Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens

Positive Discipline has been the book so many of us reach for since 1981, and now there’s a new edition. My guest Amber Traina, granddaughter of Dr. Jane Nelsen, worked alongside Jane on the revision and the new chapter on technology. We talk about why kind and firm sits at the heart of it and the difference between niceness and kindness. Amber shares the tech audit and why connection is what brings our teens to us when they mess up.

Find more info and show notes at: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-676-positive-discipline-today

Also, th...

It's that time of year... The grade portal shows a pile of missing assignments, and taking the phone away feels like the only leverage you have. In this solo show I start in that moment with a teen who's behind in school, then work outward through the intentional ecosystem. We look at how your house runs and how connected you and your teen are, then at what you make those grades mean. I cover mistaken goals, executive functioning, natural consequences, and when to get help.

For more info and show notes go to: https...

You can do everything right and someone in your life can still make it hard. In this episode, I talk with Amy Armstrong, LISW-S, founder of the Center for Family Resolution, about co-parenting boundaries and staying grounded when another person's reactivity pulls you off center.

Amy shares her own story of chronic conflict, why trying to understand a difficult person rarely brings the control we hope for, and her working definition of a boundary: what you are willing and able to do. We also talk about why doing more is often a fight-or-flight reaction, how to protect...

Dr. Stuart Slavin has spent decades studying what pressure does to young people, and what he found flips the usual conversation. When he cut class time and letter grades at a medical school, depression and anxiety dropped by 80% and board scores went up.

A few things from our conversation:

→ Teen mental health started declining long before smartphones
→ The average teen in his research sleeps six and a half hours
→ Maladaptive perfectionism is skyrocketing, in our kids and in us
→ "Pressure not to disappoint my parents" ranks higher than direct pressure from parents
→ Aim...

Three weeks ago I told you about the text I got in an Atlanta hotel room. Today I share what happened after I got home, what I tried, and what finally shifted. This is the third show in the series, and the one the others were building toward. We look at all four ecosystem questions at once, the narrative I didn't know I was holding, and the anchor word practice I still use. It's also the last time I'll tell this story.

For more info and show notes go to https://www.besproutable.com...

Every parent of a teen has asked some version of this: Is this normal teenage behavior, or is something actually wrong? This week I go under your teen's closed door, attitude, screens, and secrecy. What's driving all of it is belonging, significance, and the private logic your kiddo is writing in real time. I share four questions that tell you where the trouble actually lives, honest signs that it's more than a season, and a three-step practice you can use tonight.

For more show notes and info go to https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts...

I thought I knew everything about co-regulation and the nervous system when my daughter texted me from across the country to say she was dropping out. None of it was available to me. In this solo show I get into what happens when you flip your lid, why knowing better doesn't protect you, and the three things you can practice tonight so your body has the move loaded when the house isn't calm. This one starts with you, my friend. The teen years are REAL. You're going to appreciate this one.

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This week I'm sharing a conversation I had with Margot Bisnow, who interviewed more than 70 families raising wildly self-driven kids. She went looking for a formula and found something more ordinary. We get into how to tell a real passion from checking out, and what parents do in the moments after their kid fails. She also tells the story of biting her tongue when her son left college halfway through. If you're white-knuckling your teen's path, my friend, this one's for you.

Guest bio

Margot Machol Bisnow is the author of Raising...

I'm back from a couple weeks off and I'm fired up about the intentional ecosystem, the model I've been carrying around all summer. It's four layers, and you work them from the outside in: you, your relationship with your teen, your systems and routines, and the in-the-moment tools. This is my answer to the question I get more than any other, which is I know what I'm supposed to do, so why isn't it working? The school year is a real reset. Come listen, my friend.

For more info and show notes go to...

Even if you don't run a business, you're running something. In this conversation with business coach Trish Gower, we talk about what happens when your nervous system is driving the car. Over-functioning, boundaries that actually hold, the mental load, and why "I don't have time" is usually a story we tell ourselves. If you're a parent of teens who's exhausted from holding it all together, this one's for you. Come listen.

Guest bio:
Trish Gower is the founder of Messy Minded Magic and a business coach for midlife women who are done being everything to everyone...

Our kids are watching how we talk about our bodies, and they're deciding what that means about theirs. In this episode I sit down with health and wellness coach Robynn Powers to talk about body image, food rules, and what gets handed down without us meaning to. We get into keeping food neutral, why restriction backfires with teens, and where to start if you feel like you've already blown it. Come listen. This one is tender and really useful.

Guest Bio

Robynn Powers is a health and wellness coach with a background in psychology and...

