Duck Logic Comedy 1/2 Hour | Talk, Sketches & More
Podcast-y talk like you'd expect with a little something extra--- comedy sketches, commercial parodies & funny songs... Presented by the Chicago improv comedy group called Duck Logic!! New stuff and stuff pulled from the archives of their WLUP AM1000 radio show called The Cavalcade.
Oops! All talking #2: "Jesus was the original Long John Silver."
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Okay, we seriously needed a break so we’re dropping a “best of” from the archives---
That time we uncovered the truth behind Amelia Earhart’s disappearance and how there was someone with her on the plane! That time we did a show with a young Andy Dick. And then a church on TV calls their viewers “shut-ins.”
Oops! All talking #1: “You don’t want a bent carrot following you.”
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The Duck Logic guys are taking a much-needed break but didn’t wanna leave their loyal listeners hangin’, so here’s a little replay from the archives---
That time they talked about the pharma commercial with a cure for “crooked carrot” disease and Jim gettin’ lucky with a girl on the kitchen floor. Enjoy!
174: "The traditional William Shatner film festival."
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TALK: Living in an empty Hobby Lobby. A used pornography store. Betty Page. Elvis movies for the 21st century. And we question Jim’s “friendship” with the kids in his neighborhood.
SKETCHES: Canadian Labor Day. Larry David meets Zendaya. Kenny has a bonfire. Our audio centerfold. And a newsman tells a joke. Plus a few more things.
173: "I fed a banana to a goose."
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TALK: Crappy movie previews. “Poop coffee.” A zoo in Demark that’ll feed your pets to their lions. Farting at Veggie Fest. And Jim tells us about his best moment.
SKETCHES: Not-so-monster trucks. Franz Kafta’s bucket list. A song about lawyers. And whale farts.Â
172: "There's no telling where my penis will end up."
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TALK: Billy Jack, Kung Fu, Oddjob, Pale Rider, Buford Pusser. And Lollapalooza.Â
SKETCHES: Pajamas. Dudes in college. A hairbrush that works underwater. Flying Bad Boys.Â
171: "That's exactly how roast beef sounds."
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TALK: Our Last Supper musical. Ozzy’s funeral. Food touching. Chicago diners. Mohicans. And Billy Joel’s drinking, um, issues.Â
SKETCHES: Side Tracker, a detective who can't stay on task. The elephant in the room. A pretty complete back-to-college sale. And unless business advice. Plus more!
170: "We were getting along but we changed our mind."
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The guys talk about Walt’s new haircut. Ozzy, of course. Old geezer musical acts. Judgmental state fairs. And comedians lip-syncing jokes.
THEN sketches: Limericks from Pipefitters Union 597. Mini memorabilia. And an audio art project.
169: "I had a music teacher named Mr. Fluff."
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TALK: Shopping on the cheap. Defective foods. The passing of a stand-up we knew. Way too alternative bands. Roller rink tunes. And the tiny civilization that lives under a theater stage.
SKETCHES: Tales from the last tollbooth attendant. A highly opinionated traveler. A filter for the dumb things you say at work. And very durable condoms.
168: "The ass-less chaps were a nice touch."
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Talk: Jurassic Park sequels. The joy of scooterboards. The violence of The Honeymooners. Old TV war shows. Spinoff podcasts like: shirts vs. screwdrivers.
Sketches: Disinterested theater productions. Incoherent political shows. Suburban bars. Questionable grocery stores. Realistic porn.
167: "They're like furries but with pigeons."
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The guys talk about A.I. rock bands, A.I. commercials, and A.I. manifestos. Plus, crop dusting (the smelly kind), Jayne Mansfield, mac and cheese gummies, and Tim has mic trouble.
Then sketches… Poetic tributes to Benny Hill, notes from Walter’s brain, summer bars, and ancient poop.
166: "As long as the bat wears a teeny, tiny condom."
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Insects in basements. Bats in toilets. Laser scopes. Really bad movies. Watching the neighbor’s TV.
Then: the truth about the constitution, jacked up mid-summer sale prices, a fool’s errand. Plus, more.
165: "Their poop is very nutritious."
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The Duck Logic guys talk about worm farmers, competitive kite flying, grocery stores on wheels, and the children’s show Diver Dan.
Then: rhetorical questions, mushy cigarettes, a needless health class film, and a must-have unless kitchen item.
164: "It's starting to look like a drug den."
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This week, the conversation is about drug dens, how there used to be stereos, welding, shop class mishaps, Ferris Bueller and the joys of southern Illinois.Â
Then: sketches about a sale on matzas and the Shroud of Turin. Pajamas. Well-read mountain folk. And a song about water.
163: "Who's going to give me a ride home?"
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The guys discuss goiters versus gout, then reminisce about the movie they made. Or did they? Plus the man with the most things. A little TMI at the morning status meeting. And: Terror.
162: "Up and down all day long until he pukes."
