Beyond The Cabin In The Woods

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Weapons

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Zach Cregger

Written by: Zach Cregger

Released: 2025

Quote: “It might be just what I need.”

Poll: Why doesn’t Gladys try to control Alex?

Rule: There are plenty of solid hospice and nursing home options.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Some part...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Aliens

HORROR-ADJACENT SUITE

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: James Cameron

Written by: James Cameron

Released: 1986

Quote: “I say we grease this rat-fuck son-of-a-bitch right now.”; “I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.”; “Maybe you haven't been keeping up on current events, but we just got our asses kicked, pal!”

Poll: What do you think Alien 3 would be like?

Rule: Don’t ever trust the...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Forbidden Planet

Horror-adjacent Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Fred M. Wilcox

Written by: Cyril Hume

Released: 1956

Quote: “I'm in command of 18 competitively selected super-perfect physical specimens with an average age of 24.6 who have been locked up in hyperspace for 378 days. It would have served you right”

Poll: Pitch a remake.

Rule: Leave her alone!

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KY...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Terminator 2: Judgment Day

HORROR-ADJACENT SUITE

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: James Cameron

Written by: James Cameron & William Wisher

Released: 1991

Quote: “On August 29, 1997, it's gonna feel pretty fuckin' real to you too! Anybody not wearing two-million sunblock is gonna have a real bad day. Get it? God, you think you're safe and alive. You're already dead. Everybody! Him. You. You're dead already. This whole place, everything you see is gone! You're the one living in the dream, 'cau...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond 28 Years Later

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Danny Boyle

Written by: Alex Garland

Released: 2025

Quote: “Memento amorous. Remember you must love.”

Poll: When the shit hits the fan, what TV show are you putting on for the kids?

Rule: It’s always appropriate to ask questions when someone has a field of dead bodies.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our lo...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond 28 Days Later

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Danny Boyle

Written by: Alex Garland

Released: 2002

Quote: “That was more than a heartbeat.”

Poll: The shit goes down, where do you go first?

Rule: If you going to infect an animal with “Rage”, choose something that can’t rip you apart.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whal...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Godzilla Minus One

HORROR-ADJACENT SUITE

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Takashi Yamazaki

Written by: Takashi Yamazaki

Released: 2023

Quote: [Godzilla picks up a plane and tosses it casually.]

Poll: What sort of critters would be created by today’s dumb shit?

Rule: Come back alive.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and D...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Abigail

VAMPIRE SUITE

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin & Tyler Gillett

Written by: Stephen Shields & Guy Busick

Released: 2024

Quote: “Here's the thing about being a vampire, Frank. It takes a long fucking time to learn how to do all the cool shit.”

Poll: Which vampire group do you think you could survive?

Rule: Never take a job from Giancarlo Esposito.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a co...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Sinners

VAMPIRE SUITE

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Ryan Coogler

Written by: Ryan Coogler

Released: 2025

Quote: “You keep dancing with the devil... one day he's gonna follow you home.”

Poll: Why did Stack & Mary continue to leave Sammie unharmed into the 90s?

Rule: Don’t let white men in.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was creat...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Interview with the Vampire (1994)

Vampire Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Neil Jordan

Written by: Anne Rice

Released: 1994

Quote: “Don't be afraid. I'm going to give you the choice I never had.”

Poll: Would you have a vampire on your podcast?

Rule: Don’t be an evildoer.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Heart Eyes

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Josh Ruben

Written by: Phillip Murphy & Christopher Landon & Michael Kennedy

Released: 2025

Quote: “You can be so clueless sometimes; it's one of the ten things I hate about you, honestly. You can't let Jay go off to his best friend's wedding and hook up with a bunch of bridesmaids and move to Notting Hill. No. This is love, momma. Some kind of... wonderful, crazy stupid love, actually.”

Poll: Do Ally & Jay ma...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Monkey

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Osgood Perkins

Written by: Osgood Perkins, based on the short story by Stephen King

Released: 2025

Quote: “YAY!! THEY’RE BRINGING OUT THE BODY!!”

Poll: How would you keep the monkey from killing anyone else?

Rule: Leave the shit in Dad’s closet alone.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by B...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Salem’s Lot (1979)

Vampire Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Tobe Hooper

Written by: Paul Monash, based on the novel by Stephen King

Released: 1979

Quote: “Back, holy man! Back, shaman! Back, priest!”

Poll: How do you identify the main character?

Rule: If you’re in a Stephen King story, rapidly identify the main character and stay far away from them.

Check out Polterguest Ryan’s Patreon & upcoming book, Say Uncle.