Parenting teens has a way of surfacing everything we've been avoiding in our marriage. This week I'm talking with Shilo Minor about what happens when the connection thins out and you start feeling more like roommates than partners. We get into fawning, self-abandonment, boundaries that actually hold, and why the inner work is worth doing even when you're the only one doing it. If you love your person and still feel alone in the middle of the teen years, come listen.

Guest bio:

Shilo Minor is the founder of Your Real Life Love Story and...

In this solo episode, I answer a question from a mom whose oldest is heading off to college across the country. How do you show up for your kid in the months before and after they launch? I talk through letting them practice freedom before they go, keeping routines and contributions in place, holding the both/and of excitement and sadness, and setting up communication that actually works. If you're sending a teen to college soon, this one's for you.

For more show notes got to https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-644-parenting-and-launching-your-teen/

This week I'm getting honest about being in my own season of crisis and what it's teaching me about the fawn response, that fourth survival instinct after fight, flight, and freeze. If you've ever walked on eggshells with your teen or someone else you love, or have struggled to hold a boundary because you're scared of losing the relationship, this one's for you. I share the Adlerian roots of people-pleasing and a grounding practice called Think Tree to help you come home to yourself. Press play.

Find more info and show notes at: https...

In part two of my conversation with parent coach Susan Notis, we move past the information about teen cannabis use and into what you can actually do about it. We get into regulating your own nervous system before you talk, communicating without slipping into lecture mode, and how to tell when a consequence is safe to let unfold versus when it's time to call in help. If your teen is using and you feel stuck, this one's for you.

Guest bio

Susan Notis is a certified parent coach and bestselling co-author of The Perfectly Imperfect...

I loved this convo! My guest, Diane Sorenson shares what shifts when you stop performing motherhood and start treating it as a lifelong relationship. We talk boundaries as an expression of your truth, why holding a firm line is connection rather than its opposite, and how to stay steady when your teen is furious with you. If you've ever folded to make the bad feeling go away, press play.

Guest bio: Diane Sorensen has spent over 30 years working with kids and families. A former teacher turned boundary and empowerment coach, she hosts the Chaos to Connection Podcast...

What if the way we treat our babies and teenagers could actually predict whether they grow up peaceful or violent? In this episode, I welcome back Lori Petro to dig into the buried research of Dr. James Prescott, the pull of obedience culture, and how shame around our kids' bodies and emotions shapes who they become. We get honest about parenting teens, sexual development, and choosing curiosity over control. It's messy, it's tender, and it left me hopeful. Come listen.

Guest bio: Lori Petro is a writer, educator, and child advocate, and the founder of Teach Through...

What if our teens are far more capable than our anxious culture lets us believe? (spoiler: they are) In this episode, I sit down with Lenore Skenazy to talk about raising independent, resilient teenagers in a world built on fear. We dig into why kids crave independence, how "worst-first thinking" keeps us stuck, and practical tools to help your teen practice real-world skills before they launch. If you're ready to trade control for trust, this conversation is for you.

Guest Bio: Lenore Skenazy is a cultural critic, longtime New York–based journalist, and TED mainstage speaker who sp...

We don't parent in a vacuum, my friend. Midlife and the teen years pile on the paperwork, the appointments, the mental load—and so many of us are drowning in reactive mode. In this episode, I sit down with organization expert Lisa Woodruff to talk about the invisible work of running a home, moving from reactive to proactive, and her game-changing Sunday Basket system. If you're a parent of teens craving calm and grounded systems, this conversation is for you. 🌱

Guest Bio: Lisa Woodruff is the founder and CEO of Organize 365 and host of the top-rated Organize 365 Podca...

Negotiation isn't a boardroom skill—it's a parenting skill, and every hard conversation with our teens is a training ground. In this episode, I talk with negotiation expert Atiya Qureshi about asking for what we need, managing our own emotional storms, and finding the relational middle ground between passive and aggressive. We dig into understanding interests over positions, the internal negotiation we have with ourselves first, and why being listened to opens our kids up to hearing us. Come learn alongside me.

Guest Bio: Attia Qureshi is the founder of Attia Qureshi Consulting and an adjunct at th...

If your teen's disrespect, eye rolls, and slammed doors have you feeling stuck, this solo episode is for you. I'm unpacking a game-changing reframe: your teen isn't being a problem, they're having a problem. Drawing on Positive Discipline and the Rudolf Dreikurs's Mistaken Goal Chart, I share why discouraged teens act out, how power struggles and revenge cycles trap us, and five practical moves to interrupt the pattern. Children do better when they feel better — even teens. Come listen, my friend.

