Off The Hook With Gage

PRECISION slapdashery in all its manifold manifestations awaits you on Today's OFF THE HOOK! * Who else works so hard to get it so wrong? * But, you know, wrong in the right way! * It's not like folding a nickel, IT'S MAGIC without the trick! * This preternatural flex has the world's cynics scratching their jaws! * But you can weigh in on the way-out percolations of OFF THE HOOK, a MUSIC PROGRAM, yourself at KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/

The ALACRITY with which your Humble Host accepts his weekly mission is not just alarming, it's DISARMING! * And his fervor is OVERSTUFFED with zeal on today's OFF THE HOOK! * Why?  Why this show today? * Because as May has marched into June, your SPUNKY spelunker has emerged from the cold depths bearing warm UNDULATING waves of sound heretofore unheard! * Uncover the GEMS he has in store today on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ 'Tain't no fool's gold, neither! 

GOOD NEWS for listeners with an ITCH for non-toxic, mostly new music radio programming! * Every OFF THE HOOK show is made from SCRATCH using All-Natural ingredients mixed with 100% SUPERNATURAL flair! * Say goodbye forever to scaly radio with the SOOTHING musical balm specially prepared for you by your crusty-yet-unctuous (but never scrofulous) host, GAGE KENADY! * Don't flake out, tune in to OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/ ! * Your stereocilia will thank you!

ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTE! * There are a lot of impersonators out there, but for the real ROOTIN'-TOOTIN' kick-up-your-heels-and-fall-on-your-ass kind of fun that OFF THE HOOK provides, tune into KXSF 102.5 FM https://kxsf.fm/ ! * There is no comparison! * What other show lets you LAUGH at the hapless flailings of a bewildered gent bent on making the most of three hours of unbridled uniquity? * NO OTHER! * Look for the show with its hat slung low and its top ready to blow!

As the Myth of Knowledge comes clattering down your back alleyway to remind you that there ain't NO ONE WRONG WAY to consume your weekly portion of OFF THE HOOK, it encounters the Grift of Experience who chortles and snorts "Ha! We are but FREE-FLOATING JELLY! Your shopworn counsel is a prune to my aspidistra!" * Dejected, but hungry, Mythy covers its wrist and returns to unset its clocks for KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/  It worked!

FREE GAS! * No matter whether you're already tanked up or running on fumes, each week OFF THE HOOK brings the fuel to keep you MOTORVATING through your Friday! * Too cool to pedal push?  Why not go electric with the souped-up programming OFF THE HOOK provides at NO CHARGE? * It's top down time on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ Get gassed!

STRIKING! * That's what OFF THE HOOK is, programming-wise! * All Phat Tracks and NO FAT CATS! * (KXSF jocks don't get paid a dime) * Hit 'em in the wallet -> Working: NAY! * Shopping: NAY! * School: NAY! * RADIO: OK! * Our WORKERS volunteer their time to serve you today and every day! * May you tune in to OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ ? * Yes, you MAY!

Down the chute and into your lap, another OFF THE HOOK is born! * It's got FLAIR, it's got CHARM and it looks just like its father! * Let this rascally little cutie's BURBLING COO totally win your heart and you'll see that all of my week's labor was worth it! * If you fail to fall for this baby, you're simply a monster, that's all! * A proud showing every week on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/

Ever wonder what the inside of a vacuum cleaner sounds like? * Every week OFF THE HOOK SUCKS up musical debris from across the internet, applies its SPECIAL FILTER, and delivers to you PRISTINE beauties that your ear will appreciate! * Tired of SUCKY radio? * Then SUCK up to the CONSCIENTIOUS HOOVERINGS of OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/

Unofficial, Unauthorized, ROGUE. * Do you really want your OFF THE HOOK authorized and officiated? * Isn't OFF THE HOOK the last bastion of WILD AND FREE non-corporate radio? * Why, you'd no sooner put OFF THE HOOK on watch than you would your child in manacles! * The chaos of the world is refracted into BEAUTIOUS  Inspiration through the CRACKED crystal of OFF THE HOOK! * It's a prism for the un-imprisoned! * So, break free and let the bonds of conformity SNAP!  https://kxsf.fm/

Every Friday is a GOOD FRIDAY on OFF THE HOOK! * That's because of the SACRIFICE that goes into the making of each and every show! * OFF THE HOOK sacrifices sleep, good health practices, social obligations and financial stability in order to NAIL DOWN the best possible program for you every week! * Each one is loaded with EASTER EGGS and your Faith in radio is always RESURRECTED when you tune in! * So, hop like a BUNNY to KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/ !

