20 THINGS ADOPTION PODCAST with Sherrie Eldridge
Many adoptive, foster, stepmoms, and grandmothers are suffering in silence. No one in the world of adoption is giving them the tools for recovery. No one is teaching them how to handle adoptee pushback and rejection. No one is wrapping arms around them and praying when all they can do is cry.When moms realize the unknown depth of their child’s trauma, a common reaction is self-doubt. If she doesn’t know what happened, how can she find words to help her child process it? It’s terrifying, like climbing Everest without ropes.She's so self-doubting that she almost always...
The Strength of Fellow-Adoptee Friendship, with Pam Kroskie
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Praying for the Wounded Child: A Conversation with Virginia Wells
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In this episode, we sit down with Virginia Wells—author, licensed social worker, and adoptive mom—to explore the intersection of faith, adoption, and healing. Virginia shares wisdom from her powerful book Praying for a Wounded Child, offering real-life encouragement and deeply spiritual insights for parents navigating trauma, loss, and complex family journeys. Through personal stories, scriptural guidance, and practical tools like journaling and prayer, Virginia invites us to embrace God's presence in our brokenness and to discover healing for both ourselves and the children we love. Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or simply some...
Speaking the Heart Language of Adopted and Foster Children
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In this heartfelt episode, adoption author Sherrie Eldridge shares deeply personal insights and practical advice for adoptive and foster parents seeking to connect with their children truly. Drawing from her book 20 Things Adoptive Parents Need to Succeed, Sherrie explores how well-intentioned words can be misinterpreted by adopted children—and offers better ways to communicate that honor both the child and their birth family. From reframing statements like “You were chosen” to understanding the primal wound of adoption, this episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to build stronger, more empathetic relationships within adoptive families.
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Becoming Yourself in the Middle of Motherhood with Emma Fulenwider
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On this episode, we sit down with Emma Fulenwider—author, literary agent, TEDx speaker, and mother navigating the complexities of modern parenting—to explore what it truly means to belong in a world full of pressure, perfectionism, and plastic toys. Emma shares her personal journey from being an "odd kid" who learned to mimic others to fit in, to rediscovering herself in her thirties by embracing authenticity. She opens up about the quiet crisis many moms face today: the loss of mentorship, the overwhelming culture of parenting schools of thought, and the isolating experience of r...
When Love Isn’t Enough: Amy VanTine on Parenting Through RAD
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In this deeply moving episode, Sherrie Eldridge welcomes Amy Vantine, a mother, educator, and co-founder of RAD Advocates, to share her harrowing and inspiring journey of parenting a child with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). From her early dreams of motherhood to the trauma, confusion, and eventual heartbreak of dissolving an adoption, Amy opens up about the realities few talk about—and the healing mission she’s now embraced to support other families walking a similar path.
Key Takeaways:
Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) Is Often Misunderstood: Children with RAD...Breaking the Cycle: Tova J. Kreps on Trauma, Adoption, and Building Resilient Families
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In this episode, Sherrie invites Tova J. Kreps, licensed social worker and co-founder of Wellspring Counseling, to discuss the complexities of adoption, trauma recovery, and the power of faith in navigating these challenges. Tova shares her inspiring journey, shaped by her upbringing in a missionary family, her personal experience with adoption, and her decades of professional work helping families navigate the complexities of trauma and mental health. Together, they explore the unique challenges adoptive parents face, the importance of setting healthy boundaries, and the profound need for self-care and support in times of crisis.<...
From Fear to Love: Healing and Hope in Adoption with Brian Post
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In this heartfelt and transformative episode, Sherrie Eldridge sits down with esteemed guest Brian Post, a renowned adoption and child behavior expert. Brian, an adoptee and former foster child, shares his compelling life story—from his early experiences in foster care to reuniting with his birth mother decades later. His journey underscores the resilience, trauma, and profound emotional growth that many adoptees experience.
