The Attracting Lasting Love Podcast
The Attracting Lasting Love Podcast is hosted by Roy Biancalana, a certified relationship coach, three-time #1 best-selling author and nationally-recognized expert in the field of attraction and conscious relationships. His podcast is devoted to supporting single people in their desire to attract a healthy, sustainable, intimate relationship. The perspective shared is a mindful or conscious perspective on life, love and the pursuit of intimacy. Roy does not focus much on telling single people where to go, how to approach or what to say to a potential partner. Rather, he focuses on helping people identify and let go of the barriers, blockages...
271 Allowing Life to Be Your Matchmaker: An Interview with Beth and Waven
In this episode, Roy does something very unusual–he interviews guests! It's crazy but true. And if you're thinking that these guests must be special if Roy is having them on the show, you'd be right.
For many, the pursuit of intimacy–especially if you're doing online dating—is a frustrating and discouraging process. So, if you could use a little pick-me-up, a little inspiration, a little reminder that it's possible for two people to meet, date, and commit to one another in today's day and age, then hearing Beth & Waven's story is just what the doc...
270 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health, Pt. 7: The Commitment to Ask for Help
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In the final episode of this series, we learn that asking for help is not a sign of weak...
269 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health, Pt. 6: The Commitment to Find "The Middle Way"
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In part six of the series, we learn that the "crazy train" is always headed to "destination: extreme." But...
268 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health, Pt. 5: The Commitment to Seek Truth
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In part five of the series, we are surprised to learn that seeking truth is a key pillar of m...
267 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health, Pt. 4: The Commitment to Handle Life's Challenges
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In part four of the series, we face an obvious truth: challenges will come. They come to all of u...
266 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health Pt. 3: The Commitment to Manage Your Inner Space
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In part three of the series, we're challenged to manage our inner space. Just as you wouldn't let some...
265 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health, Pt. 2: The Commitment to Understand the Nature of Mind
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In part two of the series, we begin to unpack Michael Singer's perplexing statement: "All problems are caused by m...
264 Living Above the Fray: The 7 Pillars of Mental Health, Pt. 1: The Commitment to Choose a Conscious Path
In 1980, Ozzy Osbourne sang about "…going off the rails on a crazy train." We all know what he was talking about, don't we? Certainly, the world around us often feels crazy, but sometimes we struggle with mental health issues, too.
In this important 7-part series, Roy Biancalana, our host, talks about "The 7 Pillars of Mental Health," and how they can allow us to "live above the fray," and stay off the "crazy train."
In this first episode of the series, we learn that the first pillar of mental health is to hone...
263 What You Should Be Looking for in a Life Partner, Pt. 5—Look for Synergy NOT Similarity
The amount of information on how to find a life partner is staggering. There are videos, podcasts, blogs, books—who doesn't have a theory? While some of the information is good, the sheer volume makes it overwhelming. How in the world are we to make sense of it?
Well, in an effort to sift through all the noise, Roy Biancalana, our host, has boiled down our pursuit of intimacy to 5 essential ideas, and they are the focus of this 5-part series.
In final installment of the series, we face an important ques...
262 What You Should Be Looking for in a Life Partner, Pt. 4—Look for Claimers NOT Blamers
The amount of information on how to find a life partner is staggering. There are videos, podcasts, blogs, books—who doesn't have a theory? While some of the information is good, the sheer volume makes it overwhelming. How in the world are we to make sense of it?
Well, in an effort to sift through all the noise, Roy Biancalana, our host, has boiled down our pursuit of intimacy to 5 essential ideas, and they are the focus of this 5-part series.
In part four of the series, the focus is on how...
261 What You Should Be Looking for in a Life Partner, Pt. 3— Look for Like NOT Love
The amount of information on how to find a life partner is staggering. There are videos, podcasts, blogs, books—who doesn't have a theory? While some of the information is good, the sheer volume makes it overwhelming. How in the world are we to make sense of it?
Well, in an effort to sift through all the noise, Roy Biancalana, our host, has boiled down our pursuit of intimacy to 5 essential ideas, and they are the focus of this 5-part series.
In part three of the series, you'll hear something radical. We s...
260 What You Should Be Looking for in a Life Partner, Pt. 2— Look for Barriers NOT Boys (or Babes)
The amount of information on how to find a life partner is staggering. There are videos, podcasts, blogs, books—who doesn't have a theory? While some of the information is good, the sheer volume makes it overwhelming. How in the world are we to make sense of it?
Well, in an effort to sift through all the noise, Roy Biancalana, our host, has boiled down our pursuit of intimacy to 5 essential ideas, and they are the focus of this 5-part series.
