The Cavalry
Each week comedians Johnny Beehner and Andrew Sleighter rehash situations where they were outnumbered, voted down or dismissed and look to each other for backup.
"I'm A Big Boy"
Andrew needs backup that product placement in movies and tv shows backfires. Johnny needs backup that there should be five outs and five inning games in baseball.
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"Play The Hits"
Andrew needs backup that health insurance bills should come in different envelopes than the rest of the junk mail they send. Johnny needs backup that movies should go away for a year after they leave theaters before they go to streaming.
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"It's One... Two... Then Something Stuck Up Your"
Andrew needs backup that a line doesn't start until you're no longer walking full speed. Johnny needs backup that scratch off tickets are illegitimate gifts. Enjoy!
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"Because We Have To Have A Topic"
Andrew needs backup that you should be able sue the owners of AI social media accounts who steal material. Johnny needs backup that bloody Mary's don't need all the garnishes. Enjoy!
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"They Must Need Printer Paper"
Johnny needs backup that they should get rid of divisions in pro sports. Andrew needs backup that children's menu's should also include smaller versions of everything else on the menu. Enjoy!
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"Give Me A New Phone Now"
Andrew needs backup on how to handle Tooth Fairy skepticism. Johnny needs backup that it's better to just watch sports at home.
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Episode 333
Andrew needs backup that chefs don't need to be punk-rock. Johnny needs backup that if you have an animal in your movie it has to be a real animal.
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"Mango Jangos"
Johnny's mad because he didn't think of the Savannah Bananas first. Johnny needs backup that sports are better when the players are worse. Andrew needs backup that cops are becoming too reliant on solving crimes because they're caught on camera. Enjoy!
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"There's Even More Face!"
Johnny needs backup that political candidates should be hooked up to lie detector tests during debates. Andrew needs backup whether or not a guy looks good without his beard is just dependent on if he's handsome.
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"This Is A Reputable Trailer Park"
Johnny needs backup that maids don't need to clean rooms during your stay. Andrew needs backup that there should be a secondary, lighter internet that works when you have bad service.
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"There Must Be Bacteria In My Hummus!"
Andrew needs backup that only healthy people notice when their food is contaminated. Johnny needs backup that you shouldn't ruin stories with meaningless questions.
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"Do I Sign The Wall Now?"
Andrew needs backup that travel size toiletries are too small. Johnny needs backup that you don't need to sing along to every song at a concert. Enjoy!
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"We're Down To One Wheel"
Andrew needs backup that sports owners shouldn't be elected to the hall of fame. Johnny needs back up that superhero movies don't need to be so complicated. Enjoy!
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"Sure... Sure..."
Andrew needs backup that Americans aren't actually that loud. Johnny needs backup that it's ok to wear sneakers with a suit. Enjoy!
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"You Could Be A Chewer"
Andrew needs backup that you can just leave forms blank if you want. Johnny needs backup that you can sleep in as late as you want on vacation.
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"How Much Money Are You Gonna Sink Into Your Pogo Stick?"
Johnny needs backup that you Disneyland prices should be income based. Andrew needs backup that the Oscars needs a best "Kids Movie" category instead of best "Animated Film" category.
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"If You Start A Fire, And Then Put It Out, No One's Impressed"
Andrew needs backup that he needs credit for dressing casual. Johnny needs backup that we need to get rid of offsides in soccer.
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"Quick Think Of More Soccer Names"
It's a World Cup episode! Johnny needs backup that penalty kicks are a dumb way to decide World Cup matches. Andrew needs backup that the coaches for World Cup teams should have to be from the country that they're coaching.
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"Matching Gary Jerseys"
Andrew needs backup that government run public restrooms should never be closed. Johnny needs backup that if the catcher catches a foul tip it should be an out no matter what the count is. Enjoy!
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"We Don't Like To Get Political"
Andrew needs backup that the angsty chefs need to take it down a notch. Johnny needs backup that there needs to be more rules when it comes to the marketing of horror movies. Enjoy!
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"Rules Were Made To Be Broken"
Johnny needs backup that there shouldn't be rule changes in sports or there should be. Andrew needs backup that there should be two categories of kids movies... Kids movies that are good for kids and kids movies that are made for adults that kids actually hate. Enjoy!