Brian discusses the power of love as a healing force, the critical importance of self-awareness, and the hard truths about the foster and adoption systems. He reveals how stress in...
Virginia Wells: Addressing Grief and Loss in Adoption
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In this conversation, Sherrie Eldridge interviews Virginia Wells, an adoptive mom and author, about her experiences and insights. They discuss the challenges of adoptive parenting, the importance of preparation and realistic expectations, and the power of prayer. Virginia shares her own journey as an adoptive mom and offers advice for prospective adoptive parents. She also talks about her upcoming book, which covers topics such as grief, identity, and self-care in the context of adoption. Overall, the conversation highlights the need for support, understanding, and a compassionate approach to adoption.
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Virginia Wells Speaks Hope to Discouraged Adoptive Moms
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n this conversation, Sherrie Eldridge interviews Virginia Wells, an adoptive mom and author, about her experiences and insights. They discuss the challenges of adoptive parenting, the importance of preparation and realistic expectations, and the power of prayer. Virginia shares her own journey as an adoptive mom and offers advice for prospective adoptive parents. She also talks about her upcoming book, which covers topics such as grief, identity, and self-care in the context of adoption. Overall, the conversation highlights the need for support, understanding, and a compassionate approach to adoption.
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Jocelyn Williams' Adoption Journey and Attachment Theory
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Jocelyn Williams, a developmental movement consultant, discusses the importance of movement-based solutions for infant and child development. She emphasizes the significance of the first year of life in building the foundation of neurology and explains how movement patterns and sensory experiences contribute to brain development. Williams shares her personal experience of adopting children and the challenges they faced, including attachment issues and learning difficulties. She highlights the role of neurodevelopmental movement in addressing these challenges and promoting healing. Williams also encourages parents to prioritize self-care and forgiveness as they navigate the journey of parenting...
Dafna Lender, LCSW, Explains Why RAD Diagnosis Is Outdated
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Dafna Lender, LCSW, is a Licensed Social Worker and Certified Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapist. Experts such as Besssel van der Koklk applaud her work.
When Sherrie Eldridge asks her about the term "Reactive Attachment Disorder," quite the conversation occurred.
Sherrie shared her story of how she has recovered from this, and Dafna taught in depth how and why the term is outdated and what adoptive moms need to understand about parenting a child that has come from severe trauma.
Key points from the podcast:
1. Correct and current diagnostic term f...
Author Keri Williams Addresses Reactive Attachment Disorder
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In this episode, I talk with award-winning author and advocate, Keri Williams, about her two-decade journey as a foster and adoptive parent, highlighting the challenges of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). Keri shares her personal adoption experiences and the behavioral challenges she faced. She discusses navigating mental health systems, societal misconceptions, and the need for more support and resources for RAD caregivers. Join me for this enlightening conversation on parenting children with RAD and the importance of self-care and advocacy in the adoption community.
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Author Karen Springs Encourages Parents Who Adopted Children Internationally
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Karen Springs provides cutting-edge research about how adoptive families wit kids adopted from overseas have progressed. In her new book—THE BACKSEAT OF ADOPTION, she shares How the families she worked with in Europe are currently progressing.
Are the children thriving? Are the parents thriving?What are the joys of parenting?What are common obstacles?How many children are searching for their roots?Are the parents involved in their adult children’s lives?All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge
Adoptee Julie Ryan McGue's Search for Origins
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What could be more exciting than to be an adopted person and find the family that you never knew existed?
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Navigating Adoptee Birthdays
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Hi, my friends. Well, we're going to visit the subject of adoptee birthdays again today. I just recently had one. I'm well into my seventh decade of life, and I look back and I realize that there are so many things that I couldn't say or explain. About adoptee birthdays in my younger years, but I'd just kinda like to share with you the new thoughts that I have about birthdays so that maybe the whole triad adoptees, my fellow adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, foster parents, can glean some insights so that adoptees...
