing this at all! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Revving back up after a brief hiatus
2:28 — How the second Trump administration is just like the CFP Committee
17:51 — The drug war is still a bad idea, ev...
Winning Conference Titles Rules, Actually (Cast Iron Balls #66)
College football’s conference championship weekend was an absolute blast, and CIB is here to yap about it. That and chatter about the College Football Playoff field, how Alabama could have fallen out, how Notre Dame could have been kept in, and plenty else! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
11:17 — Championship Weekend Games Recap!
1:3...
Chucklefucks Run Amok (Cast Iron Balls #65)
It’s a Conference Championship weekend preview episode, and the relative lack of national action gives us the opportunity to discuss cold remedies, BIG MOON, and youth sport-themed gingerbread displays. And then we’ve got the usual rundown of sports headlines, games previews, and silliness from Jimmy Carter and all the rest. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the...
Trying to Find the Lance Who Did This (Cast Iron Balls #64)
We have made it through Thanksgiving largely intact and are excited to talk about all the football we watched, and all the ways Lance Kiffin revealed himself to be just the absolute worst sort of person. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Thanksgiving recap!
8:15 — Football happened! We chat about it!
17:01 — EMERGENCY!
18:51 — Back to the recaps!
53:48 — Lance Kiffin leaves...
Sharing Our Cast Iron Balls with Visiting Family (Cast Iron Balls #63)
It’s somehow a week 13 recap and a week 14 preview episode all rolled into one, but still considerably shorter than a regular episode—must be that holiday magic! Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Special Guests! And Abe Live Bets the Games!
7:04 — Week 13 Recap!
25:31 — The Best Game in Every Time Slot
37:17 — CIB 2025 Football Pick ‘em Contest
42:16 — Jimmy Carter’s Pres...
A Sickos Quadbox Kinda Weekend (Cast Iron Balls #62)
The games may not be all that good this weekend, but that’s not going to stop us from yapping about them, along with the sports news of the week and our regular visit from former president Jimmy Carter with the Presidential Lock of the Week. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
4:45 — WGAS Newsbag, Sports Ed...
"Hi, my name is Steve Sarkisian, and it has been three days since my last ass-kicking." CIBalls #61
Georgia welcomed the Texas Longhorns to Athens for the first time ever this weekend, and it did not go well for the visitors. We discuss a great performance by the Dawgs, Alabama falling to visiting Oklahoma, and what it all means for the College Football Playoff. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
4:00 — WGAS NewsBag, Spor...
Why is the Toyotathon Lady? (Cast Iron Balls #60)
Week 12 of the college football season is upon us, and with it comes plenty of talk about credit card rewards and car commercials, obviously. That and our usual assortment of games previews and celestially-sourced gambling guarantees—for entertainment purposes only, of course. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games! And a digression about credit cards?
11:36 — Bitchi...
How to Become a Youth Soccer Coach (Cast Iron Balls #59)
Week 11 of the college football season was pretty fun, and we’re here to talk about it! Also, the Falcons and Colts were in Berlin and YOUTH SOCCER hooligans got Bob all hot and bothered about sportsmanship. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games, and Colts/Falcons
15:15 — WGAS Newsbag, Sports Edition! Daboll fired; more player gambling...
Defending All Our Positions, Except the Ones We Don't (Cast Iron Balls #58)
Week 11 might be looking a little less than wholly captivating on paper, but that doesn’t stop your favorite sports podcast from having a grand old time yapping about it, along with all the other news and silliness of the week. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games, and Bob offers a pro-tip to The Biffler
8:38...
Fall Ball, of Many Varieties, is the Best Ball (Cast Iron Balls #57)
You might think that after a sports weekend that included a World Series going the distance, the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party coming down to the final moments, and plenty of other thrilling college and pro football action, we would not be leading off our show with thirty minutes devoted to YOUTH SPORT. But you would be very wrong to think that. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an em...
Riding Yoshi (the Horse) to Parlay Glory (Cast Iron Balls #56)
It’s a birthday and Halloween edition of your favorite sports-but-mostly-college-football podcast, with a special guest and our regular assortment of games previews and silliness. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
4:37 — WGAS NewsBag, Sports Edition: Brian Kelly Fired! World Series is good!