Well, I've cleaned off all of the cat hair and all of the BEARD HAIR, so OFF THE HOOK will be recognizable once again! * My CACHE OF COOL tunes is replenished and so am I! * Be prepared for a relaxed new face with the same old frantic voice you've come to accept! * We're back in business and business is pleasure on OFF THE HOOK, baby! * Live corn pops on OFF THE HOOK! * KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/

What does FRIDAY THE 13TH have in common with any other Friday on KXSF? * It's your LUCKY DAY! * If it comforts you to have a RABBIT'S FOOT in your pocket, fine. * But, OFF THE HOOK wards off all BAD JUJU every damn week! * You'll be CHARMED by our MAGIC and our groovy MOJO will keep you from FOMO, MOFO! * Our three-hour SPELL is heard on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ !

Lousy with SPARKLE, rank with splendor, OFF THE HOOK turns heads * Inside-out. * Still the pre-doom OFF THE HOOK you've always loved, OFF THE HOOK startles with nonchalant urgency! * Dotted with tease, crossed with eyes, OFF THE HOOK falls into your lap on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/, baby!

YOU'RE CURIOUS.  I like that about you. * You need to know about the LATEST in SOUNDS. * Luckily, OFF THE HOOK, The Show That Shows, is here to help you out! * A three-hour journey of discovery, OFF THE HOOK satisfies your need to STAY ON TOP of things! * Your friends may describe you as "curious" for having musical FOMO, but just look at those boring antiquities living in the past. * You need new friends. * OFF THE HOOK is your new friend and you're not a cat, so scratch that itch with Off The Hook on KXSF-LP 102.5 FM, it won't kill yo...

Just as hosting a radio program in a FROSTY studio is akin to feats of endurance in the Winter Olympics, we know that listeners need a proper blankie in order to fully appreciate the amazing SPECTACLE that is OFF THE HOOK! * OFF THE HOOK blankets you with a coziness that WARMS FROM WITHIN! * It's like a STEAMING cocoa-coffee and a hot toddy rolled into one! * And then there's the RADIANT WARMTH blasting from your chattering host! * Or, you may get HOT under the collar at the agitating sounds heard on OFF THE HOOK! * Either way, you'll leave less frozen...

Are you a SUPERSTITIOUS VALENTINE? * Well, OFF THE HOOK, for one, is not! * No CANDY HEARTS brought to you by a BLACK CAT today! * The Show That Shows has business to attend to and will not let CUPID'S ARROW turn it into a wobbly, drunk-with-desire, BESOTTED blob! * Our infatuation is with presenting a LOVELY program of Brilliant New Sounds! * And ladders?  We walk right under them! * Cracks?  We step right on them! * So, no themes, but you will have great LUCK and will FALL IN LOVE with OFF THE HOOK when you tune in:  https://kxsf.fm/

Save the head-butting for Sunday! * OFF THE HOOK doesn't need to compete -whether you're a bunny or a rock, OFF THE HOOK hands off something to everyone! * Its GOAL is to clinch your hearts with new audibles that will make you SNAP! * Our non-confrontational half-time event (called The Birthday Segment) will be a bonanza for oldies fans! * There's only one team, so join OFF THE HOOK, in association with KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ for a BLITZ where everyone scores!

OFF THE HOOK WANTS YOU! * Curious listeners sought for a ROUSING program of auditory self-improvement! * Feeling draggy from listening to mediocre radio? * OFF THE HOOK sharpens the senses and brings a PROFOUND sense of well-being! * Its varied selection ensures your rapt attention and puts pep in your step! * Enrollment on a walk-in basis between KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/  No one turned away!

It's sure to pick you up! * Sit back and let Uncle Gagie fix you up with the GOOD STUFF! * Mainline the latest from his weekly HIT Parade and settle into a SERENE SWOON that'll have you nodding in appreciation! * "Where do I get this Direct Injection of ADDICTIVE Fun?", you ask. * On KXSF 102.5FM or https://kxsf.fm/ * First one's free -they all are! * You won't be OFF THE HOOK much longer!