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In this solo episode, I'm diving into the messy, beautiful work of parenting through transitions. Whether you're watching your kiddo move from elementary to middle school, middle to high school, or out into young adulthood, this season of parenting tweens and teens asks something new of us. I'll share three shifts that have changed everything for me: naming what's actually happening, seeing the kid in front of you, and holding tight to values while letting go of form.

For show notes and more info: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/ep-655-who-is-this-kid-the-transition-of-adolescence/

Raising a teenage boy today means navigating contradictory messages about who he's supposed to be — strong but soft, expressive but not too much. In this episode, I sit down with Don Campbell of Soul Fire Parenting to unpack what teen boys actually need from us: closeness, safe harbor, and parents who model vulnerability. We dig into the power-over parenting trap, the real cost of "tough love," and why repair matters more than getting every single moment right. Press play.

Guest Bio:

Don Campbell is the founder of Soul Fire Parenting and a master coach with ov...

If you've ever stood in your kitchen wondering if your teen's weed use is "just a phase," this episode is for you. I'm joined by parent coach Susan Norts to talk about teen cannabis dependency, why today's marijuana isn't what we grew up with, and how to stay grounded when fear takes over. We dig into nervous system regulation, honest communication, and the long game of leading our teens through change. Tune in—you don't have to navigate this alone.

Guest Bio: Susan Notis is a certified parent coach and bestselling co-author of The Perfectly Imperfect Family. Wi...

In this solo episode, I take you into my comments section, where a listener called my parenting content "snowflake." I use it as a doorway into what Positive Discipline actually looks like with tweens and teens — why kind AND firm isn't soft, why consequences don't build skills, and how curiosity under the iceberg shifts how we show up. If you're raising an adolescent and tired of the "kick in the butt" narrative, this episode is for you.

Find more info and show notes at: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/ eps-652-soft-teens-or-snowflake-parenting/

In this solo episode, I dig into what so many parents of teens wrestle with: rebuilding trust after your kid has hurt or scared you. I explore why hypervigilance is a trauma response and not a character flaw, the difference between earned trust and naive trust, why the body holds on even when our mind wants to move on, and how doing your own healing work matters as much as anything they do. Tender, real, and full of practical tools.

Bio: Casey O'Roarty, M.Ed., is a Positive Discipline Lead Trainer, parent coach, speaker...

Teen sleep struggles are real — and they're not about laziness or bad parenting. In this episode, I sit down with clinical psychologist and sleep medicine specialist Dr. Melissa Moore to unpack why adolescent sleep is so hard and what parents can actually do about it. We explore the circadian shift of adolescence, neurodivergent sleep challenges, and how to have conversations that build cooperation instead of conflict. If your teen's sleep schedule is driving you crazy, this one's for you.

Dr. Melissa Moore is a clinical psychologist board certified in behavioral sleep medicine. She works at the Sleep Ce...

If you've ever watched your teen spiral into negative thinking and felt completely helpless — or worse, realized your response made it worse — this episode is for you. I sat down with certified youth life coach Anna Kashner to talk about teen life coaching, how it's different from therapy, and what's actually happening in your teen's brain when they catastrophize. Anna is warm, practical, and deeply experienced, and she left me (and will leave you) with real tools you can use starting today. Don't miss this one.

GUEST BIO

Anna Kashner is a cert...

In this episode, I'm sitting down with the incredible Wendy Snyder of Fresh Start Family — and this conversation is good. We're talking about breaking painful generational cycles, the power of humility as a parenting superpower, and why releasing control actually works better in the teen years. Wendy shares her raw, honest journey from overwhelmed mom to leading educator, and we get into the real stuff: shame, nervous system patterns, and what a fresh start actually looks like when things have already gotten hard.

Guest Bio: Wendy Snyder is a certified positive parenting educator, family life coach, and fo...

If you've been feeling off lately (like me) — scattered, insecure, or like you've lost your footing — this episode is for you. In this solo show, I'm sharing what happened when I finally returned to my Soul Care practice after weeks away, and why intentional inner work is our most important foundation. I walk you through gratitude, affirmations, card pulls, and the mindset shifts that help me stay grounded as a parent and a person. This one is a reset. Come back to yourself.

Find more info and show notes at: https://www.besproutable.com/podc...

If you've ever wondered why your "good kid" seems fine on the outside but distant, perfectionistic, or quietly falling apart — this episode is for you. I sat down with Maggie Nick, licensed clinical social worker and trauma therapist, to talk about what she calls "good kid" patterns: the relational shame that forms when kids learn to hide their messy, real selves to stay lovable. We dig into the check engine lights parents miss, why reassurance backfires, and what kids actually need to feel safe enough to show up as they are. Don't miss this one.

