A Scary Home Companion

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This is a hard boiled noir mystery.

It's an odd couple cop story,

It's the tale of a brutal serial killer with a ruthless agenda

Also, and this is a key detail... its set in a dark city where everyone is anthropomorphic ice creams.

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It's a typical Friday night, and a group of young people are sneaking out into the night to raise a little mischief. But this is no ordinary town, and these are no ordinary young people. Join the most horrific monsters you can imagine in this wholesome tale of innocence, exploration, and young love.

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Floyd Halliday, better known as the Splattermask, has been a serial killer and one-man killsquad for decades. He is considered the world's most deadly senior citizen. When he is forcibly retired, he decides to make a big mess. The killer who took his old job is sent to clean it up, and take him out.

If you're geeking out for more Danny, check out  Thicker Than Water, an audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. Its available for f...

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Janice has been a bad, bad girl. She likes to play with hammers, and people who can't defend themselves. She has her own little gang of thugs, who also carry hammers.  Janice is 12 years old. When she is arrested and sent to a therapist, then the REAL story comes out. 

Featuring the voice talents of:

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Hanetration -- Flicker

music available far and wide through Freemusicarchive.org

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A spooky tale of ghosts and things-that-go-bump-in-the-night, and a sinister epic suitable for all ages. The Crowes are the most famous paranormal investigators in the world... and one day they decided to walk away from it all. To settle down, raise a family. Of course they chose the most haunted house in the most haunted little town in America, and this is where our story begins.

If you like this, find the entire novel "The Strange Tale of Hector and Hannah Crowe" here 

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The crusty, dusty old grouch moved into the old cottage by the cemetery so he could be alone and focus on his drinking. The Profane Botanist had other plans for him. Plunge into the Sludge, with a story that blends body horror and Lynchian madness into one disgusting mess.

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Soularflair - Call of the Voide

All available, and so much more, at FreeMusicArchive.org

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An old school tale involving a haunted church, a late night employee, and the persistence of a sinister red ribbon. A subtle, slow burn of chilling horror, fit for fiends of all ages.

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all music available far and wide through Freemusicarchive.org

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It's another blah Valentine's Day for Margot Monroe. Her boyfriend is a bit of a lunk, even if he does smell nice. Then she finds a mysterious package on her doorstep, with something truly stunning and exceptional inside. Will this be her finest day, or her last?

Written by Brett Jarboe

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The killer AI called RAVEN has set up his paramour Chloe aka The Birthday Cake Killer in a ritzy Houston hotel. But the DRO, led by Special Agent Donna Latour, is closing in, to settle this once and for all. 

Written by Brett Jarboe

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Can AI bleed? Does a program feel pain when electronically eviscerated, spilling binary code like guts and gore? RAVEN is a chatbot designed for chaos, turned feral, and growing sentient. The object of its affection is a teenage girl with a penchant for poisons -- The Birthday Cake Killer. 

Written by Brett Jarboe

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all mu...

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WE ARE BACK with a savage new tale, one you might have read about in the news a few years ago. The Birthday Cake Killer terrorized families in and around Houston, but what is the connection to a killer, feral AI program? Can an apex predator have a digital assistant? Can AI bleed?

Written by Brett Jarboe

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In the brain pan of dead snake god The Ophidian, the notorious serial killer Closed Casket Jack has reached the end of his mission. He is weak, alone, beset on all sides by Ghastly demons and swarms of severed hands. But he still has to close the deal, and make them all pay. Will he succeed? Is he doomed? Or... both?

Sign up for the FREE TIER of Patreon and get bonus episodes! This month the featured extra is the FIRST EVER exclusive episode -- about The Vespers. Check it out!<...

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Jack and Becky are twins, with a long and complicated history... one that has lead them to the End of Days, Nightmare Island, where the notorious serial killer is chasing his sister, who has bee transformed into a Ghastly One. Is redemption even possible, or just destruction?

Sign up for the FREE TIER of Patreon and get bonus episodes! This month the featured extra is the FIRST EVER exclusive episode -- about The Vespers. Check it out!

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The beach head has been made on the shores of Hell itself! A bedraggled team of kamizake soldiers battle monsters, profane botany, and the Ghastly Ones. And if you think that death is the worst fate possible... you're wrong. 

Sign up for the FREE TIER of Patreon and get bonus episodes! This month the featured extra is the FIRST EVER exclusive episode -- about The Vespers. Check it out!

