The Gerard Cosloy Radio Hour (That Feels Like Two Hours)
Because it's really two hours long. Sometimes even longer. How long a musical journey would you go on without having replaced the windshield blades?
10/28/26 Show 335 : Halloween Cancelled In Order To Fully Focus On Eviscerating Blake Griffin
I try not to get too personal in this space but I will admit this has been an especially difficult week for me. With so much else in the world falling apart, I was tasked with watching the debut of Blake Griffinâs new pseudo âWeekend Updateâ vehicle, âThe Stepback With Blake Griffinâ, and after losing however many precious brain cells I had left, I can say the program really should be called âThe (Career) Setback With Blake Griffin (And Whatever Handlers Thought They Could Make Him As Ubiquitous As John Cena)â. Is it the worst chat show ever hosted by a...
10/21/26 Show 334 : Computers Don't Blunder (But Blenders Don't Compute
itâs either a sad commentary on my particular obsessions or how ferociously predictable I am that nearly a half dozen of you took the time to forward Wattieâs recent Instagram cattle call for a new guitarist for The Exploited. Nearly all of these unsolicited messages included sneering suggestions that I was âthe right guy for the jobâ and yeah, Iâll admit, I do tick off nearly every box (i wasnât planning on moving back to the UK , but had this opportunity presented itself in the early 2000âs, I probably would not have left). I have a passport...
10/14/25 Show 333 : YOU CANNOT WITHSTAND THE WORLD'S STRONGEST SLAM
I have nothing but respect and admiration for those of you who routinely challenge the status quo (as opposed to challenging The Status Quo, who really deserve to enjoy a quiet retirement). All of that said, I don't think your efforts always compare favorably to Mark Henry's one-man attempt to stop the US Military Industrial Complex.Â
This might sound like an unfair expectation (and it really is), but I'm pretty keen to give us something to aspire to.
10/07/26 Show 332 : I've Been To The Other Side (And The Food Is Terrible)
I'm presuming you've all seen the recent Fox News testimony of the young chap whom during an 18 day coma, claims he saw Jesus Christ. While most historians agree that Christ closely resembled Kenny Loggins or Jared Leto, Gabe Poirot instead insists that J.C. took on a far more ripped visage (say, Roman Reigns).Â
Poirot is being widely mocked for sharing these thoughts and I am not without sympathy. I recently had a beyond-and-back experience of my own in which i envisioned an SNL musical performance, not by the universally lauded Turnstile, but instead the 1-800-Kars-4-Ki...
09/30/26 Show 331 : Where's Your God(smack) Now?
The unfortunate, inexcusable events just a stone's throw from the EVR studios --- in which a longtime proprietor of a cookbook store was arrested after tangling with the security team supervising the endless queue for the Amex Harry Styles pop-up --- have completely overshadowed a recent harrowing experience of my own.Â
There's been no media coverage to date of my being physically ejected from a Godsmack show for making fun of the band's merch table. I understand why the other story is considered newsworthy (and an egregious assault on a community pillar), but let me remind you al...
09/23/26 Show 330 : 101 With A Bullet
spoiler alert or preemptive strike? Take your pick but I have it very good authority from my sources at The Paper of Record that the NY Timesâ ongoing âThe 100 Best TV Shows of The 21st Centuryâ will not include âShasta McNastyâ.Â
It seems the Times has chosen to snub this beloved comedy because it premiered in August of 1999, however, as any MCNASTY enthusiast already knows, the program ran until the spring of 2000, thus making making these claims of ineligibility specious at best. And you have no fucking idea just how long Iâve been waiting to type âspecious...
09/16/29 Show 329 : You Can't Spell "Complicity" Without "Myopic"
this weekâs program was originally meant to be a two-hour analysis of the 2019 motion picture âYesterdayâ in which a young musician is hit by a bus and awakes in an alternate reality where Anal Cunt never existed. Itâs a pretty sappy affair with an all-too-obvious idea and as youâve already guessed, our protagonist achieves vast fame performing Seth Putnamâs compositions as if they were his own. Said film also features singer-songwriter Ed Sheeran playing himself (very brave stretch) and it seems for that reason station management has forced me to re-record the entire episode. I donât reall...