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Shadow of the Vampire

Vampire Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: E. Elias Merhige

Written by: Steven Katz

Released: 2000

Quote: “I don't think we need the writer any longer. — I don't expect you to understand this, and I am loathe to admit it myself, but the writer is necessary.”

Poll: Did this film “Bowfinger” the real Max Schreck?

Rule: Don’t hire non-union actors.

If you enjoyed this, please consider...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Nosferatu (2024)

 Vampire Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Robert Eggers

Written by: Robert Eggers

Released: 2024

Quote: “I have seen things in this world that would make Isaac Newton crawl back into his mother's womb!”

Poll: Fuck, marry, kill: Max Schreck,  Klaus Kinski, Bill Skarsgård.

Rule: Don’t ever, ever have sexy feelings, unless you’re a man.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi...

It's time for our year-end recap! Your Polterguides reflect on our top movies, favorite episodes, and more from 2024, plus what we're looking forward to in 2025.

Enjoy, and be sure to connect with us on Instagram, Facebook, Threads, or BlueSky! Tell us what you're excited about for the upcoming year, and feel free to share any movie recommendations we should check out.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Some parts of i...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Monster Squad

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Fred Dekker

Written by: Shane Black & Fred Dekker

Released: 1987

Quote: “They blew it.”

Poll: What famed monster hunter would you want to get the “thumbs-up” from?

Rule:  Believe that, at least, something is going on when a man insists he is a werewolf.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Totally Killer

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Nahnatchka Khan

Written by: David Matalon & Sasha Perl-Raver & Jen D'Angelo

Released: 2023

Quote: “Can you please just see ‘Back to the Future’?”

Poll: What carnival/amusement park ride would you want to be your time machine?

Rule: Yeah, so uh, the first thing you wanna do if you see the killer is run. Remember, avoid the knife... keep your life.

If you enjoyed this, please cons...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Ready or Not

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin & Tyler Gillett

Written by: Guy Busick & R. Christopher Murphy

Released: 2019

Quote: “Let's go take a walk, find you an edible, even you out a little bit.”

Poll: If you were a member of Le Domas family, and weren’t really happy about it, and found someone you loved, what would you do?

Rule: Before you get married, ask for details on what “fucked-up family” means.

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Final Girls

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Todd Strauss-Schulson

Written by: M.A. Fortin & Joshua John Miller

Released: 2015

Quote: “You just fucked with the wrong virgin.”

Poll: What movie would you want to be transported into?

Rule: Eyes on the road.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Some...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Speak No Evil (2024)

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: James Watkins

Written by: James Watkins, based on the screenplay by Christian Tafdrup & Mads Tafdrup

Released: 2024

Quote: “We believe honesty is the first step to fixing things.”

Poll: What pop song would you want to hear sang menacingly?

Rule: Sometimes it’s ok to not be polite.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Tim Burton

Written by: Alfred Gough & Miles Millar

Released: 2024

Quote: “I believe it was Dostoevsky that said... ‘Later, fucker!’”

Poll: Who is your favorite new dead person?

Rule: A. Don’t listen to your boyfriend when he tells you to stop taking your prescribed medication. B. Sometimes you need to break the rules.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-f...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Silence of the Lambs

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Jonathan Demme

Written by: Ted Tally, based upon the novel by Thomas Harris

Released: 1991

Quote: “You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well-scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste. Good nutrition's given you some length of bone, but you're not more than one generation from poor white trash, are you, Agent Starling? And that acc...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Alien: Romulus

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Fede Alvarez

Written by: Fede Alvarez & Rodo Sayagues

Released: 2024

Quote: “Thank you, and remember the company is grateful for your enduring service.”

Poll: If the company has been looking for Ripley this whole time, why do they not believe her when they finally find her?

Rule: A: Never trust Weyland-Yutani. B: Don’t get pregnant; but if you do, don’t take drugs.

If you en...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond New Nightmare

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Wes Craven

Written by: Wes Craven

Released: 1994

Quote: “‘Choice? What kind of choice?’ ‘Whether or not you will be willing to play Nancy one last time.’”

Poll: Which icons would you want to see cross over the fictional divide?

Rule: Buy into the premise, quickly.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: John McNaughton

Written by: Richard Fire & John McNaughton

Released: 1986

Quote: “Who you think you're associating with anyway?”

Poll: What did you do or watch immediately after this movie to start scrubbing it from your memory?

