UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

Social media can be a surprisingly powerful tool when it comes to changing how you think about your body. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener question about using intentional visual exposure on social media to improve body image. I explain why deliberately engaging with images that reflect diverse and relatable bodies can help retrain your brain’s perceptions, and why it is important to practice these thoughts in a variety of situations, not just while scrolling social media .

Then, I tackle what happens when a partner shuts down during an argument. You'll he...

Have you been wondering whether coaching could be a career path for you, or something you bring into the work you're already doing?

If you can't stop thinking about that, this episode is for you. What it means to be a coach today is far more varied and interesting than most people assume, and most of you are better suited for it than you realize. I explain who is well-suited for coaching, what it actually entails, and how it can fit into different professional and personal contexts.

I also address the...

Coach-Curious Prep School is a 5-day incubator where you'll learn if coaching is the right career for you, what you need to do to prepare for a successful coaching career, and the next steps to take to begin – or expand – your life as a coach.

It's happening June 22-26, 2026.

Click here to learn more and register: https://the-school-of-new-feminist-thought.captivate.fm/curious

Women often hold themselves back in ways they don’t even notice. This week, I explore the two biggest ways this happens: not asking for what you want and not telling the truth about how you feel. I break down how socialization and internalized beliefs train women to downplay their desires, soften their emotions, and edit themselves in real time, leaving them disconnected from what they actually want and who they really are.

You’ll hear why these two patterns show up across careers, relationships, and daily life, and how they subtly shape the decisions you...

Divorce can be overwhelming, especially when you are trying to figure out how to explain it to your children. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener's question about the first stage of divorce, talking about it with her kids, and why starting with your thoughts and feelings, not just actions, is what makes the next steps clear.

I also tackle a question about people-pleasing and seeking external validation. You'll hear why prioritizing other people’s needs over your own can feel like love and connection, but it actually undermines your authenticity, and how to...

Think about something you really wanted, something you worked for or waited for, or told yourself would finally change how you felt about your life. Maybe it was a job, a relationship, a business milestone, or a body you thought would make you feel confident.

And then you got it, and the feeling did not last.

That is the human void, and in this episode I explain what it is, why it shows up even after achievement, and how to relate to it without letting it control you. You'll learn why...

Managing your mind during PMS can feel impossible, even when you know thought work and self-coaching strategies. In this episode, I answer a listener question about how hormonal changes or cyclical patterns affect emotional resilience. I also tackle a question about disappointment and whether feeling let down is a cop-out.

As you’ll hear, managing your thoughts and feelings intentionally can change how you respond to difficult moments, from PMS to social or personal setbacks. This episode shows you how to separate physical or situational challenges from the stories your mind tells you about them, he...

There is one thought that quietly sabotages almost every goal you care about, and you probably don’t even realize it’s a thought because it sounds like a fact.

In this episode, I break down the three words that stop us from following through on what we want and explain why believing this thought can make it feel impossible to achieve the results you are working toward. Plus, I share a three-step practice you can use to rewire this pattern. Listen in, because changing this thought can be the difference between quitting too soon and...

Do you ever find yourself planning for the future and imagining how perfect it's going to be? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions about fantasies and expectations. I explore why romanticizing the future can take you out of the present and why trying to control your thoughts about someone else only makes you feel more out of control.

I break down how our brains trick us into conflating circumstances and thoughts, showing why happiness and fulfillment are created by the thoughts you are having now, not by money, experiences, or other...

How many times have you been doing the work, trying to change, and then completely lost it? You yelled at your kids, said yes when you meant no, or spent money you promised yourself you wouldn't, and thought, "I am failing. This is not working. I should just give up." We’ve all done this, which means we’ve all quit on change when we were already in the process, but just couldn’t see it.

In this episode, I break down the six stages of behavior change so you can see that you are alread...

Making friends as an adult can feel intimidating, especially when it seems like your upbringing didn't give you the skills to navigate social connections. In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions about friendships and social interactions. I explore why it is possible to build friendships while continuing your self-work, and why the story you tell yourself about your friendship skills can keep you stuck.