09/09/26 Show 328 : Pledge Allegiance To Xtract One & eConnect
weâre on the precipice of marking the 25th anniversary of a horrible event that would usher in an unprecedented nĆ©-normal era of authoritarianism and mass surveillance. EVR management would have you believe the webcam to the stationâs on-air booth is currently off-line due to âtechnical issuesâ but could the reason really be theyâre afraid of the truth coming out : that when the camera is turned to first avenue, passers-by have their likenesses captured and sent directly to Planatir, Leidos,James Dolan and somewhat inexplicably, guitarist Warren Haynes. Perhaps so he and Dolan can have something else...
09/02/26 Show 327 : That Horse That You Can't Ride
thereâs a gushy piece in todayâs Guardian about a teenager who took to IG to document his attempts to listen to one Merzbow album each day. Itâs a fun article and the fella in question seems nice and inquisitive enough, except WHAT THE FUCK, this twerp STOLE MY IDEA.  Long before some of you little shits were even conceived, i took to rec.music.moebandy to chronicle my efforts to listen to and rank the entire Moe Bandy discography. Where was my goddamn parade?  Some kid made it all the way thru âAkasha Gulvaâ? Big whoop, where were you...
08/26/26 Show 326 : The Final Breckin-ing
I usually try to stay away from promotional gimmickry on the program â I am sure youâll agree between the musical selections and my effervescent commentary, no such pandering is required to maintain a vast audience. However, under considerable pressure from EVR management, this week I have been tasked with giving away 2 tickets to the American Film Instituteâs Lifetime Achievement Award ceremonies honoring Breckin Meyer. Yeah, I know, âsecond prize is four ticketsâ, I use that line every Levitation Festival. But really, in this instance, second prize really _is_ four tickets. And third prize is Breckin Meyer (youâll have to supply...
08/19/26 Show 325 : Sound & Furby Signifying Nothing
I know what you're saying, "that is one ugly ass Furby". In fact, it's a FUGGLER, and I know this because I tried to attend this weekend's Sound & Furby Festival and was asked to leave because they found the FUGGLER in my backpack. It's a Furby-only festival and apparently there are very strict rules about allowing Fugglers on to the festival grounds.Â
Clearly, the event promoters are just another case of people who pay lip service to things like inclusion but when push comes to shove, protecting the Furby IP takes precedence. I'll use this disrespect to f...
08/12/26 Show 324 : Everybody's Got A Hungry Heart (Punch Story)
earlier this week I was looking up an old Popular Mechanics story about a global oxide shortage (hoping for some insights as to why Cassette Store Day is no longer a thing â I mean, there could be no other reason, right) and instead saw a report that despite a US ban on biological weapons, the CIA developed a HEART ATTACK GUN made from shellfish toxin.Â
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 Iâm no expert on this stuff, but it seems it would have more sense for the CIA to simply take Americanâs enemies to dinner at Red Lobster and let nature do...
08/05/26 Show 323 : This Program Is 75-80% Finished
thereâs so many things I deeply appreciate about Blabbermouth.com but thereâs no feature on the site nearly as crucial as their devotion to updating us with detailed progress reports such as these. If Sully from Godsmackâs spoken word album is â70 percent doneâ, we can wait with bated breath for the news down the line that at some point heâll be â80 percent doneâ. If youâre spending today mourning the end of yet another music news site, ask yourself if they really did enough to keep you informed about how close Michael Schenk...
07.29.26 Show 322 : We're All NewsMaxxing (Whether We Want To Or Not)
While some of my friends are rightfully taking exception this morning to the announcement of NewsMax and Metaâs âcontent partnershipâ, I am very sorry to say Iâm instead firmly focused on the misdeeds of the latter concern. To wit, the IG algorithm serving me a relentless, mind-numbing spate of clips from âThe Nannyâ (CBS, 1993-1999). While my friends are graced with a never-ending array of Sopranos, Breaking Bad and death match wrestling videos, I get nothing but a steady diet of Fran Drescher. I donât know if thereâs anything that can be done about this (at the very leas...
