Proxy with Yowei Shaw

Ben's neighbors are right there. So... why is it so hard to actually know them?

We're tackling that question live—by finding him a proxy who's figured out how to turn a block of strangers into something more... neighbors.

Come watch us try something a little experimental. 

Tuesday, March 31st at 1pm EST (on Zoom)

Patreon members will get the link that morning. If you're not one yet, you can join us here. 

The new season of Proxy returns in mid-April. In the meantime, we're sharing something we loved. On this episode of Depresh Mode, comedian John Moe and the journalist P.E. Moskowitz dig into the question: when your mind feels broken, is it you — or the world?

Find Depresh Mode with John Moe wherever you get your podcasts.

Read P.E. Moskowitz' book Breaking Awake and their newsletter Mental Hellth. 

New episodes of Proxy return in April. In the meantime, we're sharing something we love — an episode from The Longest Shortest Time that digs into a conundrum so many of us deal with: guys being creeps. After a troubling incident involving her daughter, Hillary Frank sets out to understand how her daughter's middle school is teaching consent... and what she discovers throws her for a loop.

Find The Longest Shortest wherever you get your podcasts.

Hillary put together this list of organizations and individuals doing innovative work on sex ed:

This week, while Proxy is busy investigating new cases, we're sharing something we loved. One of our favorite episodes from The Dream, a show about the "American Dream" and all the systems (and assholes) that make it harder to achieve. In this episode, a once popular teen anti-abortion activist finds herself switching sides in this national debate.

From the episode: 

Proxy will be back soon with new cases. In the meantime, we're sharing an investigation into arguably the most consequential social force shaping life on this planet: capitalism. 

Scene On Radio isn't afraid to tackle the big questions about who we are and how we got that way. In this series on capitalism, they try to understand how capitalism became our dominant economic system, what is it really, and how to make our economy work for people and living beings, not the other way around. 

Some resources for fighting fa...

This week we’re sharing something we loved and found useful, just in time for the new year. A rigorous look by the show Science Vs into whether there’s any science behind manifestations. 

Nicole is an organizer who's good at channeling her anger. The problem is she can't always downshift. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life or Yaroslava Can't Go Home.

From the episode: 

This week, we're presenting an episode of one of our favorite podcasts. 

Heavyweight, hosted by Jonathan Goldstein, creates space for difficult conversations and resolving long-standing regrets and unanswered questions. Balancing humor and empathy, host Jonathan Goldstein helps his subjects pinpoint the moment things went wrong and joins them on a quest to make them right.

This episode is about Anita, who, on her flight, to emigrate from Italy in 1959, was tasked with babysitting a two-year-old boy being brought to the US for adoption. During the flight, Anita fell in love with the child, and for t...

Erin wants to forgive the person she's holding a grudge against, but doesn't know how. Is it possible to just disappear resentment?

If this episode resonates, you might also try Brian Can't Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law or JC's Kids Won't Talk To Her.

From the episode: 

Yowei and bedraggled podcast spouse Kyle broadcast (sorta) live from their car about where the campaign is at. 

Today Oct. 31st is the last day of our drive to reach 1000 paying Patreon members, so we can get an additional $25k from a generous listener and cover the costs of making a year two.

We're so close! Latest count: 946!

https://www.patreon.com/cw/ProxyPodcast

Yaroslava’s town in Ukraine was taken by Russians. She's now safe in the US. But how do you make a new life when you feel guilty about not being home?

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life or JC's Kids Won't Talk To Her.

From the episode: 

How close are we to getting to 1000 paying Patreon members so we can cover the costs of making a year two?!

Plus, a conversation with introvert ally (and extrovert) Jennifer Kahnweiler on the changes she's made to get along better with the introverts in her life. 

To listen to the full exclusive premium episode, consider joining our Patreon starting at $5 a month. You’ll get ad-free episodes, exclusive premium episodes, access to the chat, and other goodies. To just get our newsletter, join our Patreon for free 🍏

A historic step in extrovert-introvert relations i.e. a proxy bloodbath roundtable with 2 extroverts and 2 introverts airing our grievances about each other. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try Aparna and the Self-Loathing Introvert or Zakiya Used to Be So Fun.

From the episode: 

At the heart of many family estrangements lies a mystery. Adult kids insist they’ve told their parents why they’re walking away, while parents say they don’t understand. Why is it sometimes so hard for parents to hear their kids? And how to get through?