Sherrie Encourages Younger Fellow-Adopted Children
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Sometimes, adopted children get discouraged about numerous meltdowns and need encouragement from someone who's been there--author Sherrie Eldridge. Eldridge crafted this short message just for the children by sharing the reason for meltdowns, which is trauma. Children are taught that because of the repercussions of trauma, oftentimes love from others and from God doesn’t translate as love. Eldridge shares several personal examples and encourages children to:
1. Remember that God has a wonderful purpose for their lives.
2. Be hopeful that meltdowns can diminish and healing from trauma can occur.
3. Trust that they'r...
Susan Tebos Shares Book for Adopted Teens
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And I'm very excited about this guest that's going to be talking with me during the next segment. It is Susan Tebows, who is the author of, we've Been There, true Stories, surprising Insights, and Aha Moments for Adopted Teens. Susan is a writer, speaker, bible study leader and adoptive mom. And she's got such a heart for adoptees.
I was so taken by that. So fellow adoptees, I know you're gonna really like her insights in this book and in this podcast, she and her husband Mike have three a...
Dafna Lender LCSW, Describes Adoptee Loss
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Teen and adult adoptees will be encouraged by such a gifted therapist as Dafna Lender LCSW. Dafna shares initially how her upbringing challenged her to be a voice for those that have no voice. Hearing her validation of the adoptee loss is moving and will bless the heart of every adoptee that listens.
Additionally, Lender addresses the need of adoptive and foster parents to know what will help them address control issues, such as procrastination for going to school.
Lastly, Sherrie Eldridge asks Lender if she thinks a recovery-type program shou...
Ron Nydam Ph.D. Revisits Adoption and Relinquishment
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Ron Nydam, Ph.D., is a highly respected and beloved pastor, speaker, author, counselor, and teacher in the field of adoption. For the last two decades, he educated international audiences about relinquishment and adoption. These two topics are his specialty and he addresses them with the finesse of a skilled surgeon. His main audiences are:
Adoptees struggling with the repercussions of relinquishment.First (Birth) parents, continuing to mourn their losses.Adoptive parents who can't understand the behavior of their teen and adult children.Ron has authored of two books:
ADOPTEES CO...
Dr. Ronald Nydam Explains Why Adoptees Can't Attach Fully
Dr. Ronald Nydam is a specialist in the field of adoption as a pastor, author, speaker, counselor, and teacher. His area of expertise is explaining the differences between adoption and relinquishment, while emphasizing that most people don't understand the depth of the power of relinquishment for the entire adoption triad. Dr. Nydam helps listeners understand that relinquishment sets in place the adoptee's distorted perceptions of both first and adoptive moms. Is there hope for recovery amidst these relationships? You bet!
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Derek Clark Urges Fostered Teens to Never Give Up
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Derek Clark’s life is one of resilience and redemption. As a
child he suffered unthinkable child abuse, abandonment and
emotional distress before being turned over to the psychiatric
hospital at age five. His 13 years in the San Francisco bay area
foster care system reflected an early life of humiliation,
aggression, emotional distress, overwhelming anxiety and
being wrongfully labeled.
Eventually, with the help of loving foster parents and a
fantastic social worker, he defied the artificial limitations
imposed upon him. Derek knows first-hand how to...
The Hot Potato of Adoptee Anger
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Bronwen interviews Sherrie on a rare topic--adoptee anger. They discuss the two kinds of anger and emphasize the fact that anger itself is good--its a God-given emotion that warns us if something is wrong, like the red light on a dashboard.
Anger can become toxic when anger is stuffed and turns into bitterness and hate.
The unintentional adversarial relationship that often occurs between adoptive moms and their children is common, but its a topic that hasn't be addressed by adoption professionals, speakers, and therapists.
Adoptees secretly attribute their lion-like anger to a...
One Mom's Story about Adopting Internationally
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Bronwen Smith, a mom who adopted from Korea, shares the real-life struggles and joys of adopting internationally. Learn how she and her husband decided to adopt, how they chose the country to adopt from, what it was like to take off in the plane with the knowledge that their son was leaving his entire home behind, and how they juggle joy and peace on a daily basis.