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New superhero movies, old Batman villains, Japanese schoolgirls, and blind drunk businessmen. Then sketches about Sammy Davis impersonators, Bob Dylan’s migraine, space janitors, and guys with unrealistic expectations.
161: "He farts cuz he's happy."
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Jim gets a voicemail from a kinky/leather website and tells us about his “special friendship” he had with a goat. Tim tells us how he lived under the family sink. And Walt had a pet alligator.
Then sketches: a way-below-average doctor, a very basic truck driving school, a not-so-amusing amusement park, and a rug full of coffee.
160: "Another episode of 'Jim Talks to Children.'"
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Jim finds some cigs. Walt gets creeped out by a guy with a piggy bank head. And Tim tells us where memes come from. And, of course, Attack Squirrels.Â
Then sketches about firm handshakes. Adequate construction. On hold hell. Cheery-flavored beer brewed far away from here.
159: "I don't get artificially inseminated. I get inseminated."
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Peeing in the Stanley Cup. Flinging a Wimbledon platter. Or wearing Masters green jackets with or without pants. The guys discuss them all. And Tim tells us how he’s tight with the new pope because they were childhood buds. Then sketches about where to go after prom. Where not to get your car fixed. And Ken Burns finally runs out of topics.
158: "Don't talk to anybody named Manny!"
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The guys discuss cheating on book reports, turning the dark film classic “Taxi Driver” into a musical, and how Walter got a subscription to Playboy for his 14th birthday.
Plus: the hard-driving dedication of Jehovah’s Witnesses, very specific Zodiac predictions, a prescription strength breakfast cereal, and a lawyer who can get anyone off the hook. Plus a few more things.
157: "Time to break some commandments, ladies!"
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We’re Back!! Tim’s putting his “miter” in the ring to be the new Pope and the tells us all about it. Then we wonder why scientists would make robots that can run!
Then sketches about a new religious murder-solving show, temporary mobsters, teaching kids about the real world of work, and a song that’s just asking for it.
Season 8 Teaser: "Is that the bone I'm tickling?"
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A whole new season of The Duck Logic Comedy Half Hour starts any day now!
Something different for your ears. Podcast-y talk like you find on other pods, plus comedy bits and sketches like they do on Saturday Night Live. All from the Chicago comedy group called Duck Logic that played clubs and colleges, did network TV, and produced a 2-hour sketch show on WLUP-AM 1000, a pretty big radio station in its day.Â
Extra Stuff 5: "The Stalin jockstrap runs about $20."
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With the Duck Logic guys still out, A.I. Announcer, Brian dug deep into the old WLUP radio show archives and found this little nugget---Â
The time Tim, as Bruce “Rooster” Cogburn, the host of Rock Rap, improvises an interview with an actual Chicago rock band named Chetyre Pevo (translated: “Four Beers”) as they pretend to be a band from Mother Russia.
Extra Stuff 4: "Chocolate makes me more stupid than I am already."
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The guys are still away, but Brian, their A.I. announcer, offers up a 2-fer of gems from their Chicago radio show that haven’t been on the pod before.
First, a downright sweet sketch from Bob Odenkirk about one man’s discovery of true happiness. Then Tim does a Comic Strip Countdown in the style of Casey Kasem’s classic syndicated 70s-80s radio program: America’s Top 40.
Obscure references galore!!
Extra Stuff 3: "Our proofreaders don't pussyfoot around with punctuation."
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Duck Logic’s vay-cay continues with a sketch Tim wrote for an “all-news” concept episode of their 2-hour comedy radio show on WLUP-AM in Chicago back in the day. It's an abridged version of the original, okay rather lengthy parody of a hard-hitting, investigative exposé of small-town local events called “The Interrogators.” Sounds wacky, right?
Extra Stuff 2: "I like the plush velour and a little plastic on the furniture."
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The guys are still on break. But here’s your weekly dose of DL--- another improvised interview from Duck Logic’s 2-hour radio show on WLUP-AM in Chicago. This time with Tim’s running character named Marty Farty, a sleezy TV mogul who’s starting a sleezy network filled with sleezy programming.
A word of warning: it’s a bit raunchy, a tad juvenile, and rated PG 13. And it’s chock full of obscure references to old television shows. Don’t say you haven’t been warned.
Extra Stuff 1: "Who’s gonna lay this gaffer’s tape? Who’s gonna drink all this free beer?"
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The guys are taking a much-deserved break.
But you can still get your DL fix with this snippet, um, nugget, er, previously not played bit—an improvised interview between Tim and Bob Odenkirk (yes, THAT Bob Odenkirk!)
He and Tim were classmates in college and Bob was invited to be a cast member on Duck Logic’s 2-hour radio show on WLUP-AM in Chicago back before SNL, before Mister Show, or before Saul.Â
Enjoy…Â
156: "That's how they make people sing in prison."