If this episode resonates, you might also try Bob and the Forgiveness Spellor Brian Can't Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law.

From the episode: 

The case of the mom who doesn’t understand, and the daughter who’s done explaining.

If this episode resonates, you might also try Bob and the Forgiveness Spellor Brian Can't Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law.

From the episode: 

Proxy is an in...

Alex used to host a huge podcast (Reply All). He now makes a new independent show and loves doing it. Only problem is, Alex now has to ask for money all the time to survive, which he hates.

If this episode resonates, you might also like Brian Can’t Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law or Mic Chooses the Wrong Life.

From the episode: 

Ever since the election, Sandy Ernest Allen has been clocking a strange silence from cis people about trans rights. So Sandy reached into the void to hear what the silence had to say.

If this episode resonates, you might also try Nicole Can't Stop Being Aggro. 

From the episode: 

Anya Kamenetz was having trouble coping with the state of the world. So she decided to report on those feelings. In this conversation, Anya shares what she learned from talking to scientists, activists, and thinkers about our collective emotions - why we feel the things we do, the limits of those feelings, and how to move through them to take action. 

From the episode: 

Is it just us, or does American culture have narcissism fever? Are we becoming more narcissistic? Or are we now over-using and misusing this term to the point of meaninglessness? Wait, is obsessing about other people's narcissism its own kind of narcissism? 

In this Magical Overthinkers episode, host Amanda Montell settles in for an illuminating chat with psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula, author of the New York Times bestseller "It's Not You." 

From the episode: 

A conversation with Dr. Alissa Ackerman about her restorative justice work on the frontlines of Me Too, using proxy-like conversations. 

This is a Patreon exclusive premium episode we're releasing on the main feed. If you want to hear more conversations like this, consider joining our Patreon, starting at $5 a month.

Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely mostly on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon starting at $5 a month. You’ll get exclusive premium episodes, ad-free episodes, and access...

We'll be back with a new episode in two weeks. In the meantime, enjoy this episode from our friends at Science of Happiness. 

When we’re deep in burnout, even the simplest decisions can feel overwhelming.  A conversation about slowing down, listening inward, and what it takes to rebuild trust in your inner knowing on the other side of exhaustion. 

From the episode:

The case of the people person who fell out of love with people. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life or Bisexual Wife Guy.

From the episode: 

Proxy is an independent podcast, supported mostly by listeners. If you want to help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. Membership st...

Yowei doesn't have an internal narrator telling stories about her life - at least a voice she can hear in her head. She talks to psychology professor Jonathan Adler about what this means and what anyone can do to strengthen their self-narrator, if they wanted to. 

To listen to the full exclusive premium episode, consider joining our Patreon starting at $5 a month. You’ll get ad-free episodes, exclusive premium episodes, access to the chat, and other goodies. To just get our newsletter, join our Patreon for free 🍏

From the episod...

The case of Amanda, a writer whose internal monologue won't stop narrating her life, instead of just letting her live it.

If this episode resonates, you might also try Aparna and the Self-Loathing Introvert or Mic Chooses the Wrong Life.

From the episode: 

When someone with Alzheimer's gets upset about something that isn't actually happening, it can be easy to dismiss their feelings. But what if we approached those feelings not as problems to get rid of, but mysteries to solve? Psychologist Claudia Drossel unpacks the feelings of people with Alzheimer's and how to decode them to use as a guide to give better care.

To listen to the full exclusive premium episode, consider joining our Patreon starting at $5 a month. You’ll get ad-free episodes, exclusive premium episodes, access to the chat, and other goodies. To ju...

The case of Brian, a journalist whose mother-in-law has Alzheimer's. Even though Brian knows she can’t help misremembering things, he can’t stop losing his patience with her, and with himself. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life or Bisexual Wife Guy.

From the episode: 

Proxy is an independent podcast, supported mostly by listeners. If you want to hel...

The case of Evan and Chris, best friends who love playing music together. But after the band suffers a terrible tragedy, they find themselves unable to regain their momentum. We pair them up with another musician who’s all too familiar with the neverending drama that comes with being in a band with friends. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life or Brian Can't Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law.

From the episode: 

For a long time, Yowei saw her introversion as a character flaw to fix. She gets advice from comedian (and fellow introvert) Aparna Nancherla about how to stop wishing for personality puberty to hit.