In part two of the series, we're encouraged to look not...
259 What You Should Be Looking for in a Life Partner, Pt. 1—Look for Shared Commitments NOT Shared Chemistry
The amount of information on how to find a life partner is staggering. There are videos, podcasts, blogs, books—who doesn't have a theory? While some of the information is good, the sheer volume makes it overwhelming. How in the world are we to make sense of it?
Well, in an effort to sift through all the noise, Roy Biancalana, our host, has boiled down our pursuit of intimacy to 5 essential ideas, and they are the focus of this 5-part series.
In part one of the series, the focus is on what...
258 The 5-Fold Path to Happiness & Freedom, Pt. 6—Don't Self
Happiness and freedom are what we ultimately want, but what path should we follow to get there? Should we pursue meaningful relationships, lasting intimacy, financial security, purpose and meaning, health, family, fame or religion? Or is it something else entirely?
Well, in this series of podcasts, Roy describes the BEST path to happiness and freedom. It is spiritual in nature, and it's about shifting from self-ing to be-ing.
In this episode, you will learn:
· Why you are suffering from a severe case of mistaken identity;
· Why your self is causin...
257 The 5-Fold Path to Happiness & Freedom, Pt. 5—Don't Know
Happiness and freedom are what we ultimately want, but what path should we follow to get there? Should we pursue meaningful relationships, lasting intimacy, financial security, purpose and meaning, health, family, fame or religion? Or is it something else entirely?
Well, in this series of podcasts, Roy describes the BEST path to happiness and freedom. It is spiritual in nature, and it's about shifting from knowing to curiosity.
In this episode, you will learn:
· The ego's least favorite 3-word sentence;
· How knowing is keeping you single;
· Wh...
256 The 5-Fold Path to Happiness & Freedom, Pt. 4—Don't Recall
Happiness and freedom are what we ultimately want, but what path should we follow to get there? Should we pursue meaningful relationships, lasting intimacy, financial security, purpose and meaning, health, family, fame or religion? Or is it something else entirely?
Well, in this series of podcasts, Roy describes the BEST path to happiness and freedom. It is spiritual in nature, and it's about shifting from recalling to forgiving.
In this episode, you will learn:
· How the past creates unhappiness;
· 3 simple steps to letting go of the past;
· ...
255 The 5-Fold Path to Happiness & Freedom, Pt. 3—Don't Attach
Happiness and freedom are what we ultimately want, but what path should we follow to get there? Should we pursue meaningful relationships, lasting intimacy, financial security, purpose and meaning, health, family, fame or religion? Or is it something else entirely?
Well, in this series of podcasts, Roy describes the BEST path to happiness and freedom. It is spiritual in nature, and it's about shifting from attachment to trust.
In this episode, you will learn:
· About the "sticky finger" problem;
· How recognizing impermanence leads to happiness;
· The true meaning of...
254 The 5-Fold Path to Happiness & Freedom, Pt. 2—Don't Resist
When it's all said and done, happiness and freedom is what we all ultimately want. But what path should we follow? There are many to choose from. Is it meaningful relationships, lasting intimacy, financial security, health, family, fame or religion? Or is it something else?
In the previous episode, Roy explained that the best path to happiness and freedom must be (1) in your control, (2) available now and (3) something that makes sense to everyone.
And none of the most popular paths to happiness—relationships, intimacy, money, health, family, fame, religion, or even a co...
253 The 5-Fold Path to Happiness & Freedom, Pt. 1—Choose Your Path Wisely
When it's all said and done, happiness and freedom is what we all ultimately want. But what path should we follow? There are many to choose from. Is it meaningful relationships, lasting intimacy, financial security, health, family, fame or religion? Or is it something else? And more importantly, how do know which path is best?
In the first episode of this life-changing 6-part series, Roy, our host, not only examines the most common and popular paths to happiness and freedom, but he offers a simple criterion for determining which one is the best—which path to...
252 Every Day is New Year's Day: Thoughts on Living Your Best Life — Today
Though this is a New Year's Eve episode, it's one that applies to any day of the year because every day offers an opportunity to begin again, to Delete, Repeat and Create.
If you're looking for some pithy wisdom that can help you live your best life today—and every day—don't miss this episode.
Additional Resources Roy may have mentioned on the show:
Roy's Website: https://coachingwithroy.com
Roy's Relationship Fitness Self-Assessment Test: https://coachingwithroy.com/the-relationship-fitness-self-test/
Roy's 4 Books:
251 Being Ready for Your Christmas Moment
If you read the Christmas story in the Bible, you'll notice that the events before and after the birth of Christ were met with great fanfare and miracles. Angels appeared and declared amazing things were about to happen, and wise men followed special stars to witness this historic moment.