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"I Love My Kids More Than Anything, But..."
Johnny needs backup that movie theaters should tell you what time the actual movie starts. Andrew needs backup that couples shouldn't fight in public on vacation.
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"I'm Sick, But I'm Starving"
Andrew needs backup that cemeteries are a waste and we should get rid of them. Johnny needs backup that landscaping is a scam. Enjoy!
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"No Male Book Clubs"
Andrew needs backup to never worry about trends. Johnny needs backup that cargo shorts are great actually. Remember to subscribe to the Patreon for post-show banter!
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"Guess Who Came Back Crawling"
Johnny needs backup on ending the potluck. Andrew needs backup that we need to end advertising food at restaurants as the basic elements of food.
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"Big News Around Here.. Got An Oil Change"
Andrew needs backup that all fountain drinks should cost the same amount regardless of size. Johnny needs backup that we need government regulation on Youtube comments. Enjoy!
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"Yarrrr Matey"
Andrew needs backup that we should ban all prediction markets. Johnny needs backup that it's fine to not have a bed frame or box spring actually. Enjoy!
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"No Consent! No Consent!"
Andrew needs backup that it's ok to make the middle and aisle seat get up when you have to use the bathroom. Johnny needs backup that we should eliminate voice mail. Enjoy!
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"That's Not 311"
Andrew makes a giant music error right off the top! Football season can't come back quick enough. Then Andrew needs backup that flight attendants shouldn't sell credit cards if the flight has been delayed. Johnny needs backup that we know too much about celebrities.
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"My Daughter Could Be Pissing In That Bush"
Andrew needs backup that the iPads with the trivia games and advertisements hanging in the back of headrests in Ubers should be banned. Johnny needs backup that celebrities shouldn't use nicknames when talking about other celebrities.
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"Here's Your Silverware Back"
Johnny needs backup that limited series television should just be movies. Andrew needs backup that 20 percent is the standard tip in perpetuity.
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"Whatever I Ate Gets A Bad Wrap"
Andrew needs backup that we don't need our kids flying to play youth sports. Johnny needs backup that there should be frequent flier miles for driving. Enjoy!
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"Just Stick A Penny In There"
Andrew needs backup that mechanics have a shady reputation because they're trying to hard to prove they're not shady. Johnny needs backup that he's not gonna borrow a snow blower from his neighbors. Enjoy!
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"I Didn't Know You Were Leashed"
Andrew needs backup that it's dumb to check the weather back home when you're on vacation. Johnny needs backup that it's obvious Christmas is the best holiday.
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"The Back Bottom Part"
We ask if Johnny will ever be able to cancel his Shinesty subscription... Then Johnny needs backup that it's not a symptom of having many siblings growing up, he just enjoys eating fast. Andrew needs backup that restaurants with a view are always worse than restaurants without a view. Enjoy!
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"OK I'm Ready To Go Where Are My Beers I'm Taking?"
Johnny needs backup that you should be able to take home beverages you bring to a party that don't get consumed. Andrew needs backup that everyone should vote on what the state of the union actually is before the President gives the State of the Union address, and then the President should have to respond to that vote.
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"Doggie's At Target"
Andrew needs backup that your Dominos account doesn't need more security than pharmacies. Johnny needs backup that it shouldn't be legal to buy old cop cars and drive them around.
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"They Just Kept Popping Up!"
Johnny needs backup that people who claim they aren't spoiling a show or movie, but just want to tell you their opinion about it, are still spoiling the show or movie. Andrew needs backup that picky eaters after the age of four can no longer eliminate menu items that they used to like. Enjoy!
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"You're Dying At The Same Part Every Time"
Johnny needs backup that social media sites should let you pay to reset your algorithm. Andrew needs backup that you don't need to put the disclaimers that the world is awful before your promotional posts. Enjoy!
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Episode 300!
It's the 300th episode of The Cavalry! So many great memories to share. But who has time because we need backup! Andrew needs backup that a TV show can't have more seasons than years it's been on the air. Johnny needs backup that turtlenecks suck. Enjoy! And thanks for listening to all 300 episodes and never missing one.
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