39:14 — The Best Game in Every Time Slot
56:10 — 2025 CIB Football Pick ‘em Contest
1...
Maybe All this Gambling is Bad, Actually (Cast Iron Balls #55)
It’s a Week 9 college football preview episode, but first we have to talk about the big sports news of the day—the Trump Justice Department bringing charges against NBA stars for their involvement in illegal poker games and gambling on sports. All that and our usual assortment of silliness and pitterpatter, and, of course, a visit from Jimmy in Heaven for the Presidential Lock of the Week. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you...
Watching 20-Year-Olds Do Dumb Things for Fun (Cast Iron Balls #54)
Week 8 of the 2025 college football season is complete, and it was quite possibly the most fun bunch of games we’ve seen this year. We talk about a whole heap of them, including extended yapping about the Georgia/Ole Miss contest, which was both awesome and utterly mystifying. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
9:03 — Georgia v...
The Herschel Walker Urinals at Peabody Hall (Cast Iron Balls #53)
It’s a week eight college football preview show! What more do you need to know? We’ve got Jimmy’s Presidential Lock of the Week, The Best Game in Every Time Slot, and plenty of other enjoyable yapping about sports. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
5:15 — WGAS NewsBag, Sports Edition! Saudi Arabia and private equit...
Immiserating Our Kids, One Way or Another (CIB #258)
With children’s birthdays rapidly approaching, Cast Iron Brains is here to discuss when, if ever, is the right time to put always-on communication devices on their wrists or in their pockets. Are we standing athwart the inevitable, or is there a better way to be in the world that one can achieve without incurring too much personal cost and misery? That and plenty of yapping about the news of the week, and a hope that Mark Strassmann is able to return to peak form. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FE...
The Universal Signal for Illegal Clapping (Cast Iron Balls #52)
Predictably enough, the Georgia/Auburn game dominates our sports weekend recap today, with much yelling and argument over the inner thoughts and intentions of a man attempting to communicate one simple thing and completely blowing it. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
4:00 — Georgia vs Auburn reactions
41:42 — The rest of the games, and James Frankl...
We Don't Care for Auburn or French Fire Perverts (Cast Iron Balls #51)
Just in time, it’s a Week 7 College Football Preview Episode! Plenty of yapping about the other sports news of the week, the Best Game in Every Time Slot, and a bonus INSTANT LIVE REACTION to Philly misery at the very end. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games! Trevor Lawrence falls over twice!
6:31 — WGAS NewsBa...
Can the Hot AI Robits Be a Bit More Beguilingly Sad? (CIB #257)
We plow through the news that caught our attention this week and wonder about a future that promises to feed our eyeballs with images and information that we know cannot be relied upon to contain any truth value. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Not RUSHing to our local arena
3:20 — Abe explains the shutdown
5:07 — WGAS NewsBag; Baseless speculation about...
"Cranky bitches losing just makes me so happy." (Cast Iron Balls #50)
Week six of the college football schedule ended up wildly entertaining, especially if you are entertained by teams that are supposed to be very good getting their butts kicked by teams that are not supposed to be very good. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
3:33 — Mark Sanchez has a bad weekend, to our amusement
1...
Abe's Arms are Tired (CIB #256)
It’s a fun-size episode of CIB this week because we are admittedly losing the steam to talk about everything going on in the world at the moment. But tune in for Abe’s European travelogue and our discombobulated dissatisfaction with the state of our so-called politics, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe in the World
20:49 — While Abe was away…
44...
Great Games and Less than Ideal Results (Cast Iron Balls #49)
Cast Iron Balls is here with a firsthand account of the Virginia/FSU overtime thriller in Charlottesville last Friday, and plenty of TAKES about the state of the Georgia football program. And since it’s already nearly the weekend, we’re also doing our Week 6 preview. Listen, if you must! Has something we said, or failed to say, made you FEEL something? You can tell us all about it by joining the conversation on our Substack or you can send us an email here. Enjoy!
Show Rundown
Open — Abe Live Bets the Games!
4:33 — Virginia storms the field a...