But in this very short episode, Roy, our host, reminds us that as we visit with family and friends, we should be ready for those small, seemingly inconsequential moments where offering our presence, attention and compassion (to an adult or child) might make all the difference i...
250 How to Have Happy Holidays
While we all say, "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays," are they? Are they merry and happy? Well, in this episode, Roy, our host, says that if we pay attention to 3 things, our holiday season will be truly merry and happy.
If you want to enjoy the coming days, don't miss this episode.
Additional Resources Roy may have mentioned on the show:
Roy's Website: https://coachingwithroy.com
Roy's Relationship Fitness Self-Assessment Test: https://coachingwithroy.com/the-relationship-fitness-self-test/
Roy's 4 Books:
· Quantum Que...
249 Conquering the Fear that is Keeping You Stuck and Single
One day—and it's a very alarming day—you realize that the only thing keeping you from having the life (and love life) you want is fear.
You're scared of something, perhaps a few things (we all are), and that's what's holding you back from success, growth, freedom and especially intimacy.
We need to have a frank and honest conversation about fear and how to conquer our respective anchors, for if we don't, we'll stay stuck and single.
This is the final installment of a 7-part series where R...
248 Mastering the Dating Game
We're all sick of people playing games in the dating scene, but in a sense, everyone is playing a game, meaning, everyone has an M.O., a method of operating.
Getting clear on your Relationship M.O. and mastering it, is a critical issue and it's the topic of this podcast.
In this episode, you will learn that there are only two "dating games," two Relationship M.O.'s, and which game you choose to play is probably the most important decision you'll ever make.
This is par...
247 Afraid of "Killer B's"? You Should Be. They're Killing Your Pursuit of Intimacy
There was a horrible story in the news recently where a father and son were killed by a swarm of "murder hornets" while zip-lining in the country of Laos.
That is tragic, and I don't mean to make light of it when I say your love life is being killed by a bunch of "Killer B's" too.
Those B's are: Blind Spots, Baggage, Beliefs and Barriers. And unless and until you deal with them in your life, you won't attract lasting love.
This is part five of a 7...
246 The Single Insight That Leads to Attracting Lasting Love
You have probably tried just about everything to find your life partner. You've sought the wisdom of the "experts"—watching their videos, reading their books and listening to their podcasts. You've tried a few online dating sites or perhaps hired a matchmaker. You've talked to your friends, to your therapist, even your God.
And… bupkis. Nothing. You're still single.
And it's not because you need better experts, dating sites, therapists or even a better God. What you need is one single insight that will unlock the whole mystery as to why you're...
245 Why Seeking a Relationship Keeps You from Having One
What if it is your desire for a relationship that is keeping you from having one? That is such a crazy suggestion, isn't it?
But what if it's true?
Could it be that hidden within our desire to be in a relationship was an unconscious motivation that was, in fact, sabotaging us and keeping us from a healthy connection?
In this episode, I am suggesting that very thing, that we are our own worst enemy when it comes to attracting lasting love, but we don't know it!
This is pa...
244 The Secret to Being a "High Value" Partner
What do you bring to the table? This is a question being asked on social media, podcasts and nearly everywhere people discuss dating and relationships. And while it's often asked in a judgmental and condemning way, it is a legitimate question.
What makes us a great partner? A "high value" partner?
You'll be glad to know that it's not beauty or bucks, but something much deeper and surprisingly simple. It's our ability to be present and authentic.
This is part two of a 7-part series where Roy off...
243 What Relationship Costume Are You Wearing? (Halloween Special)
Since it's Halloween week, our host, Roy Biancalana, takes a deep dive into some of the destructive relationship costumes we often wear in our pursuit of intimacy. Are we being ourselves or are we playing a role or showing up in some sort of fear-driven persona?
This is part one of a 7-part series where Roy answers the 7 questions found in his newest book, Quantum Questions: How Answering 7 Radical Questions Leads to Attracting a Healthy, Lasting, Intimate Relationship.
This Halloween episode appropriately discusses the first question in the book, Who Am I...
242 David Deida: Opening Beyond Self to Infinity
In this episode, Roy shares a recording from one of his favorite spiritual teachers, David Deida. Deida is a leading voice in conscious relationships, especially when it comes to masculine/feminine dynamics.
Given the culture wars going on these days around sex and gender, David's message is even more necessary and powerful.
Don't miss this episode!
Additional Resources Roy may have mentioned on the show:
Roy's Website: https://coachingwithroy.com
Roy's Relationship Fitness Self-Assessment Test: https://coachingwithroy.com/the-relationship-fitness-self-test/
241 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 7: Aliveness is Prioritized
What does a healthy relationship look and function like? That's the focus of this 7-part series. The goal is to paint an accurate and aspirational picture of how two people behave in a conscious, loving relationship by discussing the seven components of heathy intimacy.