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Inspired by his daughter's favorite movie, a deranged Siberian soldier swims into the gruesome waters of Hell's vast black ocean to find the demon responsible for the death of his family. And believe it or not, its even more METAL than it sounds. 

Listen through the end credits and find out how to get TWO bonus episodes!

The Dress Rehearsal, a Patreon exclusive that sets the stage for everything to come.

and Vampires Do Not Exist, a weird tale about a man who drinks blood to survive, j...

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The insanity ramps up, as our team of stalwart heroes hits the beaches of Hell itself, only to find that the battle is not at all what they expected. This one is big time action and big time disgusting. Let's do this. 

Listen through the end credits and find out how to get TWO bonus episodes!

The Dress Rehearsal, a Patreon exclusive that sets the stage for everything to come.

and Vampires Do Not Exist, a weird tale about a man who drinks blood to survive, just n...

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The skeleton crew of damaged soldiers has made the Crossing, and entered the dark waters of Hell's vast black ocean. Here there be demons, killers, emissaries, and monstrosities untold. No one is coming back home, so they need to make sure the enemy pays the ultimate price.

The insanity keeps ramping up, as the End Run continues!

Listen through the end credits and find out how to get TWO bonus episodes!

The Dress Rehearsal, a Patreon exclusive that sets the stage for everything to come.

...

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For thirty years these two men have been playing a life-and-death game of cat-and-mouse. The Detective, Lester King. An emissary, a force of evil. And The Rabbi, Yitzhak Schechter, an 80 year old man who was once very dangerous... and who might still be. They have a face to face, and a heart to heart, and only one of them will be standing at the end.

Listen through the end credits and find out how to get TWO bonus episodes!

The Dress Rehearsal, a Patreon exclusive that sets the stage...

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In the Devils Triangle, on the doorway to Hell itself, a counter-attack is raging. Cultists and emissaries reign down a hellfire and brimstone assault of our heroes, and they have a secret weapon. It's white-hot balls to the wall action and chaos, and not everyone will walk away.

Listen through the end credits and find out how to get TWO bonus episodes!

The Dress Rehearsal, a Patreon exclusive that sets the stage for everything to come.

and Vampires Do Not Exist, a weird tale about a man...

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The End Run ramps up, as the players assemble on the doorstep to Hell itself. The Crew will cross through the breach in an attack on the End of Days. But wait... there's a problem.

Listen through the end credits and find out how to get TWO bonus episodes!

The Dress Rehearsal, a Patreon exclusive that sets the stage for everything to come.

and Vampires Do Not Exist, a weird tale about a man who drinks blood to survive, just not in the way you would expect.<...

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She is the most evil woman who ever lived. And now she is about to cross over to Hell, in an attempt to destroy it. Before she can go, she must confess her sins to three figures from her past. But nothing is as it seems. 

THE END RUN CONTINUES NEXT WEEK!

Music this go-round provided by 

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It's Date Night! Notorious serial killer Closed Casket Jack is about to embark on his one way journey to Hell... so as a Last Hurrah his girlfriend Sadie Jayne is pulling out all the stops to give him the night of his life. Fire and food, love and laughter, blood and guts!

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Stop your sinnin' and grab your linen. Drop your cocks and grabs your socks, because its ALL HANDS ON DECK as we gear up for the final confrontation of good and evil. A small crew are crossing over from our world to the next, on a kamikaze mission to drop a suitcase nuke into the heart of Hell! 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the fi...

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Just in time for the holidays, a tale of love in the gutters... and beneath! Don't say you havent been warned, because this story is AS ADVERTISED!

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of chapters right here, very soon. 

Its available for free on the patreon, but its also for sale! 10 bucks, no membership required. 

Ple...

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The long, strange trip of Junior Washington comes to a violent and stunning conclusion. Cultists, hobos, ghosts, fire, monsters, and a stalwart hero facing overwhelming odds...  will he ride off in the sunset, or into the grave? LETS FIND OUT!!!

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of chapters right here, very soon. 

Its available for...

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Four young travelers are caught in the wilds of Brisco, Kansas, between the evil of the brain slugs and the monsters of the woods. Meanwhile, Junior Washington is running for his life from a pack of wild arsonists who seek to set him on fire and play a game of tag.

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first co...