07/22/26 Show 321 : What Goes Up Must Come Down (Unless It Stays Up)
thereâs been a succession of counter-cultural figures whose passings have been confirmed over the past week, and as always it is terribly important that you take great pains to publicly express that you never liked their work (anyway), or even better, you were at one time or another, an acolyte, yet thru growth and maturity have since come to understand their work was shit and you presently disavow it. Because we desperately need such affirmations from persons we donât know, had no relationship(s) to the deceased and all of our lives are richer knowing about the...
07/15/26 Show 320 : All Moments Are Special, But Some are MORE Special
in honor of todayâs crucial England v Argentina tilt, Iâd planned on playing The Special Momentsâ 2009 opus, âEric : The Falklands Folliesâ from start to finish , however at the very last moment the licensing dept. rang and said permission had been denied. It seems Baz and Reg Lumley are attending the match in Atlanta today and regardless of which side wins, they intend to lead the stadium in a full throated singalong of âThey Dropped A Bomb (On Me)â and would prefer not to have this occasion undermined (usurped, most likely) by this program. Which is fair enough, the Lum...
07/08/26 Show 319 : Bringing Home The (Rage) Bait)
I have to confess, until very recently I was not fully aware of the phenomenon commonly referred to as "rage bait". Live Bait, Squirrel Bait, Live Skullâs 1985 masterpiece âBringing Home The Baitâ, sure, rage bait, maybe not. But that was before I saw countless "Best American Band Ever" lists posted on social media over the past week and upon learning The Cheater Slicks didn't crack the top ten in any of them, well, yeah, I was genuinely enraged.
All of that said, I'm not gonna be on the outside looking in with this whole...
07/01/26 Show 318 : Down In Front (Unless The Sign Has Writing On Both Sides)
life is full of crushing disappointments.Â
Turn up for early for the âAmerica 250â party, only to learn Danny Tantrumâs set has been cancelled (âtechnical issuesâ, yeah, right) . You spend nearly 3 entire minutes making a âFire (David) Stearnsâ sign and youâre kicked out of Citi Field by Steve Cohenâs goon squad (âthe sign is not big enoughâ, ok, fair enough). Jump headfirst into the modern print-zine revival and get sentenced to 100 years in prison (âthese were not printed by Conde Nastâ â and where did it say otherwise?).Â
 Maybe âdisappointingâ is putting it mildly. Disheartening, discouraging, infuri...
06/24/26 Show 317 : TRY NOT TO OD ON ALL THE IMPACTFUL RELEVANCE
I donât know if youâre like me but I suspect you might be â looking on in abject horror as the entire internet persists in curb-stomping an individual who had the temerity to declare themselves, âthe most relevant and impactful music critic of my â and any â generationâ. Yeah, I know, more impactful than Gary Bushell? More relevant than Luke Winkie? Not bloody likely, however what sort of world are we living in where self-styled pundits arenât allowed to take great pride in their work? Were I to publicly insist that this program was the most relevant and impactf...
06/17/26 Show 316 : This One's For Andrea Bargani
in commemoration of the New York Knicksâ stunning dispatch of the San Antonio Spurs last week, I attempted to fashion an infographic for this weekâs show that displayed a new JD & The Straight Shot album designed in the style of Kurt Vileâs âPhiladelphiaâs Been Good To Meâ (admittedly, âBeing Charles Dolanâs Son Has Been Good To Meâ doesnât roll off the tongue nearly as well). My Photoshop skills are beyond primitive, so like so many other lazy motherfuckers, I resorted to AI. And thatâs when the shit hit the (w)fan â not only was I roundly shamed for...
