Lazysloth's RPG Podcast
Lazysloth's RPG (formerly Vanguard) is a monthly actual play tabletop roleplaying podcast featuring a Sloth and his many friends. We've play a different system every campaign to keep things spicy. Our podcast is kept family friendly by a team of baby sloths that edit out the bad words. We post our episodes on the 15th every month. Tune in to the goofs!
Threshold of Pain - A Paranoid Crossover
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This month we're returning to Paranoia in a very special crossover between Lazy Sloth RPGs and Golden Squad. We'll prove once and for all that the best icebreaker between new friends is treachery and murder in Alpha Complex.
Desperate Colonials - Session 23: Covert Weapons
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In this month's session the Pyrite finally returns to Shar; however, the tenuous alliance of its crew begins to show its cracks.Abound with ulterior motives, each member sets off on their own before their great ascent; to reunite, to reinforce, and to deliver a reckoning.
Goblin With a Fat Ass - “Sloth hits a New Bottom”
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In this month’s session, Sloth tries (and mostly fails) to negotiate with three unruly and bodacious goblins in their quest to seek glory, love, landships, and dinner.
Desperate Colonials - Session 22: Indecent Proposals
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We're doing something a little different this month. We're building player factions for the third and final act of the Desperate Colonial's story! The decisions our players make now will shape the future of the Ming system.
Desperate Colonials - Session 21: Too Far to Quit Now.
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Lock in, suit up, it's montage time. The Pyrite's crew is coming for your ship. Killer robots be damned!
Tales from Troubled Waters: the Legend of Gullencry and Kinsey
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Hello, fellow humans! This month, we take a departure from our regularly scheduled VI assassination programming to bring you a oneshot of Legends in the Mist! Follow Gullencry and Kinsey, two totally normal and mundane humans on a seafaring jaunt of grand proportions, featuring Medieval Kenny Loggins and all-you-can-eat adventure!
Desperate Colonials-Session 20:Milk is irrelevant
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In this month’s session, the Desperate Colonials investigate the mysterious incident leading to the deaths of thousands aboard Ming’s Hope. However, something seeks to add them to the death toll the closer they get to the truth, threatened by the exchange in hands of the Hope’s stewardship.
Desperate Colonials - Session 19: Ming’s Hope
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Finally tracking down the last known whereabouts of Ming, our desperate colonials prepare to board the vessel of the lost Emperor’s final resting place - the mysterious casket of an entire colony, lying in wait to be found again.
Desperate Colonials - Session 18: The Last Place You Look
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The crew of the Pyrite Eldorado strategize on how they can save C-Dawg from permanent deletion, but something far more serious has escaped their notice, possibly dooming their entire journey.
Desperate Colonials - Episode 17: The Bellow from Below
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In this month’s episode of Desperate Colonials, Sanatio and the Mystery Gang delve deeper into the wilderness to uncover the enigmatic last days of the alien jungle colony. However, something slumbering deep below may have their answer for them before they can ask. For those who want to skip the long intro, the session begins at 12:44.
Desperate Colonials - Episode 17: The Bellow from Below
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In this month’s episode of Desperate Colonials, Sanatio and the Mystery Gang delve deeper into the wilderness to uncover the enigmatic last days of the alien jungle colony. However, something slumbering deep below may have their answer for them before they can ask. For those who want to skip the long intro, the session begins at 12:44.
Desperate Colonials - Session 16: The Spores and You
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In this month’s episode, the crew of the Pyrite El Dorodo tie up loose ends on Ming 3 and venture forth into exotic and hostile jungle climes of Ming 7. Continuing on their search for the lost Emperor, will they finally find the object of their quest, or will the danger lurking in the alien jungle find them first?
Desperate Colonials - Session 15: Psychic Heresy on Ming 3
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In this month’s episode, our Desperadoes are determined to liberate Ming 3 of Kali’s wrath. Will they prove to be the bane of the immortal storm goddess herself, or will the sky come crashing down on them?
Desperate Colonials - Session 14: “When the Bough Breaks”
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The hideous faces behind the mask of paradise are revealed. Now our crew must make a choice - sacrificing the garden of innocents or bringing the world crashing down on their heads as the psionic of storm of Kali herself threatens Ming’s enclosure of Eden.