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Walter, Tim, and Jim talk about showering in gym class and in prison, old guys at the health club who parade around naked, and how Jim named his penis Captain Bibi. Plus, casting for the new live action Barney movie.
Then: the truth about Ford trucks, the best places to party at Easter, why Walter thinks his body is a car, just plain stupidity, and a few more things.
155: "There was Canoe, Aramis, and Toxic Masculinity."
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The guys talk way too much about dog poop. Then they come up with a really super superhero, and discuss women who glow in the dark.
There are sketches about the new Saturday night lineup on PBS, your third amendment rights, getting those lying babies to tell the truth, and more.
154: "Hi there! It's Sailor Jack, everybody!"
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Walt, Tim, and Jim talk about bobbleheads, what passes for food in England, the million-dollar idea Tim has when he was 7, and politically incorrect corn chips. Then, Jim’s new egg-themed bitcoin, the real Bruce Springsteen, and a sports bar for guys who like to watch sports in a bar with other guys who like to watch sports. Plus, a couple more things.
153: “Familiar characters who never really acknowledge my existence.”
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In their first encore compilation episode--- Walt, Tim, Jim, and Dave compare their favorite “Jackson,” then reminisce about that time Duck Logic did improv on ice skates. Or did they?
Plus, sketches about a different kind of talk radio station, keeping up with the Johnson family, the secret lives of weathermen, a presidential slasher, winter fun at a strawberry farm, and more.
152: "Mister Gut Leakage."
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The guys talk about medical uses for maggots and leeches, and Tim’s obsession with gut leakage. Then Walter describes his little leather Speedo and prosthetic abs but can’t convince Tim and Jim to get surgery to change the color of their eyes.
Also, sketches about a vague pick-up bar, Jean Smiley’s Valentine traditions, and the truth about a psychic wife is stranger than fiction.
Season 4 Teaser
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What happens when a Chicago sketch comedy radio show from the past gathers their classic bits— along with new skits, songs, and improv —into a weekly podcast? You get the goofiest gabfest laugh riot this side of the Internet. You’ll laugh… and how!
151: "Wimpy watches from the chair in the hotel room."
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The guys talk about Pamela Anderson going makeup-less, the Mickey Mouse slasher movie, why someone hasn't made a Popeye porn video yet, and why 52 seems to be the magic number for men to have heart attacks.
Then a scofflaw game show sketch, adult diapers can be fun, a sale on over-sized musical instruments, and whatever happened to those chanting monks?
150: "A fine array of toilet wines."
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The guys talk about some people install toilets right in the middle of their basements and how Tim can whip up excellent toilet wine. Then a Rain Man prequel, boxer concussions, and why everyone's into manscaping. Plus, sketches about a car dealer that sells brown cars, trouble with time travel, a guy who's good at selling stuff, and theater for snobs. Plus--- a few more things!
149: "That guy should wipe his ass once in a while."
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Jim’s come to realize the Nissan Rogue he bought from Dave’s wife makes people think he’s an old lady. And Jim tells Walt about a Colorado guy whose legs got caught in a woodchipper and about the comedy club owner with a smelly butt. There are sketches about Girl Scouts joining the Army, a raunchy microbrew beer, a diner that sources its menu from the highway, Mr. Analogy, and more.
148: "Talk about your poo poo poopy poo poos."
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Tim tells us about his plans to open manifesto writing classes and how important juice is to him--- any kind of juice. Jim recalls how a stranger called him a “jag in a bag.” Then there are sketches about mini memorabilia, a patient in search of a disease, and coffee so strong it puts hair on your tongue. Plus, more stuff.
147: "While you're there, why don't you donate sperm?"
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The guys talk about eye surgery. Jim encourages Tim and Walt to donate sperm. Tim has his doubts about Johnny Depp’s teeth. And evidence that the new Fed Ex campaign is plagiarizing-ly close to a long-running Duck Logic bit. Then sketches about wheelie bags, a store with a sale on "mystery boxes," how to get the best food in jail, and a big guy... a really big guy. And a few more things.
146: "I've seen your bread. It's not worth buttering."
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Tim explains why he thinks New Year’s Eve is wimpy and sings a couple country songs. The guys try and fail to get political. Then there are sketches about hot spots you should maybe skip for New Year's Eve. A drive up comedy club. Another thing that doesn’t translate to audio. A drive-thru comedy club. Plus a few more things.
145: "Smell like you mean it."
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The guys come up with a new catch phrase. Walter tells us how he used to buy weed for his dad for Christmas. And Tim talks about his job tasting fentanyl and anthrax. Then… we get the real truth about Santa. An online breakfast treat. And a bunch of ads for perfume. Plus a couple more things.
144: "Are you gonna eat that?"
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Walter introduces the other guys to “shower beer.” Jim tells us horrible cat stories and how his one-man musical based on "Coach" is coming along. Then: Beer for boneheads. Shopping for babies. Nine-year-old Tim’s trip across the border. And posing for a picture with Jesus. Plus, there’s more!