I also tackle the tricky line between honesty and people pleasing. I break down why volunteering opinions that nobody asked for is not automatically people pleasing and why...

This week, I break down the three foundational principles that will allow you to coach yourself effectively, no matter where you are on your thought work journey. If you’re new to the podcast, this is an essential episode to ground you in the basics of cognitive change. If you’ve been here a while, I guarantee you’ll hear these keys in a new light, ready to take them deeper.

Listen in to discover why thoughts create feelings, which drive behavior, and why trying to change your actions to feel better is a recipe for fa...

What’s the point of setting goals if you already feel how you want to feel? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener question about thought work and goals, and why it can feel like your whole motivational system breaks when you stop chasing goals just to feel differently about yourself.

I also answer a question about the philosophical underpinnings of thought work, moral objectivism, and whether thought work requires you to believe there is no objective good or bad. You'll hear why thought work is not a purity exercise, why it can st...

How many times have you promised yourself that this time you were finally going to stop procrastinating? Maybe you bought another planner to color-code, or scoured the internet for the best productivity tips. You want to solve this problem, but what if procrastination isn't the problem you think it is?

In this episode, I show you why procrastination is not a character flaw, a willpower problem, or proof that you are secretly broken. It is an emotional avoidance strategy, and once you understand that, you can finally stop trying to solve it at the wrong...

Social media will happily turn your nervous system into a tiny squirrel hunting for dopamine, my friends. This week, I coach a listener who keeps checking likes and engagement on posts for her business. Instead of treating likes, commissions, creative desire, and income as one tangled emotional knot, I show you how to separate the questions so your brain can stop making Instagram engagement mean everything about your art, your business, or your worth.

Then, I answer a deeper question about emotional vulnerability and thought work, especially in relation to Brené Brown’s work. This epi...

So many women think there’s something wrong with their sex drive, when the real issue is how they’ve been taught to relate to their body. In this episode, I sit down with sex coach Laura Jurgens to explore why low libido is not just a mindset problem or a medical issue, and how repeated experiences, socialization, and nervous system patterns shape your relationship with intimacy.

If you’ve been feeling disconnected from your desire or unsure how to create a more fulfilling sex life, this episode will help you see what’s actually getting...

Do you struggle to feel at peace with your body when you gain weight? Or worry that gaining weight will result in health issues? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I invite you to challenge the beliefs that weight is synonymous with health and that health is synonymous with morality (spoiler alert, it's not).

Then, I tackle a listener question about unclear work expectations and how that impacts their perceived success in the role. I show you how to step into clarity and confidence so you can take action on what matters most and stop feeling...

Have you ever gotten so close to a goal, and then one thing to goes wrong, and your brain immediately decide the whole thing was a mistake? That moment right before the finish line is where so many people quit. In this episode, I introduce a concept I call The Last 5% and showing you why your brain is most likely to turn progress into proof that you’re not capable right when you’re closest to getting the result you want.

If you’ve ever stopped just short of what you wanted or told yourself all yo...

Does your brain go straight to worst-case scenarios when you think about someone you love, and make you feel like it’s your job to prevent them all? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I coach someone through intense anxiety about their child’s future and explain why believing you are responsible for everything that could happen is what’s actually creating the panic.

Then I answer a question about staying motivated during a job search, and why trying to force motivation when you don’t know what you want is never going to work. If you stru...

Do you ever tell yourself, “What I’m doing isn’t enough, so I might as well not bother”? That thought is exactly what’s keeping you stuck. In this episode, I’m teaching one of my favorite concepts for getting out of overwhelm and into action: The Infinite 1%. You'll see why doing a little is actually everything.

If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed by how far you have to go or waiting until you can do something perfectly, this is going to change how you think about progress. You’ll learn why your brain dismisses small...

Why is it so hard to let go of something that happened years ago, even when you know it shouldn’t matter anymore? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I coach someone through what it really takes to release an old grudge without pretending it didn’t hurt.