In this episode, you'll learn the last component of healthy intimacy: Aliveness.
The underlying purpose of a great relationship is the aliveness of the individuals in it. In other words, the reason two healthy people commit to one another is that they believe that each of them ar...
240 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 6: Appreciation is Spoken
What does a healthy relationship look and function like? That's the focus of this 7-part series. The goal is to paint an accurate and aspirational picture of how two people behave in a conscious, loving relationship by discussing the seven components of heathy intimacy.
In this episode, you'll learn the sixth component of healthy intimacy: Appreciation.
In great relationships, appreciation is not just felt, it's verbally spoken. But it's more than saying "thank you" or "I appreciate you." It's seeing beyond a person's mere actions, to seeing the heart, intention and mo...
239 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 5: Agreements are Kept
What does a healthy relationship look and function like? That's the focus of this 7-part series. The goal is to paint an accurate and aspirational picture of how two people behave in a conscious, loving relationship by discussing the seven components of heathy intimacy.
In this episode, you'll learn the fifth component of healthy intimacy: Agreements.
The secret sauce of great relationships is trust. But don't tell yourself that trust is a complicated or complex thing. It isn't. Trust is the easiest thing in the world to build and maintain. All we need to do is...
237 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 4: Affection is Felt
What does a healthy relationship look and function like? That's the focus of this 7-part series. The goal is to paint an accurate and aspirational picture of how two people behave in a conscious, loving relationship by discussing the seven components of heathy intimacy.
In this episode, you'll learn the fourth component of healthy intimacy: Affection.
One of the signs that a relationship is healthy is that there is a lot of physical affection. There is touching, kissing, holding, hugging, and of course, sexing. And in this episode, you'll hear all ab...
236 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 3: Authenticity is Expressed
What does a healthy relationship look and function like? That's the focus of this 7-part series. The goal is to paint an accurate and aspirational picture of how two people behave in a conscious, loving relationship by discussing the seven components of heathy intimacy.
In this episode, you'll learn the third component of healthy intimacy: Authenticity.
One of the hallmarks of a great relationship, is that each person in the relationship not only is aware of what's going on inside themselves, but they are also committed to being completely open and ho...
238 Who Killed Charlie Kirk? (It's not who they say it is)
In this special edition of the podcast, Roy Biancalana, our host, shares important information on who actually killed Charlie Kirk.
It's not some college kid dressed in black wearing a baseball cap. No, the assasination was done by a far more sinister and scary group of people.
Tune into this short, 18-minute episode because the future of your life and our country just might depend on it.
235 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 2: Acceptance is Given
What does a healthy relationship look and function like? That's the focus of this 7-part series. The goal is to paint an accurate and aspirational picture of how two people behave in a conscious, loving relationship by discussing the seven components of heathy intimacy.
In this episode, you'll learn the second component of healthy intimacy: Acceptance.
In great relationships, the atmosphere is permeated with unconditional love and acceptance. The couple is not trying to change or control each other because they love each other as they are. However, that doesn't mean ev...
234 The 7 Components of Healthy Intimacy, Pt. 1: Alignment is Shared
Frequently on this podcast, Roy Biancalana, our host, focuses on the beliefs, blind spots, baggage and behaviors that sabotage our ability to attract lasting love. That's because, as the mystic poet Rumi said nearly 800 years ago, "Your task is not to seek love, but instead, to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." So, it's appropriate to talk about the barriers that keep us single.
But that's not the focus of this 7-part series.
Here you will learn how a healthy relationship functions. The go...
233 When to Walk Away: Thoughts on When (and how!) To End a Relationship
When Kenny Rogers sang, "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em; know when to walk away, know when to run," he was talking about gambling and playing cards. But little did he know that he was also giving some great relationship advice, too!
We all need to know when to hold on to someone and when to let them go, when to walk away from a relationship and when to run. So, in this episode, Roy explores when to end a relationship and how to do it in the most c...
232 Perspectives on Parenting: What I Got Right, What I Got Wrong, and What We All Can Learn
In honor of his son's upcoming 31st birthday, our host, Roy Biancalana, describes his successes and failures as a parent with incredible vulnerability. You'll hear him describe, in great detail, the things he did wrong as a dad, while also celebrating the things he did right.
Whether you are a parent, aspire to be a parent, if you have parents or know a parent, there is something valuable for you to learn from this episode.
Don't miss it.
Additional Resources Roy may have mentioned on the show:
...