Maggie Nick is...

Are you parenting from trust—or survival? In this episode I sit down with Debbie Simmons, mom of thirteen and leadership strategist, to explore the hidden defaults that hijack our parenting when pressure hits—control, silence, over-functioning, people pleasing. We talk about why being the "strong one" in your family might actually be costing you your health and your connection with your teen. Debbie shares her T.R.U.S.T. framework and we dig into how letting go of control opens the door to the relationship your teen actually needs from you. This one will shift something in you...

If you've ever promised yourself you'd respond differently to your teen—and then found yourself right back in the same reactive loop—this episode is for you. I sat down with somatic educator and counselor Layne Burkette to explore why parenting teens is a physical experience, not just a mental one. We dig into how your own teenage wounds show up in your parenting today, and Layne guides us through several live somatic practices you can use right now. Your nervous system is the key to everything.

Layne Burkette is a counselor, somatic educator, yoga psychology and medi...

Money talk on a parenting podcast? Yes — because financial stress shows up in our relationships with our teens whether we acknowledge it or not. In this episode I sit down with financial planner Lori Atwood to explore why so many of us avoid looking at our finances, how that avoidance leaks into our parenting, and what we can actually do about it. We dig into allowance, buyer's remorse as a teaching tool, prioritizing when college costs feel crushing, and how to model a healthier relationship with money for our kids. This one is practical, honest, and long overdue.

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In this episode, I'm unpacking the unintended results of punishment, and why it isn't helpful with teenagers — and what actually is. We dig into the adolescent brain science behind why our kids make impulsive choices, why consequences are often just punishment in disguise, and how focusing on solutions builds the critical thinking skills our teens actually need. If you've ever wondered what to do instead of grounding, lecturing, or taking the phone away, this one's for you. Come listen and let's shift the mindset together.

Casey O'Roarty is a parent coach, positive discipline lead tr...

I'm diving deep into what happens when we release others—including our teens—to their own journeys. As parents, we hang on so tight, resisting what scares us, but what we resist persists. I'm sharing my own messy middle of personal growth work, walking through the five principles of Positive Discipline from a radically honest place about marriage, parenting teens, and the hardest truth: our wellbeing is an inside job. If you're navigating the push-pull of adolescence while doing your own inner work, this episode is for you.

Guest Bio: This is a solo episode with Casey O'Ro...

Feeling like you're living with a wildfire instead of just putting out fires with your teen? In this solo episode, I explore why traditional discipline approaches fail when relationships are ruptured, and introduce the concept of a "relationship reset" - an energetic cast that gives both you and your teen space to heal. Learn how disengaging with love (not indifference) can restore influence, rebuild trust, and create the connection your struggling teen desperately needs.

This is a solo episode with Casey O'Roarty, parent educator, Positive Discipline lead trainer, and host of the Joyful Courage podcast.

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In this powerful conversation, I sit down with psychotherapist and Positive Discipline expert Alyson Schafer to explore how we can support our teens through today's turbulent political climate. We discuss Alfred Adler's vision for raising cooperative citizens, reading our kids' stress signals, using curiosity over lectures, and helping teens move from doom-scrolling to meaningful action. If you're struggling to hold space for your teen's big feelings about current events while maintaining hope for the future, this episode is essential listening.

Guest Bio: Alyson Schafer is a psychotherapist, bestselling author, and one of the leading voices in Positive...

I recently sat down with Kevin Dahill-Fuchel to explore what's really happening with teens' mental health today and why traditional models aren't enough. We discussed the crisis of isolation among adolescents, how schools can become centers of healing, and the critical importance of adults modeling healthy relationships. Kevin shares powerful insights about meeting kids where they are, making suicide a speakable word, and why staying present with our teens—even when they push us away—matters more than ever. If you're wondering how to support your teen's mental health while managing your own overwhelm, this conversation offers hope and prac...

I sat down with Dr. Jared Cooney Horvath, a neuroscientist who's worked with over 1,000 schools globally, and what he shared about educational technology absolutely validates what so many of us have been feeling. After reviewing six decades of research, Jared reveals how ed tech actually undermines our kids' learning—and why COVID didn't change that. Dr. Horvath earned his doctorate from University of Melbourne and master's from Harvard, and he breaks down the neuroscience of why analog learning beats digital every time. If you've felt uneasy about your teen's screen-based schoolwork, this conversation will empower you to push back. Li...