06/10/26 Show 315 : At The (Not Very Good) Movies
I dunno about YOU LOT but in these troubled, dumber than dumb fuck times I need all the distractions I can get. Preparations for this week's episode were slightly dented by my spending most of the past several days pouring over footage from a pair of 2026 celluloid achievements, to wit, Lifetime's "Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery" (with an incredible star turn from 14 year NBA vet turned podcasting sensation Matt Barnes) and Sword Of The Spirit Publishing's "Beauty & The Atheist"*, the latest epic from author/director Donald James Parker (of "Gramps Goes To College" infamy). It does seem a bit...
06/03/26 Show 314 : OR MAYBE JUST CALL IT "P-GRIND"
nary a day passes when I am not filled with INCANDESCENT rage at some influenza-peddler sharing their deep thoughts about some imaginary micro genre or other. Hyper-slop. sketchers-gaze. Itâs all too much for any sensible, learned person (or if you prefer, me) to endure.Â
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 But then it hit me â why allow these grifters and dumbfucks to dominate the discussion? Whatâs stopping me â with my wealth of experience in deceiving the general public and my nearly unmatched avarice and commitment to self-interest, from doing likewise and reaping the vast rewards on offer?
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 And with that, this...
05/27/26 Show 313 : Rather See You Dead (Than Celebrate A 6th Anniversary With Wool On Your Head)
today marks the 6th anniversary of this programâs launch - when it all began in those scary days of 2020, I never wouldâve imagined it would turn into the most popular and acclaimed online radio show in the world. As it turns out, nothing of the sort would come to pass, however a lot of other terrible things DID come to pass and nearly every week feels like shaking off reality in order to enter THE DENIAL ZONE for two hours (the exceptions of course, being the weeks in which i am THIS CLOSE to passing out during...
05/20/26 Show 312 : Jingle Jangle, These Are Provocations 2 Strangle
Iâm sure youâve all read accounts of the diabolical 1-877-Kars-4-Kids commercials being banned from the airwaves in California due to their deceptive nature (ie. you cannot actually swap a kar for a kid, not lawfully anyway) and while this is very good news for the collective sanity of Golden State residents, i am afraid i have to ask â what , if anything, is the court system doing about JG FUCKING WENTWORTH? Fair enough, if you have a structured settlement and need-cash-now, I suppose there are worse options than dialing 1-877-CASH-NOW but there is no telling...
05/13/26 Show 311 : TIMBERRR
during storms last week, a huge portion of a neighborâs even bigger tree came down in my front yard  and for several days there was no effort to sort out the damage. Friends suggested I ring 311, which seemed a little presumptuous â for starters, thereâs nothing in their background to suggest theyâre any good at providing municipal services, and secondly, itâs two thousand twenty six ffs, shouldnât I be calling the Nick Hexum Quintet, instead?Â
As it turns out â311â is the number we ring here in Austin for non-emergency services. And then, this weekâs episode is...
05/06/26 Show 310 : What's The Story, They've Totally Fucked Up Corrie
this weekâs show tackles one of the more discouraging developments in recent times, mainly the ill-advised decision on the part of âCoronation Streetâ writers to wrap up 4 (ok, 5 but i really DGAF about Jodie) major storylines simultaneously. I donât think i am exaggerating when i say this is the worst thing that has ever happened. Did someone mishear a colleague singing the praises of Anti-Cimex and thought to themselves, âyeah, what a great idea, letâs make the entire thing one fucking huge anti-climax?â Because thatâs the only reasonable explanation I can come up with. FUCK .
04/29/26 Show 309 : Kataloging Kallax Katastrophes
i did my best to make this week's program special but i must confess, it was very difficult finding the time to select the music and make proper notes now that I have become engulfed in the burgeoning industry that is posting-photos-of-kollapsed-kallax-shelves. You all know how obsessed I am with monetizing these accounts and there's an endless demand for photos of kollapsing kallax. Were it not for issues with the payment processing companies (both those founded by Peter Thiel and those founded by people who aspire to be Peter Thiel), we'd already have a subscription model ala Only Fans i...