KICKIN' BACK IN THE CUBICLE! * You've got better things to do! * Point out to old man Bossman that the PLEASING AND STIMULATING sounds of OFF THE HOOK make for a warmer, more focused workplace! * It's a bunch of hooey, of course  -or is it? * Cram a bunch of co-workers in there for a "SPECIAL PROJECT" and see if the mood of GOOD WILL and camaraderie isn't heightened! * No work will get done, but you'll have a GLORIOUS last day and a BRIGHT FUTURE centering your life around OFF THE HOOK on the couches you'll be flopping on! * Your future s...

YOU'RE INVITED! * Kenady lets you listen in on his MASTERFUL culture-culling for the purpose of building his own personal library of GREAT NEW SONGS he doesn't already have! * Music for people with time on their hands! * It's called OFF THE HOOK, The Show That Shows and it starts at 1:00 on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ ! * Take advantage (?) of his industrious hobby!

There's nothing TERRIBLY STRANGE about playing CHRISTMAS MUSIC a week before Christmas, but the Christmas music you'll hear on Today's OFF THE HOOK might be! * New, unfamiliar Carols will give a FACELIFT to the saggy puss of Christmas Past and your jowls will snap to attention when we STUFF YOUR STOCKINGS with a sleighful of the Brightest Stars in the Birthday Segment! * All in all, it's gonna make Christmas itself look puny and pathetic! * Join the party on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ Our gift to you!

ARE YOU READY FOR IT? * You'd better be, because TWENTY TWENTY-SICK is here! * What it will bring no one knows, but the signposts may be heard on Today's OFF THE HOOK, which will include 2025's TOP TRACKS! * We will also hear tracks from albums not yet gotten to and not-yet-gotten-to tracks from albums gotten to, too! * Believe it or not, musicians are people, which means they have BIRTHDAYs, which will be celebrated in a special SEGMENT! * All in all, it's business as usual on this FIRST OFF THE HOOK of 2026! * Join us at 1:00 on KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/ ! * O...

'TIS THE SEASON to kick the eff back for three hours! * You be settin' up yer tree -OFF THE HOOK is the perfect soundtrack! * No Holiday Sounds yet, but the JOVIAL MOOD you'll be put in as you SLURP your eggnog will have you LURCHING from limb to limb, hanging ornaments in HAPHAZARD fashion as you REEL AND BUMP your way to Flappy's Den! * You've been shoppin' and plannin' so doggone hard -give yourself a break! *Tune in to OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/

GOOD FOR WHAT ALIS YOU! * Your overconsumption of merriment yesterday is exacting its toll today. * OFF THE HOOK is here to help! * The EASY BREEZY sounds heard on today's show will soothe the savage turkey breast that your poor beaten body is still struggling to digest! * And nothing's more DIGESTIBLE than OFF THE HOOK's Mellow Menu of Melodious Morsels! * Find relief on OFF THE HOOK and wash it down with humble pie!

The Show That Shows (OFF THE HOOK) has a few TRICKS up its sleeve! * Its SLEIGHT OF HAND is so deft that even WIZARDS cannot detect how it can conjure the ILLUSION of a top-shelf, professional operation! * With a wave of its hand, this slap-dash collection of unlikely sounds, hosted by an inane MC, appears to be a finely crafted, well-thought-out presentation of scholarly experience! * The MAGIC that ensues perplexes the senses and boggles the rational mind! * ABRACADABRA, PRESTO CHANGO, it's OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ Let the hypnosis work for you!

Is it SEX you're after? * OFF THE HOOK has a very good record of matchmaking, bringing together saucy trombones and feisty castanets and other unlikely couplings! * Like to DANCE? * No one has ever prevented anyone from dancing to OFF THE HOOK! -we suggest the Crawl, except that's a swimming stroke, not a dance. * Is OFF THE HOOK all things to all people? * No.* I guess we can't be sure what OFF THE HOOK really is until we listen.   https://kxsf.fm/ So let's all listen and be one.

Regardless of how it may sound to you, your host is not easily satisfied! * The music must be INTERESTING, and/or BEAUTIFUL, and FRESH! * He is willing to sacrifice a bit of professionalism in his presentation, but the music must never fall short! * If it seems to, you are clearly a newcomer who has not yet been indoctrinated into the WHIMSICAL ways of OFF THE HOOK! * Please tune in to the Idiosyncratic Aberration that is OFF THE HOOK at 1:00 on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/ and we'll reverberate together.