Desperate Colonials - Session 13: Fashionably Late
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Our crew of Desperadoes lands on Ming 3 to find a desolate landscape of destruction and mystery. With their arrival stirs something sinister within the wreckages of the colony’s corpse as they search for the remains of Ming himself. However, despite their grim charge, they find themselves to be the life of the party.
Desperate Colonials - Session 12: The Inimitable Crimson Earth
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Ready, set, GO! This month in the Shar system our friendly under dogs, Sonny and Adrien, race their way to victory. But before they can do that, they need to get their racing buggy ready!
Will the ketchup race lines give the two the ability to pull off the win they always wanted?
Get your popcorn and radios ready because we find out on today's episode!
Desperate Colonials - Episode 11: Planet Shaking Revelations
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In this month’s episode, the Desperados are at the mercy of the Council of Captains, awaiting the fate of their captain and their ambitious venture against the nefarious whims of Diamondtooth - while also learning a secret from an unlikely source.
Golden Squad: https://open.spotify.com/show/3nDBzDvg1VY7BJLBQzSfkN?si=xytuv4WnTUeWApGFUZE-Qg
The Crit Cantina: https://open.spotify.com/show/31H7gXkn2v723BwOCJ5IVu?si=nlTsFnjjRRKRAFxYnQi45w
Desperate Colonials - Session 10: Sausage and Mind Games
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Ya like jazz? Diamond Tooth seizes her opportunity to oust Wei from the leadership of his pirate fleet. If his crew sway the other captains of the league to their cause, then their adventure will end with a short walk down the plank.
Desperate Colonials - Session 9: Indifference of the Void
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In this month’s episode from hell, an unlikely group of our Desperados is formed to siphon some gas and discover a mystery within a blue nebula.
Desperate Colonials - Session 8: Above and Beyond
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The Desperados finally scramble aboard their newly fixed free merchant ship to slip the surly bonds of Shar and touch the distorted blue of freedom.
Desperate Colonials - Session 7: the Showdown in B*tchtown!
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The stage is set in the center of town for a showdown! In true western style, strap in because this episode is a long one - Patty and Sanatio were caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, now in line for their turn for an interrogation with a Magistrate of the Emperor. Can the rest of our Desperados help them escape before their destiny is foiled?
Eldritch Escape: The Ascension of Michael Smith - Episode 2
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We're taking a break from Desperate Colonials this month, but don't panic, baby dolls! We got you covered. Part 2 of the Ascension of Michael Smith is here with twice as many goofs and pop culture refences as last time! Desperate Colonials will resume next month!
Desperate Colonials - Session 6: The Train Job
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The heist is on! Jolene, Patty, Furin, and an oddjobber hired by Max take on the train while Sanatio schedules a rendevous at the SkyMall to negotiate with Cizek.
Desperate Colonials - Session 5: Big Trouble in Little Jailhouse
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Here’s the scoop - the psychic twins, undaunted by dark visions of the future, wager their destiny on a boxing match. Maxwell and Patty reflect on the nature of fame while they chart a path for their partnership, and Jolene stumbles into Red Star’s secret plans while making plans of her own.
Desperate Colonials - Session 4: Repair Roulette (Presented by Acorn Cola)
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With their journey set and a galaxy of opportunities before them, our adventurers' optimistic drive to save the world soon collides with the steely walls of pragmatism. Space travel, as it turns out, is really expensive.
Desperate Colonials - Session 3: The Desert of the False
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Two great perils lay in the way of our unlikely desperados: the desert of the mind, with its mirages and false shimmers; and the actual blistering desert, wild and unforgiving.
Desperate Colonials - Session 2: The End of the Line
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To the West, at the end of the world, is a path where only dead men walk, greedily guarding their secrets from prying eyes. Will our players find salvation or damnation upon their arrival?
Lazyslothrpg: The Great Big Nomventure
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This month we have a special Bony Minus run by our friend Kerby!
The Great BIG Nomventure!
A neurodivergent-accessible kids' RPG full of storytelling and adorable Nomnisaurs from the team that brought you Dungeons & Dinos.