04/22/26 Show 308 : It's Still Realicide To Me, Damn It
It's still Realicide To Me, Damn It. Only Death is Realicide. Is it Realicide or Is It Memorex? Is it Realicide or is it Desenex?Â
Anti-Cimex > Anti Fungal. Ludwig van Beethoven > âBeethovenâ (1992, dir - Brian Levant) > âBeethovenâs 2ndâ (1993, dir - Rod Daniel) > âBeethovenâs 3rdâ (2000 dir - David Mackey Evans) > Camper Van Beethoven. Enjoy this week's show, it's later than you think. Enjoy yourself, shirts from Primark are often prone to shrink. Â
04/15/26 Show 307 : No Taxation Without Defenestration
with tax returns coming due today in the United States, Iâm sadly obliged to reflect upon the 2010 flight undertaken by former Billy Eli Band bassist Andrew Joseph Stack III , who crashed his single engine Piper Dakota aircraft into the Austin TX offices of the Internal Revenue Service. Prior to this act of domestic terrorism, Stack could occasionally be seen maintaining the low end for the Eli Band at South Congressâ late, not so lamented Trophyâs, a bar one my dear friends described back in the era as a nightspot where shoe fights were not uncommon.Â
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 Wheth...
04/08/26 Show 306 : They Can't All Be Denny McLain At The Organ
this weekâs program concerns a matter that has utterly captivated music media the past several weeks, namely the debut album from aspiring cellist / 13 year NBA veteran PG Jason âWhite Chocolateâ Williams. Now, I know what some of you are saying. Heâs a total clown. He cannot play the cello for shit. He sucked on defense. All of these things are undeniable, however as I consider Williamsâ earnest musical attempts (aided in no small part by the International Anthem players), I think we need to keep an open mind and stay focused on the single most important factor here â m...
04/01/26 Show 305 : Nonstop To Nowhere
over the past couple of years I have thoroughly enjoyed my association with East Village Radio, however this glorious run has come to a conclusion as Iâve accepted a very lucrative offer to join the on-air staff at Siriusâ XMU. While Iâll not have nearly the same sort of creative control afforded by EVRâs rather lax management, I am absolutely convinced youâre GONNA LOVE âThe Tame Impala Hour That Feels Like 9 or Ten Hoursâ. Â
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 There is a slight issue in that the negotiations were only conducted via email and I still have no idea if itâs pro...
03/25/26 Show 304 : Upon Careful Reflection, All Songs Are Equally Great
so I was doing this silly interview with a UK newspaper and they were asking annoying questions like âwhatâs your favorite karaoke song?â (Paul Anka, âHaving My Babyâ), and âwhich song would be played for your torture at Camp X-Ray?â (Paul Anka, âHaving My Babyâ) and one of the click-baity Qâs was, âname a classic you donât think has aged particularly well?â Off the top of my head, the only thing I could come up with was the Vatican Commandosâ, âHousewives On Valiumâ. Itâs unkind to housewives, houses, wives and valium (in that order) and frankly, I think the lyrics are...
03/18/26 Show 303 : The Party's Over (But To Be Fair, It Wasn't Much Of A Party)
People sometimes* ask, "how do you kill a golden goose?" Well, if you are the organizers of central texas' annual music/film/tech trade fair, there's more than one way to exterminate your gold-egg laying friend (besides, you know, drowning, strangulation, forgetting to buy goose chow). The gradual decimation of the musical portion was a start, but the less gradual cozying up to the military industry, playing footsie with a.i. purveyors-of-death, harassment of non-affiliated events, etc. all played a part (to say nothing of always going head to head with the Austin Rodeo, meaning Everclear were already booked). It...