IF YOU'RE WEARING PANTS, you might as well take them off now, because Today's HALLOWEEN edition of OFF THE HOOK will scare them right off of you! * GHOSTS & GOBLINS, WITCHES & DEVILS, SPIDERS & BATS and DEATH DEATH DEATH will animate today's most unholy program! * Spells at https://kxsf.fm/ Maybe bring a diaper.

Like the Umbrella Mouth Gulper Eel, OFF THE HOOK goes deep! * Wriggling its way to the depths to scoop up GLITTERING GEMS in its mighty maw, the OFF THE HOOK Gulper surfaces with its once-submerged spoils in a RESPLENDENT display of Sub-aquatic Sounds! * But it's no bottom feeder! * Its appetite is for the Freshly Spawned -the gulped guppies that are winnowed from the minnows in the Great Aquarium of musical meals! * GO DEEP with OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/  No snorkel necessary!

It's funny and squishy and full of goodness! * LISTEN TO OFF THE HOOK! * It's right Up Your Street! * By its reputation, you'd think it's a Music Show, but nominally it's about a hook! * WHAT IS IT? * OFF THE HOOK, The Show That Shows, hooks you! * The guy on it is worth a dime, at least! * Cruise on into the GOOD TIMES on OFF THE HOOK -you'll laugh a lot!  https://kxsf.fm/  Take part.

BEAUTY FOR THE FEW! * Even though OFF THE HOOK's listenership is not that great, each individual listener IS great! * That's why the Herculean effort taken to produce each OFF THE HOOK program is WORTH IT! * Scouring the interwebs for new and NOVEL sounds is exhausting and often dirty work, but Off The Hookers expect the UNEXPECTED and deserve the IDIOSYNCRATIC voice that speaks to and for them! * OFF THE HOOK takes no days off to bring you the Last Word in New Music, because there IS no last word -it never stops coming! *     https://kxsf.fm/

OFF THE HOOK carries on: no shutdown, no cancellation, no sweeping changes! * Just The Life of a Showboy (me) at 1:00 on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/  Business as usual!

"What's up with that guy?  He's always shoving WILLFULLY OBSCURE music down our throats." * "His oldies-Birthday segment is good and he gives away good tickets to shows, but the NEW MUSIC he plays -where does he get it?  Nobody's heard of it before." * "And he's a little out of control, like he doesn't know what he's doing." * "Kind of amateurish. It's a little exhausting." * "Most of the BEST MUSIC I never heard before I heard on OFF THE HOOK" * Take the bad with the good on KXSF 102.5FM  https://kxsf.fm/ Keeping you on edge.

Sure, you might have better things to do, but can you still do them? * As your freedoms erode, it's nice to know that OFF THE HOOK is still, for the time being, here. * It's impossible at this point to know what innocently careless thing your host might say or post that could get OFF THE HOOK shit-canned (dictators are capricious like that!). * It's not like KXSF has some big corporate merger pending (I hope!) * But you come to OFF THE HOOK to escape such unsavory (nay, soul-crushing) thoughts! * OFF THE HOOK on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/  It's like w...

SUPER FESTIVE STUFF happens on this week's continuation of the SUPER CELEBRATORY celebration of KXSF's 7th Anniversary of being on the airwaves! * (Mostly, I'm thinking, music.) * OFF THE HOOK BRINGS IT: the latest crop of NEW SOUNDS -and a smattering of old!! * Whether KXSF 102.5FM or https://kxsf.fm/, It's three hours of RECKLESS WONDER!

SUPER FESTIVE STUFF happens on this week's continuation of the SUPER CELEBRATORY celebration of KXSF's 7th Anniversary of being on the airwaves! * (Mostly, I'm thinking, music.) * OFF THE HOOK BRINGS IT: the latest crop of NEW SOUNDS -and a smattering of old!! * Whether KXSF 102.5FM or https://kxsf.fm/, It's three hours of RECKLESS WONDER!

When is OFF THE HOOK not off the hook? * When it has the responsibility of getting you to listen to this damn show! * Toward that end, may I entice OLDIES lovers with an extended, massive, Virgo-engorged Birthday Segment? * Plus, I could promise to refrain from begging you for station donations (haha / *wink* -you know it's fundraising week)! * Whatever it was, your excuse for not listening has just withered away -you're ON the hook to listen to OFF THE HOOK: on KXSF 102.5FM https://kxsf.fm/