Then I answer a question about attractiveness and the belief that you can control whether other people are attracted to you based on how you present yourself. If you’ve been holding onto resentment or trying to control how others see you, this episode will help you understand why th...

Do you keep telling yourself you’ll finally get it together tomorrow, once you feel more ready, more clear, or more “on top of things”?

In this episode, I revisit two of the most powerful patterns that keep you stuck: perfectionist fantasies and tomorrow thinking. I break down how your brain convinces you that the reason you’re not taking action today is because conditions aren’t ideal yet, and how it sells you the idea that tomorrow will be different. This episode will show you how to stop waiting for a perfect future version of yoursel...

Are your thoughts during sex preventing you from reaching orgasm? This is a super common struggle for people socialized as women. We worry about taking too long or our partner getting bored or tired, and those thoughts are exactly what get in the way. In this week’s Coaching Hotline episode, I show you why trying to rush or fix the experience makes it harder, and how to start shifting the thoughts that are creating the pressure in the first place.

Then I coach someone who feels like there simply isn’t enough time to be a...

Have you built your entire life around waiting for motivation to text you back? In this episode, I explain why motivation is a fuckboy and why relying on it is the reason you start and stop, stall out, or never follow through on the things that matter most to you. Motivation feels amazing when it shows up, but it disappears the moment things get hard or uncomfortable, and when you treat it like a prerequisite, you give something unreliable total control over your progress.

If you’ve been waiting to feel ready, excited, or inspired be...

Do you worry that saying no makes you rude, selfish, or a bad person? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I break down why what you’ve been taught to call “politeness” is often just people pleasing in disguise, and how that conditioning keeps you stuck in self doubt.

Then I answer a question I hear all the time in different forms, what do you do when you understand thought work but you still can’t change your thoughts? I explain why you are not missing a tool, why nothing has gone wrong, and why this frustrat...

My new book "Take Back Your Brain: How a Sexist Society Gets in Your Head... and How to Get it Out" is officially available as an audiobook and hardcover wherever books and audiobooks are sold!

Click here to order yours: unfuckyourbrain.com/book

Mentioned in this episode:

Enroll now in Coach-Curious Prep School

In this five-day incubator, you’ll learn whether coaching is the right career for you, what you need to do to prepare for a successful coaching career, and the next steps to take to begin – or expand – your life a...

Have you ever felt stuck in your career or questioned whether you're on the right path? In this episode, I’m joined by my mastermind student Lisa who made the bold decision to transition from being a global CEO to pursuing her passion for running a dahlia farm. Her journey is a testament to the power of reinvention, and we dive into how she navigated that shift.

Lisa shares how she was able to tackle the fears and self-doubt that came with stepping away from the corporate world and how she’s now embracing a diff...

Do you ever feel completely exhausted but can’t quite figure out if it’s because your body is physically tired or if it’s the thoughts in your head making everything worse? In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into the complex relationship between physical fatigue and mental thoughts, and how you can shift your thinking no matter how tired you are.

Then, I dive into a question that comes up often in coaching: Should you focus on the immediate thoughts that are triggering your feelings or dig into the deeper, root cause of your belief...

Have you ever been caring for someone you love and suddenly felt resentful, exhausted, or completely overwhelmed? And then immediately thought, “What kind of person feels this way?” In this episode, I talk about the emotional reality of caregiving, especially for those of us in the Sandwich Generation who are supporting aging parents while also raising kids, managing careers, and trying to hold our own lives together.

You'll hear why caregiving guilt is so common and how socialization trains women to believe they should give endlessly without limits. I explore why the real problem isn’t the...

Does receiving feedback make you feel instantly defensive, embarrassed, or like you’ve done something terribly wrong?

In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions about how to handle criticism at work and how to know when you’ve coached yourself “correctly.” You’ll learn how to manage your mind around feedback, understand why feeling defensive is optional, and recognize that sometimes the answers you already have are the ones you need to keep practicing.

Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline

What if one of the most important financial decisions you ever make isn’t about investing, saving, or budgeting... but about who you choose as your partner?