03/11/26 Show 302 : Also Just Found Out Puddle Of Mudd Are A Different Band
much as i wouldâve loved to devote this weekâs program to previewing all the hot stuff planned for Planatirâs SXSW showcase (which, unlike Shawn Carpetbaggerâs much vaunted INFOWARS showcases, might actually exist) , thereâs a slightly more urgent issue weighing upon us. Or me, anyway.Â
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 While thereâs no shortage of horrible ideas on the Record Store Day docket each April, what have we as a society done to deserve an All-Star Salute to the Impotent Sea Snakesâ âToo Cool For RockânâRollâ? Yes, I know, weâve actually done quite a bit, but since dodging acc...
03/04/26 Show 301 : Blood, Sweat And Undrinkable Beers
aside from the obvious (THIS FIFTH SEASON OF âINDUSTRYâ IS TERRIBLE), you have no idea how much self-control was required not to type âitâs like equity punk never happenedâ. But here we are, Iâve typed it, Iâve got no self control and and if you invested in this dorkâs operation, youâve likely got no money. While we patiently stalk his Linkedin account awaiting the next great pivot, hereâs 2 hours + of stuff and old and new to dive into while contemplating the failed merger of Brewdog and Brew Ha Ha Productions (see, now you no longer have to w...
02/25/26 Show 300 : In Lieur of Flowers, Please Send Cash
in honor of this programâs 300th episode, several of my devoted listeners pooled together cash from their paper routes and lemonade stands to purchase congratulatory Cameo calls from persons commonly associated with the number 300. Sadly, thespian powerhouse Gerard Butler (fig 1) turned down the gig saying he couldnât get into the character. Widely decorated pro bowler and DX acolyte Pete Weber also blew us off, claiming the provided script was too sexually explicit. If this wasnât discouraging enough, how fucking crazy it is that Cameoâs Larry Graham isnât on Cameo? AT LEAST THE CAKE WAS GREAT  and...
02/18/26 Show 299 : Incapable Of Avoiding Processed Feuds
Needles to say, I'm confused how an accredited fitness maven/administration simp like Triple H got cut out of the intense training session shown above, but OTOH the room doesn't look very big. Maybe your sweat lodge is more spacious, I really don't know. I had a bunch of good stories about Richard Simmons from my former lawyer, but I'm sworn to secrecy (mostly because I'd asked him to arrange a meeting with Russell Simmons and he misunderstood).Â
I'm so happy with this week's episode, I thought about saving it for #300, but upon careful consideration it would b...
02/11/26 Show 298 : Space(hog) Is The Place (Where You Need To Be Very Careful)
good morning. I am sure you are all as mortified as I am by news reports of someone claiming to be a former member of Spacehog sending explicit, unsolicited pics of himself to persons whoâve mentioned Spacehog on their timelines.
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 For starters, just because there are very few people who know or care enough about Spacehog to do so does not make these actions any less disturbing. Since our authorities are too consumed this morning with shutting down the airspace over El Paso, itâs up to me to (heroically) sound-the-fucking-alarm.
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 If you or your l...
02/04/26 Show 297 : Welcome To The Complicity Olympics
Last Friday's National Shutdown here in the USA raised a number of question that may or may not be answered in this week's program. For starters, it is a (slight) shame none of the organizers saw fit to credit retired MLB veteran Derek Bell who popularized the phrase "Operation Shutdown" some 24 years ago. While there's little in Bell's resume to indicate he'd be an effective ally for this particular movement, it would only have been POLITE to reach out to him>Â
On a somewhat grander scale, last week's conversations had me wondering (seriously) can any of us go...
01/28/26 Show 296 : Garden State Of Mind (Your Own Fucking Business)
with last weekâs passing of longtime New Jersey cable fixture Florio Vivino aka Uncle Floyd, thereâs been much said about Vivinoâs comedic chops, his many celebrity patrons (including but not limited to David Bowie and Howard Stern) and the countless appearances by iconic musicians including but not limited to Adrenalin OD, Rupert Holmes, NRBQ and Blue Oyster Cult. Comparatively little has been written about the two appearances by Genöcide (featuring the late Bobby Ebz) and even less about the stylistic transitions that took place between said appearances (see above).Â
Given the rather te...