Rule: Don’t abuse children.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was crea...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Wicker Man (1973)

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Robin Hardy

Written by: Anthony Shaffer & David Pinner

Released: 1973

Quote: “The Producer would like to thank The Lord Summerisle and the people of his island off the west coast of Scotland for this privileged insight into their religious practices and for their generous co-operation in the making of this film.”

Poll: Did they kill Lord Summerisle next year?

Rule: Learn to be a good guest.

...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Watchers

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Ishana Night Shyamalan

Written by: Ishana Night Shyamalan, based on the novel by A.M. Shine

Released: 2024

Quote: “Try not to die.”

Poll: When did you figure out the Madeline twist?

Rule: Check under the rug.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Som...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Talk to Me

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Danny & Michael Philippou

Written by: Danny Philippou & Bill Hinzman, based on a concept by Daley Pearson

Released: 2023

Quote: “He’ll split ya, pretty boy. He’ll split ya.”

Poll: Would you grab the hand?

Rule: Rules are put in place for a reason, Mia.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was create...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Cujo

Stephen King Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Lewis Teague

Written by: Don Carlos Dunaway & Lauren Currier, based on the novel by Stephen King

Released: 1983

Quote: “Fuck you, dog.”

Poll: How should Donna Trenton have answered the question about her affair?

Rule: Vaccinate your pets!

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Maximum Overdrive

Stephen King Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Stephen King

Written by: Stephen King

Released: 1986

Quote: “Honey, come on over here, sugar buns. This machine just called me an asshole.”

Poll: What the fuck/Why?

Rule: Maybe he’s great at everything; maybe it’s just cocaine.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Dead Zone

Stephen King Suite

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: David Cronenberg

Written by: Jeffrey Boam, based on the novel by Stephen King

Released: 1983

Quote: “The ICE... is gonna BREAK!”

Poll: What would your parameters be if you were to go back in time to kill Hitler?

Rule: Life is short; sleep with your romantic partner.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A4...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Misery

STEPHEN KING SUITE 

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Rob Reiner

Written by: William Goldman, based on the novel by Stephen King

Released: 1990

Quote: “Isn’t that an oogy mess?”

Poll: What author would you like to write a book in your honor?

Rule: Call for backup, especially when backup is the missus.

2nd Law: Seek professional help.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Late Night with the Devil

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Colin Cairnes & Cameron Cairnes

Written by: Colin Cairnes & Cameron Cairnes

Released: 2024

Quote: “Unpredictable? That’s why we still do live TV!”

Poll: Do you think Jack left the Grove cult?

Rule: If your guests need restraints, don’t cut the straps.

First Law: Listen to women!

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Little Monsters (2019)

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Abe Forsythe

Written by: Abe Forsythe

Released: 2019

Quote: “I can’t shoot kids… again.”

Poll: What is your zombie apocalypse theme song?

Rule: Let the kids in. Also, Star Wars.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Some parts of it are used under...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Imaginary

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Jeff Wadlow

Written by: Jeff Wadlow & Greg Erb & Jason Oremland

Released: 2024

Quote: “Characters who do bad things aren’t all bad.”

Poll: Do you remember your imaginary friend?

Rule: Careful which white women you trust.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Some parts of...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Lisa Frankenstein

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Zelda Williams

Written by: Diablo Cody

Released: 2024

Quote: “I told you I’d hold your stupid hand.”

Poll: Without the malfunctioning tanning bed, how are they going to fix Lisa?

Rule: If your undead boyfriend offers to kill someone for you, in the immortal words of Nancy Reagan, “Just say no.”

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Fly (1986)

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: David Cronenberg

Written by: Charles Edward Pogue & David Cronenberg

Released: 1986

Quote: “At the very least, it should make a fabulous children’s book.”

Poll: What happened to that second baboon?

Rule: Don’t drink & beam.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cragg.

Some parts...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond Destroy All Neighbors

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Josh Forbes

Written by: Charles Pieper & Jared Logan

Released: 2024

Quote: “Rock & roll’s about being on time.”

Poll: What would have happened if William had gone over & knocked on Vlad’s door?

Rule: Learn to use your voice.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying us a coffee? https://ko-fi.com/A487KYM

Our logo was created by Billy Whala and Debbie Cra...

Beyond the Cabin in the Woods goes beyond The Voices

IMDB Synopsis

Directed by: Marjane Satrapi

Written by: Michael R. Perry

Released: 2014

Quote: “You remember last week when you said that there was an invisible line that separates good from evil and you'd thought you crossed it and I said no, no, no, you're a good boy?... I’ve changed my opinion.”

Poll: If your pet could talk to you, what do you think it would say?

Rule: Send the cops when coworke...