In this episode, I’m joined by Vivian Tu, also known as Your Rich BFF, 2x New York Times bestselling author, and host of the podcast Networth and Chill. We discuss why money is not just about survival but about power, choice, and freedom. Vivian explains why women are often socialized to over compromise financially in relationships, how to adjust your mindset about money as a shared partnership decision, and why...

Does your brain love to tell you you're ugly, incapable, or untalented? What if it's right? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into a listener’s question about those persistent negative thoughts that tell us we’re not good enough. You’ll discover why it doesn't actually matter if they are objectively true or not, and why intentionally deciding how you think about yourself does.

I also answer a question about the concept of vibrations and energy, where a listener is struggling to understand how thought work connects with things like chemistry, energy healing, and even Reiki...

Join me at the Ritz Paris on Saturday, March 28, from 3:30–5:30 p.m.

While you enjoy a classic high tea, I will be joined by Master Coach Jenny Chammas, a top French women's leadership coach, to talk about how to tap into your confidence to achieve big goals in your life.

After our conversation there will be plenty of time for Q&A, and at the end you'll also get to meet Cecilie Søndergaard Nielsen, an executive leadership coach for senior leaders and teams in high-pressure, high-growth environments.

I...

I'm bringing you behind the scenes to give you a peek at how I coach myself on all the shit that comes up day to day. This is a 30-day series over on Instagram where you'll see me coach myself on everything from asking a mom to put headphones on her kid on the airplane to what to do when someone shows up at your door and asks for something that you don't want to give them.

All you need to do is follow me on Instagram, instagram.com/karaloewentheil. See you there!

If you feel like the world is on fire and the only appropriate response is constant outrage, this conversation will stretch you in the best way. I talk with psychotherapist and author Margaret Cullen about equanimity, what it actually means, and why it is not the same thing as apathy or disengagement. We unpack the idea that you can care deeply, take action, and still refuse to live in a state of emotional melodrama.

Margaret explains how equanimity helps you recover balance more quickly when you get hijacked by fear, anger, or despair. We connect this to...

Have you ever tried to teach thought work to someone you love, only to have them completely reject it? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a question from a mom who wants her teenage son to benefit from thought work but keeps running into pushback. I explain why 15 is not too young to understand emotional processing, but it is old enough to resist being coached without permission.

I also answer a question from a listener who is struggling with a long standing fear of heights that shows up intensely on tall bridges and airplanes. If you...

Do you make decisions based on what you actually want, or based on what would make you feel the least guilty? In this Greatest Hits episode, I break down how guilt and shame quietly become the emotional compass guiding our everyday choices, from small obligations to major life decisions, and why that often leaves us exhausted, resentful, or stuck.

I share how women in particular are socialized to treat guilt and shame like flashing moral warning signs, assuming that if we feel bad about not doing something, it must mean we should do it. I...

Do social events drain you? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into a listener's question about feeling exhausted at social events and why small talk often feels boring. I explore how your thoughts are creating that experience and why the key to enjoying social gatherings starts with shifting your mindset.

I also tackle a question about feeling like you have no desire for sex, and how to work through the thoughts causing fear and anxiety around intimacy. Tune in to discover how thought work can transform your experience at social events and in your...

Do you find yourself avoiding negative emotions at all costs, distracting yourself with food, Netflix, or your phone? What if you could build the capacity to feel any emotion, no matter how uncomfortable, and still keep moving forward? In this episode, I’m diving into the concept of microdosing negative emotions and why this practice is the key to becoming unstoppable.

Instead of pushing away the discomfort, we need to practice building safety around it, which is exactly what microdosing does. I’m walking you through how the microdosing approach helps you tolerate your emotions in manageable dose...

Do you feel like you’re stuck in a toxic relationship, but aren’t sure if it’s really the relationship or just your thoughts? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I dive into a listener’s question about how to tell if your relationship is toxic and how much of the issue comes down to your own thinking.

I also tackle a question on health anxiety, where the listener is worried that their weight isn’t going down despite making healthy changes, and fears they’re damaging their health. Discover how thought work can help you take con...