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The Trauma Wound of Adoptive and Foster Moms
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Not only must adoptive and foster moms understand the depth of their child’s pre-adoption pain, but also their own trauma wound. “What wound?” they may say. “My child is the one with the deep wound, not me. Don’t be ridiculous.”
Adoptive moms may be offended or defensive when told they have a trauma wound. Adoptive mom says—I think many people can experience defensiveness or protectiveness about our woundedness. To be comfortable disclosing ourselves authentically requires safety. Safe people are hard to find. Additionally, we may be conscious of the adoption “label...
Adopted Kids May See Adoptive Mom As An Enemy
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Sometimes, adopted kids see their adoptive moms as an enemy. Does that mean there's something wrong with them? Bad genes? Bad character? A million times, no! Adoptees have been deeply wounded, first through the loss of their first mothers, and second, by being placed into the arms of strangers. Learn four reasons adoptees see their moms like this and what moms can do to gain hope and endurance.
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What Kind of Love Adoptees Really Need
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This podcast reveals how adoption's parent/child relationships oftentimes become strained and explains that the strain is not the fault of parent nor child. Five adoptive moms give real-life examples of strain. Sherrie Eldridge reveals the greatest gift parents can give their kids in every situation--the gift of a non-abandoning heart. The pre-requisite to a non-abandoning heart is "risky love"--choosing to remain in the meltdown with the child, trace current-day strain to perceived abandonment, and speak to the past as well as the present. With her seasoned adoptee voice, Sherrie urges fellow adoptees to...
Preparing for Adoptee Push Back
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Relationships between adoptive moms and their kids will involve more stress than bio kids and parents. If an adoptive mother isn't educated about this reality, she may conclude that her parenting is inferior--"I thought it was me and my inability to nurture and support them properly." Sherrie Eldridge proposes a bootcamp within her new book that would prepare parents well. As a result, they won't enter the battlefields without being seasoned warriors. The first step is to learn what a "non-intentional" relationship is and how the four aspects of it affect both...
The Dance of Adoption
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There are many adoptive parents whose adopted children can't receive their love. If we liken it to a dance, the adopted child may delight in stepping on the parent's toes. Sherrie Eldridge explains why this happens from an adoptee perspective, as well as sharing adoptive parent thoughts about the rejection they experience. Hopefully, parents will come away with new ideas about how to dance effectively with their adopted children.
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Dafna Lender, LCSW., Shares What Kind of Therapy Many Adopted Kids Really Need
Dafna is a child and family therapist with over 20 years of experience. She is a certified trainer, supervisor, and consultant in Theraplay® and Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy, and coauthor of Theraplay: The Practitioner’s Guide. Dafna has successfully treated children and their parents with a variety of backgrounds, including children raised in orphanages, with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, exposed to domestic violence and community violence and children of parents with chronic mental illness and attachment wounds. Dafna provides trainings and consultations for psychologists and psychotherapists around the world.
Junk Transforms to Treasure
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Podcast #2
Many adoptees and foster children haven't been told that it's possible to find freedom from their painful past. Sherrie reviews the literature that's been available, especially that of Nancy Verrier's THE PRIMAL WOUND. The case is made that in physical healing, validation of the wound is just the beginning. Most adoptees want more--more growth, more steps to take toward freedom, and more self-worth. Sherrie shares her story of how this reality transpired in her life.
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Good News for the World of Adoption!
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Sherrie Eldridge introduces herself as a veteran adoptee and adoption author, but enthusiastically invites adoptive, birth, foster, step parents and her fellow adoptees to join her in discovering wonderful new research and experience in the world of adoption:
1. The child's brain records parental acts of love even though child's level of receptivity is low.
2. Parents can be assured through brain research that their acts of love won't be forgotten.
3. Adoptees can be free from their painful past and parents can be free from their painful self (I will never be...