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life or Bisexual Wife Guy.

From the episode: 

The case of Mic, who feels like he defied his fate and now has no purpose in life. We find someone uniquely able to help him break out of his regret loop. 

This episode is often a first listen for new Proxy listeners. If it resonates, you might also try Bisexual Wife Guy or Brian Can’t Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law.

From the episode: 

If you're new to Proxy, welcome. This episode is a great place to begin. 

The case of George, the bisexual wife guy who got dumped. In this episode, we find a proxy to stand in for a listener's ex - another queer woman who left her straight relationship.

If this episode resonates, you might also try Mic Chooses the Wrong Life, Amanda and the Nonstop Narrator or Brian Can't Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law.

From the episode: 

Yowei shares exciting show news and goes on a self-delusion bender with the team at Proxy HQ. Is she being delusional? Or is delusion just necessary for starting any new project?

From the episode: 

Proxy is an independent podcast, supported mostly by listeners. If you want to help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. Membership starts at $5 a month and includes bonus episodes, ad-free-listening, and access to our group Zoom hangs. You c...

Conspiracy theories have been gaining traction all the way to the highest seats of power. So, are there emotional dynamics at play that we could understand to be able to do something about it? 

Last year, Zach Mack’s dad sent him a strange email, asking to bet $10,000 to settle once and for all who was correct and who was the brainwashed one.  

From NPR’s Embedded podcast, this is episode 2 of the Alternate Realities series: Down the Rabbit Hole. 

From the episode: 

For as long as she can remember, Nichole Hill has had a complicated relationship with Black history. Then in 2020, she stumbled on a digital archive of pre Civil Rights era Black newspapers and got obsessed with the scandalous stories she found. Our Ancestors Were Messy is her new podcast that explores Black history through the lens of gossip and drama. In this episode, Nichole tells the story of a Victorian era love triangle that rocked the elites of DC. 

From the episode: 

Basket Case is a new show about mental health. In this episode, host Nicole Kelly (NK) takes on perfectionism, an issue that Yowei has personally struggled with. Plus, some breaking news about Proxy.

From the episode: 

Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going...

When Yowei heard about the new podcast Little Devils, she was like: finally, someone being honest about a thing we all do. On Little Devils, Jasmin Bauomy interrogates the snap judgments she makes of other people, to find the story behind that annoying thing they do. In this episode, we share a story from Little Devils and we toast 2024 with a year-end recap. 

From the episode: 

Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on lis...

The story of someone who suffered alone in secret for 8 years with a problem he was too afraid to Google -  and then he stumbled into a support group. In this episode, we dive into the emotional dynamics of support groups with Jason Yu. Why did support groups help him, when nothing else did?

If this episode resonates, you might also try Aparna and the Self-Loathing Introvert or Yaroslava Can't Go Home.

From the episode: 

Whoever wins the election, Americans will still want to rip each other's heads off. Social psychologist Jay Van Bavel helps us understand why we should care about polarization, how we got here, and what, if anything, we can do about it. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try How to Cope with Now or Nicole Can't Stop Being Aggro.

From the episode: 

We all know that moment - when you feel like you need to cry in front of other people, but don't want to cry. In this episode, Yowei talks to Heather Christle, the author of The Crying Book, to parse what’s happening in that moment, what tears are saying and how we should respond to them. 

If this episode resonates, you might also try Aparna and the Self-Loathing Introvert or Amanda and the Nonstop Narrator.

From the episode:

Recently, Yowei noticed a pattern among new friends she's making. These friends all make her feel lighter, more playful, and listened to... and they all have a background in improv comedy. Today, we're sharing an interview that gets inside the head of an improv comedian to see how they connect with other people. 

This episode comes from ReThinking, a podcast where organizational psychologist Adam Grant has lively discussions and debates with people about new thoughts and new ways of thinking. In the interview, Adam talks to comedian Mae Martin about the value of vulnerability in co...

Finally, a campaign reveal. Did we get additional funding to hire Kim for more hours? Plus, some updates for what’s in store for Proxy. 

Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely mostly on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon starting at $5 a month. You’ll get exclusive premium episodes, ad-free episodes, and access to the chat. To just get our newsletter, join our Patreon for free 🍏

Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw

Get in touch...