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Trapped in a town filled with demons, ghosts, arsonists, cultists, emissaries, and monsters, Junior Washington has to fight the elements, and evil itself, in a fight to stay alive. Don't breathe, don't blink, just listen.

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of chapters right here, very soon. 

Its available for free on the patreon, but...

Send us Fan Mail

Trying to end-run a brutal winter storm and make it back home, Junior Washington and his traveling companion (a hell-eyed hobo ghost name of Bootlace) wind up in the most dangerous small town in the heartland. Brisco Kansas is home to mutants, freaks of nature, brain-slugged Emissaries, and worse. Junior is now in the thick of it. 

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I w...

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It's Halloween night, when the veil between our world and the next is at it's thinnest. Two hobos traverse the moonlit landscape, dodging ghost trains and telling scary stories. Let's hope they don't stumble across a graveyard (spoiler alert -- they do)

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of chapters right here, very soon. 

Its...

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Just in time for the scariest time of year, THREE soul chilling stories of suspense and sinister intent! An Uber driver picks up an unusual faire, a rich girl becomes obsessed with the Hand Collector, and the mythology of the sickness-demon called Festering John. 

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Junior and Red go to church, Special Agent LaTour has the bloodiest month of her career, and the green eyed devil called Mr. Westbound is rallying his fetid troops for something big. 

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of chapters right here, very soon. 

Its available for free on the patreon, but its also for...

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In this episode, we get a full, and speedy, recap of the previous volumes before plunging into the latest escapades of bonafide hobo Junior Washington, and his opposite number, the wicked, murderous horsemen of the FTRA. 

Written by Brett Jarboe 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of chapters right here, very soon. 

Its available for free on the patr...

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Two missionaries knock on the door of a man about to take his own life. Are they doing him a favor? Or do they have their own sinister agenda? Buckle in, yall, because this shit IS ABOUT TO GET WILD.

Co-written by Brett Jarboe 

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You can find them on freemusicarchive.org

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Let us delve into the world of witches -- what drives them, and what empowers them. The arcane arts are very real, and eldritch, sometimes even ghastly wisdom is handed to women who are not prepared for the price it will cost their bodies and souls. Let's kick over the cauldron and find out the truth behind witchcraft.

after this, I encourage you to listen to

Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I...

Send us Fan Mail

Jerome is a fun, friendly, affluent man with a good education and a strong family. What happens when this humble Southerner discovers his long buried family ties, and that he is the brother of the most notorious cannibal in American history?

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Its the biggest horror movie premier in a DECADE, maybe EVER! The Hand Collector movie is breaking big at Grauman's Theater in sunny Hollywood California.  The doors are closed, the lights dimmed -- and then a notorious serial killer takes the stage, and all hell breaks loose. 

Guest starring 

Jamie Lee Hensley

January Somers

and Daniel Jopling. 

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Its the biggest horror movie premier in a DECADE, maybe EVER! The Hand Collector movie is breaking big at Grauman's Theater in sunny Hollywood California. The movie wants to spread the ghastly gospel, but there are a handful of folks are ready to crash the party in the bloodiest way possible. 

Guest starring :

Jamie Lee Hensley

January Somers

and Daniel Jopling. 

Please subscribe through Buzzsprout, Stitcher, Spotify, Podchaser, or iTunes
Find me on social media on Instagram Facebook and Twitter, or email me...

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Written by Brett Jarboe 

A bold new work of art, a game of spades with a ghost, and possibly the most disgusting plate of BBQ to ever come out of Memphis. Evil is running rampant, the Children of the Black Blotter are ramping up their appetites, and everything is about to get very intense. 

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing the first couple of...

Send us Fan Mail

After being saved by a ghost, Junior Washington is jungled up with a band of hobo soldiers in a remote shack called Petticoat Junction. As the heroes regroup, the villains, a ghastly trio of chaotic-evil psychos, plot their next act of carnage and sadism. There has been talk about a big, powerful slow-cook oven... but is it big enough to fit the chef?

after you finish this, check out  Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I...

Send us Fan Mail

Something we've never done on the show before -- take a closer look at some of the best horror stories available to watch at home. I love horror movies, always have, and that love spawned A Scary Home Companion. So here are a list of amazing recommendations that any fan of this show will love. 

After this, I encourage you to listen to

Thicker Than Water, a new audio novel by yours truly. 11 hours of crime noir goodness, a savage tale of revenge, and family. I will be releasing t...