Kickstarter link: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/nomnivoregames/the-great-big-nomventure
"Blippy Trance", "Overworld", "Porch Blues"
Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ (edited)
Desperate Colonials - Session 1: The Great Tree
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Welcome to Shar, the jewel of its system - the arboreal home to our new cast of characters and the plights they endure. Angels fall while a new Emperor ascends, and the world order of the Great Tree is shaken.
Eldritch Escape: The Ascension of Michael Smith - Episode 1
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In this month's episode, we take a brief interlude from our regularly scheduled programming (due to scheduling conflicts) to begin the ascension of Michael Smith.
Desperate Colonials - Session 0: The Zeroest Session of Them All
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Our new campaign has begun at last! The month, Sloth gives an intro to the setting and house rules for our new campaign while walking our players through character creation. Session 1 of Desperate Colonials will publish in July.
We would also like our audience to know that we got hacked last month - if you received any weird messages, links, or anything other than our monthly podcast episodes, please disregard them and delete them. That was not us! Our trained baby sloths are not capable of doing such things. Thank y'all...
Lazysloth's RPG: Monster of the Week Boney minis- Rocky Mountain Horror
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In a first for the podcast, this month, Shira steps in as the GM, and Sloth steps out as a player in a session of Monster of the Week! In the city of Butte, Montana, four strange members of a local police outfit investigate an even stranger disappearance in the quiet mountain town. In every game Shira has ever run, Sloth's character has died. Can she maintain her perfect record? Or will Sloth finally survive one of her shots?
Lazysloth's RPG: Paranoia boney minis - Friend Computer is omnipibus!
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Riding off the wave of bittersweet storytelling, this month, the Lazysloth pardcast brings you delusion, chaos, happiness pills, and most of all, Paranoia! Accept Friend Computer into your heart ̶o̶r̶ ̶e̶l̶s̶e̶ and embark on an important mission to raise morale with our Troubleshooters. This is all you may know - any further information would be considered treason.
Lazysloth's RPG: The Vanguard Session 45- Paradigm Shift
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The Vanquishers unite Major City against Paradigm and work to solve a mystery that began when they entered the very first time entered the Vanguard tower. Can our heroes overcome a man who has never know defeat or will they end up just another pile of dust in this final session of The Vanguard?
Lazysloth's RPG: The Vanguard Session 44- 3 out of 4 aint bad
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In this month's episode, the world's greatest threats begin to converge (and the inconveniences that are popping up are only making it worse)! Unfortunately, the strength they hoped to restore with the hot dogs they wished for was for naught, thanks to the guile of the Djinn (as expected). After braving some very spicy dogs, the Vanquishers must bust out of the Vault, finding themselves in even BIGGER trouble. Luckily, our heroes have a BIG solution - the threats may have tripled, but with a little bit of non-copyrighted morphing, the Vanquishers become...
Lazysloth's RPG: Vanguard Session 43-Raiders of the Desert Doors
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In this episode of the Vanguard, the Vanquishers continue to evade the Gatekeeper(s) in the Desert of Doors until they run into an unlikely...nozzle? They learn that their endeavor to save the world from Ohr and Tselel is not the first, and are able to secure a ride and an ally to find their door. However, what lies behind the threshold is no respite either, as they are faced with the dastardly dealmakers of the Vault
Lazysloth's RPG:Vanguard session 42- Death, The Multiverse, and Nothing
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Faced with so many impending crises, the Vanquishers decided to focus on ending the heat death of the Universe. Our heroes head back down the Russhole into the puppet dimension to see what's beyond the obsidian door.
Lazysloth's RPG: Vanguard session 41- The end(s) of the world as we know it
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In this month's episode, the Vanquishers face the end-of-the-world. And then another one. And then one last other end-of-the-world. Luckily, they do not face it alone. With the help of some old faces and some new, will our heroes be able to prevail against this triple threat? Or will they fall at the feet of their adversaries?
Lazysloth's RPG: Vanguard Session 40- It’s the End of the Muppetfluffing World!
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Things are looking desperate as Golden Boy unleashes his pent up fury on a divided team of Vanquishers while Stampede gets lost in a dimension of head trauma and googly eyes.
Lazysloth's RPG: Vanguard Session 39- The man at the edge of time
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The Vanquishers return to major city after their jaunt back in time. Did they save Russ and their timeline from Oblivion? Only one way to find out.
